Chapter Twelve
Ruby
Ruby had always been a romantic at heart. The kind who preferred slow-burn relationships over quick hookups, who believed in building something real.
She'd never been one for casual sex, for bodies without connection or pleasure without the promise of more. Every relationship she'd entered, she'd entered with hope and the belief that this time, it would be different. This time, she'd found someone who could give her what she needed.
Claire, Melissa, Sarah—they'd all disappointed her in the same way by asking her to be smaller and more secret. And Ruby had learned, painfully, that she deserved better than that.
But standing in Celeste's hotel room, watching her unravel, Ruby was willing to throw every principle she'd ever had straight out the window.
Because her attraction to Celeste wasn't just physical.
It was deeper and more consuming. It had been building since that first moment in the car, perhaps even before that.
And now, with Celeste looking at her like she was afloat on the sea and Ruby was the only life raft in sight, Ruby couldn't walk away.
Even if she knew she should.
“Wait,” she said again, because Celeste needed to hear the thought formulating in her mind. “I need to ask you something.”
Celeste's arms were still wrapped around herself, in a defensive pose. “What?”
“Does your hesitation extend to this?” Ruby gestured between them, her heart hammering. “To sex?”
She was quiet for a long moment, her eyes searching Ruby's face like she was looking for the right answer written there. Ruby waited, giving her space to think, even though the silence was killing her.
“I don't know,” Celeste said finally. “I've thought about it. About being with someone. But the fear of being caught, of someone finding out—” She shook her head, and Ruby saw the weight of years in that gesture.
“Even though Braden and I weren't romantically involved, I couldn't risk it. So I just... shut that part of myself down and didn’t let myself think about anyone sexually.”
Ruby's chest ached on her behalf. Over a decade of denying herself something fundamental and living half a life.
“And now?”
“Now I'm in Memphis. Miles away from home, from anyone who knows me.” Celeste's voice was barely above a whisper, but there was something fierce underneath it. “Now I'm standing in a hotel room with you, and all I can think about is what it would feel like to stop fighting this.”
Ruby's heart was racing so fast she could hear it in her ears. “What are you saying?”
“I'm saying…” Celeste held eye contact before continuing, “I'm not averse to a sexual relationship here and now. But it would have to be short-term and entirely physical. I can't offer you anything else.”
Short-term. Entirely physical. I can't offer you anything else.
Ruby felt something break open in her chest. This was everything she'd sworn she'd never accept again. A bond that had to stay hidden and connections that couldn't grow into something real. A person who wanted her body but couldn't risk wanting more.
She should say no, walk out of this room and protect her heart before it was too late.
But it was already too late, wasn't it? She'd already fallen into shallow waters. And one night with Celeste—even if it was all she could have—felt better than the prospect of nothing.
Just one night. One night to get this out of your system. You can have this and then walk away.
“A one-night stand,” Ruby said, testing the words. They tasted bitter on her tongue.
“Yes.” Celeste took a step closer, and Ruby could smell her perfume and see the pulse fluttering in her throat. “If that's something you'd want.”
Want. What a pathetically small word for the need clawing through Ruby's veins. For the way her entire body was screaming yes even as her heart was breaking.
“Is Evangeline your type?”
“What?” Ruby wasn’t sure she’d heard right.
“The woman downstairs who couldn't stop touching your arm.” Celeste's cheeks were flushed and her voice tight. “Is that the kind of woman you usually go for?”
You're my type, Ruby thought desperately. You with your sharp mind and composure and the way you're looking at me right now like I'm the only thing in the world that matters. You're exactly my type, and that's the problem.
But she couldn't say that. Not when Celeste had just drawn such clear lines around what this could be and saying it out loud would only make the inevitable ending hurt more.
“Are you jealous?” She asked instead, moving closer. Close enough to touch, though she didn't. Not yet.
Celeste lifted her chin, that defensive gesture Ruby was starting to recognize. “Yes.”
The admission sent heat pooling low in Ruby's stomach. At least there was this. Celeste wanted her enough to be jealous, even if she couldn't want her enough to be brave.
“Good.” Ruby drew nearer. “Just so we're clear, I don't want Evangeline. I don't want anyone tonight but you.”
Celeste's breath shuddered out, her hands coming up to grip Ruby's shoulders. “Ruby—”
“One night,” Ruby said, the words catching in her throat. “No promises or expectations. Just this.”
