Unbound (The Dominator #3)

Chapter 10

10

The trip home was uneventful, thankfully. Tommy and I dropped Tessa, Sarah, and the boys off at Tessa’s house. Tessa didn’t want to go back to Tom and Lisa’s. She said she needed to feel near to Jim and it was time to get the boys back into their own beds.

Tommy wasn’t so sure, but Tessa insisted. He sent security there, to stay with her, and Sarah said she’d bounce back and forth between Tessa’s and Lisa’s. If Tessa wanted her full-time, she’d talk it over with Lisa.

Sarah told me, on the side, she was worried about them both. Lisa and Tess needed one another right now but they hadn’t talked since lunch at Venetia when Lisa revealed where she came from.

Tessa had been quiet, subdued, like me I suppose. Sarah had been chatty, trying to take care of everyone.

I was sick in my heart. For what they’d gone through. For what we’d just gone through. And I never wanted to see Sin City again. The first time there nearly broke me.

This time? This time my heart was in tatters. I had a meltdown and a fight with Tommy. I saw my sister-in-law in a state of shock and utter heartbreak after being kidnapped and raped.

I almost got kidnapped or could’ve been killed in an explosion that took seven lives. Someone I knew, a mother of six, Katie “Cupcake” Lewis was dead.

I watched my husband kill another man with a bullet to his face. I watched my husband beat up a half-dead monster and then heard that monster get sodomized as I was forced to listen.

If Tommy ever tried to take me to Vegas again, he'd have to drag me kicking and screaming.

I was relieved to be home. He was preoccupied so he said nothing when I went right up to bed. I didn’t think I’d sleep. I figured I’d watch TV. But as per usual, I fell asleep.

A phone was ringing. Tommy’s phone. He answered it and left the room. The room was illuminated by our television’s splash screen. I guess he’d probably come in to our bedroom and when it rang, he left to answer it.

I sat up and glanced at our alarm clock. It was almost midnight and I was starving. I hadn’t had an appetite that day. But right now, my stomach was growling.

I got up and padded down the stairs toward the kitchen and heard him on the phone.

“Slit his fuckin’ throat. Yep. Only wish it could be done again. Really? Right. Did she? Yeah, man. I’ll pick the pup up in the morning. Bye.”

He saw me in the doorway.

“Hey baby girl.”

He looked tired.

“Hi.” I was frozen in place. Slit throat. Did Tommy kill Leo himself?

Dario’s words from after Mexico rang in my head.

“Pop would’ve sent someone to do it for him. But my brother? Tommy will do it himself.”

“Get over here.” He put his phone on the kitchen counter.

I walked into his arms. He inhaled my hair.

“Wrong,” he whispered.

“Hm?”

“When we’re home, you use a different shampoo. When shit’s bad, your hair almost always smells wrong.”

“A sign we shouldn’t leave the house?”

“Maybe. Or you pack your shampoo when we travel.”

“If my hair smells right, things will be right?”

“Wouldn’t that be nice?” He kissed me. “Wanna go take a shower? I’ll wash your hair. Make it smell like home.”

“As nice as that sounds, I came down here for food. I’m starving. Didn’t eat much today. Baby’s hungry.” I patted my belly.

He dropped to his knees and kissed my stomach and then pressed his forehead against it. I threaded my fingers into his hair.

“I love you,” I said.

Yes, he was someone who would kill but he killed to protect what was his. I was his. He was mine. I felt a burst of affection for him. Of course I still felt dread at what I’d heard, but this man? This man was mine. He would keep me safe. I knew it with everything that I was.

“Could’ve been you,” he said.

“Hm?”

“Kate. That could’ve been you. Tess could’ve been you. Kate could’ve been you. Fuck, Tia. My head is fucked over this shit. You could’ve been raped, taken, dead. Some of it. All of it.”

I got to the floor with him and put my arms around him.

“I’m here. I’m okay. You saved me. Like you always do.”

“Johnny and those six kids sure as fuck aren’t okay. Tess isn’t okay.”

“None of this is your fault, honey,” I said.

He shook his head.

