Chapter Four #2
When she sobered, she shook her head. “Either you forget how well I know you, or you’re deluding yourself.
There is no way you get me to your territory, and you don’t turn into a crazy alpha, beat your chest, and snarl at every opposition I give you, Wolfman.
But it’s nice that you tried to give me the lamb and thought I’d fall for it. ”
She was going back with him whether she wanted to or not, but he was a smart enough man not to say so. It would be far better to talk her into going with him of her own free will.
“I get it, Lyric.” He nearly snarled it, pouring contempt into his voice. He didn’t look at her, but he stopped massaging her foot. “You don’t like clubs. You think I haven’t run into that prejudice before? You always want honesty, well, try it yourself.”
She pulled her foot right off his lap. “What are you talking about? How did you get I don’t like clubs from what I just said?”
“Do you?”
“No. But the only one I’ve been around is the Headed for Hell club, and the newer members are assholes.
They walk around like they own every establishment in town.
Those members are entitled, even when they’re trying to keep a low profile.
So no, I don’t like them, but I wasn’t comparing your club to theirs.
I just am not good around a lot of people I don’t know. ”
“These people are my family.”
Lyric took a deep breath. “Exactly, Keys. You want me to go home with you to your family. I don’t know what family is. I can’t cope with that. I’m not exactly normal, or did you miss that? I stay to myself for a reason.”
“Because you’re on the run.” He softened his voice but kept the mask. The one she hated. The one she knew wasn’t real.
“Because I’m not normal,” she corrected.
“What the fuck is normal?” Now they were getting somewhere. She was letting him into something she guarded carefully.
Her gaze shifted from his. “Why are you doing this? What does it matter where I go when you take off? We already talked about this.”
He was hurting her. His heart clenched. His gut followed suit. There was raw pain in her voice. She couldn’t fake that. That was the last thing he meant to do. He’d stumbled onto something big. Something important. He realized she had been holding back more than the fact that she was on the run.
Lyric reached for her shoes and he caught her wrist, preventing her from getting them. He didn’t release her arm, even when she tried to jerk away from him. He was twice her size and far stronger. For a moment she struggled, and then she let him retain possession, but she kept her face averted.
“Babe, stop. Just take a breath. You can’t take off on me. Just breathe. Let’s start this over. I need to know what you meant when you said you aren’t normal. It’s important. You’re safe with me. You know that. I’m your safe place. Always. We might get pissed at each other, but you’re always safe.”
She retreated into her silence, sliding her mask into place every bit as easily as he had done. They were such a pair. That right there showed him they were meant to be together for whatever purpose.
“Don’t do that to me, Wildfire.” He used the voice, the one he knew got under her skin. The one that usually got him what he wanted.
It didn’t work. She just kept looking away from him, a frozen mouse with a predator looming over her. Not his Wildfire. Something else. Someone else.
“Eyes to me.” He dropped the nice, allowing Keys the killer out. The one everyone but his woman feared. She didn’t fear him, and she always obeyed reluctantly, but she always followed his commands. She did this time, her gaze shifting to his.
It was all he could do not to wince under the blazing intensity of her emerald eyes and the pain there.
Real pain. So raw, so real he couldn’t take it.
He reached for her, ignoring the way she shrank back.
She was light and tiny. His hands settled around her waist, and he lifted her easily, taking her onto his lap, surrounding her with his arms, creating a fortress for her.
He waited until she settled, thankful for the hours he’d held her in the coffin and after, when they lay skin-to-skin, warming each other.
Her body remembered his, and the stiffness left her fast, allowing her to sink into him.
He rocked her gently, letting her mind remember he’d been her safe haven for months.
He had been accepting of her, just as she’d been of him.
He’d been so careful to close all those doors on his past, never let the memories see the light of day, but he hadn’t considered that anyone else, least of all his Wildfire, would have trauma to equal his.
Whatever she had gone through, whatever made her feel her lack of being “normal” was dangerous to her, was every bit as bad as what he kept locked behind those doors.
