17. Chapter 14 - Hillary
“ W hat in the ever-loving feck do you have in this thing?” Lucky complained as he dragged my oversized Louis Vuitton suitcase behind him in the snow as we crossed the driveway to Winter’s home.
I visited every year in January for a weekend to spend some time with my bestie and her family. This year, I had been blessed with an Irish tag-along.
I’d considered canceling, but my little adopted nephew’s birthday party was tomorrow. I didn’t get to be a part of his life nearly enough, and the overwhelming “aunt guilt” had made that choice an imposs ibility.
Kellan was away on FBI business, and he’d made it abundantly clear he would be refusing “babysitting duty” as he called it, from now on.
Aaron, of course, was indisposed at the Palace and, as much as I wanted to dump Lucky off there for the weekend and not have to deal with him, I didn’t trust Aaron not to kill him. Now I knew what Lucky was after in my home, there was no way he was getting the weekend alone at my condo to thieve it from right under my nose.
The man had practically salivated when he saw the Modigliani in the panic room. I already had cursed myself for not making the connection sooner. Of course , he would be after my most valuable possession—Lucky was the most competent thief I’d ever met. Which was saying quite a lot. In my time at Jediah’s parties, I’d met more than a few–it didn’t surprise me he wasn’t after some diamonds or a designer gown—he was going for the grand prize of stolen goods.
Now it was a matter of time; I was confident in my security measures, so I just had to wait until he got himself caught. Although, admittedly, I hadn’t figured out what I was going to do to him when he got stuck in my web.
My dungeon was for predators only; he would not get the same torture treatment my other guests did. Blackbird had informed me, after our little business meeting, she’d been impressed by his plan and his level of knowledge. We were likely going to actually pull this off
So, like it or not, Lucky was far more valuable to me alive than dead, or alive and tortured.
Trading in grays was a daily deal in this life I’d chosen. Shady businessmen, crooked legal teams, manipulative city councils—all par for the course to walk the roads of this world. I was willing to trade Lucky’s duplicity for his skill set if it meant I could take down Alvarez—and, if he did it successfully, I’d take him off my permanent chopping block.
He drove me up the wall most days, but… I liked him.
I d idn’t want to—it would be easier to toss him in a cell if I didn’t. His Irish charm had snared me at Quintessence and despite his childish tendencies, he was cunning, intelligent, and unassuming—the perfect partner in crime if I wasn’t the one he was trying to swindle. His sexier than sin body and captivating eyes were a bonus, but it was his exasperating sense of whimsy and wit that amplified his appeal.
I’d met thousands of people—hundreds of thousands—over the years of rubbing shoulders with Daddy’s circle of influence before I built my own. Hundreds of men and women had tried to seduce me, barter favors from me, lavish me with gifts and praise with nothing of substance beyond their motives.
Maybe it was because I’d known his motives this whole time, but I struggled to see Lucky as an actual threat. He was a cocky mouse, thinking he could mimic the nature of a lion, but I was the lion. Jungle cats weren’t afraid of rodents.
But if I was wrong, and he double-crossed us? Kellan and Aaron could have their turns with him first, then I’d finish him. A fair fight, like Aaron had been gifted, except there wouldn’t be anyone coming to Lucky’s rescue.
So, for now, Lucky would be stuck to my side, away from my priceless paintings and any of the countless ways he could get into trouble. That meant this weekend he was with me.
I didn’t trust him with priceless artwork, but I didn’t see him as a threat to the people I loved. It was a juxtaposition I wasn’t able to explain. Yet.
I had to lean into my gut on this one.
I also had to come up with a cover story for his appearance. I was thankful Winter couldn’t see my face when I’d explained I was bringing the man “I’m seeing.” I refused to use the word ‘boyfriend,’ but it didn’t matter; she’d obnoxiously squealed in my ear with excitement. Then she’ d hollered to the guys I was bringing my boyfriend and they’d “need to behave.”
I could take solace in the fact Shane and Logan were sure to not behave and give Lucky hell. I’d just sit back for the weekend and enjoy the show.
And speak of the devils… As we rounded the corner, the entire goddamned family was waiting at the entrance, not even bothering to hide their curious eyes and smug grins.
