Chapter 27 #2
I blink, trying to recall the moment my body gave out. There are gaps in my memory. Pieces that are blurring together in pain and heat and— Koen.
“I’m a vampire, the king,” Dimitri adds. “I couldn’t exactly walk up to the fae court holding their unconscious princess covered in blood. They’d have killed me on sight or started another war.”
“... Right.” I swallow and give a small nod. “You did the right thing. Thank you.”
He’d taken care of me. But then—
“Where’s Koen?”
He doesn’t answer right away.
“The last thing I remember…” A lump forms in my throat. “He was almost burnt out. His magic...he looked like he was going to break.”
Dimitri looks away. “He’s alive.”
Relief crashes into me so hard I almost sob. “Is he here?”
He sighs and moves to sit at the edge of the bed, though his posture remains rigid. “He couldn’t come; the trial isn’t over. I made sure he made it to the other two champions. They had already found each other while we were tracking them.”
“So he stayed. Even after...” I trail off.
“Even after nearly burning himself out to keep you alive?” Dimitri’s voice is quiet. “Yes. He stayed. He had no choice.”
I turn away, guilt sitting heavy in my chest. “I didn’t mean for him to…I didn’t ask…”
“You didn’t have to. He did it anyway.”
Dimitri studies me for a moment, then says quietly, “He looked at you like he would lose his soul if you died. Made me promise to protect you before I left.”
An ache blooms behind my ribs. “Why?”
“Maybe you should ask him.”
“What if he doesn’t make it out?” I whisper.
“He will,” he says, without hesitation.
Just then, Ravelle strides in, carrying a tray stacked with pastries and tea. She sits on the bed beside me, setting the tray down between us. Her eyes flick between Dimitri and me , unreadable.
“Dima, my dear,” Ravelle says sweetly. “You may leave now.” She waves him off like he’s a servant.
“What?” he asks flatly.
“I finally have Ren back, and you are intruding on my time with her. We are going to have a girls’ night, and she is going to tell me all about this Koen I heard about when I was eavesdropping.” No shame at all. Then she turns to me, eyes sparkling. “Is he hot?”
Heat creeps into my cheeks before I can stop it. Just his name is enough to make my heart feel like it’s doing backflips. His face flashes in my mind—gold eyes, steady, full of fire—and the memory feels like both a wound and a lifeline.
Dimitri clears his throat. “Our little princess here is quite fond of the human.”
My eyes fly wide. “Wha—”
Ravelle’s gasp cuts me off. “ Human? Oh, this is good.”
Dimitri smirks. “He was just as taken with her. Infatuated, actually.”
“He’s not—”
Ravelle squeals and claps her hands, cutting me off again. “Oh, stars above ! I want to see him. Vaelshad me there! Just for a peek. I promise I won’t touch his blood. Well…I mostly won’t.”
“Gods, can you both stop?” I snap, exasperated, though my cheeks are burning hot. My shadows twitch restlessly under my skin, betraying the storm his name stirs in me.
They share a look, twin smirks stretching across their faces, and I groan.
“You are too much alike. It’s unbearable,” I mutter, crossing my arms. But the motion sends a stab of pain across my chest, and I wince.
Dimitri’s teasing fades in an instant. His voice softens. “Fine. I’ll go. Make sure she takes it easy, Ravelle. She still needs rest.” His gaze lingers on me, unreadable, before he slips from the room and closes the door softly behind him.
Ravelle turns back, all playfulness gone. “How are you, Serenya? Truly.”
“I’m okay.” It’s a lie.
She studies me in silence, her features filled with concern. “You’ve been through so much. I’m sorry I wasn’t there. I thought you wouldn’t want to see me.”
“You’re right. I didn’t.” The answer comes out sharper than I meant. But she’s right, I wouldn’t have wanted to be around her. Even if she never did anything to deserve my anger, she still reminded me of the life I lost.
She doesn’t flinch. “Listen, there’s something you should know. Dimitri—”
“I don’t want to know.” The words rush out, cutting her off before she can drag me into another web of betrayals. “Not right now.” I force a weak smile. “Can we talk about something else? Anything else. Well, except for men.” I give her a pointed look.
She fake-pouts, tossing her pink hair back. “Fine. No men.”
