Chapter 7
Chapter seven
Shea
I stifled a yawn as I shuffled into the kitchen, tugging Trooper’s T-shirt over my head.
The fabric was soft against my skin, and it smelled like him—a hint of whiskey, with sharp citrus soap, and earthy leather.
My muscles were pleasantly sore from last night and I smiled to myself at the memory.
I couldn’t remember the last time someone made me come that hard.
But there was no doubt that it would change things between us. Trooper made it clear from day one that long term relationships weren’t his thing. This wasn’t going to end in happily ever after and I had to keep my expectations in check.
Friends with benefits might suit us better. I wouldn’t be opposed to that. The tricky part would be making sure I didn’t get too attached.
After starting the coffee maker, I grabbed a box of leftover pizza from the refrigerator and settled at the kitchen table. I found a stray ballpoint pen and started doodling designs on the inside of the pizza box lid out of habit.
Ever since I was a kid, I always doodled on everything without even realizing what I was doing half the time. It was just an instinct or a nervous tic. It cleared my head and helped me to think better.
I was so wrapped up in what I was doing that I didn’t hear Trooper enter the kitchen, scrubbing a hand through his hair.
“Good morning, gorgeous,” he rumbled, sliding his arms around my waist from behind.
I smiled with a contented little purr, leaning back into his embrace. God, it felt so damn good to be held. As much as I hated to admit it, Raine was right—I was long overdue to get laid. And it had been years since I actually had feelings for someone like this.
Trooper nuzzled into my neck and heaved a sigh. He was only wearing his jeans, and his tattooed skin was still warm from sleep.
“Pizza does not count as breakfast, honey,” he said, his voice gravelly and low.
A jolt of need melted down my spine at that sound, hot and aching between my thighs.
“Don’t judge me,” I countered lightly. “I’m hungry, and you know I hate to cook. Besides, your diet isn’t any better than mine. I know for a fact that you don’t have a single vegetable in your refrigerator, Trooper.”
I held up a slice of pizza over my shoulder. He took a bite, sliding his hands under the hem of my T-shirt. His callused palms were deliciously rough against the softness of my skin as he caressed my hips, kneading my ass.
“So,” he mumbled against my shoulder. “We’re back to Trooper. Not Theo.”
The pizza turned to a lump in my throat and I tossed the remnants of my slice back into the box. Then I turned around to face him. He lifted his head to meet my gaze. I traced along the tattoo over his heart—the one I did for him when we first met at Hotline.
A military rifle, with a helmet and an American flag, to commemorate his fallen brothers, and those who managed to survive alongside him.
“Theo was a moment of weakness,” I admitted.
He hummed, trailing his fingers in mesmerizing circles over my lower belly.
“Ah. A moment of weakness. That’s not really your style, is it?”
I shook my head.
“Nope. The stress relief was greatly appreciated though. I wouldn’t mind doing that again.”
Trooper said nothing apart from a tight-lipped smile that didn’t reach his eyes. No witty response. No sarcastic comeback. I thought he would be thrilled at the prospect of no-strings-attached sex. Instead, he seemed…disappointed? Maybe even offended?
“Or not,” I added, trying to laugh it off. “I didn’t think I was that bad in bed.”
“You weren’t,” Trooper replied.
“The sour grapes expression on your face says otherwise.”
A shadow flickered across his eyes and he moved away to the counter, retrieving two mugs from my cabinet for coffee.
He’d been in my house often enough that he knew his way around without asking for directions.
Seeing him standing there, half naked, with his bedhead and his jeans unbuttoned, hanging low on his hips… a pang hit me in the chest.
There was a comfortable, domestic quality to this moment that I’d never really experienced with anyone else before. Trooper—Theo—fit into my life as easily as breathing. He looked good in my kitchen, as if he had always belonged here.
He placed one of the mugs on the table before me and leaned back against the counter, sipping his coffee.
“What if I don’t want to be fuck buddies?” he said at last.
I shrugged.
“Then we’ll call it a one-night-stand and be done with it.”
“That’s not what I meant.”
I blinked at Trooper, waiting for him to clarify. It was so damn quiet between us and I found myself holding my breath with expectation.
After a few seconds, he set his cup aside on the counter and crossed his arms.
“I’m not talking about hooking up. I’m talking about something serious.”
Understanding hit me like a freight train. I blew out a breath, rubbing my forehead. At first, a little thrill zipped up my spine. Then I felt exposed and ridiculous, wearing nothing but Trooper’s T-shirt. I wished I had panties for this conversation at least.
