Chapter 27
tweNty-seVen
"HOLD ON, LITTLE MOTH."
Awareness came and went in waves, dragged back by pain sharp enough to steal my breath. Quin's voice grounded me, my hand in his a physical tether that kept me from passing out. Again. Low murmurs of conversation drifted in the background.
I focused on him instead of the fire crawling across my back. "Quin," I rasped, my throat raw. I wondered how long I’d screamed.
"I'm here. I've got you."
A spasm rolled through my shoulders and I whimpered. My fingers tightened around his. He didn't flinch, just held me. His other hand ran up and down my forearm, whisper-soft and comforting.
"I shouldn't have—" Guilt closed my throat.
"No." I felt the bed dip as he shifted closer. "Don't."
I cried out as a wave of pain locked my muscles. Both of Quin's hands tensed.
"Easy," he murmured. "Don't move."
I cracked my eyes open. My vision swam and tears leaked into the pillow. I felt weak. Helpless. Na?ve. "They knew," I whispered, "I was looking. They knew I'd keep digging."
"I know." His voice broke.
I blinked and looked at him. His jaw clenched tight, a muscle twitching in his neck. His ears were pinned flat. He looked at me like if his eyes wandered for even a second, I might disappear.
"Five taps. The cavalry came. For a minute, I wasn't sure..."
"Always." His voice was hoarse. "I will always come for you."
My inhale stuttered in my chest and I could barely breathe past the knot in my throat. Quin leaned even closer, rubbing his muzzle along my arm.
"I'm here," he rumbled. "You're safe now. I've got you."
"I found it," I gasped. "The files for 55B. I copied them onto a thumb drive. I was heading home when Hector convinced me to go back inside." The skin on my back stretched and burned as I breathed. "I was so stupid."
His hand trembled.
"You warned me. Not to go."
"I was scared," he said, his voice rough.
"I needed to know." The burn seemed hotter.
"I know."
Pain spiked and I screamed. I wanted to curl into myself and started to do just that. My skin stretched and felt like it ripped apart. Quin braced me, trying to soothe me with a constant rumble of nonsense. The pain ebbed and I sagged with the reprieve.
"If I had let you bite me," I whispered, "this wouldn't have happened."
"I wouldn't have gotten there any faster, little moth. There is no blame to be placed here."
"Maybe you should—"
"No." I watched his throat bob. "Not when you are hurting. Not because I'm afraid. When you are well. When you choose me with a clear mind."
"Okay," I choked out as another wave of pain tore through me.
Quin was as close as he could be without crawling under my skin.
"Breathe with me," he said. "In. Out. That's it. Focus on breathing."
When the pain subsided to a level I could handle, exhaustion overtook me. Quin's whispered words were the last I heard before I slid into darkness.
"I didn't protect you."
Even as I succumbed to the pull of sleep, I knew that wasn't true.
PAIN PUSHED ME TO the surface. Hot and deep, like an iron pressed into my back. I groaned, and a steady hand curled around my ribs.
"Easy. You're okay," Quin rumbled.
I wasn't convinced.
Air moved over my back. and I grimaced.
"Phoenix is here." Zeus's voice announced from the hallway.
A woman stepped into view, shouldering Quin to the side. Gray strands in her hair sparkled in the overhead light. Behind cat-eye glasses, her eyes flicked over me in efficient passes.
"Well," she said. "That's a mess."
I huffed a weak laugh. "You should see the other guy."
Her lips twitched. "I'm Phoenix Riley."
"Haven." It was barely a grunt.
She nodded. "I know." She rubbed her palms together, pink and white sparks falling from her hands. "You're something special. Zeus pulled me away from a cursed prince." She shoved at Quin again. "Move, I need space."
He growled instead.
She frowned at him. "I need you to stay calm."
She reminded me of a schoolmarm with a wooden ruler. I almost laughed at the mental image of her smacking his knuckles.
I squeezed his fingers. "I'll be okay."
He grumbled, but moved about three inches to the side, not letting go of my hand.
Phoenix harrumphed, but let it go. She peeled away the bandages Quin had placed on my back and I hissed.
"Scale of one to ten," she asked.
"Fifteen, and on fire."
"Fair."
I couldn't see what she was doing, just movement from the corner of my eye.
She took a sudden step back. "Well, that's not good."
I croaked. "Not something you want your healer to say."
Her mouth curved. "I like you."
"That's... good?"
"This is going to get worse before it gets better."
Of course it was.
“I can’t knock you out,” Phoenix said flatly. “I need your nervous system online. Brace yourself."
I wanted to ask how I was supposed to do that, when the tiniest of movements sent pain screaming through every nerve, but I didn't get the chance. Something heavy and viscous oozed its way from my right shoulder blade to my left bicep.