“I pushed Leo to this. I insisted he couldn’t be involved in Fete. Shouldn’t have underestimated him. Should’ve fuckin’ taken him out of the equation.”

“No. You can’t go murdering people because they might cause a problem. It’s not your fault what he did. It’s his fault.”

“If I’d taken him out, Tess wouldn’t have gotten raped and stolen from us for a week. If I’d taken him out, Kate would be beside Johnny, there for their kids.”

“You can’t play the ‘what if’ game, Tommy. You can’t play God, either. You can’t stop bad guys from doing bad things.”

“But I can do something. I can do my damndest to make sure nothin’ fuckin’ threatens you or the rest of my family again.”

He left the room with his phone.

I was staring into the refrigerator two hours later.

“Find something to eat?”

This was about two hours later. He stopped behind me and peered in.

“Not what I want,” I grumbled.

“What do you want?”

“Arby’s. Beef and cheddar and curly fries.” I glanced over my shoulder at him.

“Still open?”

“I don’t know. Should be.”

“Let’s go for a drive, hit a drive-thru, and then we’ll come back and take a shower?” He looked flirtily into my eyes.

I smiled hesitantly.

“Make your hair smell like it’s supposed to, maybe I’ll be able to sleep.” He took a handful of my hair and pulled me back against him and then he was cupping my boobs, rubbing his groin against me from behind.

“Okay. I’ll just run and get dressed.”

He was in jeans and a black tee and I was in a little pink chemise nightie so I went upstairs, tied my hair up in a ponytail and threw on jeans and a sweater.

I drove us to Arby’s and we ate in my Jeep in the parking lot, listening to the radio, not talking. I’d wanted to drive. He made a face but relented. I’d only driven my Jeep a couple times so far. I ate a roast beef and gooey cheese sauce sandwich with loads of Arby’s sauce and horsey sauce. The sandwich was huge, their largest, and I ate the whole thing. I ate all my curly fries, and all but two of Tommy’s curly fries.

He watched me eat his fries, dunking them in the cheese and horsey and Arby’s sauce mess that had fallen out of my sandwich and into my sandwich container, with an amused look on his face but didn’t comment. I tried to feed him one but he raised his hand to decline.

He got out and put our garbage into the trash bin and then he came around to the driver’s side. “I’ll drive us home,” he said.

I didn’t argue. I slurped the end of my juice and climbed over to the passenger side.

We were home a few minutes later and I was yawning as we walked inside.

“We gonna get Marley from Luc’s in the morning?” I asked.

“Yep. I was talking to Ed when you woke up from your nap. I’ll pick him up and drop him off before I go to the office.”

“Good. I miss my puppy.”

“Too full to fuck?” he inquired.

“No,” I said slowly. “Don’t think so. The offer to wash my hair sounds too nice. And I suspect if I take a shower with you, fucking is part of the deal.”

“Damn straight. Better do this,” he mumbled absently as he lifted me up in his arms and headed for the stairs.

“Huh? Why are you carrying me?” I asked.

“Because I can,” he said, matter-of-factly. “And who knows how long that’ll continue, the way you’ve been eating.” He smirked boyishly, teasingly.

I smacked his arm. “Not funny.”

He ascended the stairs. “It’s a little funny.”

It was good to see him be playful with all that weighed on him right now. Stuff weighed on me, too, but I would do my best to give him what he needed, whether it was sex, levity, or letting him wash my hair so that it smelled like my usual shampoo, which he seemed to really like.

In the bathroom, the comedy vanished. When he stripped me, he was looking very serious. I had a feeling I was getting Dominator Tommy here, not Ice Cream Parlor Tommy.

Once I was naked, I stripped him, kissing my way down his chest to his jeans, undoing his zipper between my teeth, and then I kissed him on the pelvis right above the root of his cock.

Instead of the badass or the sweetheart, I got Mexico Tommy, the nurturer, who was determined to take care of me like he did when he rescued me from the side of the road in Mexico in the middle of the night.

He hauled me up by my armpits and his jeans pooled at his feet. He stepped out and pulled us toward the shower. Immediately, his hands were in my hair, his lips on mine, and then my back was against the tiled wall. It was cold, so I jolted and my nipples went hard as my flesh broke out in goosebumps.