“Pay up!” Shane called out as we walked closer. Drew sheepishly shook his head at his husband. We stopped awkwardly in front of our welcome party.
“What was the bet this time?” I cocked an eyebrow in the direction of my least favorite of Winter’s husbands; Shane just winked at me.
“I thought you were covering for Kellan,” Drew admitted, running a hand through his short blond hair as his guilty hazel eyes met mine. “Shane said there was no way he’d be coming without giving the guys a heads up, but I”—his eyes darted behind me to my companion, and he dropped his voice, as if doing so would save Lucky’s feelings—“thought something might have finally clicked with you two. I owe him fifty bucks.”
“’Fraid Kellan still has his head stuck up his arse on that one, mate,” Lucky piped up unhelpfully. He dragged my suitcase to a stop behind him and reached out to Drew to shake his hand. “I’m Lauchlan. Nice to meet you.”
Winter, standing between Travis and Logan with Noble on her hip shyly peering at us from between his fingers, gave Lucky a once over and then mouthed ‘he’s hot,’ before beckoning us into the house. Cam grabbed my suitcase and hoisted it over his shoulder like it was the weight of a pillow; I smirked at Lucky in satisfaction.
Cam was a jacked carpenter now, but he used to be one of the best boxers in the state and still trained regularly. Kellan used to spar with his half-brother, and it was as bloody and erotic as it sounded.
We piled into the front foyer, exchanging hugs and introductory handshakes while I cooed over Noble’s growing form. The little bundle turned one within the week, and as his favorite auntie, I’d brought him his birthday present.
Winter handed Noble off to Travis, and I immediately yanked my best friend into my chest for a tight hug. We’d grown up in Cascade Falls most of our lives, but hadn’t become friends until adulthood. Now, she was my most cherished relationship, and I hated we lived hours apart.
When we were young and dumb, we could have spent years of our time in each other’s company. Now that we had our shit together, we had to relegate our girl time to rare weekends because our lives kept getting in the way. Daily memes and text messages just weren’t enough.
Tears pricked my eyes like they always did when we reunited, and I quickly brushed them into her long auburn hair before pulling away to properly assess her.
Winter looked light years better than my last visit—her postpartum depression appeared finally under control with the right meds and lifestyle changes. Her blue-green eyes sparkled and the smile on her face was relaxed and genuine. I was so grateful she had five good partners taking care of her when I couldn’t.
“Are you guys hungry?” Her eyes shone with love as she glanced over at Logan and Cam. “These two cooked you an authentic Southern meal, and you’re going to want to eat it hot.”
“Since when can you cook?” I pushed Logan’s shoulder affectionately with a smile. He hadn’t cooked a single meal in all the time I’d known him; before he was married—to Winter, not me—he’d lived off catered salads and gourmet takeout.
“Since everyone in this house kept giving me shit,” Logan retorted. Winter ushered us into the huge eat-in kitchen at the rear of the house.
As promised, a spread fit for a queen was laid out on the harvest table, and I gladly took a seat. I rarely indulged in high-fat, salty foods, but Cam’s cooking was impossible to say no to.
“So, how did you two meet?” Travis asked over dinner. Winter’s most charming husband flashed one of his bright smiles; kind, curious green eyes authentically wanted the story.
Well, this one would be easy to answer, at least.
“Quintessence, funnily enough.” I snuck a glance at Lucky, who had grabbed a seat at the end of the table next to the highchair, and had taken to playing with Noble—who was squishing the remains of his buttered biscuits into his hair. “He had the balls to hit on me when your uncle stood me up.”
“Kellan is one brave fucker.” Shane flicked his long, dark braid over his shoulder. His storm gray eyes flashed with amusement before he shoved a huge helping of potatoes into his mouth.
“Hold up.” Lucky’s attention turned from the miniature food fight Noble had started to Travis. “Kellan is your uncle ?”
Travis shifted in his seat, looking uncomfortable, but he didn’t dodge the question. “It’s complicated, but yeah.” He waved a hand toward Cam, who sat on the opposite side of the table. “We’re both related to Kellan. It’s a fucked up family tree.”
Lucky’s gaze flicked back and forth between Travis and Cam, as if searching for the family resemblance. There wasn’t any; Cam was dark-skinned, with brilliant blue eyes and close-cropped hair; Travis was white, albeit nicely tanned, with wavy black hair and green eyes.
