FUNNY GUYS #2
Oh my God. There’s no fucking way he’s doing this right now. The fake niceness in his voice is an immediate threat. The kind of threat you feel when you’re worried someone is about to embarrass you right in front of all of your friends.
He and Luca both do it. I fucking hate it.
Seth is completely starstruck. Of course.
“Of course,” he says slowly, carefully shaking Parker’s hand. “I’m a huge fan.”
“Yeah,” he nods, folding his arms across his chest and scratching his short beard that definitely needs trimming. “So how do you know Anders?”
Parker has his gaze locked on Seth and it makes my stomach churn. He’s fucking with me and Seth has no idea. It’s so fucking childish.
“School, I guess,” Seth mutters, turning to me for confirmation. “I go to GW. We met at a party—”
Parker, completely obvious even though he’s trying to appear casual, slings his arm around my shoulder and pulls me into him.
“A party,” Parker repeats like it’s the most interesting thing in the world. “Anders loves parties.”
“You’re being annoying,” I tell him, tilting my head up to look at him. “Don’t you have…charity to do? Kids to talk to?”
“Between the three of us.” He exhales once, still wearing his menacing grin. “I hate kids,” Parker whispers to Seth and I. “But…you know,” he shrugs. “It’s for a good cause. Always good to show up for the community.”
“Petchka,” I warn. “Please go. You’re bothering me.”
He holds his hands up in surrender, taking a step back. “You’re right.”
I hate how my body stings from the loss of contact.
“So good to finally meet you,” he tells Seth. “Anders has told me and his family a lot about you.”
What a fucking liar.
Seth immediately looks weirded out. “Really?”
“Oh yeah,” Parker nods. “Always talking about…” he pauses for a minute. Probably trying to remember what Seth’s name is, even though I never told him. “He calls you the party guy, you know. It’s really cute.”
I can’t believe this.
“Oh my God,” I groan, pinching the bridge of my nose. I can feel a migraine forming already. “Seth, please ignore him. He really likes to embarrass me like this.”
“It’s okay,” Seth chuckles weakly. “You know—I just remembered Connor needed me to give him a ride to Abigail’s after this, so…” He gives me an awkward head nod. “I’ll call you, okay?”
“Great,” I say flatly under my breath . “Okay. Yeah. Thanks for coming out.”
The moment Seth turns around to leave, I give Parker a disgusting glare. “Asshole. That was so uncalled for.”
He shrugs. “I’ve never met one of your boyfriends before.”
“He’s not my fucking boyfriend,” I snap. “And even if he was, what the hell was that? Were you trying to embarrass me?”
“No,” he lies. “I was just being friendly—aren’t we friends?”
I huff. “Whatever,” I mutter. “That was—”
“Stick around until the end and I’ll give you a ride home.”
“No,” I say immediately, shaking my head. “No.”
He puckers his lips and nods. “Yeah. I think I will.” His mouth pulls into a shit-eating grin and it hits me like a slap in the face.
“Thirty minutes. I’ll meet you by the car.
” There’s no room to argue. Not when he’s casted some kind of fucking spell on me.
He taps me on the cheek with his glove before skating off, leaving me dead in my tracks.
There is something seriously wrong with me.
I don’t dare turn and look at the driver’s seat. I’ve already given him the satisfaction of getting in his car. But I can’t help myself. I’m just too far gone.
“You hungry?” Parker asks, tapping his fingers against the steering wheel.
The buzz of soft rock music fills the car, but for some reason the only thing I can focus on hearing is the sound of my own heart drumming in my chest. Anger, frustration. Weakness. I have no one to blame but myself for getting into the car.
“No,” I murmur. “Had something earlier from the concession stand.”
“No you didn’t.”
I exhale sharply through my nose.
“I’ll make you some lunch.”
Finally, I turn and look at him. “I thought you were taking me back to my dorm.”
Parker shrugs casually. “Lunch first.”
“So this is a kidnapping.”
“Don’t act like you don’t want this,” he tells me, lowering his voice.
My entire body flashes with heat. Guilt pings through me, binding me to his each and every whim. I do want this. Deep down, I’m enjoying this. Being wanted like this. This is what being friends with Parker is like. Having lunch together. Having a casual chat in the car…
I’m just lying to myself. There’s nothing casual about the way he’s looking at me right now. No. He’s looking at me like he’s read every thought in the back of my mind. He smiles at me like he’s the only person who can interpret the very language spoken in my soul.
“Okay,” I murmur plainly. “Then what is this? What’s the end goal here?”
“To ruin your day, maybe,” he smirks.
I roll my eyes and laugh incredulously. “You’re unbelievable.”
“So,” Parker starts, setting a plate down on the kitchen island in front of me. Just a plain peanut butter and honey sandwich because he knows I don’t really like the texture of jelly. “This Seth guy…” He pops the tab on a sprite and pours it into a glass before sliding the glass over to me.
