53. Loveleena
LOVELEENA
For the first time since arriving at the Academy, Loveleena was truly on edge.
Not because no one would talk about Park, which still angered her, and not because she was inches from a Soul Snatcher ripping her soul away, but because the secret she had been hiding for her entire life was seeping out of her.
Humans didn’t have magic.
Most humans didn’t have magic.
But she did.
And she had known ever since she was a child when it would spark in tiny bursts. It was Gina, her family cook, who had taken her aside one day and slowly, methodically, taught her how to control it enough to keep it at bay.
She had kept it a secret for years.
When Park disappeared, it surged up once again, bubbling below her skin.
If she were ever caught, it would have been her immediate death.
History wasn’t kind to humans that claimed to have creature magic.
They were executed or deemed to have the creature sickness and sent beyond the wall.
But the loss of her best friend made her reckless, and sometimes she would let it surface.
Usually to steal.
It was how she stole Ren’s dagger when she caught him at the Great Wall.
And how she stole many things she could easily afford.
Lady Shadows wasn’t just immune to her antics. Stealing the tully made her realize Lady Shadows was also immune to her magic. Something she would have to unpack at another time. The elders always seemed to guard a web of knowledge. One that you could never quite untangle.
Yes, she knew she had the gift of illusion.
She could shift and shape reality around her to create false experiences.
Distractions so vivid that no one could tell what was real and what wasn’t.
But she had spent most of her life in denial.
It was easier to pretend she didn’t—easier to control.
She was so used to only letting it out in such small bursts; the illusion she created in front of her entire squad during shadows had been her biggest—and most uncontrolled—expression of it yet.
Mainly because the Soul Snatcher terrified her. Her body—her magic—reacted instinctively.
But there was no way she was going to let it happen again. She had to keep it at bay and the best way to do that was to pretend it didn’t exist. To distract herself, she focused on trying to figure out what the Soul Snatcher had meant when it said it was there to check up on someone.
Check up on who? It had to be someone in the Slayer shadow squad.
She sat, chewing on a hangnail, thinking it over.
Curiosity ate away at her, until she finally found herself shuffling through the halls well after midnight, headed for the one place she knew Ahmina would be.
The whole school gossiped in every corner about the events of the previous day.
Alongside her own name, she’d heard whispers about Ahmina. Maybe she would know something.
The library was quiet this time of night; most students had gone to bed. Still, she wasn’t surprised to find Ahmina tucked away behind a stack of books at a table on the second floor.
“Is your brain bleeding yet?” she said as she plopped down beside her, startling Ahmina.
“Honestly, yes,” Ahmina said rubbing her temple.
Loveleena pulled down a book from the top of the stack not bothering to read the cover. Its contents didn’t interest her in the slightest, but she pretended to read it until she thought of what to say.
“Did you need something?” Ahmina interrupted her thoughts. “I’m trying to study.”
Loveleena sighed, putting down the book. Best to just come out with it then. “You were there. You saw what happened with the Soul Snatcher. I can’t make sense of it.”
Ahmina shifted uncomfortably. “I’ve heard the rumors. But I was too far away to see it myself. The creature was hidden in the trees.”
“I heard you took on a Blood Bear?”
“I mean I didn’t really take it on…”
“It didn’t kill you?”
“Obviously not?”
Her sassiness made Loveleena smile. “Try to kill you, I mean.”
Ahmina just shook her head.
“The Soul Snatcher didn’t kill me either. Obviously.” She gave her a reproachful look. “But why?”
Ahmina snapped her book closed, her temper short. “Listen. I honestly don’t know and I don’t have the time to try and figure it out. Not all of us are natural Defenders, you know. Some of us have to work for it.”
Loveleena took the hint and got up to leave, but Ahmina grabbed her wrist. “Wait.” She squeezed the bridge of her nose.
“I’m sorry. That was uncalled for. It’s just…
been a lot.” She looked around as if realizing where she was for the first time and let out a heavy breath.
“I’ve been cramming all day.” She gestured to the stack of books.
“Did the Blood Bear speak into your mind?”
Loveleena could tell her directness shocked Ahmina, because she cursed at her, and told her to keep her voice down. She watched Ahmina ponder her question, as if debating how much to say. “You’re sure that it spoke to you?”
Loveleena nodded.
“Don’t tell anyone, but the day before Initiation, I saw a Soul Snatcher in the library garden. It spoke into my mind. I had forgotten about it until now…” Ahmina’s eyes glazed over, lost in a memory.
Loveleena didn’t dare speak. Ahmina was opening up to her and she didn’t want to ruin it by saying the wrong thing.
After a long pause, Ahmina continued, “There was a book I read when I was younger. It was from Elder Muaka’s private collection, and it was scribed in old Jarrian.
It was difficult to read because I had to translate much of it, but I remember getting bits and pieces of stories about…
” She lowered her voice to a whisper. “Relations between creatures and humans.”
Loveleena sat back down, listening intently. “Relations? You mean like sex?”
“No!” Ahmina cried, garnering looks from the few other students who were still left in the library.
“No! Gross!” she repeated in a whisper. “One story in particular described a man who had spoken to creatures in his mind. I always thought the stories odd. But that book, and a few others, are some of the oldest texts of our history.”
Loveleena played with a strand of hair and tried to act casual. “Do you think the creatures track us, like we do them?”
Ahmina frowned. “There’s an old Jarrian saying, kuna la tandra.
It means that only a fool believes they know everything.
Elder Muaka used to tell me that there are a lot of things hidden.
Things we have yet to know or understand.
” She paused, deep in thought. “I think creatures, magic, and the history of Jarrah are more complicated than most of us would like to admit.”
Loveleena thanked Ahmina and left, the truth circling her mind all the way back to her dorm. For the first time since she came to the Academy, her anger, grief, and resentment was overshadowed by her desperate need to keep her magic a secret.
Park was still missing. Ren was sneaking out of the Academy to do only the Moon Goddess knew what. Her magic was exposing itself completely out of her control, and creatures were quite literally speaking to her telepathically.
She ordered herself to forget her magic. Distract herself if necessary. Regardless of what Kumani or anyone else thought. And stay focused on finding Park.