Before Lucky could ask another question, Travis quickly switched the subject. “Has Jeremy made you my latest?” he asked eagerly.
I h ad to smile at his enthusiasm. Travis oversaw the entire bar operation across their five locations, and the signature drinks were his creations.
“You know I only drink dirty martinis, Trav, but I’m sure it's delicious.” I turned to Lucky to at least fill him in. “These guys own Quintessence and their four affiliate clubs.”
“That’s grand!” His sea-glass eyes lit up with interest. “Love it there. Reminds me of Artesian Bar in London.”
“Really!?” Winter beamed excitedly at Logan, who returned her smile with a confident smirk of his own. “That’s the restaurant we modeled it after! That’s literally the best praise.” She tossed me a wide smile; Lucky had her immediate approval.
Logan flashed an all-too-familiar cocky grin at his wife. “And whose idea was that?” He taunted cheekily, sipping his tonic water. “You know the best ones are all mine.”
“Definitely not,” Shane disagreed, buttering another roll idly while cocking a disbelieving brow at Logan. “Lava Cake Sundays were my idea. If you ate chocolate and had taste buds, you’d know what we’re talking about.”
“I cooked this meal, didn’t I?” Logan shot back, pointing his fork accusingly in Shane’s direction.
“ I cooked this meal,” Cam said, matching Logan’s challenging stare. “You prepped the carrots and potatoes. A monkey can do that.”
Drew, Cam, and Winter joined in, and the six of them were soon chattering back and forth over who in the family contributed the most brains to their operation, and what actually classified as cooking. Lucky and I watched on with amusement; the overwhelming feeling of having dinner in a happy home settled contentedly in my gut.
Shane broke off from the chatter and reached across the table for another helping of glazed carrots, tossing a wink at my smug companion. “You’re in now, man. You’ve just made her day.”
My heart sunk a little into my chest at the way Winter had grinned at Lucky, the lie sitting heavy in my stomach. I hated concealing yet another thing from her, but the clusterfuck that was my life was far too complicated to get into right now. One day, I hoped to confess all of my sins, knowing she would forgive me for every one of them; I would never forgive myself if her family was harmed in my crossfire.
I understood Kellan’s motives for keeping his distance from his family, even when I knew how much they meant to him. But I had a seat at his table. And we drank from the same cup of poison made from the blood of our enemies. His distance from me wasn’t warranted, and I wouldn’t put up with that bullshit narrative much longer.
The rest of dinner continued and the usual chatter and banter of Winter’s crew was a balm to my heart. They’d just gotten back from their Christmas vacation abroad—the annual gift I’d given them since they’d gotten married a few years ago. I loved hearing about their adventures in the Costa Rican jungle or in the outback of Australia; it was a treat to give Winter something where she could make lasting memories surrounded by the people she loved.
These men took such good care of her, and tonight, my beautiful best friend radiated contentment.
I swatted at the zing of jealousy that shot up my spine, wondering what being content would feel like. Would I find it pleasantly peaceful, or debilitating and boring? Would I even recognize the emotion, or would I unwittingly destroy it with more chaos, not understanding what it was?
Controlled chaos was my nature. Contented calm was as foreign to me as ancient Aramaic.
“How old is this little man this weekend?” Lucky asked, playing dumb as Travis and Shane stood to clear our plates from the table.
“Almost a year.” Drew ruffled the baby’s butter-crusted hair affectionately. Noble spit a drooly wad of potato at him, and gi ggled at the sound. The goopy slop landed with a squelching plop.
“Alright, little man,” Lucky bent down to eye level in front of the highchair, risking a potato spit kiss in the eye to speak to the devil. He held up the brightly colored plastic spoon. “Now yeh see it”—with a flash of his hands, the spoon disappeared from view—“now you don’t!”
Noble shrieked with glee and clapped his hands wildly at the amateur trick, a fit of giggles erupting from his little belly.
“Ah, you like that one, do yeh?” The redheaded magician caught me staring at him and flashed me a thousand-watt smile. “Looks like I impressed your auntie, too. Want to see it again?”
