Chapter 13
B eth motioned to the brick colonial two-story at the end of a cul-de-sac. “That’s where I grew up.”
Kane surveyed the quiet suburban street. “Your house has the best Christmas lights on the block.”
“It does.” Green garland with red berries outlined the porch and the garage. Two lit-up lofty pine trees sat on either side of the porch steps with large, colorful presents underneath. Lush wreaths with deep-red bows matching the red shutters and door hung from every window. She pointed to the sled and reindeer on the roof. “My father was pretty excited about those new additions.”
“They are damn cool. My dad used to put a giant Santa on the barn roof when we were kids.”
“Was the barn red?”
He pulled a photo from the sun visor and handed it to her. “Yup, and full of horses, including my sweet girl.”
“Oh my God, Kane, she’s gorgeous.” Beth stared at the huge, glossy black mare standing in front of a red barn with a wreath around her neck and a Santa hat perched between her ears. “She’s the prettiest animal I’ve ever seen. What’s her name?”
His grin brightened the cloudy day. “Holly Jolly, because she was born on Christmas Eve.”
“I knew you liked Christmas as much as I do.” She wagged the photo at him.
He snatched it from her hand and tucked it into the visor. “Don’t tell the guys I dressed up my horse.”
“Ooh, Kane has a secret.” She shimmied her shoulders in her seat. “I’ll be keeping that tidbit in my back pocket for the next time you piss me off.”
“Great.” He rolled his eyes. “I’ll make you a deal. You keep your mouth shut and I’ll take you to West Virginia and give you a riding lesson once this is over.”
“And let me drive the Buick?”
“Don’t push it, sugarplum.” He held out his hand. “Do we have a deal?”
She placed her palm in his and shook. Driving the Buick would be fun, but seeing him astride a horse in tight jeans and his hat under a big blue sky was worth conceding her request. “Did you ever ride rodeo?” Her mouth watered at the thought of him in chaps on a bucking bull.
“A bit, but not competitively.” He pulled into the drive and turned off the engine. “I watched too many friends be taken away in ambulances. I played it safe and ran track.”
And now a vision of Kane in running shorts, sweat pouring down his shirtless torso as he circled the red barn, had another part of her body wet.
He rubbed his thigh. “Good thing my bones were in one piece when they were blown to hell.”
Pain flashed in his eyes as he scanned the street. Sometimes, like when he was talking about things that deepened his dimples so much they overflowed with joy, she forgot she wasn’t the only one who’d suffered and been left with scars .
Following his gaze, she studied the area around her parent’s place. Was her stalker lying in wait behind her neighbor’s giant blow-up reindeer? Or maybe Chavez took cover on the other side of the house behind Rita and Jerry’s life-size Santa village. Rita would have a fit if someone shot a hole in one of the jolly elves.
Kane reached into the back seat. “What’s so funny?”
“Nothing.” She eyed the gift bag in his hands. “What are those?”
He smiled and winked as he pulled out two red tins. “One is something for us to enjoy. The other is to thank your parents for having me. They can open it when they get home.”
“That’s not necessary.” But damn, it was respectful and sweet.
He opened his door and slid his leg out. “Where I come from, it is.”
Oh no, there was that country boy charm her parents would love. Good thing they weren’t around to hear him compliment their Christmas lights and witness him acting all gentlemanly. They’d get excited she’d finally brought someone home and she didn’t want to disappoint them.
She twisted in her seat to follow his movements. With efficient strides, he walked around to her side of the truck and opened the door. Cold air whipped in, and she shivered. The temperature had dropped considerably since they’d left the liquor store.
He held out his hand. “Come on. Let’s get you inside before it snows.”
She took it and sniffed the air. “It sure smells like it’s going to snow but it’s not supposed to start until later.”
He cupped her elbow and guided her around the car. As they approached the steps, he dipped his head to her ear. “I bet when this place is lit up at night and the snow is falling, it’s as sparkly as you are.”
“I’m going to take that as a compliment.”
“You should.”
He nudged the collar of her coat with his nose as he lifted his head. She could swear he sniffed her hair.
“Beth, is that you?”
Kane tensed as she spun to the familiar voice. She laid her hand on his arm. “Relax, it’s just my neighbor.”
She waved to the elderly woman peering at them from the edge of the porch next door. “Hi Rita. Merry Christmas.”
“Hi dear. Who’s that with you?”
“I’m Kane, Beth’s boyfriend.” He tipped his cowboy hat. “Pleased to meet you, ma’am.”
