TEN - JAMESON
Roman felt like he was genuinely trying to make peace with me.
It was nice, but that didn’t negate the fact he was hiding something important from me—like where he’d been or why he’d left.
Because of that alone, I didn’t know if I could even trust him.
Did I want to? Yes…and no. Unfortunately, I sort of didn’t have much of a choice at the moment since my life currently depended on him.
A part of me wanted to make amends with him, go back to where we were before all of…
this, whatever this was. Shit, he was once my best friend, my safe place.
He’d been the glue that held me together when it felt like everything around me was falling apart.
Roman had always known the right words to say to make any bad situation seem less relevant to the even bigger issues going on around us.
And damn, he gave the best hugs. The kind that when his arms were around you, you just knew that without a doubt everything was going to be okay no matter what.
When Roman’s hand had touched mine during lunch, I’d lost all senses.
Even the slightest skin-to-skin contact with him made me weak.
Truth be told, it pained me to be such a bitch to him, but it was all I knew to do because his touch was kryptonite to my defenses.
The problem with him was he was just as easy to hate as he was to love, Because now he was on my ass about Chris, and I did not have the energy for their pissing contest. As it was, there was entirely too much on my plate to sit and entertain Roman’s jealousy or Chris’s pushy advances.
“The place looks nice,” Roman observed as he looked around the casino.
I’d been so lost in thought I didn’t realize I’d aimlessly wandered through the casino floor. “Thank you. It was a real labor of love.”
“I like it. It’s…different. Classy.”
I smiled, inside and out. I was proud of how things had turned out. Revamping the place hadn’t been high on my priority list, but once I’d confirmed we’d be hosting the gala this year, I knew the place needed an overhaul ASAP.
Initially, all I wanted to do was lock myself in my room, shove myself under the covers, and hide away from even the slightest inconvenience.
“We actually just finished renovations a few weeks ago. I wanted it all to be done in time for the fundraiser, for obvious reasons.”
This year’s theme was Alice in Wonderland black-tie masquerade.
The gala had always taken place the weekend before Halloween, and I wanted to incorporate a sprinkling of my dad’s favorite movie into the theme.
So Kelly and I tossed around a few ideas, and the concept was born.
She and her personal assistant, Haley, ran with it.
The fundraiser itself had grown exponentially over the years.
My mom had convinced him to start the whole thing in an effort to raise awareness of child and human trafficking in the area.
According to him, he was never on board with the whole thing and thought it was a terrible idea, given my own history and how I came to exist.
See, I was once a victim myself. The first time my dad had ever caught Kane trafficking people, I’d been one of them.
I was just a baby, and nobody involved that night knew who I belonged to.
My dad handled things on his own, and called in a few favors.
The victims were released, and I stayed with Elliott and Lena, aka Dad and Mom.
Unfortunately, Mom was only able to be a part of the annual event a few times because around the time I was three, she’d contracted pneumonia that took her life. My dad continued hosting the fundraiser in memory of my mom, and now, I was going to keep it going for him.
We were already expecting the largest turnout ever for the simple fact that it had been almost two years since our last fundraiser, given that last year’s had been canceled due to my dad’s death right before the event was set to take place.
The recent changes I’d made to Emerald Haze were one-eighty of its original Mardi Gras theme. The original design wasn’t bad, but it was long overdue and time to go.
I hired one of the best designers from Las Vegas, who came highly recommended from the area.
They brought in a team of people who worked around the clock to bring my vision to life.
When all was said and done, the décor had gone from purple, green, and gold, confetti and jesters with gemstones, to full-blown moody, gothic glam with black crystals that dripped from oversized chandeliers with shimmery diamonds and every other light fixture, mirrors for days, and gold and silver mixed-metal accents on every surface.
It was still over-the-top, as one would expect from a casino, except now it had been brought into this decade.
“I think Elliott would approve,” Roman said reassuringly as he walked alongside me with his hands stuffed in his front pockets.
