Chapter 20 #2
As quietly as we made our way into Addie’s room, we left. The room was sparser and more organized than when we’d arrived.
“Is the hallway darker?” I found myself asking as we navigated our way through.
“Could you draw less attention to us?”
The sooner this is all said and done, the sooner I can get away from Iona. What a glorious time that will be.
“It was good to meet you, Edrick.” I said as I offered him my hand. We’d made our way to the library.
Offering an appreciative nod, he clasped mine. “Very nice to meet you, Kadian. Addie has only ever said wonderful things. There was a time, you know, when she thought you and Brida might end up together.”
“It’s kind she thought so. But… no.”
His small chuckle lifted a bit of the weight from my shoulders. “Regardless, she’s grateful for the role you’ve played and will continue to play in Brida’s life.”
“Thank you, Edrick.” My voice softened as I pulled my hand away. “We’ll get these back to you soon.” Gesturing down at the folder, Iona then said her goodbye and we began our long trek back to the House of Shadows.
One of the things I had loved about Azmeer when I had first arrived was its size.
I had never been anywhere or experienced anything like it.
Escalia was small. Everyone knew everyone, for better or for worse, in Brida’s case, and it was familiar.
In Azmeer, every corner, every turn could yield something new, something unexpected.
I reveled in that. In the newness of it all, in the…
“Why are you just standing there?”
Fuck me.
“What do you mean? We just got to this level, and I am taking a breath before we start moving.” The air up here was perfect. Walking through the colonnades that opened into a garden, one of the hundreds within the palace walls, I was grateful for something to tether me.
Iona’s eyes blazed to life with each step she took towards me. “Gods, have you not even tried it yet?”
“Tried what?” The words felt as if they were catching in my throat.
“Did you not say, repeatedly, I might add, that the room and everything down there was getting darker?” She placed her hands on her hips, knowing she was about to get the answer she hoped for.
“Yes…”
“And did you not think that maybe, just maybe, there was a reason for that?”
The fury that crested her brow was the only reasonable response from Iona for the blank expression that rested on my face. “Have you been granted some magic to do with shadows, Iona? I’m not sure that will brighten up your personality.”
“Oh, for Gods’ sake. Kadian, you can shadow-step.”
“No, I can’t,” I said firmly. That’s something that I, the shadow-stepper, would know I could do… Wouldn’t it?
Iona took a step closer, lowering her voice to a level that would have scared the Primals themselves. “Have you even tried to summon magic since becoming a court member?”
The sorting ceremony had been a few days earlier, and with everything going on, I hadn’t given it much… any thought.
“I, uh,” I stammered, my hands playing with the folder.
“Were you not thinking about being somewhere else while down there? Did you want to escape the room? Did it feel as if the walls were beginning to close in on you? That the darkness would swallow you whole. As if you were being sucked into the depths of…”
“Enough!” I shouted. But as the words left my lips, Iona’s smile grew feral as she looked down towards my feet. Shadows swirled there, dancing around me as if just waiting for a command.
Holy Gods.
Iona’s grin grew larger, thrilled by this development. “Excellent, now we won’t have to carry all of these back. Come on, let’s go.”
Come on, let’s go. As if it were that simple.
“How is this possible?” I whispered, staring at my hands where shadows jumped along my fingertips. These shadows were different from the ones I’d seen surrounding Dainan and Asana. These were lighter in their appearance. Textured rather than smooth.
“You’re a member of the Court of Shadows now, and Vasenia, who has questionable taste, has found you worthy of shadow-stepping. Now, shadow-step us back to the House of Shadows. I’m tired and want to get a few hours of sleep before we have to be up in the morning.”
“How can you be so calm about this!” I practically screamed while trying not to draw attention to us. My heart was racing, and not just from the rage that Iona’s presence offered.
“Because I thought you would have tried something already. How is it you’ve been a member for days and not thought to see if Vasenia had gifted you anything! Honestly Kadian, have some self-worth. Now, I’m tired, and I want to shower, so for the love of the Gods, move us already.”
Clearing my throat, I took a step towards her, lowering my voice as much as possible. “I, uh…I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do… I’ve never shadow-stepped before.” I had wind-walked, and that had been miserable. Would this be the same?
“Oh for fuck’s sake.” Iona stretched out her arms, wrapping them around me in a way that normal people might have viewed as a forced embrace.
To me, it was a toxic touch, my body wanting to reject her, repel her off of me.
Just endure this for a few moments longer.
Then we will never have to do this again.
“Close your eyes, take a deep breath, and will us to the House of Shadows.”
“It can’t be…”
“Kadian, so help me, just DO IT.”
My skin burned, as if Iona’s rage bubbled below my skin. Squeezing my eyes tight, I wished us to be in the House of Shadows. As soon as we were there, I would be free of her.
I thought of the Atrium to the House of Shadows.
The fiery walls that greeted you once the door permitted entry.
My room and its vastness, Tura in her library.
With each thought, a trembling sensation tickled against my legs.
I inhaled deeply and was greeted to the smell of…
a forest? Pine, snow on a cool morning, the nothingness of a desert. It overcame me.
I opened my eyes to see we were entombed in a storm.
One of shadow and sand, each battling for supremacy.
Granules of gold flecked the dark shadows as they swirled around us, the world fading into obscurity just beyond its border.
The sensation was nothing like wind-walking.
This was different. Darkness and light fighting each other.
The smell of earth greater than that of smoke.
There was no breeze. No cool air. It was dry. Cracked, but alive.
“Why are we here?” Iona said, releasing my waist as she opened her eyes.
We had moved. I moved us.
“You do realize this is not our house, correct? Do you have any concept of which court you belong to?” Her ember-filled eyes sparked to life with each word she uttered.
The walls here were green, the door an ancient stone. We were at the Eternal House.
Iona unleashed an exasperated sigh as her arms hit the sides of her legs. “At least we’re closer to the House of Shadows. But honestly,” she looked at me, “get yourself sorted.”
I stared down at my hands in wonder… What the fuck is happening to me?
After struggling to put one foot behind the other, unable to cease staring at my hands, we walked the remainder of the way to the House of Shadows in silence.
A silence I was grateful for as my mind had not stopped whirling.
Can’t even master shadow-stepping. I was given magic and have zero idea how to use it.
Failed Brida… Failed Addie… Failed Lil. Now I have failed myself.
“Start messing around with it. See what else you can do. I’ll see you in the morning.” Iona yelled over her shoulder as she made her way inside once we’d arrived.
Paralyzed, I was frozen to the spot until a voice slithered into my mind.
Well, well, it appears someone is starting to play.
Sighing, I began my journey towards the door. “I’m not sure playing has anything to do with it.”
The voice laughed. Oh, sweet Kadian. All of this is a game. The pieces are starting to move. I cannot wait to see where they fall.
Was she right? Were we all just pawns in whatever game was taking place in Azmeer? What would become of us? Of this place?
The only way to find out is to play the game.
“Play the game,” I whispered. I could do that. If it was what was necessary to save Brida, to get Lil back to me, I would play this game.
Your move, Kadian.