“What?” I shrug, immediately taking a sip. “I’m twenty years old, Park.”
“I know,” he murmurs quickly, swallowing a bite of crust. “So you two—”
“That’s not important.”
“Well how long have you known him?”
“A few months.”
“And you like him?”
“He’s funny.”
“Funny.” Parker nods slowly. “That’s your type?”
I huff. “I don’t—why are you interrogating me all of a sudden?”
“I’m not interrogating you, sweetheart, I’m just asking.” He looks away for a moment and sighs. “What do your friends think of him?”
“Aviva wants me to fall in love with him. Lee is obsessed with him. Charlie likes everyone.”
“Interesting.” Parker says after a moment. Then takes a sip of his water.
“And what do your friends think of me?” he asks curiously.
“What?” I laugh. “I don’t really talk to my friends about you.”
He looks shocked to hear that. “Why not?”
“Does Luca know about our little friendship?” I ask him.
Deep down, though, he knows what I’m actually wondering. Does Luca know how often we’re hanging out in the privacy of his townhouse? Does he know that Parker calls me after his games to ask me about my day?
“Nope.” The corner of his mouth tugs into a small smile. “Does that upset you?”
“I think it’s probably a good idea he doesn’t know…”
“Yeah? Why’s that?”
I shrug. “Dunno. He would probably get the wrong idea, I guess. Don’t you think?”
“Right,” Parker nods, pursing his lips. “It’s probably smart we keep this thing we have between the two of us.”
My chest constricts a little. “Well don’t say it like that.”
He gives me a curious look wanting—not urging me to explain myself further. So, I do.
“Don’t say it like we’re doing something…bad,” I explain. “Cause that’s not what this is.”
“Of course not,” he shakes his head. “Anders, I…” he pauses for a moment like he’s reminding himself to be careful. “You know I care about you. You mean a lot to me.”
I don’t know exactly why, but his words don’t impact me the way they should. It just feels like he’s telling me this as a way to explain himself. To explain why he has no problem sitting down with me at his kitchen island in the middle of his rare day off to eat a sandwich with me.
“You don’t have to explain yourself like that,” I tell him. And maybe because I know it’s what he needs to hear, I tell him, “you’re just looking out for me like you always have.”
“Yeah,” he nods, taking another bite of his sandwich.
“I feel like talking to you is good for my brain,” I admit after a stretch of silence. “It wards away all the shit that always makes my head hurt.”
His mouth curls into a slight grin. “I guess I’m…a medical professional.”
“Right,” I exhale through my nose and laugh. “Unlicensed medical professional.”
“Historically, we’re the best at our jobs. Just doing it for the love of the game.”
“You’re okay, I guess,” I smirk. “I’d never complain about free healthcare.”
“Woah, woah, woah,” he mutters dramatically. “Who said anything about it being free?”
“I pay for it with the pleasure of my company.”
“Well now I feel like I should be compensated just for enduring that.”
“Rude,” I scoff playfully. “I’m a very pleasant person to be around.”
“Sometimes you are.”
“Pet’ka, you kidnapped me. Obviously, I’m good company.”
Parker rolls his eyes. “That’s not why I kidnapped you.”
“Okay, then why?”
Something shifts after those words slip past my lips.
Maybe it’s just the way the conversation stalls out.
Maybe it’s the fact that Parker doesn’t immediately answer.
The house suddenly feels too quiet. Parker sets his water down on the island.
His fingers tap once against the glass before he hooks his foot around the leg of my barstool and pulls me closer.
The movement catches me off guard, causing my pulse to spike. “Pet’ka—”
“I just think,” Parker murmurs, “I’m not the biggest fan of that Seth guy.”
I huff out a laugh. “Why not?”
“I just don’t like him.”
Something warm rushes through me. “That’s not a valid reason, though.”
Parker leans back against the counter and folds his arms across his chest. “I don’t really need a reason, Anders.”
I open my mouth to argue, but the look he gives me makes the words die in my throat.
Parker holds my gaze for a second too long, then his eyes flick down to my mouth. Boldly. My breathing immediately catches. “You know what bothers me?” he asks.
“What?”
“I think you just trust people a little too easily.”
I roll my eyes. “Jesus, Pet’ka—”
“No, I’m serious.”
“Yeah, so am I.”
He lets out a quiet sigh and drags a hand across his beard. “So you met him at a party and now you’re best friends all of a sudden?”
“What?” I scoff. “There’s nothing wrong with meeting someone my own age at a party—”
“So you like him because he’s your age—”
“Oh my God.” I cut him off before he can finish, laughing thinly.
“What is that supposed to mean?” Parker’s jaw tightens.