Chapter 19
19
Aidan
A nd there it is.
The look on her face, the sounds that she makes, the moment she falls apart, it’s all I’ll ever need again. And I follow her. Every muscle in my body tightens, contracts, and then relaxes as we both shudder, panting to catch our breath.
After tossing the condom into the bin, I slide back in bed and wrap myself around her. Her hand in mine, both of them pressed firmly to my heart. This feels like more.
More than a shag, more than a fling.
Just more.
The moment she gave herself over to me, needed me and asked for, pleaded for my help, something changed. Lisbeth has been burned and burned badly, but in that moment of putting her needs and desires first, something shifted.
She trusted me.
And I want to cherish and honor this.
Feeling her heart beat and listening to her soft, even breaths, I lose myself to a sleep I’ve not slept since arriving in Beekman Hills.
Several hours later, I only just register the sounds of the boys coming home from the pub. I can hear everything in this fucking loft and usually they’re louder than a pack of wild dogs when they come in after work.
Lis’ things strewn about, and my fucking shirt on the floor down there must not be lost on Finn and Jimmy. The volume drops and other than a few whispers and a quiet chuckle, I hear little else.
The thought crosses my mind, with her body pressed up against me, to wake her and have her. Have her again. But as much as I can hear them downstairs, they can hear every move I make up here. This thing we have between us is not something I’m willing to share. I won’t do that to her, she’s mine.
Trust.
I wake with Lisbeth’s head in the crook of my shoulder and a hand on her hip. My other hand, though. It’s resting on my chest—with hers pressed firmly between it and my heart. Like she owns it. Like it’s hers. I lie there relishing this for as long as I can. My body screaming for another go. To explore every curve, hear every sigh, every moan. And like a bucket of cold water, those thoughts are washed away. Those sounds are just for me. Mine. I’ll not take advantage and share that with anyone, especially the two arseholes sleeping below us.
Sliding from the warmth of her body, I grab my jeans and head downstairs for coffee. As it brews, I look through the fridge taking note that there’s still bacon and eggs. I’ll make Lis breakfast when she wakes and then dive right in—to studying, helping her.
I grab my phone and steaming cuppa, stepping out onto our minuscule deck. Three texts and a missed call. Mostly work—photography inquiries, but there’s one from Lorna.
Lorna: Hey. Sorry for not getting back to you before now. Can we talk? Soon? xx
Aidan: Yeah. I’m committed to something for a couple days…I’ll call.
Aidan: Sunday?
Lorna: Yeah. Good.
She’s yet to tell me about the baby. We’re going to need more than a quick chat for this.
Liam’s seen her a couple times since we talked, but I can’t figure why she’s been avoiding me. It’s got to be tearing her up. They had been trying for a family before my brother’s diagnosis. Jesus. I still can’t believe how quickly he went. Fucking cancer.
“You look like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders.” Her soft voice washes over me as Lis ghosts her fingers lightly down my spine, a trail of goose bumps showing in its wake. She presses a small kiss to the Celtic cross on my shoulder. I reach behind me, grabbing her hand from where it rests low on my back and pull her into my arms.
“Hmmm… Just thinking of some things going on in Dublin.” This moment doesn’t need to be ruined by my brother’s death. I’ll tell her later, when she’s not worried about her studies. Leaning in and taking the kiss I want—need—the topic is laid to rest.
“Coffee’s ready. We can get back to your studies after breakfast,” I murmur, bringing her hand to my lips to press a soft kiss to her knuckles.
Inside the kitchen, I push her up against the counter, trapping her. Molding my body to hers, as close as I can, feeling every curve. I take a final kiss and tear myself away from her to hide adjusting my cock. The last thing I want is for her to think that’s all I’m after.
The moment I turn to hand her a cup of coffee, she meets me with a warm cloth, rubbing away the ink trails from my shoulder and chest. She’s so gentle with me. Trading coffee for the cloth, I rub at the marks and have them just about taken care of when Jimmy stumbles out of his room to plop down at the table. In his fucking boxers.
“Making the eggs? There tea or just feckin’ coffee?” I want to smack him upside the head, but he at least gets us back on track. “Mornin’, Lis.”
And, of course—fucking of course—Finn shows his face only when the smell of bacon fills the flat. Grabbing his plate, he pulls a chair up next to Lis. “You the reason I couldn’t sleep?”
“What? No…” Lisbeth stutters as her neck flushes pink.
“Thought that was you I heard screamin’ all night.” Finn winks, thinking he’s being funny, but Lis is uncomfortable and I’ll be kickin’ his arse soon. I’ll kill him.
