Chapter 18
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
The days passed slowly for Macy. At first, she’d been content to linger in the housing area, using her time to search the accessible rooms. Apart from a few personal items scattered here and there — the most exciting of which was another music player — the rooms were identical.
Even the clothes were the same — the sizes varied, but the cuts, colors, and fabrics were repeated in every chamber.
She’d attempted to enter the locked rooms, but every PIN she punched in was denied, and Jax hadn’t been wrong about the doors — they weren’t going to budge.
Jax forbid her from venturing out of the cabin area on her own, and Macy had been too wary to disobey. Though the elder kraken had declared Macy one of them, she couldn’t forget the animosity they’d directed at her. The best way to avoid trouble was to stay out of sight.
By the sixth day, their new home felt like a prison.
It was clearly worse for Jax. He stayed with her for hours every day, making love and idle conversation, but he’d grown increasingly withdrawn as time passed. He’d leave for long stretches, and Macy understood why.
Wanderer.
In the cave, they’d been free. Jax could take her out whenever either of them wanted to go, could show her places he’d discovered and see them anew through her eyes. The world had been open to them. All that had been taken away from him.
It had been her choice — against Jax’s wishes — to come here. She knew he was unhappy, resentful of his people, but how much blame did he place on her? If she’d listened to him, if she’d just agreed to return to the cave, how different would things be now?
Her recent illness hadn’t helped ease his nerves.
For the last several days, she’d woken up feeling nauseous, and vomited two or three times in a morning.
During those periods, she’d been unable to keep food down.
Even the slightest whiff of fish sent her running to the toilet.
By midday — which she only determined thanks to the clock in her room — her stomach would settle, and she’d feel fine.
She played it off as nothing; Jax was already out of sorts, and she didn’t want to add to his distress.
But she couldn’t assuage her concern. At first, she thought it was the food they’d gathered in the jungle, but she’d consumed plenty of it in the cave without getting sick, and had eaten the same vegetation while she lived in The Watch.
Macy’s mind shifted to the building next.
What if there was a problem with the air filtration system?
Perhaps it didn’t affect the kraken because their respiration was so different, or simply because they were a hardier species.
Humans hadn’t lived here for so long that there was no way to be sure it was still a safe environment — at least not before it was too late.
But the nausea only struck during the morning. If the air was somehow contaminated, wouldn’t she be sick all the time?
By the fifteenth day, she’d had enough. She wasn’t going to allow fear to prevent her from making the most of her situation.
Jax was gone again; his absences had grown longer and longer, and though he always returned by the evening, she missed him terribly during the day.
It felt like they were drifting apart. A seed of doubt had taken root inside her, twisting its way through her being — one day, he might not return at all.
Their lovemaking was as intense as ever, and her connection to him during those times was soul-deep, but when they finished, she felt the rift tear open again, threatening to swallow her up.
Today, she refused to sit and wait.
Macy strapped on the knife and gun Jax had given her for protection — each had a thigh holster, and though she was unused to wearing weapons, they were comfortable enough — and exited the cabin area.
She wandered the corridors barefoot, peering into darkened rooms here and there. She neither saw nor heard any kraken.
When she spotted the sign indicating the pool, she stopped and stared down the hallway at the closed door. Jax had mentioned Arkon often spent time there. She didn’t know if Arkon accompanied Jax to wherever it was he was going every day, but it couldn’t hurt to check. She needed a friendly face.
She approached the door, pressed the button beside it, and entered when it slid open. The overwhelming stench of chemicals assaulted her immediately. Her stomach churned, and she doubled over.
The sound of the door closing behind her was whisper-soft.
“Are you all right, Macy?”
Macy jumped, lifting her eyes to Arkon. He was at the edge of the pool, frowning at her.
She took two deep, slow breaths through her mouth — not that it helped much with the smell — and nodded. “I’m fine. I just…need a moment. The smell in here is…”
“It can be overpowering when one is unused to it.” As though in response to his own words, his nostrils flared. “But I think you will grow used to it in time.”
Macy didn’t share his confidence.
