Chapter 18 #2
Yet Ray has been more than eager to write songs with Gene again.
He’s been trying to think up something new in his downtime, hearing tunes in his head when he’s alone in the shower or before he drifts off to sleep at night.
Finally, he can share what he’s been creating with Gene, who’s sitting on the couch next to him.
The windows of the bus are cracked open to let in some fresh air, warmer than average on the last day of September.
The breeze blows the curtains around, but also Gene’s hair, the long black strands whipping around his handsome face.
Ray watches closely as Gene lifts a hand to curl a lock behind his ear, showcasing one of his sideburns.
Even such a simple movement gets Ray’s heart beating faster.
Gene sets his hand back down, resting it on the acoustic guitar in his lap. He smiles at Ray—oh, how that smile makes Ray’s cheeks burn. “So, you had a song idea?” Gene asks.
“Yeah. I was thinking of a folksy ballad, like I told you before. Like something that would sound good just acoustic. I got some lyrics that could maybe be the chorus, or the pre-chorus or something. But either way, I wanted to tell you.”
“Yeah, for sure. Lay it on me.”
“Alright.” Ray sings the first part aloud a capella, “Livin’ life and travelin’ all around, and it’s you who finds me where I am.”
Ray nods to the beat, and so does Gene, as he continues—
“Ain’t it funny how a girl like you, and a guy like me, could be so good.”
“Wait, I love that. But maybe we could make it better. If you don’t mind me changing some of the words a little,” Gene says.
He strums a chord on his guitar that matches the key Ray was singing in—instantly knowing the notes, with his damn perfect pitch—and sings a variation on the last line Ray just sang, “Ain’t it funny how someone like you, and someone like me, could be so good. ”
Ray nods. “Man, you’re right, Gene. That is way better. Changing it from ‘a girl’ to ‘someone’.”
“You think so?” Gene stops strumming.
“Yeah. It makes it more vague, not talking about a specific gender. So you don’t know if they’re singing about a girl, or even another guy…”
“A guy singing about another guy?” Gene chuckles.
“Well, maybe, but that’s why I like how you changed the lyric. It’s not clear who. Anyone could sing it, then. Isn’t that what you’re going for, changing it that way?”
“Okay, you got me. I just… felt a little embarrassed admitting that. But you said it all for me.”
“I know you, Gene.” Ray smiles. “But yeah, that’s good. Wait, what if we sang this like a duet?”
“What do you mean? Don’t we already sing together?” Gene chuckles.
“No, I mean I sing one verse, you sing the second verse, and we sing the chorus together. And maybe we trade off on the bridge. That sort of duet, not just harmonizing.”
“Oh, yeah, I like the sound of that.” Gene nods. “And if the lyrics are vague, that works out great. Two guys just singing about their relationships… Not more specific than that.”
“Yeah, that’s what I’m thinkin’. I got some more lyrics, too, if you wanna hear them.”
“Sure, go for it.”
“Alright.” Ray takes a deep breath, and sings a cappella again, “But that’s just how it is… I know it to be true… I love you.”
He looks in Gene’s eyes as he sings the last lyric.
It’s honestly adorable how Gene’s cheeks flush red after that. What may have been some random love song in Ray’s head now feels peculiar when sung aloud, directly to his best friend—the man he can’t stop thinking about.
It’s like he’s saying it to Gene.
He has told Gene he loves him, but only once, when he was wasted in Las Vegas. Ray still remembers. Of course what he said is true. He loves Gene. He is his best friend, after all. But the kind of love one feels for a friend and the kind one feels for a lover are different.
The lines have been blurred, and he’s not sure what he’s feeling anymore.
Though his heart gets jumpstarted, kicked into gear as Gene strums his guitar, repeating the same lyrics back that Ray just said.
“But that’s just how it is… I know it to be true… I love you,” Gene sings, making eye contact with Ray.
He keeps strumming, filling the bus with his sweet music.