“Naw. Bath,” he said and we moved to the tub where he twisted the taps and we climbed in for a bath instead of a shower.

She’s told me I’ve got both light and darkness in me. And I’m a lucky fuck because she gets off on both. But right now, I’m trying, like fuck, to let her see only the light. Stopping the darkness from engulfing me is proving to be a challenge.

I need to let out enough of the dark to get shit done but keep it on a tight leash ,so I don’t hurt her. She likes that dark sometimes but it isn’t good for her, especially while she’s pregnant.

I can’t stop thinking about Johnny and Kate. I can’t get my mind off that motherfucker putting his hands on Tessa. I’m thinkin’ about my brother stuck in a sex slave resort trying to pretend to be friends with men who raped and beat his wife for two years.

Things are absolutely fucked right now.

But I can’t shake the fear that if I’m not careful, I’ll ruin Tia. I showed her, last night, who I will be if I need to be. Tonight, I have to show her how much she means to me, so that she’ll know that even if I gotta wear that black hat sometimes, she’s got me. The me that loves her more than anything.

I soaped up her hair and then her body, taking my sweet time, stoking a fire with my touch. She looked like she was enjoying it. I got myself soaped up quickly and then rinsed and pulled the plug and carried her to bed. The lights were out but the hall light was on, our door opened, and our curtains were wide open with light coming in from the outside lights, so I could make her out easily in the dark.

I ran my hand from her ankle to her hip, taking in her soft skin. Her hips were becoming slightly more rounded. Her belly wasn’t showing like she was pregnant but it wasn’t concave any longer. She was curvier. Her tits were fuller, more beautiful. Even in the dark I could see that her eyes were shining, looking at me with love, with trust. That I hadn’t lost that look with what’d happened last night meant a fuckuva lot.

She wound her wet hair up and flicked it back over the top of the pillow her head was on. I put my mouth to her left nipple and sucked, making her back arch.

She grabbed the headboard with both hands. I lightly ran my hands from her wrists down to her armpits and then my hands found her hips. I lavishly licked between her thighs, twirling my tongue around her clit. Her legs wrapped around my back. My touch went from light to greedy. I yanked her legs up over my shoulders.

“Love you, baby girl.”

“Love you so much, Tommy.”

I hungrily went after her pussy with my mouth. She felt like heaven, wrapped tight around my tongue, legs draped over my shoulders like this.

“Don’t ever doubt how much you mean to me,” I told her, and then moved up her body. She had been just about to come when I said that. She took a steadying breath and gripped the rails over the bed harder.

I positioned my cock, ready to slide in, “Yeah?”

“Mm. Give it to me, yeah.”

I pushed inside, my head rolling back, feeling how wet and tight she was. Her body was out in goosebumps. I ran my hands up and down her torso, grabbing her tits. She attacked my mouth with hers, letting go of the bed rails to grab my head with both hands.

“You’re mine,” I said, fiercely.

She nodded enthusiastically, a gasp escaping her lips.

“Tell me.”

“Yours,” she breathed and put her hand between us to rub her own clit.

I pushed her hand away. That was my job.

“You wanna come?”

“Yeah.”

I pinned her arms with both hands. She grunted and squeezed my cock with her pussy.

I reared back and rammed deep, rotating my hips, fucking her hard.

“Tommy, please.” She tried to wrestle her arms free.

“Who’s in charge?” I asked.

She blew out a breath. “You. Please. I need to come.”

“You come when I let you come.”

“Hurry! You’re torturing me. I need you.”

I couldn’t deny her. I put my hand to her clit and fucked her hard.

“Come with me, baby,” she pleaded while I kept playing with it until she came, hard, calling out my name.

I came inside her, then, emotion fucking pouring out of my soul at the idea that I might not’ve had this… had something worse happened the night before, had I not been able to save her.

I collapsed onto her, shutting my eyes tight to try to push away the flood of thoughts about Johnny, lying in a hospital bed, wondering how he could possibly survive without the woman he loved, how he’d face his children. He’d probably blame himself for getting involved in the Fete project; he’d wish he’d put out a hit on Leo Fucking Denarda months back when the bullshit had started.

