Chapter 38
Chapter Thirty-eight
Mazzy
“Can we go see the doggy?” Katty asked, her hand in mine.
“Maybe. We’ll ask Daddy. Bea and Sal might not be home.” I hitched my tote bag higher on my shoulder.
“I hope they are. The doggy’s so nice.”
We were walking down the sidewalk on our way to Ben’s for another sleepover. I loved his house, but the parallel parking situation was for the birds. Of course, he’d offered to pick us up, but I needed my car to get to work and a modicum of independence.
Now that Ben’s season was over, he would have happily driven Katty and me everywhere without a word of complaint. One more day of parallel parking, I might have taken him up on it, independence be damned.
Just as we were nearing his house, a car door slammed shut, and a woman called, “Hello! Wait a moment.”
Katty tugged on my hand. “Mommy, I think that lady is talking to us.”
I turned, my stomach dropping at Louise Wells making her way toward us, a clawed hand clutching the middle of her coat. She looked marginally better than she had the week before. More color in her cheeks and steadier on her feet.
“Hello,” she repeated. “I recognize you. You were at my son’s house the other night.”
I held Katty’s hand tighter, nudging her behind me. “I don’t want to be rude, but I’m sure Roman told you not to come back.”
She stopped in front of us. “He did, but I was hoping…” Her eyes drifted toward his house. “Well, I can’t give up. Roman can be stubborn, but maybe if I tried…”
“Uncle Roman?” Katty popped out from behind my leg. “Do you know Uncle Roman?”
Louise’s gaze fell on Katty, and her breath hitched. She cataloged my daughter’s features—the curls, her big brown eyes, the way she bounced on her toes when she was excited, just like her dad. There was no missing it. Louise certainly didn’t. “Oh my…this is—she’s Ben’s?”
Normally, I loved how friendly Katty was, but now was not the time, kid.
She didn’t get the memo.
“My daddy’s name is Ben,” Katty replied.
“He has a daughter,” she whispered, her eyes flicking to mine. “You’re his wife?”
Before I could answer, Ben’s door flew open, and he sprang off the porch like a leopard. He didn’t stop until he was upon us, lifting Katty with one arm, wrapping the other around my shoulders.
He took one look at his mother—one single, venomous glare so foreign on his face, I almost didn’t recognize him—raised his hand, and jabbed a finger at her.
“No,” he uttered with finality, then guided Katty and me into his house, closing and locking the door behind him.
He wouldn’t talk about it. Katty had questions, but he just told her the woman was a stranger, and if she ever saw her again, she should tell a grown-up. With me, when we were alone, he asked me to drop it. I’d assumed he meant for now, so I gave it to him.
It had freaked him out to see her speaking to Katty, and I understood that. But his total shutdown was a shock. In all other things, he’d always been wide open.
As the days passed, nothing changed. Ben was antsy, constantly texting his brothers and staying locked up tight on the topic.
He wasn’t distant. Not really. At least not physically.
He spent every night at my apartment, and when we were in the same room, he was touching me, his pinky hooked to mine, a strand of my hair twirled around his finger.
He laughed, told jokes, bounced around like his usual self.
But he wasn’t himself. Not the man I’d come to know.
Maybe this was how he dealt with stress. I told myself he had to work it out himself before he could talk about it.
Fortunately, I had Shira to commiserate with. Roman had been more open with her. He’d shared their mother had gone by their offices when he hadn’t been there, but Nate had. Since then, Nate had been uncharacteristically distracted, and it was weighing on Roman.
It must have been weighing on Ben too, but he wasn’t willing to share that with me. I didn’t know what to do or how to help him. How did I get him back?
He couldn’t keep laughing this off. It wasn’t working for either of us. So when Aunt Barb volunteered to babysit Katty overnight again, I jumped at the chance. If Ben and I had some solid time together, just the two of us, I might be able to ease him into talking about it.
I hoped.
Ben was pacing in front of my office building when I got off work, and my alarm bells started ringing. But when he faced me, his wide smile lit his face like Christmas. I hadn’t seen that kind of smile on him—a real one, without strain or stress—in over a week.
“Baby,” he called. “Get over here.”
Laughing, I rushed toward him and let him sweep me up in his arms. He buried his face in my hair, kissing the side of my head.
“Missed you,” he murmured. “You smell so good.”
“Missed you too.” We’d seen each other this morning, but I’d been missing my Ben in a way I couldn’t put into words. “Are you okay?”
“Great. So, so great.” He pressed a kiss to my lips, holding my face in his hands. “You’re so beautiful. I love looking at you.”
I poked his chest. “What’s gotten you into this good mood?”
He slung his arm around me, guiding me toward his car. “I get to spend all night with my girl. What kind of mood do you expect me to be in?”
Bad. Distraught. Too quiet. Distracted.
Something had changed between this morning and now, but who was I to look a gift horse in the mouth? If he was doing better, I would take it with open arms.
“I’m just glad you’re happy.” I kissed his hand hanging over my shoulder. “Where are we going tonight?”
“Well, since we’re footloose and fancy-free, I thought I’d take my baby out for dinner and maybe some dancing. What do you say?”
“I say yes.” Then I looked down at my clothes. “Though…I’m not exactly dressed for any of that.”
“Good thing we have time. We’re gonna head home, make out a little, then you can get fancied up.”
“Only make out a little?”
He raised a brow. “Why do you sound doubtful?”
“Because I know you and your making-out schemes.”
We reached his car, and he opened the passenger door for me. “You’ve got me all figured out.”
“Not quite.” I pushed up on my toes to give him a quick kiss. “But I’m getting there.”
He gave my ass a smack as I passed him to climb in the car, then he leaned to buckle me in and kissed me again.
“Love you.”
I brushed my fingertips over his scruff. “I love you too, Benny.”
By the time the car was moving and we were headed to his place, his hand on my knee, my head on the rest, my stomach was no longer twisted with worry, and I felt like I could breathe again.
Ben was okay.
We were okay.