Chapter 36
Hazel
It was our last day, and a bittersweet taste lingered in my mouth. However, the sweetness was strongly overpowered by the bitterness, so I decided to push it aside until the inevitable end of this trip. I wanted to soak in the happiness all around me.
We were at a local winery, sipping different wines. I wasn’t an expert, but I quickly learned that red made me sluggish and tipsy, white was too dry and gave me headaches, but rosé was the perfect blend of summer and ease.
Luke was sitting next to me, deep in conversation with others.
I studied his sun-kissed face and effortlessly messy hair that actually took more effort than one would think.
The slight stubble was making him look older and somehow wiser.
He ran a hand through his hair, which I’d discovered was a turn-on for me, and caught me watching him.
“See something you like?” He immediately grinned. Warmth spread to my cheeks.
“I’m just trying to figure out how someone who thrives on late nights and questionable life choices still has skin this good,” I deflected, and he knew, cocking his head to the side.
“I blame the barista and her coffee from across the street where I work,” he leaned in and whispered, “I think she doses it with something.”
I smirked. “Unfortunately, we don’t have cinnamon-scented humility.”
“I can’t give away all my secrets,” he says, the corner of his lips curling. “You already know too much, being the only one who’s seen me getting ready in the morning.”
I knew he was just flirting, but it made me feel good. I absolutely hated it.
“Yeah, well, I’ve seen your—” I tried to come up with a snarky reply, but my phone pinged in my pocket, interrupting me.
“Whoosh,” Luke murmured, hiding his smile in the glass. “Saved by the bell.”
I might have smiled at his joke if not for Dad’s name on the screen. My mind drifted elsewhere. He kept pushing the publishing job, but I didn’t think I was ready. It wasn’t even about the job.
“Everything okay?” Luke’s raspy voice broke through, his gaze sharp, but concerned. I forced a smile and looked down at my phone.
“Yeah, it’s nothing. Just my dad... being more persistent lately. It’s fine.”
Luke pressed his lips together, holding back something he clearly wanted to say.
I slipped into my happy mode like muscle memory. Sometimes it felt easier to wear joy like a lightweight mask until, slowly, it stopped feeling like pretending at all. I’ve always been my own medicine. My own antidote to the gloom. Fake it till you make it or whatever.
For a while, they debated next year’s destination. I heard France, Morocco, New Zealand, even Kazakhstan. I offered Ireland.
“It rains a lot, though,” I warned them.
“Some of the best things can happen in the rain.” Luke’s eyes dropped to my mouth. I was suddenly hyperaware of his body near mine. “Will you come with us?” he asked, taking me by surprise.
“I don’t know Irish.”
“You have time to learn.”
“You could learn, too. Besides, most of the country speaks English. You don’t need me.”
A heavy sigh escaped him as he shook his head lightly and raised a wineglass to his mouth. Annoyed or conflicted—I couldn’t tell. He would forget about me soon enough anyway.
Luke stretched his arm behind the back of my chair, lightly twirling the end of my hairlock in his fingers.
He gently wrapped it to the root, and my head lightly moved into his palm to exert more pressure.
I closed my eyes, becoming the representation of my own bobblehead.
Luke turned to me with a soft gaze and gave the sweetest smile.
“Are you already drunk, sweetheart?”
“Mmm, no,” I murmured, clearly lying, still moving into his palm.
He pressed harder into my neck, circling his thumb, and I hummed.
Instantly, I was back in the memory of his strong hands digging into my thighs.
I felt the heat rush downward, pooling low in my belly as my body remembered him just as vividly as my mind did.
“Don’t blush yet, little bee. Save some for later tonight.” I opened my eyes and let my head rest against his shoulder.
The evening melted into a warm night, purple haze splashing through the whole sky. A gentle warmth spread through me as the wine-tasting shifted into live music, a band playing in the corner, people dancing, locals drifting in and out. A perfect ending to this trip.
I made my way to the bar, sweat clinging to my skin from the heat.
I ordered water and leaned against the bar, watching the dance floor.
Luke was dancing with Ava. He looked unusually happy, without the aggressive flirting I was so used to seeing.
A different side of him. A side I was falling in love with.
“Have you seen Ava?” From the left, Alex approached.
“Yeah, Luke stole her,” I said, nodding toward them. “You probably have nothing to worry about. You and Ava look way better together.”
“Thanks,” he laughed. “I’d be devastated if I lost pancake Sundays. And, you know, the love of my life.”
I chuckled.
“They’re two of my favorite people in the whole world, though.”
I smiled at his confession.
“It’s nice to see Ava actually relax. She doesn’t like to brag, but she works so hard, hasn’t taken a vacation in years.”
“She looks radiant. The proposal probably helped,” I stated the obvious.
“I hope so.”
“Besides, who wouldn’t be happier after a two-week vacation on a beach. Even Luke is.”
Alex sighed. “Luke’s just emotionally bankrupt. He says he’s happy back home, but we all know how people can hide things. He’ll get back on his feet soon. I have a feeling.”
He hesitated before continuing. “You know, when I first started dating Ava, she wanted me to meet her parents, but I was broke and terrified they wouldn’t approve.
So, I convinced Luke to pretend to be my chauffeur.
” I chuckled at an image of Luke in a Boonie hat, calling Alex Mister Harving and polishing his shoes.
“It took Ava a while to figure out that the guy driving me around and coming to game nights wasn’t actually my chauffeur. Totally worked on her parents, though.”
My laughter grew, and Alex bumped my shoulder. “He’s a good guy.”
A heaviness settled in my chest. They all kept trying to hype him up for me as if I didn’t already know how great he was. Like I wasn’t steering straight for the iceberg on purpose.
