CHAPTER 15
Regret
I slip quietly back into our bed. The sheets are still warm from earlier, from before everything felt like it had cracked open.
I lie on my side, staring into the darkness, trying to slow my breathing.
Minutes pass. Or maybe longer. I don’t move, I keep my eyes closed, listening to every sound in the house.
Eventually I hear the bedroom door open quietly.
His footsteps are soft as he walks in. The mattress dips slightly as he sits down on the edge of the bed.
I keep my breathing slow, even. Pretending to sleep.
After a moment he lies down beside me. The bed shifts as he moves closer and his arm slides around my waist. I feel his breath against the back of my neck and then his lips brush softly against my skin.
A slow kiss just below my ear and my entire body goes still.
He pulls me closer, his chest pressed gently against my back.
Like nothing happened tonight. Like everything is normal. His hand finds mine under the blanket. For a moment I hesitate. My mind is spinning. Blood in the sink. The look on his face. The man I thought I knew.
But slowly… almost without meaning to… I let him hold my hand.
My fingers curl around his. Not out of comfort, not out of love. But out of something I can’t quite name. Something darker that sits quietly in the pit of my stomach.
The next morning Dominic wakes up like nothing happened. He moves through the bedroom quietly, getting dressed for work, the usual routine unfolding as if the night before never existed.
I get ready too. We move around each other in silence, the air between us strangely calm. Before he leaves, Dominic stops near the door. He walks over to me, cups my cheek gently, and presses a soft kiss to my lips.
“I love you,” he says. His eyes search mine for a moment. “And whatever this is… whatever we’re going through… we’ll get through it together. I’ll do anything for us, Era.”
I force a small smile.
“Yeah,” I say softly.
He nods, grabs his keys, and leaves for work. The door closes behind him. A few minutes later I’m sitting in my car in the driveway. The engine is running, but I don’t move. A heavy feeling settles in my chest.
Dread.
I can’t explain why. Eventually I back out of the driveway and head to work. The office is already buzzing when I walk in. Phones ringing, printers humming, people moving quickly between desks with folders and coffee cups.
As I step toward my cubicle, my phone buzzes. A text message. From a number I don’t recognize.
Can we please talk?
A second message appears almost immediately.
It’s Lucien.
I frown slightly. How did he even get my number? Then I answer my own question. He’s the owner of the company. Of course he has access to everyone’s information.
Still…
I lock my phone and ignore the message. I settle into my desk and start the morning routine.
Checking incoming invoices, updating financial spreadsheets, reviewing expense reports from the previous week, forwarding budget approvals to accounting.
Scheduling Andrew’s meetings and preparing the files he’ll need for the afternoon.
Normal, routine. Exactly what I need. Eventually I grab a folder and head toward Andrew’s office.
But before I get there, someone stops me.
“Hey.” I turn.
James.
“I was actually just heading to your cubicle,” he says.
“For what?”
“So we can switch seats.”
I blink. “What do you mean?”
“Well,” he says casually, “since I’ll be supporting Andrew now, I need to be closer to his office.” He gestures down the hallway. “And you’ll need to be closer to Lucien’s.”
A small knot twists inside me.
“Is he here?” I ask.
James shakes his head. “I don’t think so. I heard he’s supposed to start the whole transition process next week.” Relief washes over me. The last thing I need right now is to deal with whatever complicated feelings Lucien stirred up in me.
“Okay,” I say.
James adds, “Also, I’m sorry for—” Before he can finish, Andrew’s voice cuts across the office. He’s on the phone, waving James over impatiently.
“James! I need last week’s report. Now!”
James sighs and gives me an apologetic look.
“Sorry,” he says quickly. “I’ll see you in a bit.”
I watch him hurry toward Andrew’s office, already knowing what he was trying to say.
He’s apologizing for trading bosses like I’m some file being moved across desks.
And honestly… he’s not wrong. This whole thing feels messy.
I head back to my desk, gather my things, and walk toward James’s old cubicle.
