Chapter 35
Chaos and Order are more related than we think.
— ALARIC SARE’S PAPERS FOR EMBERLINE ARKOVA
As soon as I felt it, I knew what it was.
Joy was never going to be some grand destination for me.
It was found in stolen moments with those I loved.
My and Hart’s future was not guaranteed.
It was one we’d both fight for, but that didn’t mean we weren’t living now.
The present might be filled with trials to complete, rebel groups to coordinate, and a revolution to plot, but it was still ours.
Stealing time for ourselves helped me recognize that.
My life didn’t start when this was over. I lived it now.
For a few hours, we acted as if the kingdom didn’t need us.
We made love as if our plans for tonight weren’t wholly dependent on completing our tasks.
No amount of Hart would ever be enough, but when the shadows elongated with the afternoon light, we returned to our work.
Even with some conclusions drawn about the choice, Hart read through Alaric’s pages again.
We learned all we could in preparation for the final trial.
And it was our final trial.
All six gems now glowed in the throne part of the pendant.
The dragon’s eye mocked me as I stared at it. Of course location would matter, and of course it would be a location we’d only visit to overthrow Rodric. I just wondered when we’d get the chance. When would each of the groups be ready to move?
I considered the small space we’d settled in for the day.
This spot, hidden in the woods, didn’t have great significance to me, but it would be a location I remembered.
It didn’t surprise me that I’d found joy outside of Kavios.
The kingdom had stolen so much from me for so long that it was hard to imagine happiness there—at least as it currently was.
We had returned to camp when darkness fell. Fires glowed, warming stew for a brief meal.
“Ready, Chaos?” Hart held my gaze as I set aside my bowl. I felt a hidden ask in his question, like maybe if I gave the right signal we could flee this place and these responsibilities.
No. No matter how tempting. That was not the fate I would choose for myself. I would claw power from the Blessed. We would free Hart from Themis. “I am.”
The gems were packed and ready. I’d made five with what we’d stolen from the mines. We’d given two more to the Storm. I gave one to Hart, since he and I were the only two capable of wielding nightmares. That left two we would offer to the Feared tonight as part of our negotiation.
Alysa and Reid insisted on joining us. That meant Harrow flew overhead as well. I wasn’t opposed, although Hart seemed skeptical. “The Feared don’t think highly of the Storm. They see the camp as a choice to ignore the problem instead of fighting it,” he said.
I understood how one might assume that, given they lived outside the city, but Alysa’s decision to keep the camp close regardless of the risk of discovery proved she sought to support citizens who wanted out. Ultimately, I wasn’t sure there was a right way to survive as a human in Kavios.
“The gems will help,” Hart grumbled. “Seeing Alysa and Reid’s stones will show the futility of saying no, but don’t expect the Feared to be happy about it.”
That was good enough for me. I knew they were skeptical of me as much as the Storm.
Not so long ago, they would have killed me to stop the sourcing of the adamas gems. I hoped to change their tune with our gift.
My ability could benefit them in their battle against the Blessed.
And my and Hart’s magic was unmatched, even if we were limited to wield through the adamas.
I truly believed this could work for all of us.
“You’re sure you’re alright to take us through one of your secret entrances?” Alysa asked, elbowing Hart.
His nostrils flared, like maybe he wasn’t at all happy with granting the Storm access to the city through an unmonitored tunnel. He nodded nonetheless. “Don’t abuse it.”
She wiped his fears away with a flick of her wrist. “If all goes according to plan, we won’t have need of it as a secret entrance for much longer.”
I supposed that was true. “Let’s go plan a rebellion,” I said as I stashed the gems in my pocket.
Harrow, who at this point rested on Alysa’s shoulder, flapped his wings and flew away as if he understood my words.
I shook my head. He wouldn’t enter the tunnel with us.
Alysa said he’d caw on the other side if guards were present.
I had so many questions about her bird, but I kept them to myself as Hart led us to the trapdoor on the Oldwood side of the wall.
I unwrapped my pendant so that the colors of the adamas glowed as I climbed down the ladder into the cavern with Eris’s altar.
Alysa and Reid followed, leaving Hart to secure the door for our exit.