Rita’s delighted laugh carried across the snow-crusted lawn. “The pleasure is all mine, handsome.”
Sweet Jesus, that man could charm the pants off anybody. Except her. Her pants needed to stay buttoned up tight.
“Do we really need to pretend we’re a couple in front of the neighbors?” Beth whispered.
“Yes.” He dropped a kiss to her forehead. “Nic’s buddies reported they didn’t find any bugs earlier, but that doesn’t mean someone won’t try and tap into your parents’ network.” He waved to Rita once more as he guided Beth up the steps. “It’s best if we make everyone in town believe I’m head over heels for you instead of here to protect your cute ass.”
She tilted her head as she punched the security code into a console. “Cute ass? That’s not very professional.”
“Stop making my job harder by arguing and let us inside. And once we’re in there, you don’t leave without me, or I’ll put you over my knee and make your cute ass as red as this door, darling.”
She snapped her head so hard her neck twinged. “ You wouldn’t dare.”
“Try me.” Kane didn’t wait for a response as he nudged Beth over the threshold. As he closed the door behind them, he blocked Gran’s nonsense about Beth being the one for him and chalked up the inappropriate conversation he’d initiated to simple lust. Taking in the layout of the house didn’t calm his throbbing need for a taste of Beth. Not when the place glittered as brightly as she did.
A tall Christmas tree with heavy boughs that jutted out at odd angles stood in the corner. Fragile-looking ornaments nestled alongside homemade treasures hung from the boughs. Piled logs in the fireplace hearth waited for a match.
Beth flipped a switch by the door. Just like in her townhome, hundreds of tiny white lights lit the room like a winter wonderland. The scent of pine and the warm, cozy glow whisked him away on a bittersweet sleigh ride back to his parents’ house when he was a kid. His mother used to go all out with decorations too. In the days leading up to Christmas, she’d hide Gran’s sugarplums around the kitchen for Livvie and him to find when they came home from school. Even as a churlish teenager, he’d appreciated her efforts right until the year her enthusiasm for anything, including him and Livvie, died along with his father.
Were Nic’s buddy’s kids enjoying Christmas in the wake of their mother being gunned down and their father too grief-stricken to care for them? Kane shook his head at the stupid question.
For years, he’d hated Christmas. Hated seeing his mother’s decorations intermingled with Grans. But on a snowy December 24th, while he was home on leave, his father’s mare gave birth to Holly Jolly. While Kane thought Gran’s sixth-sense claims were ridiculous, he sometimes allowed himself to believe that the horse was a gift from his dad. Maybe a message to stop being a surly Scrooge and enjoy the holidays with his family. Sometimes, he got angry his mom hadn’t received a sign to help deal with her loss. Most of the time he didn’t believe in gifts or signs at all. When someone was gone, they were gone with no way to comfort the living.
He looked at Beth, mumbling to herself about the ornaments being in the wrong place. An ache to be the family she enjoyed Christmas with thumped in the broken part of his heart.
“Stay here while I check the rest of the house.” He didn’t wait for a snarky remark as he ignored the surprising desire he wasn’t ready to act on. With efficiency born from years of training, he checked the spacious kitchen in the rear of the house that he and Gran could cook in without bumping into each other, the small office, and the neat garage. All were clear, as were the three bedrooms on the upper level. He hadn’t needed clarification about which one was Beth’s.
As he jogged down the stairs, he spotted her on her knees in front of the coffee table, eyeing a shoebox-sized gift wrapped in shiny purple paper.
“What’s that?”
“I told you my family didn’t always celebrate holidays on the exact day because of my dad’s schedule, but my mom always had special presents waiting for me on Christmas morning.” She picked up the box and shook it. “Purple presents.”
Skirting the low table, he sat on the couch across from Beth. “Open it.”
Beth bit her lip. “I should wait until Christmas, but…”
“You won’t.”
“No. I won’t.” She giggled as she tore into the paper. As she opened the box, she squealed.
One by one, she pulled out bottles of lotions and gels, tubes of cream and lip gloss, and flower-shaped soap. “I mentioned to my mom I was almost out of my favorite shampoo, and she got me more.”
“Looks like she got you the whole drugstore.” He picked up a round container and read the label.
Lilac after-shower moisturizer. For use all over your body.
