16. CHAPTER 16
SEBASTIAN - FOUR YEARS AGO
T he air was cold and damp. Drizzle fell from the night sky as a full moon illuminated the path for me.
The cold air hit my lungs a little too sharply, causing me to grab my ribs.
I climbed over the gated fence, landing clumsily on the garden lawn.
Clive, the groundsman, had said he’d leave the kitchen patio doors unlocked for me.
I didn’t want Aria to see me. I didn’t want her to know I was leaving. But I had to.
The dried blood on my cracked knuckles caught my eye in the soft moonlight. If Hayden hadn’t pulled me off him, I would have killed Nicholas tonight.
He would have deserved it.
He’d challenged me to a fight, and I’d welcomed it.
He soon backed down when he realised the only reason he was alive was because of Hayden.
I fumbled with the patio door, quietly pulling it open as I crept inside, closing it gently behind me. The moonlight shone into the room as I unbuttoned my shirt, pulling it down over my shoulders.
“Why are you always creeping about in the dead of night?”
I looked up, startled to see Aria standing there with her arms folded, tapping her foot on the floor.
“Fuck, Nyx. What are you even doing up at this time?” I shrugged my shirt back over my shoulders, starting to button it back up.
She didn’t need to see the cuts and bruises under it.
“I couldn’t sleep, so I came down to get a drink. Then I saw you stumble across the patio.”
“Haven’t you got uni tomorrow?” I said, leaning against the counter.
She needed to go so she didn’t realise I was leaving. I knew it would hurt her.
She was the one thing I’d miss.
My light in the darkness.
She furrowed her brows at me. “Why are you acting so suspicious?” She took a step closer. “What are you up to?”
“Hayden’s waiting for me.”
“What happened to your eye?”
Her fingers gently grazed over my eyebrow, and I held in a hiss. Her eyes drifted down to my shirt, and she started to unbutton it.
“What are you doing?”
She gently pushed it off my shoulders, and it fell to the floor. “Sebastian, why are you covered in marks? You told me you weren’t going to fight again.” Her eyes met mine.
She traced over them lightly, tingling every nerve in my body all at once, sending out signals to light every part of me up. This was wrong on so many levels. I could feel the connection we had built shifting, going to places it had never been.
I gently took hold of her wrist, and her fingers stopped moving, but her eyes fixed on mine. “It’s fine, Nyx. Nothing you need to worry about.” My voice was soft and low.
“Let me get the first aid kit.” She smiled and disappeared from the kitchen. A few moments later, she returned, setting the box on the counter next to me and taking a wipe out. I sucked a breath in through my teeth as it made contact with the cut above my eye.
“Oh God, I’m so sorry.” She removed the wipe, placing it on the counter.
My fingers found hers. “You could never hurt me.” I brushed the loose bits of her hair that had fallen over her face from her bun behind her ear.
“Sebastian.” Her voice was lower than a whisper.
“Yeah.”
Before I knew it, her lips had landed on mine. My heart had just managed to break free from its cage. My arms just dangled at my side; I was unsure if I should kiss her back.
No, I shouldn’t. I took hold of her arms, pushing her back gently.
She looked at me for a split second, her cheeks bright red, before her eyes made their way to the floor.
“I’m so sorry,” she whispered.
She turned to run away, but I grabbed her wrist to stop her, forcing her to meet my gaze again.
“Nyx, wait.”
“Just forget it.”
I didn’t know what made me stop her from leaving. All I knew was my heart felt like it would suffocate without her.
My fingers traced down the side of her cheek, and my palm rested on her jaw, our eyes fixed on each other. This girl was beautiful.
She was more than that; she was stunning.
My hands soon found her hips, and I lifted her, turning us and sitting her on the edge of the counter. Her legs naturally opened, allowing my body to meet hers.
“Nyx,” I whispered.
“Shhh.” She placed her finger over my lips.
My gaze dropped to her pink lips, and I hesitated momentarily. My eyes found hers again, silently asking for permission. She nodded. My hands ran up her neck, resting on her cheeks. I leaned in, my lips softly meeting hers. They were warm and tasted sweet like cotton candy.
That one touch awakened every single part of my body.
It reached my soul—something that never happened with women.
The kiss became harder, more desperate, as I slid my tongue into her mouth.
I wanted to taste every bit of her. Hers met mine, and her hands locked into the back of my hair.
Her chest pressed against me as she tightly wrapped her arms around my neck, pushing our bodies closer.
She lightly grinded against my cock that was already begging to be inside her.
My hands found their way to her arse, squeezing it tight.
My body wanted all of her. It wanted her on this counter, right now.
Her fingers found my belt buckle, and she started to unclip it. My hand reached for hers, stopping her before she could fully get it open.
“Nyx, are you sure?” I asked her breathlessly.
She nodded. “Yes. I want you to be my first,” she whispered, her eyes shimmering at me.
Fuck.
I brushed her hair back again, resting my hands on her cheeks. “I’ll be gentle, I promise.” She nodded at me, and our lips met again, but this time more slowly.
My lips brushed across her cheek, and she tilted her head to the side, exposing more of her neck for me. I slowly kissed it, making my way down. Her breathing became heavier as I pushed her tank top strap down her shoulder.
Wait.
I shouldn’t be doing this.
She was my stepsister, someone I had promised to protect and keep safe. I was letting temptation cloud my judgment. She was pure perfection—an innocence I didn’t want to ruin. I was the complete opposite—dark chaos that broke everything it touched.
I needed to stop this.
My lips pressed onto hers, hard, raw and desperate, because I knew it was going to be the last time I kissed her.
I wrapped my hands around her waist and pulled her off the counter.
I pressed my lips to her forehead. “I’m sorry, Nyx.” It was barely a whisper.
She watched as I rushed to grab my shirt from the floor, then made my way to the patio, flinging the door open. I looked back at her standing there for a few seconds, confusion running through her face and such hurt in those eyes of hers.
Then, I stepped into the garden, closing the door behind me.
I jogged through the grounds and pulled myself back over the gate.
I ran my hand through my hair, gripping it tight before letting go. What the fuck was wrong with me? All these feelings were rushing around my body that shouldn’t be there.
It was better that I left. What could I ever give her? Darkness and pain?
No, she was better off without me and my shady world, dragging that light of hers down until it eventually went out.