Then my mind flashed to that waiter with his gun to Tia’s head, his arm hooked around her throat.

I rolled to my side, pulled her tighter against me, locking her against my body, burying my face in her hair, which smelled like it was supposed to. It took a while to fall asleep but when I did, I did it grateful to have her in my arms and vowing no one would ever fucking touch her again. I didn’t know how I’d manage that but fuck, I’d die trying to keep her safe.

Two hours later I had to go beat on my heavy bag because nightmares of Tia under a pile of rubble, her beautiful face crushed, that hair covered in blood, woke me up.

Dare left me alone. I don’t know how long he was gone but I needed to do something. I needed the beach. Our spot. It would help me feel like me again, maybe. If it didn’t work, I’d have to fake an illness or something to get out of being seen by the Kruna leadership team for the rest of the day. I was undone.

The beach. It’d help.

I picked my clothing up off the floor and put it back on, and then I brushed my hair and checked the mirror. I didn’t look like me. I looked like her. Felicia. The slave who just beat someone bloody with a dragon’s tail whip.

I turned away from myself in disgust, walked out of the bathroom, and slipped on my flipflops. I felt for my collar to count my three strands. And then I walked out of the room and down the hall. I saw Truly coming out of a room a few doors down. She was wearing a double-strand collar and an emerald green merry widow corset with black thigh-highs and metallic green stilettos.

“Felicia,” she greeted, a little smile on her mouth.

“Truly,” I said.

She slowed.

“Walk with you?” she asked.

I was a little surprised.

“I heard what happened with Cleo,” she whispered, “Bravo.”

I slow-blinked.

“I need to warn you about something,” she said very low, her hand covering her mouth.

“What’s that?” I asked.

“Are you allowed to come to the slave garden? There’s a corner where we can talk that won’t be picked up by cameras. It’s very important.”

“Um…”

She was still talking behind her hand, scratching her cheek to try to guard that her lips were moving.

“I have about three hours free before I have to get ready for tonight’s party. If there’s any way you can get to me, please do. Your current situation depends on it.” She slipped away down a hall.

I walked out the door and toward the beach, holding my collar the entire time, feeling the strands, feeling that there were three of them.

I didn’t go far. I was easily visible from the patio. I sat in the sand right at the lapping water and stared at the water, thinking about what I’d done, thinking about who I used to be, and wondering who I was now.

I scooped up water and splashed my face. I fell forward on my knees and scooped more water into my hair. And then more. My hair started to go wavy. I sat down and played with a lock of the length of my now curling hair.

“What the fuck?” Dare’s voice broke me out of a daze.

I let go of my hair and glanced up at him.

“I’ve been looking for you. I was ready to tear this fucking place apart!”

He was mad at me.

I blinked at him. My mouth opened. Anger radiated from every one of Dare’s pores.

I lifted my hand and panned it out in front of me, gesturing at the beach, the water. I grabbed my collar and mouthed, “Three.”

It must have satisfied him, been self-explanatory that I had to come to the one spot here that made me feel something other than dread and felt like I could because I was convinced I had my three-strand collar on, because he took in our surroundings and the anger drained out of his face. He went to his knees in the sand and thrust his fingers into his hair.

“I was fuckin’ worried sick.”

“I’m sorry, Master,” I said softly.

He pulled me against him.

I buried my face into his throat. I held him tight. Tears threatened. I pushed them away.

“I don’t wanna be Felicia again.”

He pulled back to look at me. He looked torn up. Remorseful.

”I know. I’m sorry. I didn’t want this. I fucked up.”

“Tell me to be your good girl,” I pleaded. “I’ll be your good girl for the rest of the trip and then maybe I won’t have to be her anymore after this.”

“I won’t call you that name again. I love you, baby. Fuck, that scared me. You scared me. You okay?”

He brushed my hair away from my face.

I nodded.

“They’re watching. They saw me strut this way, pissed.”

He had me plastered to him on our knees but he hauled off and slapped my ass really hard. I jolted. He slapped it again and then let me go and aggressively pointed at the sand.

He laid down and pointed at his stomach.