We spend the next few hours catching up, dancing carefully around the topics of Dimitri’s betrayal, Kallan, Koen, and my impending marriage, which is really doom disguised as duty.
For once, the weight of it doesn’t crush me.
For once, it feels like just two friends on a bed, talking.
Laughing. Pretending everything isn’t falling apart. I guess for her, it isn’t.
Eventually, exhaustion claims us. Sleep drags me under, mercifully dreamless.
It feels like mere minutes later when the door slams open, making me jolt awake.
“Good morning, ladies,” Dimitri’s voice rings, far too cheerful.
We both groan in unison. Ravelle snatches up a pillow and hurls it at him. He catches it with a smirk.
“Go away, Dimitri,” she mutters.
He ignores her. “I need to speak with you, Serenya. Both of you, get dressed and join me in the meeting room.” Just like that, he’s gone again, striding away with infuriating ease.
“I’m going to kill him,” I groan.
“Wait until after we marry,” Ravelle says with a wicked smirk. “When I become queen, then you can.”
I laugh as we pull ourselves out of bed and dress. She gives me an outfit like her own, but all black.
Together, we make our way to join Dimitri.
I take my seat at the long obsidian table. The room is quiet but heavy, lit by tall candles that flicker against map-covered stone walls. Noctheron’s royal meeting room is smaller than the one in Syltheriel, but it feels more intimate.
…And more suffocating.
Dimitri leans forward, fingers laced on the table, his expression unreadable. Ravelle sits beside him with arms crossed, gaze softer than Dimitri’s but no less focused.
Dimitri breaks the silence. “I wanted to wait until you were feeling stronger,” he begins. “But we can’t be sure how much time we have.”
My spine straightens instinctively. “This is about Elowen again.”
“Yes.”
I exhale through my nose, unwilling to meet his eyes. The tension between us hasn’t fully dissolved. I still can’t forget about the role he played in Kallan’s death.
He continues, “One of my sources just sent word. Elowen is searching for three ancient artifacts.”
My brow furrows. “Artifacts?”
“I don’t know the specifics yet,” he admits. “But my source suspects they are tied to the Veil.”
My heart skips. “What would she want with the Veil?”
“I don’t know,” he says. “However, we believe that she has already found one.”
My hands tighten in my lap.
Dimitri meets my eyes across the table. “I need your help. You know I can’t fight her alone. The Syltheriel court needs to understand what’s coming, and I can’t get that message across without you.”
I don’t answer.
Ravelle just watches, sensing the tension rise between us, no doubt.
Dimitri’s voice lowers. “Serenya, please. This is serious.”
I clench my jaw and drop my gaze to the table. “I can’t.”
Something in him snaps. “Why not?” He slams his hands on the table and rises halfway from his seat. “Why do you keep turning away from this? Why do you keep pretending it's nothing?”
“I’m not—”
“Then why?” he shouts, the calm king cracking. “Why are you acting like it doesn’t matter?”
I stay quiet.
“ Answer m— ”
“Because I’m scared!” I yell, my voice echoing.
Silence falls so quickly it rings in my ears. He slowly lowers himself back into his seat, stunned.
My voice cracks. “I’m scared.”
Dimitri’s tone softens. “Of what?”
I stare down at my hands. “He was supposed to rule with me. He wasn’t allowed in the trials because he was fae, and only humans can participate, but we were going to find a way around that.
A loophole. We were going to rule together.
King and queen. Side by side.” My throat tightens, and I press my lips together to keep from crying.
“I knew he would have made a good ruler. I never doubted that. But me?” I finally look up, tears threatening to fall. “I’m not so sure,” I whisper.
He doesn’t say anything, but Ravelle moves to sit next to me, reaching for my hand.
“I thought I was strong,” I say quietly.
“But lately…I’m breaking all the damn time.
I’ve lost him, I’ve lost myself, and now…
now I’m expected to lead? To—to stand up to Elowen?
To face all of this like I know what I’m doing?
Well, I don’t. ” I take a shaky breath. “I don’t know what I’m doing or who I even am without him. ”
For a long time, Dimitri says nothing. Then, he gently murmurs, “You were always going to be queen, Serenya. With or without him. That hasn’t changed.”
