Chapter 19
Chapter
Nineteen
-KADIAN-
“Are you insane?”
My heart stuttered, and I froze mid-step, pulse thudding in my ears. That tone—clipped, disdainful—was one I’d reluctantly become familiar with. Fuck me.
“Iona,” I muttered, my fingers curling into fists. “Why the fuck are you here?”
She stepped forward, the dim torchlight catching on her leather-clad form. Her smile pierced as sharply as the blade I’d feared.
“Is there a reason you insist on continuing to punish me with your presence?” I yanked my arm free as her hand reached out to grab me.
Her grip was firm, and for a moment, I thought she might try again, but instead, she crossed her arms and stared at her nails.
She was dressed for battle. She wasn’t blending in—not even trying.
“Answer me, why are you here?”
Her voice dripped with mockery. “Honestly, Kadian, breaking into the scribes’ quarters?
Do you even have a plan? Or are you just hoping luck sees you through?
I wouldn’t be surprised if that is as far as the plan extended, but I’m hoping for your sake that there is more to it than this.
But then again, you have sort of just…waltzed into things lately. Haven’t you?”
“I don’t owe you an explanation,” I said, rubbing the bridge of my nose, dreading the fact that she was right.
My head already throbbed. Two minutes with her, and I was forcing my hands into fists.
Stay calm. What does Brida always do? Breathe?
We always breathe, how does that make you relax?
We always breathe, otherwise we die. Really, what a stupid…
“This has to be the worst-laid plan I’ve ever seen,” she drawled, leaning lazily against the damp stone wall as if the corridors of the scribes’ quarters were her personal lounge.
My patience snapped. “How did you even know I was here?” I pressed myself against the cold stone, wishing the shadows would swallow her and I could be on my way.
She rolled her eyes. Dramatic as ever. Why, Gods if you’re listening, are you doing this to me?
“If you’d done the polite thing—proper decorum, might I add—and introduced yourself to your neighbors in the House of Shadows, you might have learned something useful.”
“Like what?”
Her gaze gleamed, her smile taunting, daring me to connect the dots.
“You’re my neighbor? And you spied on me? You followed me to dinner, and then here?” Oz would be upset that she hadn’t sat with us. Come on, Kadian. Focus.
“Don’t flatter yourself,” she said breezily, her expression unimpressed. “It wasn’t that hard. You’re not exactly stealthy. Have you even tried to use the shadows to your advantage?”
I turned to leave, desperate to put space between us. “I don’t have time for this, Iona. Or you. Now, if you would, kindly, fuck off.”
I barely made it three steps before I felt a hand fist the collar of my shirt, slamming me back against the wall.
Iona from this morning had returned. The impact drove the breath from my lungs, and I gasped, struggling to right myself.
I was having flashbacks to the mat. Me, panting flat on my back, Iona standing over me, smiling bigger than I’d ever seen.
Her voice was low, dangerously calm as she leaned in, her breath annoyingly touching my face. “I know you remember, Kadian Taldot.”
Does she mean the wedding?
“I’m not sure how many of us remember, but I know for a fact that you do.” She loosened her grip just enough for me to catch my breath.
“I think Asana does, too. Thalius? Definitely. That bastard never forgets anything. Such a farce. We’re of the water, we’re calm. So calm that he murdered someone in the middle of a wedding. A wedding.”
Thalius. The name radiated through my mind, a bell chiming over and over. If he ever goes near Lil again. I will kill him.
“But you…” She let the word hang in the air between us, her gaze boring into mine, eyes glowing with… something. “You don’t remember it all yet. Not fully. But you will. Soon enough.”
Not fully remember… “I don’t have time for your riddles, come out with it, Iona. If you have something to say, then say it. No need for me to suffer your presence endlessly when this could be over in minutes,” I said through gritted teeth, shoving her hand away.
Her laugh was bitter, tinged with something that almost sounded like regret.
“This isn’t how things were supposed to be.
You know that. Whatever the Wind Walkers whispered to everyone, it wasn’t the truth.
They’re covering up what happened. At the weddings.
My wedding. And I know you know. You should have chosen your words more carefully, Kadian. ”
My words… The raw pain in her voice gave me pause, and for a brief moment, the ever-confident Iona seemed.
.. human. Vulnerable. What had I said? I say stuff all the time without thinking.