“Finn.” Jimmy lifts his head from the table, shooting him a warning.
“I’m going to go…um…” Her words get lost in the embarrassment swirling around her as she escapes up to my loft.
“Christ, Finn. Are you fuckin’ stupid? Why would you do that?” I growl, hands clenched, muscles quivering. “She— fuck —no fuckin’ class. Might want to look at yourself—see why you’re not near as slick with the girls as you think you are. Fuckin’ arsehole.” I pace the length of the small kitchen trying to keep calm. “Out. I need you out of the flat today.”
“Jimmy’s on at the bar, I’ve all day to hang out wit’ you.” Finn grins, oblivious of just how close I am to throwing him out of the flat right now.
“No. Out,” I grit out as I turn my back to them. “Get the fuck out, and don’t come back ’til tomorrow. Fuckin’ bastard. Don’t think I won’t kick your sorry arse.” Their grumbles follow me as I launch my body up the stairs, taking them two at a time. Finn will feel bad and apologize once Jimmy gets it through his thick skull what he did to fuck up, but for now, I can’t be near him.
Crawling across the bed to her, I wrap my fingers around her wrists and I settle myself in front of her. “Lisbeth. Don’t let him…”
“It’s fine. I’m fine. Maybe I should just go. Study at my place.”
“He’s goin’.” I rub circles with my thumbs—caressing that spot—bring one wrist and then the other to my lips, planting a soft kiss on each. “He’ll be gone all day. Stay. Please. Jimmy’s goin’ to work. We’ll study and get you sorted. Please—let me do this. Let me help you.”
“Your accent changes depending on what’s happening.” The smile creeps up her lips.
“What?”
“It does. When you’re mad,” she leans in, “when you’re drinking,” her warm hands slide up my legs, “and when you’re…” She squeezes high on my thighs, her thumbs pressing in right by my cock.
“When I’m what?” Every time she moves, the subtle scent of her perfume teases me.
“When…” Her eyes go straight for my crotch, making my cock twitch.
“When I fuck ye?” I want to push her back and bury myself in her for the rest of the day. I want to hear my name on her lips. I want to make her scream, the way Finn was talking about. I want her to forget he said that shit. “They’re still downstairs, love. Much as I want to, I don’t want to share you. Not with them here to listen.”
We’re wrapped up in each other’s breaths, hands twined through her hair, pulling her in. My lips sweep across hers; she darts her tongue out, licking my bottom one. Fuck. Her name comes out on a groan as she palms my cock, and rakes her teeth across my lip. Biting me. Squeezing me. She’s pushing this. She knows we’re not totally alone and she’s still going. Working me up, making me hard.
The sound of the shower starting fills the loft as the front door slams. I pitch forward, shoving her into the mattress, silently pulling at her clothes and we spend the rest of the day completely wrapped up in each other. Finn stays away and Jimmy must find someone to go home from the bar with.
The flat is ours alone.
We spend hours studying for her exam until she knows her material inside and out. When Lis finishes packing away her books and papers late in the evening, I set her bag by the front door.
I grasp her hand and lead her back up to my room and study the subject I’ve been yearning for all day. Her . What makes her sigh, gasp, and tremble. What makes her blush and beg for more.
Her test is early Friday and I wake to the mattress shifting as she tries to leave. Wrapping my hand around her hip, I pull her back to me. “Aidan, I need to go.” God, I don’t like the feeling of her leaving my bed.
“Just five more minutes.” I drag her so she’s lying almost on top of me, her heart aligned perfectly with mine—beating with mine.
“I have to go home and clean up—change before my test,’’ she murmurs into my chest dragging her fingers across my stomach. “And I don’t want the weirdness from yesterday, again. I didn’t mean to spend the night?—”
“They didn’t come back, either of them. Take a shower here. I’ll get you coffee and something to eat on your way.” Squeezing her tight to me, pressing a kiss to the top of her head, I untangle us and leave the only place I want to spend my day.
After Lis leaves with a bagel in one hand and her coffee in the other, I try calling Lorna but get nothing. No answer. Nothing Saturday. Nothing Sunday. Late in the day Monday, just as I catch Lis’ eye through the window of the bistro, Lorna phones. The tears are heavy in her voice and there is no way—no way—I can have this conversation in a bar. Closing my eyes, I back away just barely registering Lis’ expression as I turn and head to my car for what can only be a heart-wrenchingly emotional conversation.
“Aidan—please come home.”