She stepped farther into the room, moving her gaze along the lockers lining the far wall, over the dormant pieces of equipment and machinery scattered around the floor, and finally to the large, rectangular pool in the center.
The water within was totally clear; if it weren’t for the light reflecting on its surface, she might not have known it was there at all.
As she neared the pool, she realized there was something on the bottom. She gasped when it came into full view. The floor was covered with countless small stones, arranged in swathes of color to create intricate, swirling patterns.
“Did you make this?” Macy asked, looking at Arkon. His arms were folded over his chest, fingertips drumming his bicep. “I’m sorry. If I’m…interrupting, or intruding, I can go.”
“Not at all. I’ve refined the patterns to my satisfaction — if only barely — but it’s still missing the centerpiece.
” When he turned his head to her and smiled, the warmth of his expression eased the tension.
“Jax was supposed to bring back a glowing stone, but he’s been understandably distracted for the last few weeks. ”
She returned her attention to the design. “It’s beautiful.”
“Thank you for saying so.”
“I’d guess you don’t hear it often enough. Our people are alike in that way. Most of them like to look at art, but think making it is a waste of time when you could be focusing on something more practical instead.”
“Jax tells me, in his way, and though he claims not to understand it or have any capacity for it…his insights are often enlightening. As for it being a waste of time…I find that a short-sighted notion.”
“Aymee said something very similar to that.” Macy turned her head and studied Arkon. “I think she would love to know you.”
“The more I hear of this Aymee, the more I would love to know her.” He met Macy’s gaze, and his smile faltered. “How have you been, Macy? Though it could have gone worse, the gathering didn’t end how I’d hoped. What faith I had in my kind was, apparently, misplaced.”
“I…don’t blame them. They acted in fear, and even knowing as little as I do about the history between our peoples, I think the kraken were within their rights here.
” She sat down on the edge of the pool, rolled up the legs of her pants, and dipped her feet in.
It was colder than she’d expected. “I’m pretty sure humans would’ve reacted the same way if the roles were reversed. ”
“There are always more extreme elements, it would seem, who make up for their lack of numbers through sheer aggression. Kronus and his group do not speak for all of us, no more than Dracchus, Jax, or Ector do.” Arkon eased himself down beside her; his position looked awkward, with his tentacles folded beneath him to hang into the water, but he made no indication of discomfort.
“You didn’t answer my question, though. How are you? ”
“I’m getting by, one day at a time.” She searched his eyes; their violet hue reminded her of the sky immediately after sunset.
Compared to Jax and Dracchus, Arkon was lean, his face narrower and more refined, but he seemed no less powerful.
“You’ve been Jax’s friend for a long time.
How often does he normally remain here between his wanderings? ”
Arkon lifted his hands, palms up, and shrugged. “Days, sometimes. This is the longest I recall him being here in many years… He’s out of sorts. Restless. Not his usual self…”
Macy’s eyes stung with tears, and she turned her face away. “I trapped him here.”
“You cannot blame yourself for this, Macy. I know without a doubt that Jax does not.”
“How can you be sure?” she asked, wiping the back of her fingers across her cheeks. “He is rarely here.”
“I have known Jax for most of my life. And the way he looks at you… He blames the others. Dracchus, yes, but the rest even more so. For him, being caged is worse than death, and they caged his mate. He won’t easily forgive any of them for it. Kronus is lucky you managed to calm Jax down.”
Macy managed a small smile. “How can I help him?”
The tips of Arkon’s tentacles flicked slowly from side to side, gently splashing. “Patience. Though I won’t deny that he could benefit from being slapped around a bit, too.”
She laughed; it felt surprisingly good. “He doesn’t like that very much. I’ve done it a couple times.”
He grinned. “Honestly, Macy… I think he’s so caught up in what has been lost, that he’s losing sight of what he has.”
“Thank you, Arkon.” She settled a hand over his. It was clear why Jax considered him his closest friend; of all the kraken — Jax included — Arkon had been the kindest, the most accepting.
“It is no trouble.” Though his movement was subtle, she noticed his gaze drop, and he furrowed his brow. He lifted his arm to get a closer look at her hand. “The similarities are as pronounced as the differences…”