59. Naina
Chapter Fifty-Nine
NAINA
Can I turn on location sharing on your phone so I know where you are at all times?
I’m finding divorce lawyers right now.
When I woke up the next morning, it was with the lightest feeling in my chest, like I was a feather about to float away.
The revelations of last night were a lot, but I wasn’t going to let them weigh on me.
Maybe our love was different than what most people expected. But we were utterly devoted to each other.
I didn’t even care that our relationship was never meant to be fake or temporary.
Whether that was the Stockholm Syndrome talking or something else, I didn’t care .
How many people could say that their partner was obsessed with them?
Devoted to their every breath?
At the end of the day, I knew Kash.
I was the only one who did.
He gave himself to me completely, just as I was choosing to give myself to him.
Turning over in bed, I stretched, feeling across to the other side of the mattress, and finding it empty. I groaned.
Why couldn’t he just sleep-in one day?
Sitting up, I pushed back my hair and saw Kash sitting at the dining table, his laptop open in front of him.
“Good morning,” I croaked.
He glanced up, his smile so brilliant it rivalled the sun.
“Good morning, sweetheart. We have family brunch in one hour and while I wouldn’t mind you showing up in nothing but my shirt, the others might take offence.”
I fell back onto the bed.
“As if I care what your family thinks.”
“They’re your family now, too,” Kash reminded me.
“Ugh, don’t remind me. I only signed up for you, and Vera is a nice bonus.”
Still, I slid out of bed and walked into the bathroom to get ready.
I picked a one shouldered summer dress, white with large red flowers printed on it. I pulled my hair into a ponytail because I just couldn’t be bothered and only applied sunscreen, a tinted moisturizer and red lipstick.
“Shouldn’t this feel different?”
I walked out into the living room with five minutes to spare.
“Should what feel different?”
“Being in love. Being married.”
Did I look different?
“We’ve been married for almost two months now. As for the love part…” Kash looked up at me. “How do you feel?”
“Happy,” I said immediately. “Safe.”
The darkness that chased me through my dreams disappeared a long time ago.
Suddenly, the prospect of returning to California and renovating the Windfield didn’t fill with me with guilt and dread.
I’d made mistakes, and I would always carry those around.
But now I had Kash to walk with me.
Kash nodded thoughtfully. “Me, too. I’ve always felt safe with you.”
I leaned over, kissing him lightly.
We walked out of the room with my hand in his, and then down to a smaller ballroom where the family was gathered.
I didn’t know why I thought it was just going to be the immediate family, as in his father, stepmother, Vera’s mother and stepfather.
But apparently, family brunch included all the distance relatives as well.
Edward and Diana were nowhere to be seen.
I was surprised to see Ava and Augusta, though.
“Kash,” Ava cried, enveloping him into a hug. She kissed both his cheeks before turning to me and hugging me as well.
“What is going on? What was so urgent you called me here?” Ava asked, looking up at my husband. “Does your father know?”
“You’ll find out, Mom.”
Augusta sidled up to us.
“Naina, darling, you look gorgeous,” she said. “Kassius, you look happy. I almost didn’t recognize you.”
“He does look happy.” Ava beamed at her son, but her smile dropped as soon as Vera’s mom, Amelia, walked up to us.
“Kash, what’s going on? Why did you call this brunch? Where’s Edward?”
Wait, Kash called this brunch?
I thought it was another requirement.
Instead of answering, Kash walked us further into the room. Picking up a fork, he tinged it against a glass, bringing everyone’s attention to us.
“You’re all waiting for my father to join us and make another speech about traditions and perfection. Well, I hope you’ve memorized them by now because you won’t be hearing any more of them. My father is gone. He officially retired last night and signed over all his assets to me.”
He paused when everyone in the room gasped, looking at each other in question. His words sent me reeling.
Edward retired?
Somehow, I found it hard to believe he gave up everything.
“Now don’t think that just because he’s gone you’re free to do whatever the fuck pleases you,” Kash continued. “I don’t trust a single one of you, and everyone one of you is going to be under scrutiny. My mother and Aunt Auggie are members of this family, and they will remain members of this family unless they decide otherwise.”
Silence met his speech, and I looked around, a little shell-shocked. My eyes met Vera’s wide ones, my expression mirrored on her face.
Good to know I wasn’t the only one who was completely floored.
Had Edward really given up his position this easily?
“Edward wouldn’t just leave ,” Amelia protested.
