Chapter 30
Ava
My snooze rang a third time. Now I really had to get up. Extending my arms and legs, I arched my back in a luxurious stretch. Flavors from last night lingered on my tongue like a mint. Tingly. Refreshing. Two more workdays, I told myself.
My flouncy yellow top called to me, paired best with Bermuda shorts. Nina ran upstairs while I smoothed my hair into a high ponytail, holding back a massive yawn. I just had to survive until six. Then I could pick up takeout and collapse on the couch. Maybe Eli would join me?
We had experienced everything all at once, skipped so many intimate steps. Yet my pulse still raced at the thought of the coffee he’d present me when I entered the kitchen, and the chance hand on my thigh as we watched a show.
I wrapped the ponytail holder four times around my fisted hair.
I wouldn’t say the L-word, but maybe I could think it?
Everything about him made me smile. His compassion, his patience, his sense of responsibility.
Those arms! Two days or twenty-four, I recognized the blooming fullness in my chest. It was foolish to pretend I didn’t.
And if last night was any indication, he felt the same. I never thought I would care this way for anyone again. But suddenly I felt alive. Eager to push forward. I forgot how much I liked having a teammate.
I grabbed my purse and hustled to the den stairs, checking my phone to see if I even had time for coffee. When I looked up, Eli was padding down. He stopped on the tread above me, the subtle zest of his soap hitting me full force.
A tendril of that blooming fullness split my face into a smile. “Good morning.”
Without a word, he slid his hands under my jaw and brought our mouths together in a prolonged, chaste-ish kiss.
But then a little noise squeaked out of me, and the mood shifted.
Intention followed in a slow, aching urge as strong, capable hands traveled south, past my waist, curving around my butt.
Eli crowded me to the wall, the handrail pressing into my back.
Teeth and tongue intruded on any reasonable arguments. This was my new favorite wake-up.
For a few fleeting moments, I considered skipping work and dragging him to my bedroom. Except Nina needed breakfast. As if sensing my resolve, he broke off the knee-buckling kiss with a low and seductive, “Good morning.”
“Mmm.” Agreed. Zero regrets.
“I got Nina some cereal.”
“Thank you.”
“And coffee is ready.”
I frowned.
He tsked and pressed his fingertips into the sides of my mouth to lift them. “Nope. None of that.”
My puddle of a heart couldn’t deny it. The man was hard-working, humble, and sexy as hell. And I wanted all of him. “I just realized I don’t know how you drink your coffee.”
A sly smile spread across his features like a leisurely sunrise. “Any way I can get it.”
“I meant, do you prefer it with milk? Or sugar?”
“I know what you meant. I’m not gonna tell you. Making your coffee is my thing.”
“Humph.”
He kissed my cheek. “You’re cute when you pout.”
My bottom lip jutted out. “I’m not pouting. I’m just … You promised coffee, yet you’re holding me captive in a stairwell.”
Eli grinned, sneaking in one more quick press to my lips, then he released me.
Me and my big mouth.
Nina sat at the table in the kitchen, glaring at her Rice Krispies as if Eli had given her roadkill.
I ruffled her hair. “What’s wrong?”
She shushed me, then stuck her ear closer to the bowl. In a sly attempt, I wandered to the island where Eli had left his mug. He caught on and swiped it, but not before I glimpsed the deep, rich brown liquid. No milk, then.
“I know what you’re doing,” he said.
“Sugar?”
He shrugged, turning to face me with his cup at his mouth. “Doesn’t matter ‘cause I’m always gonna have it ready for you first.”
A girl could get used to that. But because I didn’t want it going to his head, “You’ll slip, eventually.”
“You think so?”
I turned my back on his cocky expression, addressing Nina. “Eat, baby.”
In response, she pounded her spoon into the wood next to her bowl, chanting something that sounded Viking.
“Nina.”
“Chun-chun-chun-chun.”
“Go,” Eli said, suddenly right behind me. His words tickled the base of my neck. “We’re good here.” When a kiss brushed on my vertebrae, it turned me spineless.
The forecasted high of 114 had nothing on me.
He wrapped his arm around my waist and pressed a cup of coffee into one hand, a food container in the other. “Don’t be late for work.”
Then stop touching me!
