Sebastian
Dinner last night hadn’t been as bad as I thought it would be. Berevan and Soran had made Aria feel like family. I knew they would, because that’s the type of people they were, and they knew how much I cared for her. I swallowed the lump back down in my throat.
Lying to her about everything was harder than I’d thought it was going to be.
I’d spent my life lying to my dad, to the world.
Everyone saw this rich, Chelsea boy exterior, but Aria always saw past that with me.
She saw the real me, and hiding this from her brought so much guilt. I’d never felt that with anyone before.
Soran tied the pashmen around my waist to ensure it sat correctly.
He was very particular about how Kurdish clothes should be worn.
Last year, I didn’t tie it properly, and I received a two-hour lecture on Kurdish tradition and the reasons behind their clothing.
He wasn’t going to let me make that mistake again this year.
Soran took a step back from me. “Perfect.” He smiled with pride running across his face. He then turned to face Hayden, who was pulling the loose-fitting trousers down slightly. “No, Hayden, you don’t wear them like that.” He marched over to him.
I threw Hayden a look, and he asked me to save him with his eyes, but I wasn’t going to.
It was fun watching Soran tell him off. As he straightened out Hayden’s charcoal outfit, I sneakily pulled the navy trousers I was wearing down, then straightened my white shirt that sat under the navy matching jacket.
Sure, the trousers were baggy, but even I couldn’t understand why they had to be so high up the waist.
Soran then wrapped the black and white traditional Kurdish scarf around his head and straightened his dark brown clothes in the mirror.
“Soran, day, xera bro!” Berevan shouted from outside the room.
She was telling him to hurry up and let’s go. Soran shook his head. “This woman will be the death of me.”
As soon as I stepped out of the room, my eyes locked onto Aria.
She was in a traditional Kurdish dress of soft midnight blue that flowed to the floor and had a beaded pattern embroidered into it.
A silky, long blue jacket was over the top, and a gold belt hugged her curves.
Her natural blonde hair sat in loose curls, framing her perfect face.
Damn, I never thought this girl could get any more beautiful, but she seemed to every time I saw her.
“Will you ever learn to put your jamana straight?” Berevan told Soran as she hurried over to him, straightening his head scarf.
“You were rushing me,” he told her.
I made my way over to Aria and slid my arm around her waist, leaning into her ear so no one could hear. “You take my breath away every time I look at you.”
She looked up at me and placed her palm on my chest. “You look pretty handsome yourself.” Her eyes shimmered in the light. “I can’t believe Berevan made all of these.”
Berevan was extremely talented in making Kurdish clothes. She had a shop in Edgware Road and was always busy. She had even managed to capture Serfina’s unique style in the burgundy Kurdish dress. But she was more like Soran when it came to anything Kurdish, and she had a traditional green dress on.
“Ok, let’s go,” Soran said, ushering us all with his hands.
Berevan frowned at him and said something in Kurdish. She was probably telling him not to tell her what to do. She was strong-willed, and Soran always did as he was told, but you could see how devoted they were to each other.
From the minute Soran had asked us if we could get her out of Kurdistan all those years ago, that’s when I knew how much he loved her.
I pulled my car into the car park as we arrived at Finsbury Park. I turned the ignition off and leaned over, meeting Aria’s lips like I’d been missing them.
There was a knock on the window, interrupting me from starting anything else.
“I think we’re wanted,” Aria whispered against my lips.
“How about we lock the doors and forget about the world?”
I’d give anything to do that with her right now. To stay in this moment of just us, nothing pulling at me from a different direction, demanding my full attention.
She kissed me one last time, then stepped out of the car.
I released a heavy breath and followed, making my way around to her. My hand found hers immediately. I wanted to spend every moment with her that I could right now. I’d missed so much with her already.
“Aria, we are going to have so much fun,” Serfina chirped, linking her arm in Aria’s and pulling her from my hand. “Go play with the boys, Sebastian. Aria is with us girls today.”
“Not sure if I like that idea.” I rubbed my fingers over my chin, looking at her.
“Oh, please, go away.” Serfina pushed me playfully. “You can’t keep her all the time.”
I wished it were down to me wanting to keep her all the time, but it wasn’t. It was me trying to get every scrap of time with her that I could.
“Sebastian, gyan. Aria will be fine. Go,” Berevan said firmly.
My eyes met Aria’s, which shimmered at me. “You know where I am if you need me,” I told her, then kissed her forehead.
“I’ll be fine, Sebastian. Go have fun.” She kissed me softly, then turned to face Serfina and Berevan.
They all linked arms and started walking towards the park, but my eyes stayed fixed on her, watching as she disappeared into the crowd and from my view, like I’d lost her.
Hayden placed his hand on my shoulder. “There’ll be a day when you’ll appreciate the peace.”
“Peace from Serfina is always welcome.” I laughed, patting him on the chest. He elbowed me in the side.
They loved each other deeply, but they were funny to watch when Serfina was being feisty with him. That was what he loved about her.
“You know”—Soran joined us from behind—“most days, Berevan gives me a headache, but when she goes away to visit family without me, I miss that headache. There’s not a day that goes by that I couldn’t see her in my life.”
We all laughed and started walking towards the park. There would never be a day I’d be happy without Aria in it. She was a part of me. Bound to my soul forever.
Night had fallen, and the fire was burning bright.
Aria was Kurdish dancing with Berevan and Serfina and some other women.
She looked like she was enjoying herself, laughing with them.
I’d hardly seen her today as she was off exploring the festival.
God, I fucking missed her. Missed being together like we were before I’d gotten back fully into the Organisation.
I rubbed my chest, my heart aching from the thought of not having her in a world that I was in. No. I wouldn’t allow that.
“She’s a lovely woman, Sebastian. It’s rare to find someone so special in life.”
“It feels like I’m losing her,” I confessed, and Soran squeezed my shoulder. “That being back in the Organisation is taking that precious time away that I should be spending with her.”
“You should tell her. Honesty in a relationship is what keeps people together.”
“I can’t. She’d fucking hate me for lying to her for all this time. She’s been through more than anyone should bear in life. I need to protect her from all of this.”
“Maybe you should end it with her.” I glanced over at him. “If you truly want to protect her. This is your life now, Sebastian. Things are different. Everyone will know about her, and do you want to risk her getting hurt? You need to think about doing what’s best for her, not you.”
Was I being selfish, keeping her close to me because I couldn’t bear the thought of losing her? Of not having her in my life?
My phone vibrated in my pocket, and I looked at the screen. Matt’s number flashed up, and I answered.
“Sebastian, we need you and Soran at the warehouse in Bow. Someone’s completely trashed it. They’ve taken my supply.”