He dropped the container like it was on fire. Visions of burying his face between her lilac-scented breasts, her legs, and every other place on her body threatened his resolve to keep his hands off the forbidden scientist. A quick taste wouldn’t mean he was ready to settle down. It would only mean his enhanced strength wasn’t enough to stop himself from taking this gift thing a step further.
He pulled one of the tins from the bag he’d placed on the table and opened it. “I’ve got something purple for you too.”
Her eyes widened as she dropped the gloss she’d just dabbed on her lips. “Are those sugarplums?”
“Straight from Gran’s kitchen.”
She clapped her hands together. “I’ve never had one.”
Me neither. Well, not the kind he’d been dreaming about since they’d met. He plucked a treat from the pile in the tin and held it out. “Taste.”
Leaning over, she opened her lips. Her tongue darted out and touched the purple sugar crystals. Kane swallowed, imagining how his sugarplum would taste.
His sugarplum?
His stomach plummeted to the couch cushions. Thinking about a future with Beth and recognizing it couldn’t happen was one thing. Thoughts popping into his head like an ambush he didn’t have time to battle was another. Beth wasn’t his. Gran’s predictions could not be coming true. He may have gotten himself in deeper with the disarming scientist than he’d intended, but he wasn’t scheduled to meet the woman he’d settle down with until years from now .
Beth leaned closer. The scent of lilacs mingled with the nutty aroma of the sugarplum as she bit into it. He couldn’t pull away, even if he’d tried, from her sultry groan and the ravenous look on her face.
The rest of the treat disappeared through her glossy lips. He watched her swallow, his eyes following the column of her neck down to the swell of her breasts peeking from the V of her sweater.
“More.” She licked her lips. “Please.”
Instead of picking another treat from the box, he held up his sugarcoated finger.
She eyed the offering and hesitated. Holding his breath, his pulse pounding with every millisecond that passed, he waited for her to decide how far she would take this moment. He knew how far he shouldn’t take it. He should give her the tin, get their bags from the car, and lock himself and his laptop in a room and search for Chavez.
If she backed away, he would.
With a sigh that shot straight to his cock, she flicked out her tongue again. Her slow lick, like she deliberately took her time eating every crystal of sugar off his skin to drive him wild, matched the devilish look in her eyes. She knew what she did to him.
Enjoyed it.
Fuck, she reveled in it.
He leaned farther across the table. Snaking his hand around her neck, he gathered up her curls and tugged her within mere inches of his lips. “Do you have any idea what you are doing to me, sugarplum?”
The security app on his phone beeped an alert. He yanked the device out of his pocket and cursed. “Someone’s approaching the rear of the house. Stay here.”
Beth whipped her head toward the back door in the kitchen. “How do you know?”
“Superpowers,” Kane muttered as he hurried through the rooms like a stealthy predator.
Licking sugar off her lips, she followed in his wake. She wasn’t about to stay put. She doubted a trained mercenary like Chavez would openly tromp through her parents’ backyard. How had Kane known someone was approaching anyway? She hadn’t heard a thing other than his question still sounding in her brain.
““Do you have any idea what you are doing to me, sugarplum?”
He held up his hand. The motion halted her and her contemplation of his question. A heartbeat later, his shoulders relaxed.
“It’s your neighbor.” He opened the door. “You suck at staying put, you know.”
She couldn’t argue that, but she had been about to suck the sugar off his finger. Had been thinking about sucking that full lower lip into her…
Rita derailed those thoughts as she entered the kitchen and handed Beth a gold box. “I just wanted to drop these off.” She turned her pink-painted smile to Kane. “I hope you two enjoy them.”
Beth lifted the lid and sniffed. “Your famous butter cookies. Thank you so much.”
Kane slipped past them. “I’ll get the bags from the car.” He looked back at Beth. “Close the door behind me.”
She gave him a salute as she kicked the door closed with the toe of her boot.
Rita pulled her in for a hug. “I just had to come over and say I’m so happy for you.”
Beth schooled her features into a bright smile and hugged Rita’s plump body. “The relationship is still new. My parents don’t even know yet, so please don’t tell them.” She wasn’t prepared to answer questions like, “Where did you go on your first date, and what does Kane do at the Department of Defense?”
Well, our first date was at the hospital because I got caught in the middle of a break-in and hit my head, and then I had a nightmare, and then the date went to hell. And as for work, he’s some sort of super soldier with a bionic leg who can take down and disarm two grown men with a simple kick in a matter of seconds.
And what would she say if someone like Evangeline, who was nosy as hell, asked how Kane kissed or if he was good in bed?
