Sixteen #3
“Of course I want to watch you fence. How often does one even get to say such a sentence, much less do something about such interest?”
“If we go early, I could show you my equipment and explain how it works. The scoring is electromagnetic.”
“Fascinating,” Gillian said enthusiastically, then seemed to remember Daphne and said, “If that’s all right with you.”
“She doesn’t mind.” Izzy tried to answer for her, but to her credit, Gillian waited, green eyes gently focused on Daphne alone, and something new swirled in her.
That attention, it was more than placating or pity, and even if Gillian were merely practicing some sort of professional skill, she was good at it.
Why was Daphne holding out? Standing there with her arms folded loosely across her chest as if she and Izzy had switched roles.
Gillian was throwing her a lifeline with genuine interest in the most important person in Daphne’s world.
Did she want to become a woman who returned generosity with pettiness?
Maybe internally, but not in her outside voice.
“Sure, I mean, thank you. I appreciate it. I’d love to say I’ll pay you back sometime, but I think we both know you’ll never find yourself in a similar situation.”
Gillian turned her head to the side slightly. “Haven’t I already?”
Daphne stared at her for a second, not making sense of the comment.
“Isn’t a schedule conflict just a type of miscommunication or a misunderstanding? And this one is relatively easy to amend. No research required.”
Daphne’s face flushed as she finally understood. “Oh, well, I suppose.”
Gillian smiled. “Plus, I had coffee and donuts with Brooke this weekend. I’m thinking it might be good for me to loosen my grip on the reins. Perhaps you’re doing me a favor by letting me swerve this evening. It’s not every day I get to go watch children play with swords.”
Daphne smiled. Even if she were being pacified, at least Gillian was doing so with a sense of humor and not a sense of superiority. “When you put it that way …”
“She agrees.” Izzy quickly grabbed her backpack in one hand and Gillian’s wrist in the other. “We could leave right now, and she can get ready for her client. She has to get in the right mindset before sessions. It’s good to give her time.”
Daphne shook her head but managed to smile at her daughter. “You’re not as subtle as your new mentor here, but yes, as long as Gillian doesn’t mind—”
“She wants to go!” Izzy turned to Gillian for confirmation.
“I do want to go,” she confirmed, eyes still on Daphne.
“Okay.” Daphne sighed. “Then you two have fun.”
“Yes.” Izzy cheered and pulled Gillian toward the door without hugging Daphne goodbye.
Daphne watched them go before sinking into a nearby chair and letting the emotions she’d barely held at bay wash over her.
The anger, the resentment, the confusion, the gratitude, it shouldn’t all be able to exist in the small space of her chest, but she felt it collide there.
Her heart rate increased at the memory of Izzy looking at Gillian like some kind of savior while she stared at Daphne like the world’s greatest disappointment.
And then Gillian being exactly the person her daughter expected her to be.
She was centered, kind, and even slightly self-deprecating, while Daphne boiled in a stew of discomfort.
She couldn’t even accept aid gracefully.
What kind of mother didn’t immediately jump for a solution to something upsetting their kid?
God, had she let her own turmoil around Gillian get so out of hand that she’d further disappoint Izzy?
And now, here she was even after the fact still completely elevated, replaying every word and expression rather than centering herself for her client.
She couldn’t go into a cuddle session tense and seething.
Doing so would mean she’d been a bad mom to show up for a client, and then bad for the client.
She shook her head. She was spiraling. Her relationship to Izzy had nothing to do with Gillian, and neither of them had anything to do with her job in this moment. She had to pull herself into her sense of professionalism. She bet Gillian never let her personal life spill into her work.
Nope, there she went again, but she also wasn’t wrong. Even Gillian had admitted last week that she didn’t let being friends with her colleagues keep her from focusing on work.
Daphne softened slightly at the memory and the way Gillian had sweetly made it clear their conversation had stayed with her enough to reach out to Brooke. Daphne had so many questions, but even that annoyed her. Everything had been much clearer when she hadn’t felt so much empathy for this woman.
She blew out a heavy breath. Anger might not be the most helpful emotion, and it certainly didn’t encompass everything she needed to process, but it would have to be enough, because it was much easier to deal with than the sum total of everything roiling through her lately.
And, at least when it came to being angry at Gillian, Daphne had plenty of practice.