“You’re safe with me, Lyric. You’re always safe with me. In case you haven’t noticed, I’m not normal either. Fuck normal. We make our own. We live free and make our own rules.”
She clung to him, her arms around his neck, her face buried against his chest, but he felt her nod. Her breath was warm on his throat.
“I wouldn’t hurt you for the world, baby,” he confided. “As important as I am to you, you are to me. We can do anything if we’re together. Think about that. I can face my demons and yours as well. That’s what I do. That’s who I am. I’m that for you.”
She nodded again, burrowing closer. “I’m sorry I freaked out on you.”
“Don’t be sorry, Lyric. You don’t have to apologize to me.
Not ever. Whatever you think I’m giving you, it will never equal what you give me.
I choose to be with you. You’re always going to be my choice.
I want to be your choice.” He felt a little silly giving her that, but it was the truth.
He didn’t have any idea what he would do with her, but he knew he didn’t want to lose her.
“You don’t want to come home with me, I’ll tell my club I need time off and go with you into your wilderness.”
She was silent a moment and then she lifted her head, her vivid green eyes meeting his. “You would do that?”
“Yes. I need to know you’re safe, and you aren’t right now. You won’t be until we can clean this mess up with the Headed for Hell club.”
“You have important things you do for the club,” she reminded him. “You haven’t said much about what you do, but you spent three months basically undercover trying to find evidence that the club is trafficking.”
“Baby, I’m no saint. Don’t view me or my club as the good guys. I told you how we were trained.”
“I have firsthand knowledge of you putting your skills to good use. You caught the scissors in the rain and threw them with amazing accuracy. I was impressed.”
“We’re not talking about the scissors. Every time I think about what you risked for me, I have a violent reaction. You aren’t going to like the results when I finally give in to my baser tendencies.”
That got him her laughter. She was back. His. He was going to uncover her secrets. It was necessary for the both of them. He just had to do it carefully.
“I don’t do family, Keys. Not specifically your family, but any family. I don’t know how. Family would be a trigger for me. If you really knew me, you’d find I have a lot of them, just like the coffin thing.”
“You handled that better than most people, men or women, I know. You did fine, babe. Fear doesn’t mean you’re weak. You overcome every obstacle in your way.”
She shook her head, once again avoiding his eyes by laying her cheek on his chest. “I run. That’s what I do. That’s what I’m good at. I can hide in plain sight if I have to.”
He got her eyes briefly, and then she looked away again.
“I don’t want you to think it’s you or your club.
I just can’t fit in. I never fit in. I’d end up making you crazy.
You said you live free, and I want that for you.
I would have to wear my mask and pretend.
I’d be a mimic just to ensure I didn’t embarrass you.
Eventually, it would get to be too difficult, and I’d take off anyway. ”
Not normal. The definition hung in the air between them.
She didn’t look at anyone. She was always perfect in her interactions with others.
A mimic. What the hell was wrong with him?
She was neurodivergent. Whatever trauma had occurred had happened because she was different.
Lyric did her best to never appear different.
She had a problem with family. What did that mean? What had happened to her to make her believe she wasn’t good enough?
“Gotta work through this, Wildfire. You don’t give a damn about what I do, you really don’t.
I don’t give a damn that you’re different.
I like your different, and I hope you like mine.
Because there is nothing normal about me.
You saw me because of that. That’s how we connected in the first place.
What’s normal about needing pussy every few hours and still not being satisfied?
Tell me how that shit is normal. When someone is in my way, the first thought I have is removing them.
Is that normal? Babe, we were meant to stay close.
That’s why we’re both different. We were meant. ”
He felt the tremor that ran through her, and he tightened his arms, surrounding her with a fortress. “I know it’s difficult to believe in anyone when you’ve never been able to, but you read me like a book, Lyric. You know I mean what I say. You’re safe. It’s safe to share with me.”
“They didn’t want me.” Her tone was so low he barely caught the confession. And it was a confession. There was guilt in her voice, as if she were to blame for whoever had thrown her away.