Beth’s ache to gather data on those scenarios and give a full and accurate report had been building for weeks, but she couldn’t allow the pulsing beat between her thighs to guide her decisions. She knew what people said behind her back. Even though their words were hateful and ridiculous, she hadn’t figured out how to penetrate the part of her brain that believed the devil’s voice.
It’s not my fault those men died. I’m not cursed, and I don’t deserve to be punished for God only knows what I did or didn’t do.
Still, she had to tell Kane about her tragic past before he heard it from someone else.
Rita patted her arm. “Don’t you worry. I won’t say a word to your parents. Are you and your man going to the party tonight?”
“Yes.” Beth bit her lip. “But…”
“Don’t worry about that either. Jerry and I won’t let any of those busybodies say anything to your man about anything. If one of the coiffed banshees so much as casts a glance his way, I’ll drown her in the punch bowl.” She rubbed her hands together. “Oh, but I hope I catch Judy Martin running her mouth. That woman thinks she’s better than everyone in this town. Just the other day, she was bragging to the cashier at the supermarket about her daughter, Evangeline. Are you still friends with that girl?”
“We were friends.” Until she blamed me for Danny’s death . “We’re more like colleagues now.”
“Good. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.” Rita waved her hand. “Anyway, when the cashier mentioned her daughter goes to the community college, Judy, in her most condescending tone…you know the one.”
“Oh yeah, I do.” Beth seethed inside. “She rolled out that tone at Danny’s funeral when she offered to pray for my soul.”
“Well, she implied that the cashier’s daughter was inferior to Evangeline because she didn’t go to an expensive university.”
Beth snorted. “Sounds like someone should pray for Judy’s soul, but it won’t be me.”
“And nobody needs to pray for you.” Rita put her arm around Beth’s waist. “I know you don’t care what the people in this town think, but here’s my opinion. I may have only seen you and your man together for a short time, but I know what happiness looks like.”
If happiness looked like lust, anxiety, and fear rolled into a tight smile, the assessment was spot on.
Rita stood on her toes and kissed Beth’s cheek. “I’m proud of you for overcoming your fears.”
“Thanks.” But Beth didn’t deserve praise. She hadn’t overcome anything.
Beth said goodbye to Rita and met Kane at the bottom of the stairs. He slipped his phone into his pocket and picked up their bags at his feet. “Which way to our room?”
Panic sizzled in her chest at the thought of sharing her intimate space with Kane. “I’ll be sleeping in my bed. You get the guest room across the hall.”
He motioned for her to go up first. “That’s not how this relationship works, sugarplum.”
She spun on the first step and faced him. “You are not my boyfriend, and I don’t do relationships.”
“Neither do I.”
Her heart sank. It shouldn’t, but it did. Knowing he didn’t want her should make it easier to stop thinking about what he looked like naked. Hell, he’d pushed her away the night of their not-quite-date when her desperation for comfort percolated into red-hot lust and she’d kissed him.
But he’d wanted her. She didn’t remember much of their encounter, but she’d never forget how he’d kissed her back. For the briefest moment, she’d tasted desire on his full, soft lips. Felt his hard cock against her belly when he’d pulled her close. The memory got fuzzy and embarrassing when he pushed her away and told her to go to sleep. She tried not to think about what she may or may not have said, but she couldn’t forget how she’d fought to hold back tears until he’d left the room.
She had her reasons, unfounded or not, for keeping her heart caged in a prison. Apparently, so did he.
Kane pushed open her bedroom door and dropped their bags near her desk adjacent to the window. “This room faces the street, so this is where I’ll stay.” He pushed the billowy white curtain aside and peeked out.
Beth hooked her thumb over her shoulder. “The couch downstairs faces the street too.”
He shrugged off his jacket and draped it over her desk chair. “I sleep where you sleep, so I’m close if anything happens.”
“Fine. Then that’s yours.” She pointed to the oversized lilac love seat. “It pulls out into a bed.”
A grin split his face. “Good thing I look good in purple.”
Damn, did he ever. He looked delicious with his arms crossed over his chest. The outline of his corded biceps under his long-sleeve shirt served as a colossal reminder of why he was here. Still, his presence felt right in her pretty purple room, even though the reason was so wrong.
As he pulled off his holster and placed it, along with his gun, on her desk, she couldn’t help but wonder what it would be like if she didn’t have a bizarre dating hang-up that no self-help book ever discussed.
She stared at the queen-size bed.
