Chapter Twenty-One
Summer?
The morning has been a blur so far. Sitting in the church, I’ve managed to keep it together for now. Occasionally, I pull my coat tighter around myself as the chills keep sweeping through my body. Bhodi’s fingers link with mine, I lift my head slightly and side-eye him. He offers a quick wink and a smile whilst I try to remain strong.
As the coffin is placed at the front of the church, I try to remain focused on the spray of white Lillies which lay on the coffin. I feel the thick knot slowly forming in my throat as my hand begins to shake uncontrollably in Bhodi’s.
As the tears blur my vision, the distant tapping of heels pulls my attention away. Slowly turning around in the church, I spot a familiar woman moving towards James Kressler. He offers her a small smile as she takes her seat next to him, I manage to catch her eye. My jaw falls open for a moment, and I blink a couple of times. But she merely offers a polite and sad half smile before focusing on the front of the church.
Pamela? The receptionist from the hotel?
Snapping my jaw shut, my brow furrows as she offers little else during this moment. Glancing around, the church is busier than I expected. I’d managed to avoid the pitiful gazes from the attendees and have been on autopilot since arriving. Swallowing hard, my eyes land on the four unwanted people nearing the back.
Shit…
Before I can catch their eye, I manage to turn back as my grip on Bhodi’s hand tightens. He shoots me a questioning look as I hold his gaze. He leans in closer before whispering.
“What is it?” Clearly, the alarm is plastered all over my face. As the fear begins to swarm my body.
Swallowing hard, I try to keep my voice low and not allow my concern to show in case they’re watching me.
“Don’t turn around, but he’s…. Harry is here.” I manage to get the words out, but really, all I want to do is vomit all over the floor and run as far away as I can.
Anger flickers across Bhodi’s face, his eyes stormy as his jaw tenses. He takes a deep breath before wrapping his arm around me and sliding me closer along the pew. His lips lower to my ear.
“Take a deep breath, he wouldn’t dare fucking touch you, not while I’m here, ok?”
Drenched in dread, I manage to nod, holding back the tears as the service begins. My eyes fall onto the coffin once again. Swallowing hard, I don’t hear the words which are spoken. I’m terrified that if I do, I’ll fall apart. As my head falls to Bhodi’s chest, I squeeze my eyes shut and allow myself to listen to the rhythm of his heartbeat.
All the hairs on the back of my neck rise, I know Harry, the stranger, Eric, and my mom have spotted me. I can feel their eyes burning holes into my skin, but I refuse to turn back around.
After a deep breath, I find my mind drifting off to a happier time. A time when my dad was alive and well, and I had just landed in New York for a summer trip. We’d headed out for lunch in the afternoon. I smile as I recall the burger sauce getting all over his shirt, the utter annoyance followed by humor due to his clumsy action. I replay us both doubled over laughing as the napkins on the table did nothing but smear it further into the fabric.
Every now and then, his murder seems to hit me hard in the chest. I know it happened, but it’s as though I need a bigger reminder of what happened to him. I know it hasn’t been long, but it feels like his killer has been out walking the streets for years. I know they haven’t and investigations don’t just get solved overnight. But with everything that has happened so quickly, is someone watching us? Making sure we’re always aware of the threat surrounding us.
I can’t help but allow my body to shift, staring towards the back of the church. Eric and my mom appear to be watching the service. For a moment, she even looks a little sad as Eric keeps his arm around her. Narrowing my eyes, I feel anger wash through me, as the selfish bitch seems to be playing the part of the doting widow well, even if she made his life miserable along with mine.
This is an additional nail in the coffin that confirms I will never have a relationship with my mom again, not after her behavior. Money and status meant more to her than I ever did. She allowed me to fall into a trap with a monster and didn’t care. She cast me aside to enjoy her perfect life with Eric. Even if it was built on corruption and possibly crime.
Swallowing hard, I try to push past the rage within me. Not allow it to ruin the send-off for my dad. However, as my eyes move to the side, I see Harry. His eyes narrow on me like I’m the prey he’s been watching for hours, he’s savoring the moment until he can pounce and tear me apart. His lips curl into a sinister smile. I hold his stare, refusing to show him weakness or fear.