But no more words are said. Instead, Ray keeps staring at Gene, into those beautiful hazel eyes.
There’s so much emotion swirling in them, trying to tell Ray something he can’t decipher.
Whatever it is, he’s drawn to it—leaning in closer as if he has no other choice.
Something within his chest compels him to lift his hand, placing it on Gene’s cheek. It makes him stop strumming the guitar, but the music still lingers in Ray’s mind. Gene leans into Ray’s touch. His face is so warm, so close—if only they could close this distance, and lean in even further—
“Hey Ray, you got any more of those Marathon Bars in your bag? I would just dig in but I figured I’d ask first—oh.”
Santiago’s voice jolts Ray’s lungs. Ray nearly chokes on his own spit as he pulls his hand off of Gene so quickly, causing him to cough. Putting his arm in front of his face, he coughs more into his elbow. He can hear Gene shudder a sigh, breath shaky.
“Oh, am I… interrupting something?” Santi puts a hand on his hip, staring down at them from the bus aisle.
“We were writing a song, and you came over to ask me about candy?” Ray frowns.
“Hey, so what? They’re really good.” Santi shrugs. “But, man. I have to ask, what were you doing just now? It almost looked like you guys were going to…” He trails off without finishing his sentence.
“We were, um, we were just…” Ray doesn’t have a good excuse. Everything he could possibly say would be an obvious lie. But what other choice does he have? “Just feeling the mood. We’re writing a love song.” At least worded like that, it’s still mostly true.
“A love song. With you two sitting all close like that. Riiiight.” Santi squints at them, bringing a hand up to rub his chin. “I think there’s something else going on.”
“What do you mean, ‘something else’?” Gene asks, trying to play it cool, Ray can tell.
“Well, I don’t know! I mean, I know you guys are best friends, but that seemed a little closer than I’d expect…”
Ray’s heart thuds madly, banging over and over against his chest.
This is it.
The moment someone finds out.
“Y-yeah, but there’s nothing wrong with just feeling affection for a friend, is there?” Ray says. “That’s all it is. Us being close.”
Santi shakes his head. “Oh, whatever. I don’t want to keep pestering you guys if you don’t want to talk about it. You don’t have to say any more.” He waves his hand in front of himself. “But anyway, about what I originally came over here for. You got the chocolate still in your bag, Ray?”
Ray couldn’t be more happy to talk about candy than right at that very moment. “Yeah, you can have some. Just grab a bar.”
“Alright, thanks, man. I’ll let you two… continue writing that love song, yeah?” Santi grins, giving them a wink.
“Yeah. We will.” Ray swallows.
And just like that, Santi gives them a wave, walking back toward the front of the bus where he was sitting with Maurice and the rest of the Brooms.
Ray lets out a slow, deep sigh. But as he does so, Gene reaches over, setting his palm on Ray’s thigh.
“Gene,” he whispers. “What are you doing? We just…”
“He’s gone, it’s fine,” Gene whispers back, smiling. “That went better than I expected.”
“Huh. Yeah, I guess so, right?”
Ray thinks back to the conversations he had with Santiago not too long ago, discussing Ray’s relationships, trouble with Carol, and how close he is with Gene.
Santi never outright suggested anything romantic between Ray and Gene, seemingly oblivious to anything going on.
But after stumbling upon what just happened here on the bus—them being so close to kissing—Santi might start putting the puzzle pieces together. Which…
What if Santi knowing the truth isn’t really a bad thing?
Santi is their closest friend out of everyone in the band.
He’s honestly the most caring, sweet, understanding person Ray knows.
But even if that is the case, Ray isn’t ready to talk about it.
No, the timing doesn’t seem right, not unless he discusses it with Gene first, and especially not when Carol might wake up from her nap at any moment.
But before she does, he sets his hand on top of Gene’s on his thigh, savoring the warmth.
“Well, I guess we should continue on with that song,” Ray says, giving Gene a sweet smile. “What do you think?”
“For sure. I think we really got something good here.”