Chapter 26
TRACE
I woke up with the sun piercing my eyes through the skylight. It took me a minute to realize that Wolfe wasn’t in bed next to me.
“Baby?” I called out, voice rough from sleep.
When there was no response, I squinted toward the little shower cubicle that also held the toilet.
Nothing. He wasn’t in here at all.
I briefly panicked that he’d already headed into Montrose without me, but then I quickly remembered I was sitting in his only vehicle.
Scanning the area around me, I realized his phone was missing, but I also saw his guitar was missing. I climbed off the bed and looked around, finally noticing a note folded into the van’s door handle.
Trace—
I don’t have time to wake you and explain, but there’s something important I need to do. Please trust me. When I’m done, I’ll meet you at home. Come find me.
In the meantime, know that every song I’ve ever written was for you. They’ve all been for you.
You’re the best muse I could have asked for.
With all of my love,
Your Wolfe
At first, I thought the “important thing” he needed to do was talk to Jake. It would make sense.
Then my phone pinged with a text from Clay Dennison in Montrose.
Clay
Jake Mason signed the NDA you sent.
That was a surprise. Clay had woken up a local attorney to prepare it, but I hadn’t expected Jake to sign it so quickly. I guessed he really cared about Shay after all.
Or maybe Wolfe had been there and somehow talked him into it?
Any chance you’ve seen Wolfe this morning? Did he come in to provide his statement?
Clay
No. His attorney said that they’d provide a video statement from the plane. Thought you knew.
The plane? What the fuck?
No, I didn’t fucking know. And suddenly, I was reading Wolfe’s note in a whole different way.
Why was he flying home? Had there been an emergency?
Surely I would’ve gotten a text if it were something Marian-related.
Which meant… something related to Fletcher? To Jake? I had no fucking clue.
Clay
FYI - blood test confirmed Lorazepam/Ativan. Nothing long-lasting. Easy for Mason to get his hands on. Officers searching his house now. Sister confused and upset but cooperative. I’ll keep you updated.
I felt bad for Shay, but I felt way worse for Wolfe.
Wolfe… who was on a damn plane.
I blew out a breath and sat on the edge of the mattress, wishing his sudden departure didn’t sting so badly.
Why not talk to me before running away? Was he having doubts about us? Did he not trust me?
I ran my finger over Wolfe’s note, reading it again with fresh eyes.
Every song I’ve ever written was for you. They’ve all been for you.
And then, All my love, Your Wolfe
Those weren’t the words of a man having doubts. Those were the words of a man who’d decided to take some kind of action, like me last night, even if it meant asking forgiveness rather than permission.
So I’d do what my Wolfe had asked: I’d trust him.
I’d trust that what we had was real and that he meant it when he’d said he loved me.
And I’d show him that I was committed to our future together… which meant I had something important I needed to do, too.
Then I’d meet him at home.
It took me about twenty minutes to shower, dress, and arrange to store the van in the campground parking lot until we could have someone retrieve it. I let Brennan know that Wolfe had to leave temporarily, and he promised to let the others know.
Then I hopped in my rental and drove it to the Montrose airport, paying out the nose for a last-minute flight to San Francisco.
A few hours later, I was standing on Jude and Derek’s doorstep, running sweaty palms over my jeans.
Jude threw open the door while looking back over his shoulder to shout something at Derek about getting his headphones off the charger in the kitchen. “We’re going to be late!”
Derek’s voice sounded calmer. “No such thing as late when you own the plane, Bluebell.”
Jude turned back toward me, and his eyes widened in surprise. “Trace! What are you doing in San Francisco?”
“I was hoping to talk to you. You and Derek, I mean. You have a few minutes?”
Jude’s forehead crinkled. “No, not really. We were supposed to fly to Legacy last night, but there was an issue with the crew. We want to be there when the Spring Sling opens tonight since we’re a sponsor.”
I’d forgotten about the town’s music and arts festival, so I assumed Wolfe would have, too.
Derek walked up with a pair of over-ear headphones in one hand and a charging cable in the other. “Trace? Everything okay? I thought you were in Colorado.”
Jude’s eyes tightened with worry. “Colorado? I thought you’d headed home to Montana already. Is Wolfe okay?”