Nina glanced up with a strange expression. I slid out of Eli’s hold and gave her a big, handless hug. She’d never seen me act like that, not with Steven. But I wanted her to know what love looked like. “See you when I get home, Crackerjack,” I told her. And to Eli, “You too. Thanks for breakfast.”
Around lunchtime, I smiled into my store-bought sub as I read my texts.
Eli: Make sure you eat.
Ava: Or what? You’ll throw me over your shoulder?
Eli: No. I think you’d like that too much ;)
He wasn’t wrong. I returned to browsing Rock ‘N Roll’s stock for ideas.
What to use for the wandering footpaths through Hidden Meadows?
Wandering like Eli’s tongue down my stomach.
I shook my head, blinked back to my screen.
And the parking lot? Something to reduce dust?
My employee discount would help, but when did everything get so expensive?
Cathy’s head popped in the doorway of the office trailer. “Ava, can we chat?” Outside, the backhoes groaned and shoveled mulch and rock by the tons into pickups and delivery trucks.
I minimized my browser window and set my sandwich on its plastic wrap. I’d expected this. Especially after the drama of a large custom delivery. “Sure.”
The door slapped shut behind her. She sat in the clear plastic Ikea chair on the other side of my desk.
“I know you have a young child,” she started.
“And things come up. Illness, car problems …” She exhaled, her forehead a wrinkled mountainscape.
“But I’m concerned about how many days you’ve been out in the short time you’ve worked here. ”
It looked as hard for her to say as it was for me to hear. I shoved down the panic and tried not to spiral into all that losing this job might mean.
“This position is the hub of the entire business,” she went on. “It’s near impossible to keep things flowing when I don’t have someone here.”
“I know,” I told her. “And this may mean nothing to you, but these past few weeks have been the first of my life where I’ve been so unreliable. I wasn’t lying in my interview. I am dependable and hard-working.”
Cathy crossed a leg over her knee and leaned forward, resting her elbows on the edge of the desk. “I have to ask. Is this going to keep happening?”
I knew the answer she wanted. I knew my job depended on it. In fairness to her and her business, I gave her the same integrity I’d want from my own employees one day.
“My life is in flux right now,” I admitted. “I wish I could promise things would stop coming up. But I don’t know.”
She nodded. “Well, I appreciate your honesty.”
“I have a more stable … situation now. If that helps.” A house Steven can’t get himself involved with. Someone who makes my coffee in the morning. And makes me come at night.
Ah! These thoughts had to stop!
If my face turned red, Cathy didn’t comment. “Good.” She leaned back. “I like you, Ava. You’re great with my guys. Great with the customers.”
Her praise felt undeserved. “I’m so sorry about the custom order. Is there any way we can return it to the manufacturer?”
She waved a dismissive hand. “We’ll put it on the floor. It’s more costly than our standard stock, but someone will buy it.” She studied me. “Let’s give it one more chance?”
“Thank you, Cathy.”
“You’re welcome.” Her eyes fell on my turkey and cheddar hoagie. “And now, I think I’ll get me one of those.”
As she stood, I forced my penitent smile into a grateful one.
I needed this job. For stability in my transition, for my property loan.
Speaking of … When she left, I picked up my phone, called the bank, and scheduled a loan appointment for the following day.
Terry kept finding holes and concerns in my business plan.
I worried the more I put it off, the less sure he’d feel about our deal.
And could I blame him? He had plans, too.
What if, in guilting him to sell to me, I was wrecking his retirement?
Don’t go there. Terry was a grown man. If this didn’t work for him, he’d say so.
Fine. Settled. I would go to the bank and explain my situation. And hopefully, they’d looked at my long-term income history, not just the past thirty days. Ugh. How much easier would this have been if Jason were still alive?
I picked up my sandwich, but found I’d lost my appetite.
This distracted, half-finished, mistake-ridden version of me soured my stomach.
I could do better. By the end of my shift, my eyes may have burned with desert intensity dryness, but my heart fluttered at the thought of seeing Eli.
Until I discovered a black Mercedes parked next to my truck.
“Now what?”
As I approached Roxy, Steven popped up next to the rear driver’s side tire. I studied his overlong, unruly hair, the shadow of neglected scruff on his face that shouted neither mysterious nor sexy, and his wrinkled T-shirt. T-shirt? What the heck?