“I appreciate that. He was my inspiration, you know. Halloween was his favorite. It was a challenge, though, because I didn’t want to ward people off by having a strict Halloween theme, so I had the designer tweak it to what you see now. The team did it all in less than six months.”
“I’d say whoever came up with the final design nailed it.”
“So far, no one’s complained about it, at least not to my face. So I consider that a win.”
“I don’t see any green though,” he observed.
“Oh, it’s there. You know I wouldn’t leave out my dad’s favorite color.”
I pulled out my phone, and with the tap of a few buttons, the background and uplighting faded from a soft, warm glow to a bright emerald green.
“Fully automated.”
“Very clever.”
We’d finally reached the back-of-house service elevator.
I tapped my keypad with my e-reader. I’d never been more thankful that the ride up eleven floors would be quick because being confined in a four-by-six, walk-in-closet-sized room with Roman Stone, who not only looked every bit of mafia boss in his head-to-toe black suit but now wore cologne that smelled like sex and candy, made the already tight space feel even more suffocating.
We rode in silence, standing side by side, and when the doors finally opened, I exited first, leaving him behind.
I let myself into my office, kicking the door open so it at least wouldn’t slam back shut on him.
Then I circled around to the back side of my desk, desperate to put as much space and furniture between us as possible. Not that it stopped us before.
“Lunch was nice. Thanks for not stabbing me with your fork,” he quipped as he took the seat across from mine.
“Too many witnesses.” I winked. “I was waiting to get you alone up here.” Which, thinking about it now, probably hadn’t been my brightest idea.
We both knew I wasn’t immune to his advances. But I had nowhere else to go where I knew we could talk more openly without the risk of being heard or a place that didn’t have a bed.
“Ha. Ha.” He glanced around my office. I hadn’t changed much since I’d moved in. I’d added a few basic décor pieces, removed some outdated artwork, stuck a live plant in the corner near the window. “You seem to have fallen nicely into this role.”
“Pssh. I’m glad you think so. I think I’ve spent more days than not debating on blowing my own brains out.”
“Sounds like a cop-out. You’re better than that.”
“Well, I must think so, too, since I’m still here.”
“I can only imagine what you’ve been through, James, and I’m not even going to pretend like I know. But if you ever need anyone, I’m here for you.”
But you weren’t, was what I wanted to say. “I appreciate it. It was a hell of a transition, that’s for sure.”
I stared over at Roman. He looked calm, comfortable, in control…like he belonged in my chair and not me. Maybe he did. He was absolutely better equipped to do this job than me. But I had shit to prove—to myself and my staff.
“I already accepted your apology. What do you want?”
“Hmm? Nothing. Just telling you I’m sorry again. That’s all.”
“You’re full of shit, Roman. You want something.”
“Maybe.” He smiled. “Okay, you’re right.”
“Then spill it.”
He casually leaned back to one side. “Don’t jump all over my ass, okay? I’m just curious—”
“If you’re going to say anything about Chris, you can forget—”
“Not about him, or anyone else for that matter. I was going to ask if you knew how many properties there were?”
I scrunched my eyebrows together. “Properties? Why do you ask?”
“Just wondering. That’s all.”
I folded my arms across my chest. “No, you’re not just curious. Roman. What are you up to? We already had this conversation once.”
“James, hear me out before you shut me down. Okay? I saw the way you looked around at the cameras downstairs. I’ve picked up on every single one of your subtle movements—every twitch, every flinch, stare, gaze, name it.
It’s what I do. You’ve said more to me without ever speaking a word out loud.
I know that you know something is going on, but you refuse to address it, but it’s because you don’t know how. Am I wrong?”
Fuck. He was not wrong. Not even a little bit. I hated with a passion that one of Roman’s many talents was reading body language. It was something that had always come naturally to him. My dad knew it; that was just one reason he protected him.
“No. You’re not wrong,” I reluctantly confessed under my breath. “Sometimes I think the only reason I’ve lived this long is because I’ve kept my head buried in the sand.”