“That’s not really your style, is it?” I pointed out, mimicking his earlier response.
“I’d be willing to give it a shot.”
Shaking my head, I closed the pizza box and shoved it back in the fridge.
I was flattered that he would make an exception for me.
But at the same time, a knot tightened in my chest. What if it didn’t work out?
What if we broke up and things were weird between us?
What if I lost my friend because he left me just like every other man in my life ever did?
Trooper looped an arm around my waist, pulling me back against him.
“This came out of left field for me, too,” he said gently. “We don’t have to make a decision right now. We can think about it for a while.”
Was that better or worse? To have this hanging over our heads, lingering, undecided.
My cell phone rang—a distant echo from the region of my bedroom. Relief flooded through me, grateful for an excuse to change the subject.
“I should get that,” I said, pulling out of Trooper’s arms.
He sighed as I fled the room. And I couldn’t help noticing the irony of the situation.
This time, Trooper was the one who wanted to stay. While I was running away as fast as I could.
Raine called to let me know that the two employees who were supposed to man the shop called in sick. So, I could either close up for the day, or cover their shift myself. After a quick shower and a change of clothes, I was more than ready to get back to work.
Trooper leaned against my bedroom door frame, fully clothed this time, with a frown while I sat on the foot of my bed to lace up my boots.
“I thought you were going to lay low for a few days,” he said.
“Yeah, but if I close the shop, I lose money,” I countered. “And I need to pay rent.”
“There are plenty of people who would help you with that, Shea.”
I shot him a look as I rose to my feet. He should know better—I wouldn’t take charity. And besides, I couldn’t bear to be in this house with him after…
I’m not talking about hooking up. I’m talking about something serious.
Working would give me something to do. Something to take my mind off…all of this. Trooper pressed his lips together like he wanted to protest further, but he stopped himself from doing so. He glanced at his phone, tapping out a text.
“Viper will be on watch today,” he said. “After that, it will be Ironside or Bruiser, depending on their availability.”
“Is there a reason you haven’t given Psycho any watch duty yet?” I prodded. “Are you still holding a grudge against him for hitting on me that one time?”
Trooper grunted and stowed his phone in his back pocket.
“You’re a smart woman. I’m sure you can figure out that answer yourself.”
I blew out a breath and shook my head.
“Wow. You really are jealous.”
Trooper stepped into my bedroom. My heart rose into my throat.
This was the only room in the house that he had never entered—my intimate personal sanctuary.
He curved a hand over my hip, brushing his lips to the corner of my mouth.
Goosebumps shivered along my skin at his touch.
It took every ounce of willpower to resist the urge to sink into his embrace all over again.
Before I could stop myself, I draped my arms around Trooper’s neck, bringing our bodies flush together.
“I meant what I said,” he replied softly. “You’re worth staying for.”
I wanted to believe him. I wanted to picture a future together—raising a family, growing old, building a life and a home that was all ours.
But it would be like the blind leading the blind. Neither of us knew what the fuck we were doing, and it had a greater probability of falling apart than succeeding.
I didn’t say any of that though. This thing between us was destined to be short-lived enough already. For now, I would bask in it a little while longer before it came to an end.
“I have to go,” I whispered. “I’m ten minutes late as it is.”
Trooper sighed and released me. But before I reached the door, he spoke.
“Let me drive you to work. Then I can pick you up and take you to dinner afterward.”
I stopped and half turned toward him.
“Are you asking me on a date?”
He shrugged.
“Technically, you could say we had a date last night. But we don’t have time to argue pesky little details like that.”
“Just because we don’t have time to argue, doesn’t mean you won the non-existent argument,” I pointed out.
Trooper chuckled and came over, threading our fingers together, kissing the back of my hand with a gleam in his eyes. My stomach somersaulted. Fuck, I couldn’t do this. I couldn’t fall in love with him. It would only break my heart when he inevitably moved on.
“I guess we’ll have to pick up this discussion later tonight over dinner,” he said. “And maybe, if I’m a very, very lucky man, we can play around with those toys you mentioned.”
I huffed with amusement and shook my head, letting Trooper lead me out to his motorcycle. After strapping on our helmets, I settled behind him on the bike and huddled against his back, wrapping my arms around his middle.
“Is this why you wanted to drive me?” I asked, practically shouting to be heard over the roar of his engine. “You were looking for an excuse to be the little spoon?”
He grinned and hit the gas, speeding out of my driveway. I yelped and clutched onto him tighter, burying my face in the back of his neck with the wind stinging my cheeks and the road flying by beneath us.