My hackles rose. “What are you doing?”
He seemed at a loss for words.
“Steven. What are you doing?”
“I–you …” He tucked something into his rear pocket.
My eyes jumped to my tire, then back to him. “Are you slashing my tires?”
“No!”
“What’s in your pocket?” It felt like I was talking to a kid.
I dumped my purse on the hood of my Chevy and marched up to him, but he skittered around the trunk of his luxury sedan. I didn’t have the energy to chase him. It was too hot, and I was too tired.
He pried his door open and stuck a foot in, like it was home base. “Terry deserves better.”
“Excuse me?”
“He’s like family to you, right? He could be set for life. It’s selfish how stubborn you’re being.”
I gaped at him.
His bony fingers curled around the doorframe of his getaway car. “You can’t fight a corporation, Ava. They don’t care about you, me, or Terry. It’s all about capital.” With that warning, he ducked into his leather interior and sped off.
What. The. Funnel cake? Did he start using drugs? I examined my tire, running a palm over the scorching rubber, but I found no punctures. Would I see it, though? Tilting my ear to the wheel well, I listened for a hiss or a sputter. Nothing.
I stood, staring at the tire, unease rising. AAA could check the pressure and see if it was dropping. But how long would I wait for them to show up? I could call Eli. Nope. How dumb would it look if it ended up being nothing? And did I need an angry bodyguard out for Steven’s blood?
If it had a hole, and if I took it slow, avoided the freeway, I’d probably be able to make it to the ranch.
I climbed into my truck and drove it carefully out of the parking lot, listening to the road sounds, trying to remember the usual cadence of the tread.
Was it bumpier? Louder? Several stoplights later, I relaxed, concluding that if something was amiss, I would’ve noticed.
Adrenaline yielded to lethargy. A massive yawn made my eyes water, and as I stared at the long stretch of intersections, Steven’s comment surfaced, unbidden. I wasn’t being selfish, was I? Except the words weren’t novel. I’d been thinking them already.
Terry had always talked about his big cross-country trip. How comfortable would he be living out of that old trailer? Climbing up to the narrow bed loft with his achy joints?
My phone pinged with a message from Eli.
Eli: Thinking about you
He attached a selfie of him and Nina doing a bicep curl with small hand weights.
A genuine smile lifted my spirits. He had appeared in my life so unexpectedly.
It fueled me with hope. It reminded me why places like Bill’s ranch and Hidden Meadows existed.
Not because of money. I’d figure out some way to get Terry his new trailer.
But in that moment, the four-lane road stretched peacefully, sparse of cars.
An easy straightaway. No thought or planning needed. I just had to follow the road home.
Home.
The no-name ranch was just supposed to be a stopover.
But somewhere along the way, it turned familiar, comfortable.
A place I could slump into the kitchen, still wearing my PJs.
A place full of people I could rely on. And Nina was so happy, with the non-stop giggles, and the excited, long-winded summaries of her days.
Was it ambitious to want both? Hidden Meadows and whatever came with loving Eli?
Surely, the universe wouldn’t have sent me what I couldn’t keep?
As I approached an intersection, another huge yawn broke free. The kind that demanded the entire face. The kind you can’t cut short. I squinted through blurry eyes at the stoplight. And I thought it was green.
I swore I saw green.
The following seconds ran together. Honking. Bang! The world flipped. I couldn’t tell up from down. Couldn’t put the wind back in my lungs.
Crunching. Spinning.
My windshield became a mosaic. In a bizarre, withdrawn moment, it reminded me of a house Steven had listed on the top of the hill with the designer bathroom.
So many windows. So much light diffused by crackled glass panes.
I would’ve bought the house for the bathroom alone, but the asking price was more than I could afford.
I could afford. Afford …
I gasped. My seatbelt was choking me, and my pulse swished so loud in my ears it was all I could hear. Shadows crept into the edges of my vision, punctuated by sharp points of pain. Little stars. But it’s daytime? I blinked, trying to clear them away.
I needed to call someone. To tell them I’d be home late. To tell Nina not to worry. But the little stars swelled until the pain grew unbearable.
So, I closed my eyes.