Snorting, I shook my head and stood to help clean the pots. Lucky continued his antics, and loud cackles erupted from the little boy’s lips every few minutes.
“He’s great with kids,” Winter murmured as we stood side by side at the sink, her washing, me drying, satisfied to simply be in each other’s company. “Is he—you know—a serious contender?”
“Are you asking if he’s a contender as my second husband, or to have children with?” I snagged a sip of my wine in between dries, arching a brow at her. “Because the answer to both of them is no.”
“No?” Her lips quirked up at the corners as if choking off a smirk.
“No,” I repeated, downing the last gulp of Sauvignon Blanc and returning to my task. “Lucky is fun, but that’s the extent of it—and I’m never having children.”
“She’s right, love.” The heat of Lucky’s chest pressed against my back as he circled his arms around me in a loose hold.
Eavesdropping bastard. The guys must have taken Noble away to get cleaned up. “I am a lot of fun, but that’s really all I’m good for. And I had a vasectomy at 20, so I’m not champing at the bit for a redo.”
Huh. That was an interesting nugget of information. When I mentioned I had no interest in being a mother, most men tried to mansplain all the reasons I’d regret it, even going so far as to tell me I’d change my mind in a few years.
I wouldn’t. I loved being an Auntie, but that was where my maternal instinct ended. To hear Lucky felt the same? The acknowledgment shouldn’t stir any reaction from me, but I felt a tug of something in my belly regardless.
Indigestion from the pound of butter I’d just consumed. The only logical explanation.
Winter’s expression was curious, but she didn’t push it. Lucky gently released me to nudge her out of the way from the sink, taking her place beside me.
“I’ll earn my keep, love.”
Rolling up his shirt sleeves, he dropped his hands into the hot soapy water and started scrubbing. Winter shot me another weighted look of approval and I made a face of exasperation before grabbing the sudsy plate from Lucky’s hand.
“You never told me she had five husbands,” he mused quietly while we finished our menial task. I waited for him to continue, but he just let the statement linger in the air between us.
“I didn’t,” I acknowledged and placed the last batch of cutlery back in the drawer. “Does it matter?”
Drying his hands on the dish towel, he turned around to lean against the sink and folded his arms across his chest. His brows arched in interest.
“Is that what you’re planning with Mr. Roboto and Conan?” His tone was casual, but his eyes were alight with amusement. “Did I walk into some polyamorous support club?”
He was teasing, but the words struck a chord in me. My plan… all of my plans for years involved bringing down bad people b y doing bad things and building an empire to help fund my mission. Nothing else mattered.
I didn’t have a plan—I couldn’t even find the words to explain what I was doing. With Aaron, with Kellan, with my attraction to him. I was taking this fucked up scenario three steps at a time, throwing a lot of money and the risk of incarceration at a problem I was desperate to solve. That was the extent of my life plan .
I released a long sigh; the breath left through my lips in a soft hiss. I didn’t filter my response, choosing to be forthright instead of engaging in our usual dance of phony words.
“Lucky, when Alvarez is long gone, I’ll figure out what I’m doing with the rest of my life. Right now, I’m just treading water, okay?”
His forehead wrinkled in concern, but no witty retort came. If I’d known a bit of honesty could make this man shut up…
Abruptly, he reached for me, pulling me by the shoulders toward him. He pressed a soft kiss to my forehead like we were seasoned lovers seeking comfort from each other.
“Roger that.” When his eyes met mine, for a moment, I fell under their lulling spell. Their normally glowing radiance was a softly storming sea. Then just as quickly, he broke its magic. “Let’s go find our room, ya?”
Right. Our room. We were here together , which meant we would share a room tonight. Luckily, the guest room—my room—had a settee. Lucky would sleep there. The king bed wasn’t big enough for the two of us.
“Hill!” Winter hollered from the living room. “Stop making out and come play Balderdash.”
“I fecking love Balderdash!” Lucky exclaimed. He dropped my hands like they were on fire and strolled toward the alcove leading to the next room. He turned expectantly. “Yeh coming, Blondie?”
I r olled my eyes at his puppy-like enthusiasm but I fell in step beside him, ready to immerse myself some more in the love and laughter of my friends.
I needed a reminder of all the good in this world before I gave my soul over to the dark.