“Lay on my belly so we can talk,” he demanded.

I did.

“I’m turned on,” I whispered into his stomach, kissing it.

“That’s good,” he said, but he clearly wasn’t in the mood for beach sex. “I fucked up, baby. I tried to give you what I thought I’d want. I was wrong. I’m sorry.”

“Shh.” I shook my head and gestured toward the spot between my boobs. I was wired. “We’ll talk about that later. I have to get to the slave garden. Can I go see Truly for a few minutes alone?”

“What?”

“There’s a Zen garden, a courtyard at the slave quarters and Truly ran into me in the hall and says she has to warn me about something. Says there’s a private spot in the garden.”

“Truly?”

“One of the girls. Redhead from the Townsend room the other night.”

“What could it be?”

“No idea.”

“You trust her?’

“I… I don’t know. She and I were never close. She’s close with a few girls, I heard she was really tight with Lisa back in the day, but Cleo didn’t let anyone be my friend. You know…”

“I get it. But you gonna be okay?”

I nodded. “I don’t think I have anything to worry about with her. Unless she’s overheard somehow.”

“I just had a meeting with some partners. We’ve got the cocktail party in a half an hour where I’ll meet some others. Am I gonna have you with me? They didn’t say.”

“It’s up to you.”

“I’ll go alone. You go there then and see what she says.”

“Okay.”

“You really okay?”

“No,” I told him, “But some time alone and this beach helped. Truly got me thinking, too. And what we, you and me are here doing? If that works out, that’ll help, too. A lot.”

He sat up and pulled me to straddle him. We made out for a little while.

I wasn’t over what’d happened in that punishment room, a room where I’d been punished in my first few months here. But I had to count my blessings. I had Dare. This place wasn’t my home. I had a home, friends, family, and hopefully once this was over, we’d have helped that task force in their efforts to take Kruna down.

Back in our room, Dare texted Lisa.

Can Angel trust Truly?

Lisa had replied instantly.

Absolutely. Yes. 200%

The slave quarters were just the same, a connected maze of several dorm rooms that housed two hundred slaves, twenty per room. It was weird. I’d only been gone a couple months so of course nothing was really different. I was the one who was different.

There was a girl sitting on the mat that used to be mine and I was right. She was Mr. Delgado’s slave the night before and so she’d obviously replaced me.

My eyes landed on her and the way she looked at me? She knew. She knew who I was and she knew she was on what used to be my bed. She seemed like she thought of me as a quasi-celebrity, the way I’d thought of Monalisa.

This dorm room had thin mats with thin blankets and a tiny pillow. These mats were placed around the perimeter of the room. Truly didn’t sleep here. If I recalled correctly, she was one room over, which would be closer to the garden. I walked past her bed, which she was sitting on while reading a book.

I went to the garden door, ignoring the others, some of whom had eyes on me or who were whispering.

I heard someone clapping low. I glanced behind me. Eyes were on me, but the clapping stopped. I saw teeth. Smiles?

I walked out, hearing a few more claps. It wasn’t enough to draw attention, hopefully, but I was getting a little bit of a round of applause. Word traveled fast around here and people were happy to hear about what I’d done to Cleo. I wasn’t sure how to feel about that.

If I put myself in their shoes and found out that a former Kruna asset, now married, came back and whipped and broke Cleo for being so awful to her? Yeah, I guess I’d want to clap in applause, too.

It wasn’t easy to be in my skin at that moment or feeling the guilt, like I was as bad as Cleo, after the fact. But this? This little bit of validation was kind of helpful. I straightened my back and went outside.

Truly strolled past me quickly and sat at the corner of a koi fountain by the wall. I sat down beside her, but not too close. I looked into the water.

“This corner, the water, the camera angles? This is one of the few places safe to talk. But not for too long.”

“Oh.” I kept my eyes on the water.

“Every slave that leaves to be owned gets a room named after them. When they come back, they’re brought to the room. Their reaction can have consequences. Your former family name was Macleod, wasn’t it? Your father’s name David?”

My eyes moved to her face.

“I saw the plaque go up two days ago. They may make up a backstory. It may contain some truth. Be prepared for either.”

