CHAPTER 37
I lay across his lap on my sofa, tenderly stroking his arm as I tried to stave off an attack of nerves about tomorrow's match.
“What're you thinking?” he asked.
“How much I love being in your arms,” I said, trying to force a convincing smile.
He forged an obligatory one of his own.
“Don't worry, I'm not going to ask you to split up with her. When you make a decision on who you really want to be with, I'm prepared to get hurt.”
“I don't want to hurt you, Sasha. I've never wanted to hurt you.”
“I know. I trust that about you.”
His eyes widened.
“Don't worry,” I insisted. “That wasn't a micro-aggression. I'm one hundred percent responsible this situation... I'm just happy to lie here with you even if we're not sleeping together...” I silenced my lips before I could utter yet.
He squeezed my midriff in his other arm. “I love holding you tight.”
I smiled, naturally.
“Can I ask you a question, Sasha?”
“Of course.”
He studied the movements of my hand on his arm. “What made you stop wearing your wedding ring?”
A rush of panic ran through me.
“It's okay, you don't have to tell me.”
I was on a whirlwind of worry, trying to suffocate my guilty conscience.
“I didn't mean to assume it was because of me-”
“It was,” I lied. “It is.”
He looked at me for several seconds. “Sasha?”
I couldn't take the pressure of his probing gaze, and switched my focus back to his arm again, stroking the hairs more intently with my fingernails. “It's you I want to be with.” I locked my fingers around his wrist. “I'm so glad you're going to be with me tomorrow.”
His mobile vibrated underneath me in his pocket.
I knew it was her.
He slowly slipped his other arm from around my waist and into his pocket.
I knew he was going to leave me now and go be with her.
He pulled his phone out.
I listened to him unlock it and read the text.
He exhaled.
“Everything okay?” I asked, putting on an innocent tone.
He put his phone back in his pocket. “I'll tell you tomorrow, Sasha.”
I clutched him tighter, and waited, hoping I'd feel his free arm around me in a second or two.
He started to move my body from his. “I have to go, I'm sorry.”