“Yeah. He’s fine.” I frowned. “Wait, you haven’t seen him? I thought… Isn’t he here? In San Francisco?”
“Here?” Jude and Derek exchanged a look. “Why would he be? He’s still out adventuring, we thought.”
“His note said— Never mind.” I shook my head, suddenly interpreting the note differently. “I must’ve gotten it wrong.”
Derek tilted his head and looked at me. “I think you’d better explain.”
I huffed out a laugh and rubbed the back of my neck. “I think you’re right. Can I maybe hitch a ride with you so we can talk on the plane?”
They waved me into the house while they finished grabbing their bags and loaded up a dark SUV in the garage. We made small talk on the drive to the airport, then boarded the sleek jet waiting on the tarmac.
I tried to act totally casual, but I must’ve failed miserably because as soon as we were in the air, Derek met my eyes from the seats facing mine. “I take it this is serious.”
Jude’s worry returned, and he reached across the seat to grab his husband’s hand and hold it tight. “Are you sure Wolfe’s okay? We still haven’t heard from him.”
I nodded, leaning forward to rest my elbows on my thighs. “He’s okay. But he is the reason I wanted to talk to you both.”
My stomach swirled with nerves. I knew what I wanted, and I knew I wouldn’t let Jude or Derek stop me from having it.
But these men were my family. They were important to me.
And if I didn’t plead my case convincingly, that could potentially cause trouble for Wolfe, too.
I took a breath, swallowed, and dove. “I’m in love with your son.”
Derek’s open expression shuttered. For a split second, I envisioned being tossed out of the plane without a parachute.
In for a penny, in for a pound.
“And he’s in love with me,” I continued, clearing my throat. “And I’ll do whatever it takes to be with him.”
Jude turned to look at Derek, as if wondering what was going on or if Derek already knew about this. From the stone-still look on Derek’s face, Jude must have been able to tell it was just as much a surprise to him as it was to Jude.
Jude looked back at me. “Are you talking about Wolfe or Lennon?”
Derek let out a humorless snort. “Baby. He means Wolfe.”
Jude threw up his free hand. “How am I supposed to know? They don’t even live in the same city. Lennon’s the one who lives in Legacy.”
“Wolfe,” I said, fighting the urge to let out a nervous laugh.
“I’ve been half in love with him for six years, if I’m being honest. But I refused to let anything come of it until now.
I need you to know I fought it really fucking hard.
And I just can’t do it anymore. He’s… he’s mine. He’s meant to be mine.”
Jude’s expression softened, and his eyes got a little shiny before he turned back to his husband. Derek bit out a curse. “Goddammit, Bluebell. Don’t point those things at me. This is serious.”
Jude turned back to me with a tremulous smile. “I think that’s amazing.”
“You do?” I squawked.
He nodded. “He deserves the best. You know we think you’re the best.”
Derek grunted. “Trace is a hundred and fifty years old, Jude.”
“I’m forty-six, asshole,” I muttered, rubbing my face with both hands now that I knew Jude wouldn’t let Derek murder me.
“Same difference.”
I glared at him. “Don’t you think I know Wolfe deserves better?
Deserves someone his own age? God, why do you think I fought this as hard as I did?
But Wolfe is… he’s everything. He understands me.
He makes me laugh. He softens all my hard edges and lights up all the dark places inside me.
I’d burn the world to keep him safe, except I know his sweet heart would hate that, so I couldn’t.
And I want to make sure that he has every fucking thing his heart desires, but one of those things is—” My voice cracked.
“One of those things is me. So I can’t make myself stay away from him.
I won’t. And I really hope you can come to terms with it. ”
Derek’s eyes pinned me to my seat. “This why you left San Francisco and went to Montana six years ago? God knows we’d been offering you funding to start SERA for years.”
Jude’s mouth opened in surprise as I nodded.
“I found out Wolfe had feelings for me. I thought it was a crush. I thought he’d get over it.
But I started thinking about him… differently.
” I wasn’t about to say sexually, but they could tell that’s what I meant.
“I didn’t want to lead him on, so I decided it would be easier for both of us if I was far away. ”
Jude asked, “Then what happened? Does this have something to do with why Wolfe took off?”
Derek’s expression darkened, but I ignored it for now. I knew Derek was fiercely protective of his family, and I’d always respected that.
