22. Jinx
Jinx
Ellie doesn't say a word for the first few miles of the drive home. She just sits in the passenger seat with her hands folded in her lap, eyes fixed on the middle distance past the windshield.
Quiet Ellie is the version of her that worries me more than screaming Ellie, and even more than pill-stealing Ellie.
Quiet Ellie is the girl who once went two solid days without speaking after her dad called on her ninth birthday to say he couldn't make it, again.
She disappears into a hole so deep and dark I don't know how to pull her out of, and all I've ever been able to do is sit with her in it the same as she always did with me when things got too bad at home.
I flick the turn signal and pull off at the next exit instead of the one that goes home.
"Where are we going?"
"A secret detour."
"A detour to where?"
"It wouldn't be a secret if I told you, would it?"
She doesn't push, which is a red flag in and of itself.
The road narrows and the trees start to crowd in on either side. Then the pavement goes from smooth to more pothole than road. I slow the car down because the suspension on this thing was not designed for the kind of punishment the county roads out by Willow Creek serve up.
Ellie sits up straighter.
"Jinx… are we going where I think we're going?"
"Depends on where you think we're going."
"The hill."
I glance at her. She's looking at me now, properly, her green eyes more focused than they've been for a solid week.
"The hill," I confirm, grinning at her.
It's a dirt turnoff past the back side of the trailer park, up a rutted track the maintenance guys never bothered with, ending at a ridge of scrubby grass overlooking the reservoir. And, on a clear day, the whole stretch of highway that leads out of town.
The three of us used to climb up the hill when Kade was in one of his moods or Kyle was in one of his, and that meant we used to do it constantly.
We'd sit on the grass and pass around whatever Cyrus had lifted from the corner store and pretend we weren't all counting the months until we could leave.
I park where the grass starts and walk around to her side to open the door.
"You're still so chivalrous," she teases.
"Anything for my Princess," I say with a gallant bow, offering my arm to help her out.
She cackles, immediately catching the reference. "Oh my God, I can't believe how many times you made me watch that stupid movie."
"I think you mean the greatest cinematic masterpiece of all time," I correct her.
She squints up at me. "I really can't tell if you're joking."
"Hey, a movie can be both terrible and the best movie of all time."
"Can it, though?" she challenges as we climb the hillside, arm in arm.
The sun is already low, dipping the entire hillside in gold. You'd never know there was an absolute dump on the other side of the trees.
I take my jacket off and lay it flat on a shorter patch of grass that looks least likely to have ticks, gesturing at it.
"Your chaise, Miss Riggs."
She huffs more of a laugh than I've gotten out of her in days.
She sits, then lies back, and I drop down next to her, propping myself on one elbow so I can see her face against the gold.
"You really are a fairytale prince, aren't you?"
"I've been telling you that for years."
"A fairytale prince with a Glock in his glove compartment," she says dryly. "But still."
"Listen, the princes in the original fairytales were mostly just well-dressed warlords. I'm staying true to the source material."
She rolls her head on the jacket to look at me, and as tired as it is, the smile she gives me is the one I've been starving for.
I lean down and kiss her.
Soft and slow, pressing my lips to hers, because she looks like she needs to be kissed like she's the treasure she is. There will be plenty of time for devouring her later.
Her hand comes up to my jaw. I tilt my head and let her draw me in closer, and then she opens her mouth to welcome my tongue in.
I have kissed Ellie Riggs in dreams and in stolen moments and in the bedroom I share with a boy she doesn't entirely know I share it with. I have kissed her as myself and kissed her as a version of her I'd pretended to be.
None of it prepared me for this.
Which is the problem with actually getting what you want.
She pulls back just enough to speak against my mouth."Jinx…"
"Mm?"
"What are you and Cyrus?"
My brain resets itself briefly. I'm still reeling from the kiss, so my filter is dislodged. Very impressive interrogation technique she's got here. Ruthless, but impressive nonetheless.
I pull back an inch. She's looking up at me with her hair all gold and pink the sunset. She isn't teasing me, she just looks… curious.
Which is somehow worse.
"Uh." I clear my throat. "Define me and Cyrus."
"I'm not stupid, Jinx."
"I never said you were."
"Then answer the question."
I drop onto my back next to her with a groan so I don't have to look at her directly, which is a cowardly move, and I own it.
I focus on a fluffy pink-and-gold cloud above us the exact color of her hair that looks vaguely like a duck while my mouth tries to work out what's going on in the clusterfuck that is my brain.
"I don't know," I say honestly.
She raises an eyebrow. "You don't know?"
"I don't. It's a shitty answer, I know, but it's the truth and it has been for…" I wave my hand vaguely in the air. "A long time. Since we were in the trailer park, off and on. Mostly on. But we've never really talked about it, we just…"
"Fuck?"
"Thanks for putting that so elegantly."
She grins. "I'm just clarifying."
"Yes," I say with a sigh. "We fuck."
"That's not a surprise to me, by the way," she says, after she gets her breath back.
I turn my head to look at her. "It's not? Since when?"
"Since forever, Jinx. Since we were kids and you slept with his hoodie under your pillow."
"Hey. That wasn't because—"
"And you used to stare at him whenever he explained anything.
He'd be completely geeking out and rambling about something, and everyone else would just tune him out and roll their eyes, but you…
" Her lips quirk slightly at the edges. "You'd get this glazed, adoring look in your eyes.
Like he was the most interesting person in the world. "
"I guess that explains it," I mumble. "Why he's so insufferable. It's my fault."
She laughs. "It probably is."
"You're… not weirded out?" I ask warily.
"Why would I be?" She tucks one hand under her cheek, settling in. The sun is nearly gone now, but what's left of it is reflecting in her eyes. "It's kind of hot, actually."