Pain ripped through me like lightning. Half an inhale was stuck in my chest and I couldn't finish or push it out. Whatever crawled across my upper back felt like a wet blanket. Then its weight increased.
I screamed until I ran out of air.
"Breathe, Haven." Quin's voice shook.
I locked onto his voice like it was a rope. Not because he was loud. Because he was there. Because he was safety and comfort and I trusted him.
I sucked in a breath only to let it out on a wail. "Get it off!"
"No." Phoenix's voice was calm, even as Quin snarled like a feral animal. "The chemical was still burning. Would keep eating at your flesh. I'm forcing it to be done."
How do you force a reaction to finish? With a great deal of pain, apparently. Black crowded my vision at the edges. I hoped to pass out. That would at least give me a momentary reprieve.
I had no such luck.
After what felt like an eternity, the fire licking over my back dulled. It didn't cease, but it did lessen.
Phoenix clapped her hands. "Good. The reaction has stopped. Her tissues stabilized. She won't lose any more skin."
The ooze that had caused so much pain now felt soothing. I sagged against the mattress.
Quin's growl cut off and he cleared his throat. "She'll fully recover?"
"No."
The growl returned.
"She'll have one hell of a scar, but she'll regain full range of motion."
"Good," I exhaled.
I could feel them both looking at me.
"I want the reminder that I'm alive."
Phoenix snorted and shuffled around the bed, finishing her work. I smelled mint and the ooze cooled and numbed. Her low chanting vibrated in my bones. By the time she was done, exhaustion weighed on me like a dump truck.
She turned to Quin. "She's going to sleep like the dead as her body works to heal. Don't wake her unless you have to."
"I won't," he promised.
Phoenix paused. "You did good. You stayed calm."
"I came very close to losing it."
She nodded. "I know."
TIME FRAGMENTED. SOOTHING HANDS rubbing my arms and lower back. Blankets adjusted over my legs. Spoonfuls of broth being tipped into my mouth.
Eventually, I surfaced enough to realize I was draped over Quin's chest. "How long?" My voice rasped and I wondered if it was from disuse or screaming.
"Three days."
I'd thought hours, not days. "Wow," I whispered.
I twisted my hips and winced.
"Be still." His hand fell to my hip to drive the point home. "How bad is the pain?"
"Not as bad as I expected." I tensed my shoulder and measured my pain level. "Seven out of ten."
His chest stalled for a beat before resuming its gentle rise and fall. "I hate they touched you. That I didn't get there in time. That I couldn't stop it."
"They wanted to break me." I wove my fingers through the dense fur at his side. "They failed."
We stayed like that for several minutes. His patience astounded me. You'd think an irreverent jokester wouldn't possess the ability to sit still for long, but he certainly did.
"I should get off of you."
He grunted. "You should stay right where you are."
"I need to pee."
"I don't mind."
I huffed out a laugh. "I do." I braced myself on his chest and tried to push up, but the burn pulled and felt like it cracked open. Before I could suck a breath through my teeth, he'd scooped me up and placed me on my feet. "Thanks."
I blinked and looked down at myself. "Um... why am I naked?"
"Phoenix said to keep your back and arm uncovered."
"Okay, but why don't I have on underwear?"
He tugged at his ear. "Sponge baths."
"Right. Okay." I was trying to figure out whether I should be embarrassed when the doorbell rang. I ducked into the bathroom after snagging a pair of underwear and some pajama pants. I was washing my hands when a heavy knock on the bathroom door made me jump.
"Haven, it's Phoenix. I'm here to check the burn."
I threw my right forearm across my chest and opened the door.
Phoenix nodded and twirled a finger for me to turn around.
"Good. The slime coat is almost fully absorbed."
"Wait, the slime coat?"
She snickered. "Not a scientific name, I know. It's a spelled poultice, really. As it heals the wound beneath, it gets absorbed by your body. It has all sorts of mending goodies in it." She prodded at the burn and I hissed. "Pain level?"
"Seven."
"Good. I was able to regenerate some of your nerve endings, so the scar won't be completely numb.
You need to move around more. I'll leave some exercises for you to do that will make sure you keep full use of your arms. They're going to hurt like hell the first few days, but trust me, you want to do them. "
"Yes, ma'am."
"Now tell me how you're doing emotionally. Nightmares? Flashbacks? Anxiety?"
"I don't remember any nightmares, and I've only been conscious for maybe thirty minutes, so I haven't had time for flashbacks or to get anxious."
She walked to stand in front of me. "Have you seen it yet?"
I shook my head. I wasn't afraid, exactly. I would wear the scar like a badge of honor. Assholes thought they would break me. But I knew it would be ugly.