I never thought I would see the day when I defied him, but the moment I hit him with the bottle and fled to New York, it was a slippery slope. I’d escaped Harry, and he didn’t like it one fucking bit. This was on my terms and not his, so he’s doing everything he can to let me know he isn’t far away.
When my eyes finally land at the end pew, the dark-haired man stares ahead. He’s staring directly at the back of Bhodi’s head. His ice-cold eyes never flicker, never move, and certainly don’t look my way. He’s the same man who was at the bar the afternoon Bhodi and I went for a drink. I know he’s a dangerous man, but Bhodi has never told me how he knows him, and it’s likely because the story doesn’t have a happy ending.
Turning to face the front, I try to take in the words being spoken, but the fact remains, gnawing at my gut like it has from the moment I heard the news.
Someone killed my dad, I still don’t know who, and I don’t know why.
An eerie thought shudders through my body, a flicker of chaos followed by a heavy wave of darkness as it descends over the service.
What if someone here did it? What if it was Harry?
My heartbeat intensifies and I feel the adrenaline pumping through my veins, telling me I need to run because it’s clearly unsafe. But it feels as though in this city, nothing is.
We all stand up as the service finishes. I watch through teary eyes as the coffin disappears behind the curtain. Multiple footsteps begin shuffling towards the church”s main door, but I take a moment to watch the curtain fully close before turning away.
Bhodi stands at the end of the pew as I turn to face him, holding out his hand. I take mine in his as he begins to lead me from the church. An undeniable sadness begins to consume me when it dawns on me: I’ll never see my dad again.
“Are you ready? I can stay if you need a minute.” Bhodi asks.
“Would you mind if I sat here for a moment alone?”
He gives me a half smile; his eyes quickly dart towards the exit of the church. I follow his eyesight as most attendees have left or are leaving. A few familiar faces seem to hang by the door, hoping to catch me on my way out, but I just need a moment.
“I’ll be right by the door, ok?”
I nod as Bhodi moves towards the door. As he turns away, I can’t help but admire his dark suit. The way it hugs his perfect body, how it’s fitted so perfectly to each muscle, as he walks away, I can’t help but let out a low breath. I know we’ll have to part ways soon, because as of now, I have no reason to be in New York. There are no friends, no family, and no work for me, and with that, I feel my heart hurt.
“Excuse me, Miss Harper. Is everything ok?”
I move my focus towards the gentle voice. I throw my hand over my heart. I take a deep breath and shake my head.
“I’m so sorry Father Dudley, I…”
“Oh no, please, I apologize. I didn’t mean to startle you.” I can’t help but smile at the worn denim blue eyes that are kindly looking at me right now.
“It was a lovely service, thank you, I know it would have made my dad happy.” I feel my voice break as I fight to finish the sentence.
The priest gestures for me to sit. As I sit down, he sits beside me, looking towards the altar. As his shoulders sag, he bows his head slightly.
“Your father was a very good man, Miss Harper. I hope one day you’ll be able to understand just how good he was.”
I turn my head to face him, his comment causes my eyes to narrow slightly. I gently nod my head before looking back to the altar.
“I know how good he was, I just wish we could spend more time together.”
“I’m sure you’ll see him again.” He offers me a kind smile before rising from the pew. “The ashes will be ready for collection in a few days. James gave me your number, but I’m happy to call him if you prefer?”
I blink a couple of times as I take in his question. Turning to the priest I nod.
“Thank you, please call me. I’ll be here.”
Standing from the pew, I take one final look at the altar before exiting the church. Walking past the empty pews, the short walk feels like a lifetime before I reach the door. Stepping back into the afternoon air, I glance up at the dark grey clouds that threaten to pour down.
I feel Bhodi’s presence at my side. As I look towards him, he smiles, but the angry snap of his name soon pulls our focus to the angry balding man approaching us.
