Chapter 21 Survival Mode
SURVIVAL MODE
“Is that all you’re buying?”
Reenie looked down at the three bags in her hands. “I got more than I thought I would. Are you only getting those sneakers?”
At least he hadn’t made that part up and had gone into the footwear store and tried on several pairs before settling on one.
Ford looked across the parking lot to some more shops. “I wouldn’t mind going over there. I need some more athletic shorts and T-shirts.”
“Whatever you want,” she said. “We’ve got time.”
It was twelve thirty and, as sad as it was that all it took was something as simple as shopping at an outlet, she was having a great time. Once they were done shopping, he’d probably drop her off and then she’d see him again at dinner.
“Let’s put these bags in the truck.”
When they left the cabin this morning, there was a black truck in the driveway. He said he couldn’t have any passengers riding in the sheriff’s SUV, so he grabbed his personal vehicle. She hadn’t even realized he had one but should have.
As they walked to his truck, the heat on her back had her spinning around for familiar faces, but there were none.
Once the packages were out of her hands, they moved to the street to cross to the other side, her head swiveling fast behind her again.
The hair was standing on her arms, Ford noticing it. It felt as if spiders were crawling across her skin, her mind screaming to run and look out.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, his hand sliding toward the gun on his hip. He was never without it, even out of uniform. His belt had his badge on it, but most knew who he was and were nodding and waving.
It hadn’t occurred to her being seen out with him would draw so many eyes to her and she wondered why he’d done this.
Was it nothing more than that or were her instincts telling her someone was watching for another reason? She knew Oliver was looking for her. Had he found her? Was she stupid to think it would be so easy that he’d give up?
“Nothing,” she said. “I feel as if so many people are watching us.”
“It’s me, not you,” he said.
He was probably right, but it felt different. It felt as if someone was shooting daggers at her back, the pain of a hard shove into a wall flashing into her memory banks.
She’d had to run and hide enough in her life to know what survival mode felt like and this was a rush that had the trigger ready to go off, her hands moving up to cover her head, and her teeth biting on her tongue to not shout out in pain and make it worse.
This was a mistake to come out if every time they were together it drew so much attention to her.
Her nerves couldn’t handle it.
She didn’t want to spend the rest of her life looking over her shoulder, but even a simple outing with her boyfriend felt more overwhelming than she’d ever imagined.
“You’ve had more people say hi or stop you today than I’ve had in the past year of my life.”
Because she stayed in the shadows, but today with Ford by her side, she was getting a tan.
She just hoped she didn’t burn and blister.
“Comes with the job,” he said.
When the traffic stopped, they jogged across quickly, walked into the store he’d pointed out, and they went right to the men’s section.
“Ford. How are you doing?”
“Good, Buddy,” he said.
The guy looked to be in his forties, maybe fifties. “Do you got a minute?”
“I’ll go over here,” she said. Reenie didn’t need to stand there while the guy was pumping Ford’s hand like a salesman.
She was going through the sales rack. She couldn’t remember the last time she paid full price for anything. Outlet shops or not, she wanted her money to stretch as far as it could.
“Maureen?”
She whipped her head around at the woman’s voice that called her name. “Yes.”
“Hi. I thought that was you.”
“Do I know you?” Reenie asked cautiously. Maybe this was the person who was watching her. It just felt too personal for it to be eyes on Ford.
“I was in the bakery on Wednesday. You waited on me.”
The air escaped through her nose. “Oh. Hi. I’m sorry. It’s hard to remember everyone.”
“Especially when you’re new to the area.” The woman’s hand came out. “I’m Cora. I stop in there once a month to get donuts for the office when we have meetings. It’s on my way to work in Glens Falls. I live up the road a few miles from the orchard.”
“It’s nice to meet you,” she said. The woman was a little older than her. She noticed the wedding band on her hand, then saw a young girl move closer.
“Mom, can I get these?”
“You’ve gotten more than enough today, Lila,” Cora said.
“But they are only ten dollars.”
Cora took the shorts out of her daughter’s hand. She’d put the girl around eight and hadn’t realized they’d been browsing the rack next to her.
“Fine,” Cora said. “But nothing else.”
“Sweet,” Lila said. “I’m just going to keep looking though.”
“She always says that,” Cora said, “but somehow I end up buying her more. Anyway, I just wanted to introduce myself formally since you’ll see me around if you stay.”
“I’m not going anywhere,” she said.
“Everyone says that,” Cora said. “But it’s a small area and not that busy half of the year. People move on. Brooke has new people there all the time or does it on her own. That woman is a rock.”
“She is,” she said.
Ford moved over and put his hand on her shoulder. “Sorry about that.”
“Not a problem,” she said. Reenie was going to introduce the two but didn’t even know Cora’s last name.
“How are you doing, Cora?” Ford asked.
Guess no introduction was needed.
“I’ll be better when I get Lila out of here and my credit card can get locked back up. See you later, Maureen.”
Cora moved to the side and she turned to Ford. He had two T-shirts and two pairs of athletic shorts in his hands.
“Ready?” she asked.
“I am unless you want to look some more.”
“I’ve got everything I need.”
Ford paid and they crossed the street to his truck, got in and drove around the corner to a restaurant for lunch.
Once they were seated, she felt uneasy again.
She got that creepy crawly feeling like when one of her mother’s boyfriends used to throw bugs at her, often when she was sleeping, to watch her sit up and scream.
It had her looking around to see if she recognized anyone she saw at the bakery this week like Cora. Or if someone would make eye contact with her and smile or wave.
Nothing though.
“What’s going on?” he asked.
His eyes were drilling into hers. “It feels as if there are a lot of eyes on us,” she said with her head down, looking at the menu that they’d been handed when they sat.
“I’m sorry. As I said, it’s me.” But he lifted his head and scanned the area, just like he’d done when they walked in.
She’d seen him do it at every store they entered.
He was aware of everything going on around him and she had no reason to be afraid, but she was jittery when she wasn’t a few days ago when she got food in town alone.
Someone waved at them and Ford returned it. “Seems to be.”
“Does it bother you? You’re safe here. The more who see you with me, the more who will realize it. Trust me, in a small area, everyone is nosy and if they see something out of place, I’ll know.”
Her jaw dropped. “What?”
He laughed. “Reenie. It’s part of protecting you. These people stopping me, they know who I am. What I do. Hell, Buddy is on the town board and had to pull me aside to say what a great job I did yesterday.”
It seemed like weeks ago, not just a day, that he’d been speeding away from the orchard to the armed robbery taking place.
Just another day in the life for him and she’d been sitting in her cabin sweating and waiting on news.
“Does anything bother you?” she asked. “Get you worked up so that you have to find a way to come down?”
He shrugged. “Not really. No one wants their leader not calm or cool under pressure.”
The server came over and took their orders, then moved away to give them privacy again.
“You’re right. Does the weight you carry ever get to be too heavy?”
She hated that all she did was add more bricks to the load.
“No,” he said. “Never. Don’t think that.
Don’t worry.” He put his hands on the table, palms up waiting for her to drop hers into them.
She did. “I’ve lost women in the past because they couldn’t handle it.
My job, my family. I can handle it all and that includes watching out for you.
I’m not afraid to ask for help when I need it. ”
His siblings. His parents. His community in a way by bringing her out today by his side.
She got it.
“I’m learning to ask for help.”
“I want us to learn together.” He squeezed her hands for reassurance. “I’m not perfect and I’ll make mistakes.”
She laughed. “Ford, no one could make as many mistakes as me.”
“And yet, look where you landed, so you did something right.”