She kissed Celeste before either of them could change their minds. Before her breaking heart could convince her mouth to tell the truth.
Even as she said it, she knew it was a lie. There was no way one night would be enough. But she'd take what she could get and deal with the consequences later.
When Celeste kissed her back with matching fierceness and hunger, she stopped thinking altogether.
They stumbled back toward the bed, fumbling frantically. Ruby kneaded and caressed the smooth skin, feeling each crease and every texture. Each inch of exposed skin felt like a revelation, something sacred being unveiled.
Celeste's hands were equally busy, pushing Ruby's jacket off her shoulders, tugging her shirt over her head. Her touch was almost reverent, as if she couldn't quite believe this was real.
Ruby knew the feeling.
“Tell me what you want,” she murmured. Her mouth brushed against Celeste’s neck, eliciting a squeal of pleasure.
“You. Just you.”
Ruby pushed Celeste down onto the mattress, before settling between her thighs. Celeste's hands tangled in her hair, pulling her into another kiss that was all teeth and desperation and want so fierce it threatened to consume them both.
“I should tell you,” she gasped as Ruby's mouth moved to her collarbone, “I'm not very experienced at this.”
Ruby lifted her head, meeting her eyes. “At sex with women?”
“At sex in general.” Celeste's flush deepened, spreading down her neck to her chest. “Braden and I never—and before that, there were only a few women in college. It wasn't—I never really—”
“Hey.” Ruby cupped her face gently, needing Celeste to understand this. “We'll go slow. And if you want to stop at any point—”
“I don't want to stop.” Celeste's voice was steady, her eyes blazing. “I want this. I want you.”
The honesty in her eyes nearly undid Ruby completely. She kissed Celeste again, pouring everything she couldn't say into the pressure of their lips.
She kissed her way down Celeste's body, taking her time, learning the landscape of her. This was important. Ruby needed to memorize every detail, needed to brand this into her memory because it was all she'd have when morning came.
The small mole just below Celeste's left breast. The soft gasp when Ruby's fingers hooked into the waistband of her jeans. The way her stomach muscles jumped under Ruby's touch.
“Still okay?” She asked, her fingers pausing at the button.
“More than okay.” Celeste's voice was breathless and filled with want.
Ruby helped her out of the rest of her clothes, then shed her own. For a moment they just looked at each other, drinking in the sight. Celeste's eyes went wide, her gaze traveling over Ruby's body with undisguised hunger.
“You're beautiful.”
“So are you.” Ruby kissed her again, slower this time, savoring the taste of her, the feel of skin against skin. “So fucking beautiful.”
She let her hands explore, finding the places that made Celeste arch and moan. The curve of her hip. The sensitive spot just below her ear. When her fingers slipped between Celeste's thighs, finding her wet and ready, they both groaned.
Ruby had always considered herself a giving lover, but this was different.
Every sound Celeste made, every shudder and gasp, went straight through Ruby with a vibrant tremor.
This wasn't just about pleasure, although lord knows there was plenty of that.
It was about connection and showing Celeste what it could be like to be wanted without shame.
About making this one night count for a lifetime.
She took her time, building the pleasure slowly, paying attention to what made Celeste's breathing catch and what made her hips lift, seeking more. When she finally slid two fingers inside, Celeste's back arched off the bed, her hands fisting in the sheets.
Her eyes flew open. “Oh God Don’t stop. Please don't stop.”
Ruby had no intention of stopping. She set a rhythm, her thumb circling where Celeste needed it most, her mouth returning to Celeste's breasts, her neck, anywhere she could reach.
She watched Celeste's face, cataloging every expression, every flutter of her eyelashes, every way her mouth opened in pleasure.
This was what Ruby had dreamed about without knowing it. This intimacy, this trust, this complete surrender.
Celeste's hands came up to Ruby's shoulders, nails digging in hard enough to leave marks. Ruby hoped they would and she’d have some physical reminder of this when it was over.
“I'm—I'm close—” Celeste gasped, her whole body tensing.
“Let go,” Ruby murmured against her skin. “I've got you. I promise I've got you.”
When Celeste came, it was beautiful. Her whole body tensed, then shattered, her cry muffled against Ruby's shoulder. Ruby felt the waves of her orgasm, felt her clench around her fingers, and nearly came herself from the sight of it.