“If you fully accept my apology, then you know a little forgiveness goes a long way, James. Help me help you.”
I huffed. Fuck it. What was the worst that could happen?
I tell him everything I know, which probably wasn’t even that much, and he does what with that info?
Fix all my problems? Make them worse? Guess I’d soon find out.
“Aside from Emerald Haze’s main resort and outlying buildings here on the property, we have one warehouse on Mud Island and one near the airport in Memphis.
I’d have to look. How many do you know about? ”
“The ones you just mentioned. I don’t think there are any others. Have you never been to any of these?”
I already knew he wasn’t going to like my answer. “No.”
He raised an eyebrow. “No? As in never?”
“Nope. Not a one. I took over my dad’s decades-old family business and put all of my faith into the men who were already in place running things. I never once thought to question their loyalty or motives, and I’d never had a reason to visit them.”
“I’m not saying all of these people don’t have your best interest at heart, but James, it might be about time you start asking some really tough questions or, at the very least, doing your own research.”
I let out a huff. “This shit is so exhausting.”
“Let me help you…let me in, James. You’ve got to if you want my help.”
I wanted to—I wanted so badly to break down just a fraction of the wall I’d spent the last year putting up to protect myself from him—from anyone. I wanted to believe he had my best interest at heart, but at the moment, it was hard to trust anyone. Even him.
He held my gaze for entirely too long for long for my own comfort. I only wished I could have read him anymore the way he still could do to me.
To break whatever trance he had me in, I stood up and walked over to the massive magnolia oil painting hanging on the far side of my office.
I released the latch behind the ornate gold frame and swung the heavy picture back to reveal a built-in safe in the wall.
A few spins of the lock and the mechanism released with a click.
“All these years, I had no idea that was there.”
“That’s the idea.” Only a few people knew this safe was here.
I reached inside and pulled out a thick manila envelope stuffed with papers and walked it over to Roman. I propped myself against my desk and held it out to him. When he went to grab it, I quickly withdrew it. “Uh, uh, uh. Not so fast. I need something from you first.”
He folded his hands together, covering his mouth with steepled fingers. His eyes slowly raked over my body from head to toe and back up. “I’m listening.”
I narrowed my eyes. “Not that.”
“That’s too bad.”
As much as I wanted to entertain whatever idea it was he had, because, chances were, I was thinking it, too, my common sense overrode my hormones for the time being.
“There is a lot of information inside this envelope. A lot. Like everything my dad thought I might need to run the family business one day…god willing, and just in case. There’s info in here that you won’t find on any encrypted computer.
I have to trust you, Roman. Like really trust you won’t use any of what you find in here against me or go rogue. ”
“You have my word, James. You’ve always had my word.”
“I mean it.” I didn’t know why I was so nervous all of a sudden. I just knew Roman had information that I didn’t, and if he wanted to get anything out of me, I needed some answers from him first. “Tell me where you’ve been.”
He closed his eyes.
Finally.
He was going to tell me something, and I didn’t even know if it would have made a difference now. I just wanted to know; I needed to know.
“James,” he practically groaned. “You know I can’t tell you that. Not yet.”
“Then when?” I yelled at him. “When do I get to know what the fuck went on around here?”
“Soon,” he replied in an even tone. “I promise. I just—I need a little more time, okay?”
“Time? Time for what? You know what, fuck it, and fuck you. It’s always something with you.” I stalked across the room, and shoved the envelope back into the safe, slamming the door closed. Then I put the picture back into place.
I spun on my heels and started to leave my office. I didn’t give a shit about him or his promises.
“Jameson, stop.”
“Fuck off,” I spit out as I tried passing him to get to the door.
“Stop running from me,” he ordered with stern I’m not fucking around with you anymore force to his voice.
“Don’t tell me what to do,” I hissed. “You are not my dad.”
“No, I’m not,” he said with a tone that had softened, “but you didn’t listen to him either. So please, at least listen to me.”