Alex moved toward them, reclaiming his fiancée. Luke let Ava go easily and scanned the crowd. I grinned just before his eyes landed on me. Sweat clung to him from dancing, a shirt button undone, showing a hint of chest hair. I was so caught up that I didn’t even notice he was already approaching.
“Oh my, my, what have I done to earn such a beautiful smile?” he said, joining me by the bar.
“Nothing. Just heard some good things about you.”
“All lies,” he teased back. His sleeves were rolled up, his hair a little wilder now. I suddenly had a sinking feeling in my chest about our fleeting time.
“Come dance with me,” I said, pulling him by the hands and walking backward with a smile. My laughter played out in the air as his hands slid to my hips, guiding me to the dance floor. Our bodies entwined with the music, finding our rhythm. His gaze dropped to my neck and chest, flushed with heat.
“You look adorable.”
He glanced down at my legs as I played with the hem of my skirt, lifting it just slightly with the music.
“You’re just drunk from all the wine.”
“No, sweetie. I’m drunk on you.” He pulled me closer, his voice low. Like he was admitting it to himself rather than just flirting with me.
His smile deepened, and he winked at me.
I felt like I was dancing in the air. We were breathless and warm, and every time my body slammed into his, Luke used the opportunity to let his touch linger on me as much as he could.
His hands roamed with purpose, tracing down my spine, drifting along the curve of my waist, like he was mapping me from memory.
My breath quickened, and my fingertips slipped into the opening of his unbuttoned shirt, brushing against his skin.
He pressed his forehead to mine for a second, digging his fingers into me, not out of urgency, but like he couldn’t bear to let me drift away.
The song faded, but we stayed close for just a moment longer, suspended in the warmth of it all.
“Hey guys, we’re heading out. Early flight tomorrow. You two coming?” Ava asked.
Luke held my gaze, still breathing hard. I averted my eyes first. I felt like I was stripped bare. But it wasn’t my body he was seeing.
It was the inevitable bruise beneath the smile he saw so clearly.
* * *
We returned to the beach house, convulsing from laughter. Logan’s dance moves were the main topic; he had described himself as having ‘two left feet that have been in a terrible car accident’.
The house had started to feel homey. Shame that it was our last night here. It probably had more to do with the people around me than the house itself.
Happy, happy, happy, I reminded myself.
I collapsed onto the soft couch with a contented sigh. Alex, Ethan, and Luke were in the kitchen, beers in hand, mid-conversation.
“Have you guys packed already?” Ava’s voice suddenly filled the place.
“Yes,” I said proudly. “My belongings are packed, the dress you gave me folded extra carefully, and my documents lined up in the order I’ll be needing them.”
I’d managed to pack before we left, despite a couple of distractions. Nice distractions.
“Overachiever much?” Alex said.
“Yeah, because running late and missing our flight due to the inability to find your passport is such a turn-on, baby,” Ava teased.
He grunted something back, and Logan laughed. “Owned.”
“I still have stuff lying around,” Luke said, stepping away. “Gonna go pack.” Luke gave me a small wink just as he disappeared from my view. Summer, Norah, and Ethan dropped onto the couch beside me.
“How are you feeling?” Norah asked gently. She was so sweet and kind, always checking in. I was going to miss her. All of them.
“Amazing.” A happy sigh escaped me, my head falling back into the cushion.
“I have a love-hate relationship with the last day of vacation,” Ethan said.
“How so?” I asked.
“It’s still vacation, but there’s a bitterness in it ending.” I understood him perfectly. Not that I went on many trips. “Then there’s the bills. Logan, can you settle our part of the expenses?”
“I’m not an accountant, Ethan,” Logan yelled from the other side of the room. “Deal with your own finances.”
“I know, but I don’t even want to look at my bank account. This trip ended up costing more than I thought.”
Something stilled in me, but I didn’t know why.
Wait!
“I’m not naming names, but the ladies might’ve had something to do with it,” Logan muttered. Norah tossed a grape at him.
“Don’t punish me for facts. I saw the credit card bill,” he laughed, and Norah stuck out her tongue at him.
“Yeah, but isn’t your company covering for some of this?” I asked, carefully crafting my words. “Luke mentioned something like that might be possible or...”
Please don’t say it. Please, please don’t say it.
“No,” he said, and I froze. “Definitely not.”
“Yeah, we wish,” Alex said, his chuckle creating a painful, clean cut into my flesh. “Even this year, when it’s sort of work-related.” My heart started beating faster. A dull, cold weight dropped in my stomach.
“But they do make sure we all get vacation at the same time, so that’s something.”
He lied to me.
I tried to piece together an excuse. Maybe he misunderstood. Maybe something changed. Maybe I’d heard him wrong. Reasons that made sense. But deep down, I knew better.
This felt different. Intentional.
And not just a lie you tell to soften something, not a slip or a moment of hesitation. It was a choice to make things easier.
A strange anger bubbled inside me.
What else had he bent into shape to make things easier?
I forced a tight smile, one that barely reached my lips, and excused myself. My feet moved mechanically toward my room, every step felt like a betrayal of my own instinct.
You should’ve known better.
I didn’t do lies wrapped in good intentions. Not from him. Not if that’s how it all started.
Luke really thought he could treat me like some na?ve little girl, as if I should be flattered simply because he’d decided I was worth his attention. That he chose me for the trip.
Was that what people thought of me?
Don’t get angry. Swallow a lie. Keep playing along.
Choose to be kind.
If he believed for a second that I wasn’t capable of anger, of frustration, of standing up for myself, he was gravely mistaken. And I was more than ready to prove it.