Chapter Ten
Thursday
Of course, all night did have to end, and I awoke at a habitually early hour, exhausted beyond measure yet elated.
My eyelids dragged down from sleepiness despite the soothing light of the star lamp, accidentally left on after our sexual revelry. Alex was fast asleep, the peace in her visage so sweet to behold.
In my haze, I kissed her lightly on the cheek, gratified when she turned toward it.
I rolled over and let myself drift back to sleep….
But not for long. I wasn’t suited for sleeping in.
Though still exhausted, I rose and felt around for my phone, uncertain if I’d even brought it up here, but found it in the pocket of my discarded robe.
6:56 AM. One unread message from Mom:
Be safe. Text me in the morning so I know you’re still alive. Don’t forget about dinner tonight
I gathered myself back together enough to put the robe on, then groggily walked to the bathroom—which did, in fact, feature yet another incredible shower set-up.
I snapped a selfie with the message: Still alive I’ll be at dinner.
And sent it on.
On one hand, I knew Alex wasn’t an early morning person. On the other, she arrived pretty consistently around 8 AM ready for the day, so she wouldn’t sleep in too late. I left her for the moment, wandering downstairs in search of caffeine.
Mabel glanced up from her nap, meowing cutely as she acted as my escort to the kitchen. If nothing else, I absolutely adored the cat and happily placed a kiss on her head when she jumped up onto the counter and headbutted me.
Alex wasn’t exactly a coffee connoisseur, but she had to be an energy drink-type, right? There had to be something stashed away in her kitchen.
But to my absolute appall, there, on the counter, was an espresso machine.
And not just any. A really fucking nice one.
Curious, I switched on the light and took note of the accessories around it, notably the frother, the collection of expensive creamers, the stash of beans in the cupboard beside it—
My jaw dropped.
There had to be an explanation. Fortunately, I heard her rustling around upstairs.
I took a seat at the little bistro, stroking Mabel like a supervillain as Alex entered the room. “Good morning, sleepy,” I said, fighting both my grin and my appall. “You have some explaining to do.”
She looked so stupid in her maroon robe and sleep-ridden eyes as her brain visibly computed both my presence and the question. “Am I in trouble?”
“I haven’t decided.” I stood and released Mabel, then gestured toward the admittedly cute coffee station, though the fact that she even had what one could call a coffee station was quite condemning. “What’s this?”
Alex looked so endearingly confused. “Coffee bar.”
“Pretty good coffee too. Whole beans, even. Fancy grinder, frother, a very nice espresso machine….” I turned my judgement onto her. “A funny thing for someone who orders black coffee with espresso to own.”
Alex grimaced as realization settled upon her countenance. She leaned against the arch leading to the kitchen. “I may have better taste in coffee than you think.”
Was I mad? I hadn’t decided yet. “Go on.”
“Having you notice me because I had the world’s stupidest coffee order was better than you not noticing me at all.”
I was suddenly speechless.
Alex gazed at the floor. “After Chiara pulled me out of my depression hellpit, I didn’t feel much of anything, until I walked into your shop one morning because I’d left my to-go mug at home and saw you.
You were this angel behind the counter with your beautiful hair and your eyes…
. I was smitten. It was the first time I’d felt something since leaving the hospital. I hope that’s not weird to admit.”
I shook my head, my heart already softening.
“You barely noticed me,” she continued. “You were just doing your job. So I came back the next day, determined to get your attention, but it was in the middle of a rush. My brilliant, genius plan was to order the worst drink possible and see how you reacted.” Alex smiled, finally looking up at me.
“You were so offended. I knew I’d blown my shot with you, but I couldn’t not come back.
You were…God, I hope this isn’t creepy, but on my bad days, you got me out of bed in the morning.
The hope of having a ten-second interaction with you was enough to keep me moving when I had nothing else.
I never expected anything to come from it.
You were just part of my routine, like seeing the sunrise every morning.
” A pause; she smiled softer than starlight.
“You never expect the sunrise to love you back.”
Slightly creepy, if I hadn’t been into it. Touching, because I was. Also, she’d managed to compare me to a sunrise in the cheesiest way possible, and my heart was brimming. “You suffered through shit coffee over me for two years?”
Alex scoffed. “You think I finished that god-awful thing?”
My own laughter matched hers as I rose and took her into my arms. “I promise to be an ass to you even if you order something decent.”
“Sorry our whole relationship is based on a lie,” Alex replied, though her tone was clearly in jest.