“Fuck sake.” Bhodi mutters as I quickly shoot him a questioning look.
Once the man is in front of us, his angry features soften slightly when he sees me.
“Detective Grey, you aren’t meant to be working today? I thought we agreed it was best you took a couple of days off.” His tone is clipped, and I can tell he’s pissed off.
Looking between the two men, I step away. I didn’t know Bhodi wasn’t working at the moment. It makes sense after Detective Strode was hurt that a few days away from the precinct could help.
After a couple minutes, I catch the man out of the corner of my eye heading back down the concrete steps and heading for a waiting car on the sidewalk. Turning to Bhodi, I quirk a brow.
“In trouble?”
He smirks, before sliding his arm around my shoulder and pulling me close. Placing a gentle kiss on my forehead, his lips linger against my skin when he speaks quietly.
“It’s worth it for you.”
I look towards him, his arrogant smirk plastered all over his face. I can’t help but smile and shake my head at the same time, giving him a gentle nudge.
“I don’t want you getting in trouble because of me.”
“I `haven’t, I explained to the captain I’m just here paying my respects, and if it helps keep Harry and Luca away from you, then it’s a win-win.” He shrugs.
I feel myself deflate when he mentions them, looking away briefly. I scan the surrounding area in case they could still be watching. Feeling Bhodi’s warm hand on my chin, he pulls my focus back to him. For a moment, he searches my eyes.
Fear like that doesn’t just go away, no matter how much I will it to or try to remain positive. I know it’ll take time and a hell of a lot of distance before I stop looking over my shoulder.
“Is Luca the guy with Harry?” When I ask the question, I watch as Bhodi stiffens.
He delicately pushes my hair away from my face, his palm cupping my cheeks as his eyes soften.
“You don’t have to worry about him. He won’t be a problem soon.”
I swallow hard at that statement. The bluntness of the comment tells me all I need to know.
“Who is he, Bhodi?”
“He’s a dangerous man, the worst kind of person. He has no loyalty, no conscience, and will work for whoever is paying.”
My eyes widen, processing Bhodi’s words. Blinking a couple of times, I begin to choke on my words, a lump forming in my throat, trying to understand the hidden meaning behind the comment.
“Do you think he killed my dad?” Managing to speak, I hear my voice break.
Bhodi swallows hard, feeling his hand tense slightly against my cheek. My eyes dart around his face, looking for an answer.
“I believe it’s possible, yes.”
I immediately pull away, slapping his hand away as the rage and sadness begins to crawl over me.
“Then why has no one fucking arrested him then?” I spit out.
Shaking my head, I take a couple of steps back. Trying to create distance between us as my hands begin to tremble. The thought of the man who killed my dad, having the fucking audacity to attend the funeral of the man he killed, seems so fucking heartless and cruel, and Harry was there, waving it in my face. Taunting me with his smug fucking grin, knowing he knew something I didn’t.
“We can’t arrest someone with no fucking evidence, can we? If we did and the case was thrown out, it means we have nothing, and that bastard walks!”
Bhodi snaps back at me, the frustration clear in his voice. As my bottom lip begins to tremble and more tears threaten to fall, I try to move away. After a couple of steps, I feel his firm grasp around my wrist, tugging me towards him.
I brace my palms against his chest, refusing to fall into his warm embrace. As much as I need to, I just can’t. Shaking my head, I push away again. Running a frustrated hand through my hair, I look towards the busy street.
Seeing all the yellow cabs driving by, I decide my best option is to head home. I feel the waves of sickness begin to wash over me, the exhaustion and the many questions swimming through my mind.
“I need to go home.”
“I’ll take you.”
Taking a step forward, I put my hand out for Bhodi to stop. For a moment, I see a flicker of disappointment cross his face as he halts.
“I’ll get a cab; I just want to be alone.”
I turn away and proceed down the steps, refusing to look back. Stepping onto the curb, I hold out my hand, and within a few seconds, one pulls up. Sliding into the backseat, it pulls away and I allow my head to fall back into the headrest, hot tears streaming down my cheeks.