Chapter 93 - New Names #2
My soul left my body slightly.
Bigger printer.
Of course.
The old life rushed forward.
Production printer.
Then another.
Then another.
Volume.
Facilities.
Awards.
Heartbreak capital.
I looked at the current machine.
Current workload.
Current numbers.
Not memory.
Numbers.
"Eventually."
"When?"
"When this one earns the right to complain."
Rina blinked.
"What?"
"When utilization justifies it."
"Oh."
She nodded.
Then smiled.
"Akala ko bibili na kayo next week."
I stared.
"Why?"
"You look like you like machines."
Apparently this trait survived without historical context.
Rude.
Jane called one evening while I was reviewing orders.
Not emergency.
Just bored.
I answered.
"Hello?"
"Busy?"
"Yes."
"Okay bye."
"Wait."
She laughed.
"What?"
"You called."
"You said busy."
"I can be busy and answer for five minutes."
"Wow. Generous."
"What do you want?"
"Nothing."
There it was.
Normal friendship call.
We talked twenty-eight minutes.
Excellent five minutes.
She told me about work.
I told her one customer had requested an impossible delivery date.
She said—
"You'll accept it."
"No."
"You always accept impossible things."
That line hit somewhere strange.
Because old Lia had.
Several versions of me had.
Current me had learned better.
"No."
Jane went quiet.
"Really?"
"Yes."
"Character development."
"You have no idea."
She laughed.
True.
She really didn't.
After we ended the call, I sat there for a while.
Then opened an old note.
Current Jane is not the bride.
I read it.
Deleted it.
Not because it was wrong.
Because I didn't need to reduce her to what she wasn't.
Current Jane was Jane.
That was enough.
Then I deleted—
Current Chloe is not my breakup emergency contact yet.
Same reason.
Chloe was Chloe.
Not a role.
Not a function.
Not a future utility.
People deserved more than my memory assigning them jobs.
I kept only one line.
Build systems. Meet people. Let them become themselves.
That one stayed.
Months passed.
Five employees became seven.
I hired Nica for finishing and packing.
Then Sarah for admin support.
New names.
New dynamics.
Rina became someone I trusted.
Not because she reminded me of Anna.
She didn't.
Lea annoyed me differently from Mae.
Camille's inventory style was not Jenny's.
Mika had her own strengths.
Good.
That became comforting.
The company was becoming mine again—
but not the old one.
Something new.
Jane and Chloe kept asking to meet.
I kept saying yes more often than no.
Sometimes dinner.
Sometimes coffee.
Once a mall.
No intervention.
Thank God.
Every now and then, my brain broke.
Jane wore a color similar to her wedding reception outfit.
Brain:
Bride.
Stop.
Chloe asked if I was dating.
Brain:
Audrey.
Stop.
Jane said—
"Good makeup today?"
Brain:
Fuck. I wore good makeup today.
Stop.
I laughed at completely inappropriate times more than once.
They thought I was becoming strange.
Fair.
I was carrying eleven deleted years around while pretending brunch was just brunch.
Brain damage seemed medically reasonable.
But the memories started changing shape.
Less like instructions.
More like photographs.
Jane at her wedding.
Mae at my office door.
Jenny with utilization reports.
Audrey holding a charger.
Miguel asking for real loan terms.
Celeste criticizing shoes.
They existed in me.
They did not have to happen again to remain real.
That was probably the part I had been struggling with.
I kept thinking letting the current life diverge somehow erased the old one a second time.
It didn't.
I remembered.
That was enough.
Maybe.
Eventually.
One evening, after dinner with Jane and Chloe, we stood outside waiting for rides.
Chloe left first.
Jane stayed beside me.
No romance.
No tension.
Just quiet.
Then she said—
"I'm glad we're hanging out more."
I looked at her.
Not bride.
Not ex-almost.
Not person who chose Miguel.
Just Jane.
"Me too."
She smiled.
"Good."
Then—
"You were weird for a while."
"I'm still weird."
"True."
"Fuck you."
She laughed.
There.
Easy.
Her ride arrived.
She waved.
Left.
I watched for two seconds.
Then went home.
No future projection.
No searching Miguel.
No wondering whether she would someday kiss me.
No trying to protect myself from a breakup that hadn't happened.
Current Jane got to become herself.
And apparently—
so did I.
The next morning, I entered the workspace.
Rina was already there.
Lea was answering a message.
Camille was counting materials.
Jessa was setting up production.
Mika was following up on approvals.
Nica and Sarah came shortly after.
Nobody was a replacement.
Nobody needed to be.
I looked around.
Different names.
Different company.
Different life.
Good.
Then the printer made a sound.
I turned slowly.
Some things, apparently, did not deserve reinvention.
"Don't start."
Rina looked at me.
"Ma'am?"
"Not you."
I walked toward the printer.
Current information:
still a bitch.