Chapter 14 #2
His expression softened. “I am sorry. I hoped she might have better news for you.”
“Have you been to her as well?” I asked.
“Yes,” he said, glancing at his hand, at the same place where she had cut me.
“And what did she tell you?”
He gave a quiet snort. “That I will lose something I did not know I loved. But it sounds like a useless fortune.”
On our way back to the palace, my gaze caught on a tailor’s show window. A stunning red gown dominated the display. Perhaps too bold for my taste, but impossible to ignore. Alarics’s words echoed in my mind: “Buy yourself a nice dress in the White City.”
The coin was already running thin. I had no need to parade in more gowns. And my brother...
Only death will end his suffering.
“Are you coming?” Aidenar called from farther down the street.
I tore my gaze away and hurried to him.
When we returned to the Palace, we encountered Velena in the main courtyard. The diamonds in her diadem caught the light when she saw us. She approached with measured grace, every step deliberate.
“Lord Cavareth. Lady Veymaris.” Her gaze flicked between us. “Together.”
“I met the Lady in the city and escorted her back,” Aidenar said. His attention never left Velena. “Do you require my assistance?”
“You promised me lunch,” Velena replied smoothly. “We are late.”
“Oh. That was today.” He inclined his head. “Forgive me. The Gathering has muddled my sense of days. Let’s go, then.”
He turned to me and offered a polite bow before leaving at her side.
The following day, the Gathering passed without argument. Velena beamed, practically glowing, her arm threaded through Aidenar’s. Clearly, their lunch had exceeded expectations.
As the lords departed the Inner Court, Aidenar came to stand beside me.
“Your mother still said nothing of the wolves that attacked us,” I said.
“You know why,” he met my gaze.
“Are you ashamed to be seen with me?” I asked.
He studied me for a long moment. “Is this about yesterday? About Velena? I thought it was you that wanted to keep our... arrangement as secret as possible. I have nothing to hide.”
I left the square and returned to my chambers alone.
The moment I opened the door, the stench struck me. A smell I knew too well. The putrid reek of old fish and rotting harbors.
In the center of the room stood a barrel, water seeping from its base. Inside were fish heads and entrails. My clothes lay scattered across the floor, smeared with dark marine slime.
What in the names of forgotten gods…
I looked around the room trying to comprehend. But I already knew.
Velena’s smile today. Bright as a lark.
That fucking bitch.
I turned on my heel and left my chambers. I crossed the Inner Court in a fury. The water in the fountains swelled and spilled over their edges. Each step I took echoed like a drumbeat in a well. The ground trembled beneath me. My breath came heavy, ragged.
Nothing could stop this now. The moment I found her, I’d rip her head off. No power. No blades. I would simply break her delicate little chicken neck with my bare hands.
“Nerissa.”
I did not turn.
“Nerissa! What are you doing?”
Dricus stepped into my path.
“I can feel you throughout the entire palace,” he said sharply. “You are flooding the courtyard. What happened?”
“None of your business”
“Hey!” His voice sharpened. “You need to control this. Don’t let it consume you.”
“I have a matter to settle.”
“Whatever you intend to do is a mistake. You will regret it,” he said, gripping my wrist hard enough that I could not pull free. “Come with me.”
I stared at him, weighing whether I could strike him hard enough to escape. I knew I couldn’t. But rage boiled inside me.
“Go on,” he said low, almost a growl. “Show me. Is that what you want? For all of them to see you drown this city? To let fury rule you? To belong to nothing but the element? You have nothing to lose, do you?”
I panted, staring at him.
He was right.
I was losing control.
I forced myself to breathe.
“Good,” Dricus said, watching as I drew deep breaths, my chest rising and falling beneath his gaze. “Come.”
He took me to the stables, set me upon a horse, and ordered me to follow him. We rode past the city center and toward the harbor beach.
The sea.
We left the horses behind. I removed my boots and walked barefoot across the sand. The sound of the waves calmed me at once, as if Dricus had known exactly what I needed.
We walked slowly. The sun was already sinking.
“Will you tell me what happened,” he said.
“Nothing important.”
“Important enough that you nearly drowned half the palace.”
“I am tired of this place,” I said. “Of this city.”
He smiled faintly. “You are not alone in that.”
“What is your home like?” I asked.
“Emberhold?” He sighed. “A city of spice and smoke. Red walls, narrow streets, palms and rooftop gardens, hidden oases. Heat like the last pit of hells. Beyond it, sand and blood. It is not an easy place to live. But it is mine.”
I heard the longing beneath his words. Home. I had been thinking of mine more often as well. This city suffocated me.
I stirred the sea. The waves answered, their rhythm deepening. Dricus felt it. He looked at me with approval. He knew how difficult it was to keep an element in check. It was good to be with someone who understood. Someone who did not fear me.
We sat on the shore in silence, watching the sun sink into the sea.
My arm rested against his. I felt the heat of him bleeding through the thin linen of his shirt.
Beneath it, I knew there was nothing but hard muscle and sun-touched skin.
I drew in a breath and his scent filled my lungs: sweat and sea salt, smoke and something indefinably him.
Maybe Aidenar was right. Maybe I was allowed to have desires. Maybe I didn’t have to restrain myself forever.
When the sun vanished, Dricus stood and offered me his hand. He pulled me to my feet. I stood fast and so close to him that my palms rested against his chest. I knew he felt it too. He could not stop looking at me. He didn’t let me go. We stood there in immortal silence. I waited.
I licked my dry lips. His gaze dropped there, and I took it as an invitation.
I kissed him. It was my leap of bravery.
His mouth was soft and hot from the sun. I tasted salt on his lips. I began gently, but couldn’t hold back. Being alone for so long, restraining myself from everything.
I let my tongue slide against his, and he answered.
Our powers brushed. Intertwined. A rush of euphoria bloomed between us, as though the elements themselves had been waiting for this dance. Heat surged through me, softer this time, asking rather than taking. This time I wasn’t afraid. I was ready. I let the warmth spread through my body.
Dricus kissed me deeper, more fervently. I moaned softly.
He gripped my wrists tightly and stopped.
He tore his lips from mine, holding my wrists with crushing force, almost painful, and pushed me away.
I stared at him, terrified.
“No,” he said.
My eyes wide, lips parted.
“I cannot,” he said, looking at the ground. He would not meet my gaze.
He regretted that.
I’d thrown myself at him like some stupid fool. What had I expected? And he…
“Nerissa...” he began, but I couldn’t listen anymore. The humiliation.
I wrenched my hands free and strode toward my horse as fast as I could.
Idiot. Fool. Stupid, stupid girl.
What had I thought? That it would be different? That someone would see something more than a girl full of power and problems?
I galloped toward the palace, wind whipping tears from the corners of my eyes. When I entered my chambers, servants had removed the barrel of fish. Mirabel must have sent my clothes to be laundered. But I could still smell decay in the room. I was going to vomit.
This cursed place.