Chapter 7 - It Sold #3
Dyan ka na matulog. Wag ka na umuwi.
Then:
Sabihin mo thank you kay Tita.
Jane was still standing near me.
I showed her.
She read it.
Her shoulders dropped slightly.
Like she'd been waiting for permission too.
"See?"
"Everyone is controlling."
"Good."
I laughed.
"You're not even pretending."
"No."
Chloe left before eight.
She had someone picking her up.
Before leaving, she looked at me.
"You okay?"
I stared.
"Why is everyone asking?"
"Because mukha kang antok."
"I am sleepy."
Jane from beside me—
"Exactly."
Chloe nodded.
Then looked at Jane.
"Text mo ko pag nagsuka."
"I will."
"I am not going to vomit."
Neither of them listened.
Traitors.
Chloe did mano downstairs.
Then disappeared.
By nine, the alcohol had mostly become sleepiness.
Jane had asked me if I was okay four more times.
At first, funny.
By the fourth—
"Jane."
"What?"
"I am alive."
She paused.
Something crossed her face so quickly I almost missed it.
Then she frowned.
"Don't joke like that."
I went still.
Right.
To her, it was just a bad joke.
To me—
not remotely.
"Sorry."
Her expression softened immediately.
"Okay ka talaga?"
There it was again.
But quieter.
"Yes."
"Sure?"
"Yes."
She studied me for another second.
Then nodded.
"Okay."
That one felt different.
Not because she meant anything romantic by it.
She was worried.
That simple.
My friend was worried about me.
And apparently I had been gone from people's lives long enough that I'd forgotten what it felt like when someone was allowed to be.
We went into her room.
I sat on the bed.
Then slowly lay down.
Jane stared.
"Wow."
"What?"
"Diretso kama."
"Sleepy."
"Magpalit ka muna."
"I don't have clothes."
She opened a drawer.
Pulled out a shirt.
"Here."
I stared.
"That's yours."
"Obviously."
"Will it fit?"
"Try."
Then, before handing it over—
"Can you walk straight?"
I stared.
"Yes."
"Show me."
"Jane."
"Stand."
I laughed.
"You're ridiculous."
"Stand."
I stood.
Walked three steps toward the door.
Turned.
"Happy?"
She watched carefully.
"Okay."
"Jesus Christ."
"Bathroom. Change."
"Yes, nurse."
She rolled her eyes.
"Go."
I changed in the bathroom.
Washed my face too.
Drank water because I knew she would ask.
When I came back, Jane looked at me.
Then laughed.
"What?"
"Wala."
I narrowed my eyes.
"Why are you looking?"
"May mata ako."
I stared.
She smiled.
"That sounds familiar."
"Fuck you."
"Tipsy ka pa?"
"No."
She stepped closer.
Not enough to crowd me.
Just enough to inspect.
"Sure?"
"Yes."
"Nahihilo?"
"No."
"Nasusuka?"
"No."
"Headache?"
"No."
She nodded.
Finally satisfied.
"Okay. Lie down."
I did.
Jane turned off the main light.
Only the small lamp near the study table remained.
She placed a bottle of water on the table beside the bed.
I watched.
"You prepared supplies?"
"In case uhawin ka."
"I can get water."
"Not if nahihilo ka."
"I told you I'm not."
"Then congratulations. Water pa rin."
I laughed quietly.
She climbed onto the other side of the single bed.
Not much space.
Never had been.
We had done this before.
High school.
Late nights.
Sleepovers.
Nothing special.
Friends.
I turned onto my side.
Face near the pillow.
Breathed in.
Clean.
Fabric conditioner.
Shampoo maybe.
Something specifically Jane that I couldn't identify.
Familiar.
Comforting.
I closed my eyes.
Then—
"Bango ba?"
My eyes opened.
Jane was looking at me.
I stared.
She smiled.
Fuck.
"Sakto lang."
She started laughing.
Quietly because everyone outside was settling down.
"Sinungaling."
"Matulog ka."
"Naamoy mo talaga?"
"No."
"You literally inhaled."
"I was breathing."
"Grabe breathing."
I turned away.
"Goodnight."
Jane laughed again.
"Goodnight, Lia."
For a while, I stayed awake.
Not because of Jane.
Well—
the pillow smelled nice.
But that wasn't the point.
I was thinking about the day.
My siblings.
Their businesses.
Ate Bianca's packaging.
Kuya Nathan's sauce.
Sofia asking for cost before price.
Lunch at Jane's.
Chloe stealing the chair.
Jane's brothers offering me alcohol.
Jane quietly taking the glass away before I drank more.
Water appearing in my hand every few minutes.
Food because apparently lunch from six hours ago didn't count.
Her asking—
Okay ka?
Again.
And again.
Not irritated.
Not dramatic.
Just checking.
Making sure.
I had spent so much of Original Life being the person everyone assumed could handle herself.
Eventually, people stopped asking.
Or maybe they hadn't.
Maybe I'd just gotten very good at giving the answer before anyone could worry.
I'm fine.
Busy lang.
Kaya ko.
Tonight Jane hadn't accepted the first answer.
I wasn't sure why that stayed with me.
Beside me, Jane moved.
I opened my eyes.
She was already looking at me.
Not amused this time.
Just checking again.
"What?"
She hesitated.
"Wala."
I waited.
She kept looking.
Then—
"Okay ka?"
I smiled despite myself.
"Yes."
"Promise?"
That word caught me off guard.
I looked at her.
Twenty-three-year-old Jane.
My friend since Grade Seven.
Someone who had no idea there was an entire dead life sitting behind my eyes.
Someone who only knew that I didn't drink much, had gotten red and sleepy, and had a terrible habit of insisting I was fine.
"Promise."
Her face relaxed.
"Okay."
She turned onto her side.
A few seconds passed.
Then—
"Lia."
"Hm?"
"Wag ka sumuka sa kama ko."
I laughed into the pillow.
There.
Normal restored.
"Fuck you."
Jane laughed.
But before she closed her eyes, she reached over and pushed the water bottle slightly closer to my side of the bed.
Nothing romantic.
Nothing dramatic.
Just—
there if I needed it.
And somewhere between her laughing and me telling her to shut up—
I fell asleep.