Yeah, she could imagine. They’d been alone for five minutes and her plan to not think about temptation was already faltering. But God, there wasn’t a woman on the planet who could blame her.
Despite the clouds, light seeped through the curtains and highlighted the curve of his cheek. The cut of his jaw. His fathomless blue eyes that sometimes flashed with sorrow and pain she was only beginning to understand.
Did his past invade his dreams? Scarlett couldn’t say much about what haunted Chris, but Beth knew it had to do with the losses he’d suffered and not just the loss of his arm. She shouldn’t ask Kane, but she needed to know she wasn’t the only one who feared the dark. “Do you have nightmares?”
He raised an eyebrow. A heartbeat later, he sighed. “Yeah. Ever since…” He glanced at his leg. “But lately, they’ve changed to reflect more recent events.”
“Mexico?”
Darkness clouded his gaze .
“Something like that.” Looking away, he studied the photos tacked to a bulletin board over her desk. “Homecoming Queen, huh? Of course your gown was purple. Why do you like that color so much?”
She pointed to her high school dance team picture. “It’s my school colors.”
Desire lit his eyes. Somehow, she knew it wasn’t for the seventeen-year-old in the photo in the skintight spandex but for the tortured woman standing before him. She wished she could go back to her teenage self. It wouldn’t have been hard to fall for Kane. The only thing that would be hard would be his body.
His leg.
His cock.
She had a feeling it wouldn’t just be hard, but impossible not to beg for seconds after experiencing the power, no, the wonder of First Lieutenant Kane Darren. Yet, she couldn’t ignore the circumstances that brought him to her bedroom—not just in the one she occupied as an adult, but the one all three boys she needed to visit in the graveyard had kissed her in.
She dipped her chin and closed her eyes. Would falling for Kane be different because he was made of steel?
She glanced at her bed again.
His gaze followed hers. “Don’t worry. I’ll stay on my side of the room.”
“That’s not what I’m worried about.” She dropped her gaze to the hardwood floor.
He stepped toward her and lifted her chin with his fingertips. “I know you’re shaken about what happened at the liquor store, but you’re safe here.”
“Right, the liquor store.”
The stalker.
Chavez .
She’d been so caught up in thinking about getting her maddening lust under control she’d ignored that a freaking drug cartel was after her because she knew the formula to cure opioid addiction. God, that sounded insane.
Kane lifted her chin with his fingertips. “Talk to me.”
She pulled in a deep breath, not ready to spill the tragic details about her past, but she owed him honesty, even if his commitment to her safety annoyed her and made her feel special.
“When the stalker started bothering me, I felt insignificant. Like I was just another case to the authorities. Like I was blowing things out of proportion because I was afraid of a man I’d never met. Then, after the cops stopped searching for Danny’s murderer, I felt even less significant, like I was keeping a dirty little secret nobody believed.”
His grip on her chin tightened. “You are the opposite of insignificant. I’m sorry anyone made you feel like you didn’t matter.” He brushed the hair out of her eyes.
And there he went, making her feel special again.
“When the stalking escalated, Scarlett asked her stepfather if he could hire one of the private detectives he used for corporate espionage. Henry had said he’d be embarrassed to ask his contacts to work on such a frivolous case, and it was my fault I was being stalked because I’d gone looking for sex online.”
“That guy is a class A asshole.”
“No arguments there.” She twisted her fingers until her knuckles ached. “I need to tell you something about what gives me nightmares.” She stepped away from Kane and moved toward the curtain. “I don’t just dream about the stalker. I dream about?—”
He pulled her back. “Stay away from the windows. It’s not safe.” He positioned himself next to the frame and spun her to face him, one eye on the street .
“You’re by the window.”
“I’m not the target.”
“You don’t have to look after me in this house. You said it yourself; it’s secure.”
“I’ve been looking after you long before I knew you were in danger.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Superpowers, remember?” His dimples winked as he pulled his phone out of his pocket and glanced at it.
She grabbed his wrist. “Did Scarlett use her techy magic on that too?” The device tilted enough to see a video feed from her parents’ backyard filling half the screen. Leaves blowing around the steps of her house in Alexandria played on the other half.
His explanation from last night about how he’d gotten into her townhome to check for intruders blared in her brain.
“You have your secrets; I have mine.”
“You’ve been watching me?”
With hands shaking from fury and not fear for once, she yanked her phone from her pocket and dialed Nic.
He answered on the first ring. “Everything okay?”
“No. Can you come to my parents’ house? Kane needs to leave.”