But as I approach the corner office next to it…
I stop. Lucien is standing there, leaning against the doorway of his office. Waiting. He’s looking directly at me. We lock eyes, and I turn away, pushing down whatever I’m feeling.
“Sera—wait.” Lucien’s voice stops me before I can walk away.
I freeze.
“Please,” he says quietly. “Just… come inside. I need to talk to you.”
For a moment I hesitate. My hand grips around the folder I’m holding.
I should keep walking, I know I should but my feet move anyway.
I step into his office and close the door behind me.
Lucien runs a hand through his hair, like he’s been waiting for this moment all morning and still doesn’t know how to start.
For a second neither of us speaks. The silence stretches between us until it feels fragile enough to shatter. Then he looks at me, really looks at me and something in my chest flutters under the weight of it.
“Sera, I—,” he says quietly, his voice rough, “tell me that what happened between us meant nothing to you.”
My breath catches. His eyes don’t leave mine. “Tell me you don’t feel anything,” he continues. “Tell me there’s nothing here… and I’ll walk away. I won’t bother you again.”
The silence cracks open between us. My heart beating harder than it should, the way he looks at me brings everything rushing back.
The river.
The lanterns.
His hands on my cheeks.
The warmth of his hands at my waist.
For a moment it feels like my heart is being pulled.
A part of me remembers how full it felt standing next to him and how easy it was to breathe when he was close.
I swallow, forcing the words out. “I can’t Lucien.
It’s over. This whole thing was a mistake.
” My voice is softer and sadder than I expect.
“It meant nothing.” The words feel heavier than they should.
Like they’re breaking something fragile between us the moment they leave my mouth.
Lucien doesn’t answer right away. He just looks at me. Deeply. Waiting for me to take the words back, waiting for me to change my mind. My eyes drop to the floor because I don’t dare look at him again. I know if I do, the certainty in my voice might disappear.
The silence stretches between us. Then he exhales quietly.
“Alright,” he says. His voice is calm, but there’s something broken underneath it.
“If that’s what you want.” I hear him shift his weight slightly.
“I’m not walking away because I want to,” he adds softly.
“I’m walking away because you’re asking me to. ”
My breathing turns shallow. Footsteps. He moves past me toward the door as I keep staring at the floor.
Part of me expects him to stop, to turn around, to tell me I’m wrong.
To tell me I’m lying. I stand there, frozen, like I’m waiting for him to come back.
But he doesn’t. A moment later the door closes quietly behind him and I finally look up.
The office is empty, Lucien is gone and something sinks inside my chest. I step out into the hallway, my vision slightly blurred.
That’s when I almost run into Andrew.
“Hey—hey,” he says, catching my arm gently. “You okay?”
He studies my face with genuine concern. I try to pull myself together. “I’m fine,” I say quickly.
Andrew squints slightly. “I’d hug you,” he says jokingly, “but I really don’t want to get called into HR today.”
Despite everything, I let out a small laugh. “I just had a paper cut,” I say vaguely.
Andrew raises an eyebrow. “That’s the most dramatic reaction to a paper cut I’ve ever seen.”
I shake my head with a weak smile. “Can I leave early today?” I ask. “I’m not feeling well.”
Andrew nods immediately. “Yeah, of course. Go home. We’ll survive without you for a day.”
“Thanks.” I grab my bag and head out of the office before my emotions catch up with me. The drive home feels longer than usual. My hands stay tight around the steering wheel as the road stretches endlessly in front of me. My mind won’t stop replaying everything.
Dominic, Lucien, the blood in the sink, the way Lucien looked at me before he walked away.
Two completely different worlds pulling at me in opposite directions and my chest feels heavy with it.
By the time I pull into the driveway, my vision is already blurring.
I park the car and sit there for a moment.
And then it hits me. The tears come suddenly, spilling down my face before I can stop them.
I grip the steering wheel as I cry, my shoulders shaking with the weight of everything I’m carrying.
The truth I’m too afraid to face. Eventually the tears slow.
I wipe my face with the sleeve of my jacket and step out of the car.
The front door opens with a quiet creak and I walk inside.