Brida always told me it would come back, and I quote, “get you into serious trouble one day. Try to think before you speak.” Gods, why was she always right?
I paused, forcing myself to think. What had I said? And then it struck me, as if an earthquake were happening beneath my feet. A trembling in my body at the realization at how foolish I’d been.
“It’s a nice feeling to be genuinely wanted by one of the princes.
Would you know anything about that, Iona?
” … “Not used to a man willingly touching you?” I had said that to her.
While the rest of Azmeer had forgotten the betrothal between Iona and the dark prince, I hadn’t. And I’d told her as much.
“Fine,” I said, exhaling sharply, moving myself away from her. “What of it?”
Her expression softened as she stepped back, giving me space. “I’m here to help you.”
I blinked, her words catching me off guard. “Come again?” I didn’t know whether to scream or laugh. Maybe something in between. “You want to help me? You do know you’re speaking to me, Kadian, right?”
“Yes, Kadian,” she said, exasperated. “Do keep up.”
“Why?” My tone was flat, skeptical. “Do you know why I’ve come down here? If I’m caught, you risk being implicated. And while we’re not friends, and not that I’d want us to be, you don’t seem like someone who knows how to look out for anyone other than themself.”
Her lips quivered into a smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes. “Because, whether you like it or not, we’re tied to this mess together. And if there’s one thing I’ve learned about you, Kadian Taldot, it’s that you’re terrible at keeping out of trouble.”
She brushed past me, the sway of her hips deliberate, and threw a look over her shoulder. “Now, are you coming? Or do I have to drag you down this corridor?”
With a resigned sigh, I followed, the dank, damp smell of the lower halls fading as we delved deeper. Whatever Iona’s reasons, I knew one thing for certain: she wasn’t leaving my side anytime soon. And Gods help me, I didn’t think I’d be able to break free of her even if I tried.
Mildew clung to the air as we walked past an open door to a sitting room on our left. Inside, the scribes sat motionless, heads bent over thick tomes, the glow of lanterns highlighting their silhouettes. Is this what Addie did every night? Would Brida have eventually done this, too?
Not a single scribe looked up as we continued to make our way down the halls, Iona guiding us with each and every sway and step. I had to stop gritting my teeth, by the time we’d turn around the third corner, my jaw had begun to ache.
“This isn’t your first time down here,” I said, keeping my voice low, attempting not to cough. The stench, the confined space. This was misery. How do these people live without clean air down here? Are there windows? Anywhere?
“No,” Iona replied flatly, her gaze fixed ahead. She offered nothing more. I wasn’t sure what I expected. “Here to help.” Did that mean she would keep silent in the meantime? Try not to get your hopes up, Kad. It’s unlikely.
The walls were all made of the same stone.
It was no place where I’d want to live, or even rest my head.
The smell alone would have driven me to madness.
Unlike the light, cooler colors of the palace above, everything down here was deeper blues, grays, and almost moss green.
Is that moss growing in the corner? Despite the almost constant quiet, there was the odd scurrying sound—mice attempting to pick up the scraps left behind from the day.
Other than paper, I’m not sure what they’ll find down here. That and shit conversation.
The corridor forked, and without hesitation, Iona led us to the left, her boots tapping softly against the stone floor. “What exactly are you hoping to find down here?” she asked, her tone lacking the usual sharpness I had come to associate with her.
I hesitated before answering. How can I be sure she’s not lying? That she really does want to help? “I know you remember.” I know she knows, but…
With a resigned sigh, I said, “I’m looking for Addie’s rooms.” The words came out rough, dragged from a place of exhaustion and frustration I didn’t have the energy to hide.
Iona turned her head slightly, just enough for me to catch the shift in her expression.
“I’m sorry about what happened to her.” For the first time since this ordeal began, her words carried no bite.
Instead, they were weighted with something that felt uncomfortably like sincerity.
I wasn’t sure if that or her normal tone made me feel worse.
She brought us to a halt before a door at the far end of what appeared to be an abandoned hallway.
Like everything else down here, it was silent, unassuming, but somehow significant, like it knew secrets I was desperate to uncover.
Iona faced me, her lips twitching into something that might have been a smirk under better lighting.
“Let me do the talking,” she said. Before I could respond, she knocked on the door and stepped back, arms crossed as if daring me to object.