“But I never wanted it without him.” I hate how small my voice sounds.
He leans back in his chair, his anger gone, replaced by something quieter and sadder. Understanding. “I know. But maybe that’s exactly why you have to. For him. For what the two of you believed in.”
I wipe my eyes.
“And for the world he left behind,” he adds.
I don’t answer right away. My chest rises and falls in silence as I sit with the truth of my fear out in the open.
Dimitri’s words echo through my mind. With or without him.
I never imagined a future where I wore the crown, and Kallan wasn’t beside me, steady and smiling and strong. But now…there is just me.
…And maybe Koen.
That thought lingers at the edge of my mind, strange and soft, like a dream I am still not ready to acknowledge.
“Serenya, we need you. Please , ” Dimitri says softly.
I look up at him, my voice quiet but certain. “Okay. I’ll help you.”
His shoulders relax. The tension in his posture eases like a tide pulling back from shore. There is a flicker of relief in his eyes and something like pride.
“Are you sure?” he asks.
“No,” I admit with a small, sad laugh. “I’m still terrified.”
“Good. That means you understand the weight of it.”
“I’m not promising that I will be perfect,” I say. “But I won’t run from this anymore. I’ll do what I can. I’ll fight.”
He gives a short nod. “That’s all I ask.”
“You said Elowen has an artifact already. What is it?”
“I don’t know yet. I’ve sent word to every informant I trust and a few I don’t.” He offers a grim smile. “I’ll find out.”
“Then I will stay here. In Noctheron. Until I have to return to Syltheriel for the final trial.” It also gives me time away from Koen to sort out my feelings. I don’t say that, though.
That surprises him. “You will?”
I nod. “You’ve told me before that your library holds records older than any living memory.”
“It does.”
“Then I want to study them,” I say. “If Elowen is doing something with the Veil, maybe I can learn how to stop it. Or at least understand what she could even be trying to do. I thought the Veil was untouchable, just a place you pass through when you die.”
Dimitri stands slowly, a spark of hope returning to his voice. “We’ll find answers, Serenya. And when the time comes…we will face her together.”
“Alright.”
Ravelle steps forward to hug me. “Listen to me, Serenya. I know you try to come across like some perfect princess. Carved from stone, untouchable, always making the right call. Like you’ve got it all figured out.
And I know part of that is because that’s what everyone in Syltheriel expects from you.
“But you don’t have to be that with us. Not here. It’s okay to be scared. To mess up. To not know what to do next. No one gets through this life without stumbling. Not even you.
“That’s what friends are for—to carry some of the weight when it gets too heavy.” She pulls back, meeting my tear-filled eyes. “You are not alone.”
“Thank you,” I whisper.
The weight hasn’t lifted from my chest, but it’s shifted. I will carry it. I will own it. For Kallan. For my people.
We leave the meeting room and enter the dining hall.
The table is long, carved from the same black obsidian as the meeting room, set with polished silverware and bowls of fresh fruit and steaming bread.
The morning sun cuts through the tall windows—enchanted to let the sun shine in without hurting the vampires—glinting off the polished floor.
The smell of herbs and roasting meat fills the room.
I sit across from Dimitri and Ravelle again, still cautious of the space between us.
The silence is comfortable at first, only the soft clinking of silverware filling the air.
My thoughts wander to Koen, wondering if he’s safe.
I can feel the pull of him in the back of my mind, familiar and unrelenting.
Dimitri watches me closely, but instead of speaking, he simply hands me a plate of bread. Ravelle offers a small smile, one that reaches her eyes, gentle and quiet. It makes me miss the trust that once existed between us all.
I steal another glance at Dimitri. He meets my gaze. In his eyes, I see the patience that he’s always had for only me, a willingness to endure my cautious edge.
“Eat,” he says softly. “You need strength.”
I nod, breaking off a piece of bread. We eat slowly, and as the minutes stretch, Ravelle catches Dimitri up on all the things that happened while he was with me.
I laugh quietly at the mishaps, feeling the weight inside me lift.
Dimitri watches, a small shadow of a smile ghosting across his features.
I begin to feel what Ravelle said—even though I’m scared, I am not entirely alone. Perhaps this is the first step in learning how to move forward without abandoning the past.