Chapter 25
Court had the worst luck. Aaron and Dylan looked confused. Maybe they didn’t know exactly what was happening, but they had to be able to put two and two together. It was the first time she had touched Stephanie all weekend, and she had been caught doing it.
Deciding to talk her way out of the situation, Court plastered a fake smile on her face and, without looking Stephanie’s way, she asked the men, “How was the water?”
“Good,” Dylan admitted, but ducked his head in embarrassment. They all knew it was him who had pushed away the boat, and he was now convinced she was going to let him have it.
“Get any fishing done?”
“Not with so many people in the boat. Maybe we’ll go out later. Did you want to go this time?” Aaron asked with a smirk.
“No, I don’t like blood sports.” She shivered at the thought of it.
“There’s no blood in fishing.” Dylan argued with her.
“Oh, you're fishing that way. So lame.” Court had no idea what she was talking about. She knew little to nothing about fishing and didn’t think there was a way to catch fish that would involve blood.
“We can’t seem to get Dad on board for the other kind.” Aaron confided, as if that made him look better, that he knew what she was talking about.
“I’m sure.” She shook her head as Laura and her kids came into the house, taking up all the space and conversation. Suddenly, she missed the empty house she had just had. This was just too many people.
It took more than an hour for Calvin and Marlene to return after everyone else had come back.
Once again it was almost mealtime, and Marlene scurried to the kitchen, taking Laura and Stephanie as she went.
The roles of the sexes were clearly defined by the older couple, and nobody argued it.
Stephanie just jumped to her feet and followed her mom.
“Boys, can I get some help with the grill?” Calvin announced to nobody in particular.
“I can help.” Jumping up, Court slipped her phone into her pocket. She had managed to beat everyone else out the door, so when she made it out, he was actually alone at the grill.
“I can do that if you want?” She asked, even though she knew he wouldn’t take her up on the offer.
“No, no, I’ll do it.” Jumping in surprise at her voice, he looked up at her as he mumbled and turned the knobs again, but nothing happened.
“Hey, while we are alone, can we talk?” She asked, looking around, wondering how long before someone noticed they were alone and came outside to get between them.
“Sure, I guess. What did you want to talk about?” Setting the brush down, he sounded more annoyed than happy she wanted to talk about the past. Or maybe it was just because they were talking to each other one on one.
“About Healing Harbors.” She said the place that haunted her worst nightmares.
“I don’t know what that is.”
“It was a camp.” She said the word, but it was such an innocent word compared to the place she was sent.
“I don’t see your mom letting you go camping. Did you have fun?” He asked as he adjusted the knobs again, but nothing happened.
“No, I didn’t. It was after I ran away from here that last summer, when Helene found me, she sent me there.” She said. “Did you know about it? Did you know what kind of place it was?”
Knobs adjusted, he finally turned to her. “I remember her telling me she sent you someplace because you were going through a lot at the time and they could help. Rebelling in a way that you never had before. You needed a stronger hand than either of us could provide.”
“Did you look into it at all? Were you interested in what sort of place it was?” She asked, needing to know every answer she could get from him while she could. Even if it was that he didn’t remember enough.
“Honestly, Courtney, you were out of control at that point. If I remember correctly, you hadn’t been home in weeks, and Helene had no idea where you even were during that time.”
“Were you worried about me, too?” She asked, because that wasn’t a word he had used. Had he even thought about her after she was gone, or was he just relieved she wasn’t at his home? With his family?
But he didn’t answer the question that she most wanted to hear, the one that would say he had still cared about her.
Instead, he went on with his excuses. “You needed something, and if a scared straight program would do it, I was for it. What happened to Dylan couldn’t have been an isolated incident? ”
“Scared straight? That’s what you thought it was? Did you approve of that?” She demanded. He made it sound like she should have been happy she had been sent there, that it had been for her benefit.
Turning back to the knobs, he didn’t face her as he told her, “It was years ago, Courtney. I had no idea what was happening in your life at that time. I had four kids here who needed me, so if Helene said you should go to some camp, I agreed with her.”
Leaning back against the railing, she held on to it tight behind her back, not wanting him to see her stress.
“I know Helene called you, that she asked if I could come and live with you and Marlene for a while. I overheard the phone call before she sent me there. Do you remember that? That she was done with me, and if you wanted me, you should come and get me that day. Why didn’t you want me here with you? ”
Calvin turned back to her. “You gave Dylan a black eye. Marlene would never have approved you coming here, and I wouldn’t ask her to. Helene was having such a hard time keeping control of you, and I didn’t need that in my house around my kids full time.”
“Your kids.” Court caught the words and felt the pain of it, even if she already knew how he felt.
She wasn’t his kid, just a promise he no longer wanted to keep.
These kids were, “Did you ever think about me? When Aaron graduated and you knew I was the same age. Did you ever try to find me? Care what happened to me? Think about me?”
He shrugged. “Helene said you were doing great, that you were thriving being away from here. What was the point in bringing you back and risking you back peddling?”
“Which means, no, you never thought about me.”