I cleared my throat. “It wasn’t the only reason, but partly, yes.
” I was walking a fine line, trying to protect Wolfe’s privacy but also explain.
“We had a disagreement.” I pulled a face.
“I was an ass, to be honest. Still trying to fight what I was feeling. I went into the backcountry on back-to-back sessions with SERA, so I didn’t know how upset he was.
I didn’t know he was gone until you called me—”
“Shoulda called someone else,” Derek muttered.
Jude nudged his shoulder. “Bullshit. You know there’s no one better at finding Wolfe than Trace because they understand each other. Now, shut up and let him finish.”
“I promise I never had a single inappropriate thought about him until six years ago,” I said quickly. Because I needed them not to think the worst of me.
Jude rolled his eyes. “Of course not. Jesus, Trace.”
Derek gave a slight nod of agreement before saying, “Continue.”
“When I found him in Colorado, we talked. And this time, I actually listened. I realized that staying away from him wasn’t protecting him; it was just hurting both of us.
He’s it for me, Derek. And for a while now, I’ve been it for him, too.
Now that we’ve both acknowledged it, we can’t go back to the way things were. I’m sorry.”
“If he’s it for you, then where the fuck is he?” Derek made a comical effort to look around us in the close cabin of the private jet.
Jude didn’t bother smacking him again, just let go of his hand and crossed his arms.
“He said to meet him at home, so I thought San Francisco. But now…” I smiled slightly as the conversation from my hike with Wolfe came back to me. His favorite place on Earth. The place he could breathe, the place that had always felt like home to him, wasn’t California. “He’s in Legacy.”
“You’re sure?” Jude asked.
Derek’s eyes bugged out. “If he’s missing again, Trace—”
I shook my head, suddenly feeling the loosening of my muscles as my body relaxed into the seat. “He’s not missing. He’s exactly where he wants to be.”
The two of them stared at me for a few moments before turning to look at each other and exchanging some of that mysterious couple-speak that happened without actual words being spoken.
I imagined that would be me and Wolfe, and I couldn’t fucking wait.
This time, when Derek spoke, his voice was soft, and I could hear the vulnerability in it. “Is he happy?”
I thought back to the note he’d left. The way he’d claimed me fully, while leaving to manage his business unapologetically.
“I think he’s going to be.” I glanced out the window to the vast sea of white clouds before looking back at both of them. “And I plan to make sure of it.”
The edge of Derek’s mouth turned up. “Well. I guess that’s that, then.”
I blinked at him. “What?”
Jude’s face broke out in a knowing grin, his eyes still on me. “He means, we’re very, very happy our son chose you, Trace. Also, hurt him and die.”
I snorted, the sound coming out like a half sob. “You’re… you’re okay with this? I waited to tell you on an airplane so you weren’t carrying.”
It was a joke. Derek was allowed to bring a weapon on his own plane. But Jude’s laughter broke the remaining ice between us, and Derek even chuckled.
“Were you really that worried?” Derek asked, standing so he could pull me up into a hug. “You looked like you were going to shit your pants. I thought I was your best friend. Surely I deserve more credit than that.”
It wasn’t until he put his big arms around me that I realized how relieved I was. My entire body shook with the adrenaline crash, and tears spilled from my eyes. “Fuck,” I said into the side of his head.
“I love you,” he said gruffly. “You’re my fucking brother.”
He pulled back but kept his hands on my shoulders. “Though maybe I should find another way to say that if you’re gonna be fucking my son.”
Jude groaned, and I shoved Derek back into his seat with my own noise of disgust.
Derek only laughed. “What? I can’t make jokes? Too soon?”
“Fuck off,” I said.
“Gross,” Jude added.
I met Derek’s eye. “I love you, too. I didn’t want to upset you.”
“Never,” he said fiercely. “I trust you with my life. That includes my family.”
His words healed something in me I hadn’t even known was broken. It took me a few minutes to regain my composure, and it didn’t help when Jude leaned forward to pull me into his own hug.
“You’re a good man, Trace. You are everything I want for my son.”
I muttered my thanks and tried to keep from blubbering the rest of the way to Montana.
When the plane landed, I wanted to head straight to my cabin to see if Wolfe was there.
Unfortunately, Derek and Jude had other plans for me first.