“Well, he did,” Kash said. “If you have a problem, you’re welcome to join him.”
The others remained silent.
There were so many people in this room I didn’t even know. My…family, because they were Kash’s family.
Would I ever actually get to meet them?
“And he left you everything?” A middle-aged man questioned. He looked a lot like Kash’s father, only his hair was completely white whereas Edward’s was more salt and pepper.
“I would have inherited it all one day,” Kash said calmly. “We just sped up the process. Hey, if you don’t want me to have it, I can always give everything to Vera.”
Amelia gasped, covering her mouth.
Kash grinned wolfishly while Vera rolled her eyes at her mother’s dramatics.
“If you think I’m going to be a menace, you don’t know what Vera is going to do. I can tolerate you people, but she despises you, as she should.”
“This is bullshit.” This from a man who was about our age.
“Fuck off, Will,” Vera said. “Nobody cares about your opinion. Go play with Leslie.”
Will’s cheeks colored in anger.
I eyed him and maybe I was biased, but if he was the one Leslie cheated on Kash with, then she downgraded.
Who the hell would cheat on Kash Sutherland?
Forget the money, the man was a treasure trove on his own.
“Vera,” Amelia admonished.
“I think we’re done here,” Kash said.
With that, he walked towards Ava, who stared at him in surprise. He leaned down to kiss her cheek.
“Thanks for coming, Mom. I’m going to take Naina out for brunch because she’s leaving today, but you and I can have dinner.”
Ava nodded. “Of course, mijo .”
“I love you, mom,” Kash whispered.
Ava smiled up at him brilliantly. “I love you, too.”
Turning to me, she pulled me into a hug. I breathed in the scent of her perfume, swallowing back my tears.
“Thank you,” she whispered in my ear.
I waited until we were out of the hotel to speak up.
“Your father’s gone!?”
“He’s gone.”
Kash looked back at Grayson, and he nodded in confirmation.
“He just gave you everything and left,” I said.
“He had no choice.”
We crossed the street to the bridge, looking down at the Chicago River. It was a beautiful summer day. The sun was out, beating down on us. Below us, boats were conducting tours. Someone jogged past us, and Kash pulled me to the other side of him, away from the road.
“My father had been preparing me for this day my whole life,” Kash said. “Except in my mind I thought him invincible and like he was never going to die, so I would never really be CEO and head of the family.”
“What changed?”
Kash looked down at me.
“I realized I couldn’t live in fear anymore. My father wasn’t invincible, he was just monstrous. He was using everyone I loved against me. That’s why I never wanted to get married. The day I decided I wanted you was the day I knew I had to get rid of him.”
The more I learned about his father, the more I hated the man.
I asked Kash the one question I doubted anyone else would.
“Are you happy?”
Kash remained silent for a long time.
“This was never the life I wanted because I thought I would have to traverse it alone, or with someone like Crystal or Leslie. Even then, I would still be alone. I’m not saying they’re wrong, they weren’t right for me.”
He pulled us to a stop, looking down at me. A breeze ruffled his hair, and I reached up, brushing it back.
“I can give you the world, Naina. You don’t even have to ask and I will lay it at your feet,” he said. “The one thing I can’t give you is freedom. It might make me selfish and monstrous, but I need you too much, and I won’t give you up.”
Maybe this should all scare me.
The idea of really, truly being Mrs. Sutherland and what it meant.
The fact was, I didn’t fall in love with a name.
I fell in love with a man, and he was so much more than the name he carried.
We’d already established last night that I was just as obsessed with him as he was with me.
“What makes you think I would ever give you up? You’re mine, Kash Sutherland. Nothing is going to change that.”
Kash closed his eyes, breathing out. “Thank fuck.”
I laughed as we continued walking. I wasn’t sure where he was taking me, though I was sure I just guaranteed he could lead me anywhere and I would happily follow.
We only walked a couple of blocks before Kash led me up the steps of a restaurant. From the way the manager scrambled to get us the best seat in the place, I assumed Kash came here a lot.
“Have you been here before?” I asked.
“No, but I heard the chef is French. Great crepes.”
He sat in the chair adjacent to me.
The menu was in French, which I didn’t read or speak.
Luckily, Kash did and when the server appeared next to us, Kash ordered us mimosas and a crepe filled with an omelet, cheese, mushrooms and roasted red peppers.
Hearing him speak French had heat licking at my body.