“So, this is where it happened?” Reid asked in a whisper. Hart had mentioned that the two of them knew each other from the Feared, years ago, but I still couldn’t quite figure out what put that note of awe in Reid’s voice when it came to Hart.
“Where what happened?” Alysa asked as she landed next to him.
“Where the Cursed King was cursed.”
Alysa rolled her eyes at Reid. “Will you stop calling him that? He’s just a man.”
Reid laughed. “Have I got a rude awakening for you, love. We’re headed toward a roomful of people who think he’s more myth than man.”
Even in the low light, I could see Hart roll his eyes.
Alysa raised her hands in a gesture of peace as Hart dropped to the ground next to her.
For all their teasing, Reid and Alysa both seemed to realize what else this place meant to Hart.
It wasn’t just where he’d been cursed. It was where his mother died in his place.
As soon as his feet touched the ground, they cut off their conversation and focused on the way through the tunnel.
The castle grounds weren’t exactly quiet as we pushed up through the trapdoor on the other side of the wall, but patrols were predictable.
Harrow did as Alysa promised. When a pair of guards neared, Harrow’s caw sent us diving into the hedges.
From my time at the castle as Jeweler, I knew that meant the next pair would pass in ten minutes.
Reid led when the way was clear. He crouched below the hedge line with near-soundless footfalls. Each of my steps sounded like crunching leaves on the forest floor compared to his silence. Someday, I’d ask about his skills.
As the descending slope to Lower Hill came into view, we paused. The patrol had turned right toward the castle. The next set would do the same. While they faced the opposite direction, there was far less cover along this dirt path to Cross Street.
“We’ll have to risk it,” Reid whispered.
Before Reid took a step from the garden, a caw sounded. Hart held Reid in place as one of the pair of guards turned to survey the area.
That was too close.
“New idea,” Hart said. “Does anyone have envy to share?”
As much as I hated using the adamas, Hart had a good point. One of us could wield envy to persuade the guards to look in the other direction while we crossed the exposed space.
“I’ve got you,” Reid said, and offered his hand to Alysa. She took Hart’s adamas and her husband’s hand, looking thoughtful.
“Alright, Alysa?” I asked while the gem flashed green.
She shrugged. “Most of us are not great with mind magics. I forget that you and Hart are. It will make a difference.”
I hoped that applied to the Blessed, too. It was true that the king’s ability to wield sadness was unmatched, and Elias was strong with persuasion. Part of me wondered if that was another underhanded attempt to further Themis’s aims in Kavios.
Alysa dropped Reid’s hand and passed the gem to Hart. It glowed green as Hart whispered words to the guard—words he’d never hear. The guard listened anyway, returning his gaze to the castle.
“Now,” Hart urged.
We didn’t wait for further instructions as we sprinted down the hillside path.
It was short, and the gem’s glow faded to the natural, clear quartz as soon as we hit Cross Street.
Blending in with the crowd in this part of the entertainment district was a little easier, although we still crossed the street in pairs to avoid unwanted attention.
Hart and Reid entered Forest’s Edge through the front door.
They would walk into the high-stakes gambling area from within the tavern.
Once inside, they would open the alley door to let Alysa and me in.
“You sure about this?” Alysa asked while we waited in the familiar alley. She leaned against the brick wall that surrounded the city and toyed with a knife from her belt.
“Which part?” I asked. I couldn’t help but shift my weight from foot to foot, expelling nervous energy while I had the chance.
“I don’t know … all of it? Finishing your trials?
Overthrowing Rodric? Taking his place?” She didn’t add the final item, Hart, though I knew she wanted to.
Alysa and I understood each other. We had since that first day I’d arrived at the Storm, when Hart had brought me to learn where the youngleaf came from and to see what a life outside the confines of Kavios could be.
“We all do what we have to in order to sleep at night,” I said.
She laughed. “Most who say that drink to excess to forget about their financial worries, or maybe they have lots of sex to forget how shitty this kingdom can be. I assure you most aren’t plotting to overthrow a king—with his son, no less.”
And we’d returned to the heart of her question. “I love him, Alysa.”
She held my gaze and nodded slowly. “Alright. I’ll leave it. I know Reid trusts him, too. I just want to make sure you know what you’re doing. He’s still a threat to this kingdom until you finish your trials.”
I nodded.