“I think we’ll grow past it.” I kissed her, the stale taste of morning breath a small price to pay for domestic bliss.
When I pulled back, she kept me bundled in an embrace. “So what’s the schedule today?” Alex asked. “You’re welcome to stay, but I understand if you need clothes. And, you know, there’s this fancy dinner place I think could be fun to take you to. Assuming you want to spend the night again.”
Her gaze held hope. Every part of me yearned to say yes, but one regret remained.
It must’ve shown on my face with how hers fell.
“I want to,” I said, my words coming rapidly, “but tonight my mom is actually going to be home, and she’s never home for dinner.
She was really looking forward to it, and I can’t just… . You get it, right?”
Her expression softened. “I do. Tomorrow, maybe?”
“Definitely tomorrow.” I winced, though, to remember something else. “You’ll need to drop me off at the coffee shop so I can get my bike home. It’s still there.
Alex shook her head. “I bought a bike rack.”
“What?!” I leaned back, trapped by her arms. “Alex, you shouldn’t have.”
“It’s the least I can do.”
I wanted to argue. I wanted to fight her goodwill. Instead, I set my head on her shoulder, allowing myself to be doted on. “Thank you,” I whispered.
I really was something of a feral beast, still frightened by kindness. But Alex simply planted a kiss in my hair. “I like taking care of you.”
I had no response, just a stirring of deep affection inside me. “I can stay until then though, if you’ll have me. I’m sure we can think of something to do.”
“Well, let me prove that I can make good coffee,” Alex teased. “And then…yeah, we’ll think of something.”
I kissed her deeply this time, savoring the brewing anticipation.
Once evening neared, Alex set up the bike rack on her sports car, the device somehow not requiring any actual drilling.
“No harm done, see?” she said, though I still struggled to process the kindness of the gesture.
It was all so much. So new. So perfect.
Evening had settled when we finally arrived at my apartment, bike in tow.
I remained still as she first unloaded the bike, then went around to my door, heart fluttering as she opened it and offered me a hand.
I dared to keep a hold of it as she led me to my door.
We stopped on the welcome mat, our mutual hesitation palpable.
“Tomorrow, right?” I asked.
“Tomorrow. How about 5 for dinner? I’ll pick you up here.”
“Yeah.” My cheeks hurt from smiling, sore from entertaining this growing, beautiful feeling. I hadn’t felt so brave in years. “So, when I tell my mom about you, do I call you Alex or do I call you my girlfriend?”
Alex’s eyes sparkled as they reflected the setting sun. “I kinda like the sound of that second one.”
She bridged the space between us, our lips meeting in the center. More chaste than most of our other kisses, but there was something more to it, a stability I’d hidden from for so long. This was real, as real as anything I’d felt since El.
And I had no doubt, bittersweet as it was, that if El had any awareness from the afterlife, she’d want this for me too.
The time would come to tell Alex about El. For now, I focused on the bliss filling me as we kissed on the doorstep. How long had it been since I’d felt safe in someone’s arms? A few years too many, at least—
“Oh!”
I broke from the kiss, then recoiled to see my mom’s startled figure not ten feet away, laden with groceries. “Mom! Hi!”
Alex recovered smoothly, fearlessly swooping in to help my mother. “Allow me, Mrs. Stern,” she said, taking one of the gallons of milk my mom tried to balance along with the bags.
Mom looked somewhat taken aback, though not unhappy. “Terra, care to tell me who this dashing grocery thief is?”
I rushed forward, pulled from my stupor, and took a bag from her arm. “Mom, this is my girlfriend, Alex.”
Mom’s expression tried to soften, but some lingering confusion caused her to furrow her brow. “Well, let’s get these inside so I can meet you properly, Alex.”
I unlocked the door, allowing everyone else passage. Thankfully, it was all clean, no pile-up of dishes in the sink, so while it was certainly dingier than anything Alex had ever lived in, it wasn’t entirely embarrassing.
Alex helped Mom with the groceries. “You’ll be amused to know, Alex,” Mom began as she organized everything on the counter, “that just a few days ago, Terra was being hedgy about the fact that she was seeing someone.”
I blushed. Things had progressed quickly, but when it was right, it was right. Right? “We’ve done a lot of talking since then,” I replied.
“Talking, sure. Like you were doing on the doorstep.” Mom’s knowing look left me withering, but she returned to studying Alex, that confusion returning. “Well, I have to do the obligatory Mom interrogation. Sorry, hun. Are you in school?”
“Graduated. Bachelor’s in Business from Cornell.”