"I'm… sorry?"
"You and Cyrus," she clarifies. "The idea of it."
"Eleanor Riggs," I say in my most scandalized tone.
"I'm just saying, I'd watch. If the opportunity arose."
I'm going to have a fucking heart attack.
She grins at me. I see my stupid expression reflected in her eyes, and my cheeks are red hot, and she loves every second of it.
Before I can stop gaping like an idiot and collect myself, she swings a leg over my hips and sits up on top of me.
"Oh," I manage to croak.
"Hi," she says, still grinning, her hands flattening on my chest. Mine find her hips automatically.
She's still thinner than she should be from hardly being able to keep anything down during her withdrawal.
I can feel her hipbones through the leggings, which is why I make her favorite French toast and whipped cream every chance I get, but right now all I can think about is stuffing her with an entirely different type of cream.
Her ass rests on my lower abdomen just above my cock, her thighs are bracketing mine, and I'm trying very hard not to be a complete pervert and notice what color her panties are under that skirt.
Pink. Of course they're pink. I have zero shame.
"Are you trying not to look under my skirt?" she asks, tilting her head until a few golden strands spill over my shoulder.
"I mean, there are things at eye level that are very difficult to ignore," I tell her. "But I'm trying."
She throws her head back with an evil laugh. "Oh my God, you are chivalrous."
"You just got out of active withdrawal," I remind her. "I'm trying to be good."
"Is that what you've been doing while I was in that room?" she asks, moving a few inches back to grind that perfect ass against the bulge that's already hardening in my pants. "Being good?"
I groan and have to fight the urge to buck into her so hard my hips actually tremble from the effort.
"Did Cyrus help?" she continues, taunting me as she grinds her ass against my cock through my jeans and her panties. They're thin and lacy. Her skirt is riding up enough to see the creamy skin underneath the pink rose lace patterns and my mouth waters.
"Ellie…"
"Did he fuck you?" she asks, slightly breathless now as her hands climb up my stomach and chest and she rubs herself against my bulge at a different angle, focusing on her clit. "Did you think about me while he stuffed that thick, pierced cock inside you?"
My eyes roll back in my head as her hands find my wrists and she pins them down, continuing to grind torturously against me. "I… yes," I pant. She has no fucking idea.
She leans down and kisses me, and my brain implodes.
My hands slide up under the hoodie to her warm skin, and her breath hitches when I unhook her bra and run my thumbs over her pert nipples.
"I want to watch next time," she says breathlessly, her eyes dark as they sweep over me.
She grinds harder now, the friction of our clothes almost making it unbearable, but that's part of it. And I'm enjoying the feel of her nails digging into my wrists as she pleasures herself on top of me way too fucking much to risk her stopping by undoing my jeans.
"I want to see him fucking you," she pants, "and I might join in and ride your cock so I can see the look on your face when he makes you come."
"Ellie!" My hips jut up sharply as she digs her nails in deep and grinds that perfect pussy so hard against me I can feel the heat and wetness through the fucking denim.
I come in my boxers, like a complete fucking degenerate, and she kisses me fiercely.
A second later, she comes so hard she shakes against me, and her teeth bite into my bottom lip hard enough to draw blood.
"Holy… fucking… shit…" I groan, my head lolling to one side as the orgasm subsides.
My jeans are wrecked, and it's going to take all my willpower to throw them in the wash instead of bringing them to my face and huffing the scent of her cunt rubbed all over the front, mingled with my come.
Who am I kidding? I'm going to do both.
Then my fucking phone rings because someone always has to ruin something.
Oh, for the love of fuck.
I know before I even look. The ringtone is the theme from The Godfather, which I assigned specifically to Kade's number be obnoxious.
"Is that—?"
"Kade," I answer, fishing the phone out of my pocket one handed. "Yes, Daddy?"
Ellie purses her lips and they wobble from her trying not to laugh.
"How many times have I told you not to call me that?"
"Well, you just ruined the afterglow of a perfectly euphoric orgasm, so consider us even."
There's a long pause. "Ellie's with you?"
"No, I hunted down your deadbeat mom and fucked her. We're running off together, actually. I'm sorry you had to find out this way."
"Fuck you."
The dam bursts and Ellie's laughter spills out.
"Put the little psycho on the phone," Kade mutters.
I pass it to her and she clears her throat, still straddling my recently softened cock. "Kings' headquarters, Ellie speaking."
"Cute. Why the fuck does the GPS in your collar say you're at the trailer park?"
"We're not," she answers coyly. "We're on the hill next to the trailer park."
"For fuck's sake," he mutters. "Jinx, I told you to keep an eye on her."
"I have both eyes on her," I yell so he can hear me. "And if you hadn't called, I would have had more than that in her."
I can basically hear him roll his eyes through the phone. "I hate you both. If you're not home in twenty, I'm hauling you back."
"Bye, Kade," Ellie says in a singsong.
"Bye, Daddy," I add in the same.
He hangs up aggressively somehow, even though it's a cellphone.
Ellie and I look at each other for a few seconds before we lose it.
There's no sign of quiet Ellie anymore. This is the Ellie I'm most familiar with, the first true glimpse of her since we found her again.
"There she is," I murmur, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.
She tilts her head in confusion. "Who?"
"My Ellie," I answer, and her expression softens.
"You are such a sap," she says, leaning down to press a kiss to my lips.
"Guilty," I say, helping her up once she rolls off me. "Come on, I'd better get you home before he follows through on that threat. He's already going to be pissed."
"Was it worth it?" she asks over her shoulders, her eyes glinting as we walk back to the car.
A grin spreads across my face. "Absofuckinglutely."