“Something has been bothering me,” I said.
Kash looked up at me in question.
“You said you came to the Windfield for me. How did you know where to find me?”
When we met, I told him my name was Marigold because he was just a stranger to me.
Over the night, he had shortened it to Goldie.
Other than that, I didn’t give him any personal information that would have made it easy for him to find me.
Kash took a sip of his water, stalling for time.
“I knew where you were the whole time. Even in New York. You said you attended Harvard, and all it took was a simple search of the database to find you.”
My mouth dropped open, and something else occurred to me.
“Wait, is that how you knew Kat’s apartment? You’ve been stalking me for five years!?”
He scoffed. “It’s not stalking. I do have a job, you know. It’s more like being spatially aware of your presence.”
Unbelievable.
“Stalking,” I said. “I really did marry my stalker.”
Kash gave me a dry look.
“Baby, if I was truly stalking you, I would have gotten rid of your boss, and any other man, who so much as came near you. I gave you your space, and I waited patiently. Don’t think I wasn’t hurt that you didn’t want to date me, but you dated that asshole.”
My cheeks heated at that.
“It wasn’t like that. He was just extremely good at manipulation, and I wasn’t technically dating him. We only went on a couple of dates, and had sex once.”
Kash made a face of disgust.
“Honestly, I kept hoping that you would find me one day, and I felt stupid for even considering it.” I chewed on the inside my cheek thoughtfully.
“Do you think it’s strange we became this enamored with each other after one night?”
Kash ran his hand over my ponytail, brushing it off my shoulder.
“If it was one night, why were you disappointed that I didn’t remember you?”
Because it was the best night of my life, and I fell in love with him, even if I didn’t know it then. The answer must have been obvious, because Kash nodded.
“It wasn’t just one night, baby. It was the beginning of our story.”
The server appeared next to us, carrying our food. As they set down the plates, they cast surreptitious glances at Kash.
“He says such pretty things, doesn’t he?” I said.
The server blushed, even though they nodded in agreement.
“You’re lucky. I just got dumped. Let me know if there’s anything else I can get for you.”
I grabbed my napkin and laid it out on my lap. When I started to dig into my food, I found Kash looking me expectantly.
“Everything okay?”
“I’m waiting for you to acknowledge how mindful and respectful I was, leaving you alone for five years. You said your priority was your family, and I respected that.”
I rolled my lips between my teeth to keep myself from laughing.
“What do you want, a gold star?”
“Actually, yes. I want the credit for leaving you alone so the next time you question if you have autonomy, I can point to this very moment.”
I rested my chin on my hand.
“Thank you for respecting my wishes, Kash. I know that was extremely hard for you,” I said dryly.
Kash set down his coffee up. His eyes were light today, and I didn’t mean the color. The shadows and burden he always carried around was missing. Whatever he did to get Edward to leave, he was really, truly gone now.
I put my hand over his.
Kash looked at me in question.
“You’ll tell me if it gets too much, won’t you? I know you can’t share everything, but this isn’t a burden you have to carry alone.”
His eyes softened, mouth lifting into a smile.
“When my father said he wanted me to marry Crystal, I knew that she wouldn’t be able to handle being by my side because this family would swallow her whole. I’ve always known that you were the only one who could stand with me.”
He swallowed, looking out the window for a moment.
“I’ve always wanted to give you your freedom because I saw what this family would do to you. I realize now that I can’t do that, I was never capable of it. It’s why I had to remove my father from power.”
I never would have guessed Kash did all this for me.
“What would your father have done?”
Kash’s eyes shifted back to me, and I regretted asking that question because the shadows were back.
“My father was responsible for your accident.”
I pulled away from Kash in surprise, my eyes moving back and forth between his.
“What?”
“You shouldn’t have spoken to him at brunch, Naina. That was all it took because he saw that I loved you. My father is only alive because death would have been a mercy. His punishment is obscurity, and watching SFV thrive without him dragging it down.”
Kash brushed his thumb over my cheek.
“I will keep you safe,” he vowed.
I believed him, I did. It was just a lot of information all at once.
Hate was such a small word for what I felt towards Edward, for everything he had done to Kash.
“I will keep you safe,” I vowed.
Kash smiled, his cheeks tinting a soft red.
I promised myself I would always keep that smile on his face.
We would fight, and argue, and snark at each other like every couple. But I would always tell him that I loved him. That he was safe with me.
Because that’s what Kash had given me.