“You’re twisting my words. We did what we thought was best for you, and if that was a camp. I approved.” His words cut her, but she had her answer. He had approved and never looked back.
Needing to know everything, Court pushed.
Running a hand through her hair, she tried not to lose her temper and failed.
“Can you just say that you never gave a fuck about me? That once you got kids of your own, you had no use for me anymore. That once I was gone, you were glad you didn’t have to deal with me anymore? ”
“Stop talking to him like that, Courtney.” Dylan stated, getting between the two of them, as if Court would resort to violence.
“It’s Court, and I want an answer from him,” she yelled and turned back to her father. “Did you ever give a fuck about me?”
Grabbing her arm, Dylan pulled her away from the older man. “And I said, leave him alone. No wonder he regrets inviting you this weekend.”
Court realized that this wasn’t worth the effort and emotion she was putting herself through. They would never be the parents she had spent her lifetime so desperately wanting. She had known that before even coming.
In complete annoyance, she spun and went into the house, passing Aaron, who was coming out of the house, probably to help Calvin like he had asked them.
Past Marlene and the girls in the kitchen without a word, she went right to the bathroom.
Needing some time alone to get herself together.
This was the only room in the house she knew she could get some privacy.
Not that she wasn’t a hundred percent sure she needed to leave. But she wasn’t about to show anyone in this family how much they had hurt her. Once she was calm, she’d walk out of this house and away from these people forever. Never would she look back again. All of her questions were answered.
Stephanie knocked on the door quietly. “Court, are you okay?”
“Fine, I just need a few minutes.” Leaning against the vanity, she took some calming breaths as she planned her escape. She couldn’t stay here anymore, she knew enough.
“Can I come in?” She asked, but opened the door as she did. Not giving her any options.
“I’d prefer if you didn’t.” Court wiped a wayward tear away from her cheek. It had been years since she had let herself cry, and she hated that she was doing it now. That Calvin Morrissey had made her feel again. There was no room in her life for feelings.
Stephanie shut the door and walked over to her, touching her cheek gently. “I heard some of what you asked. I wish I knew the answers you were looking for with him. When you weren’t here, he never talked about you that I can remember.”
Crossing her arms, Court told her, “There are no answers. None that would make up for everything that happened. Make it better.”
“When did you stop seeing your mom?” Stephanie kept her distance in the small room.
“Around the same time, I stopped seeing Calvin.”
“But you were still in school? Where did you live?”
“Not with her, and thanks to your mom, not with the guy I once thought of as a father. It was during a rough time in my life. Not that anyone cared.”
“I always assumed you were still in contact with her. That she was the parent you spent time with, since that’s how it was when you were a kid. Why don’t you talk to her?” Stopping a foot from her, Stephanie almost touched her arm, but stopped herself.
Looking up, she willed the tears to stay in her eyes. “You can say we have different outlooks on life.”
“She doesn’t approve of your being gay?” Stephanie surmised.
Nodding at her answer, Court hated how much Stephanie seemed to understand her. To know things even when she wasn’t told. “That’s the big one. She knows my work number, but only because it’s on the internet. I never gave it to her.”
“You do know that Calvin doesn’t have the same opinion?”
“Because he’s so accepting of your sexuality? You’re so willing to bend over backwards to be the person your parents want you to be instead of who you are. Well, I'm not. I’m who I'm and I don’t give a damn what others think. If that means I'm alone in the world, so be it.”
“Why are you here if not looking for parental approval?”
“You wouldn’t understand.”
“Try me.”
Court took a deep breath and almost did.
It was on the tip of her tongue, except after the emotional ringer she had already put herself through, she knew she couldn’t handle any more.
So instead, she went with cutting all ties with everyone in the entire family, which was for the best. “I don’t talk about my personal life with the women I fuck. ”
Turning, she heard the woman gasp and wanted to take it back, but she knew she needed to get as far from everyone in this family as she could get. And that meant leaving Stephanie knowing exactly where she stood. Far, far away.
Pushing herself out the door, she slammed it before noticing Marlene looking at her from her bedroom door, who noticed instantly that Stephanie was in the bathroom with Court.
What she thought of that wasn’t hidden on her face.
She was beyond angry about the situation.
Or what she assumed the situation was, because it wasn’t that.
Before Marlene said a word, Court slammed the bathroom door closed as she rushed past her heading for the living room.
Not looking at anyone, she grabbed her things.
Stephanie could deal with Marlene’s reaction to catching them talking in a bathroom.
This was no longer Court’s fight. She was done with these people.
Court said nothing to anyone else, even if they were all watching as she walked through the house, head held high. There was nothing anyone could say now that could make her stay. Her past was once again her past, and she didn’t want to think about it anymore.
Out the front door, she walked to her car and tossed her bags in the passenger seat. No need to waste time putting anything anywhere else. Time was short, and she needed to distance herself from these people. Every one of them, Stephanie included.
Ty was right. She would never get the kind of closure she needed. Not from Calvin. It would only come from within herself. But that wasn’t happening today. Right now, she was too raw, too emotional. She felt like the kid who had fled this house years ago, just needing to be away.