I swallowed hard.

“I’ve been here ten years. I’ve seen a lot. I’ve seen one of those plaques go up a dozen times. Not every master brings his slave back, but if he does, the slave is taken into a room with her former name. If she reacts poorly, her master finds out that she’s holding onto her old life. I’ve seen masters punish or reject slaves for their reaction. Three were left for re-training after that. Only one of those three was taken back by her master. I would hate to see that happen to you. It seems like you got a good one. I hope.”

She moistened her lips and then continued. “I wanted to warn you, so you can steel your emotions, if you still have those old emotions. I’m guessing you do, judging by your eyes when you came back here.”

I was in shock.

“Cleo deserved what she got. You deserve this warning. You didn’t deserve to be treated like a pariah while you were here and we didn’t want to do that to you but I’m sure you understand that we only did what we had to do.”

I nodded. “I did understand.”

“This is my thank you for paying her back just a tiny bit of what she is owed. One of the patrons, Mr. Jackson, he really likes me and he’s due here next month. He likes to watch punishment porn while he fucks. Maybe I can request he play that one so that I can see it. And maybe, if there is a God, one day she’ll get paid a little bit more of what she’s owed.”

I moistened my lips. “Thank you, Truly. Truly.” I smiled a little.

I wanted to tell her. I wanted to tell her so badly that Dare was going to try to take Kruna down. I couldn’t.

She didn’t respond.

“I won’t forget this.”

She smiled and shrugged.

“It could’ve been you that went with him, you know?” I said. “He asked for a redhead. You’re on the shortlist.”

“I know,” she smiled sadly. “He’s a good one?”

I nodded. “So good.”

“You deserve that.”

“You do, too.”

She shrugged. “Someday my prince may come.”

“I hope so.”

She got up. “Hope ain’t worth much in here. You know that. Hard not to hope, though, seein’ what you got. Is it true that you’re in the same family as Monalisa?”

“Yes.”

“She is the shit .” She smiled fondly. “Tell her hi from me and Lulu.”

“She is. I’ll tell her.”

“She never had to see her plaque.” She got to her feet and wandered down to another part of the pond and looked in. “And she never had to come back after her master died. We’re all happy for her. Can’t sit here too long. We’ll draw attention. If we don’t get to talk again, good luck out there.”

“We’ll talk again,” I promised. And that was all I could say but I tried to tell her more with my eyes. She smiled a resigned, sad smile.

I got up and casually wandered the other rooms and then left the slave quarters, smiling at every face that glanced my way.

I felt for these girls and the couple of men here. I really did. And I prayed that God would help my Master get them freedom.

I thanked God that Truly gave me that warning. Even if Dare didn’t plan to leave me behind or punish me at how I reacted to seeing my old name on a plaque; it might’ve complicated matters. I felt like I was already failing at my X to Y plan. I couldn’t fail: I represented my Master and failure would put him and all the plans to get these girls free at risk.

I typed a very quick note on Dare’s phone, which was in our room, telling him there would be a room named after me and to hide reactions from them, that they’d be measuring my reaction to see if I was being obedient.

When he came back after cocktail hour, to fetch me for dinner, he first took a shower and then used his phone to call his office to check in. I knew by his face that he’d read the message. We’d discussed on the beach that I’d leave a note there to tell him if there was something valuable in my secret discussion with Truly.

He kissed me, not saying anything about it, and then we got changed and headed to one of the larger private dining rooms, where a meal for all present partners was held.

Mr. Chen gave a speech at the start of the dinner, where about twenty people were present, slaves included, stating that all but two partners were present, this year, which was a record year for attendance. He talked about how the event was mostly to celebrate together, and to talk to partners about what the leadership team could do to make the club the best it could be.

He said that through discussions in an earlier meeting, they would be ramping up membership in the coming year, adding another hundred members, which would mean that they would want to recruit more Kruna assets. My stomach churned.

Many other wives and owned slaves were here with their masters. I recognized a few but not all.

A few on-site Kruna slaves were at the feet of partners. A few sat in chairs with double-strand collars. I saw a few women on their knees in triple-strand collars, which meant they were owned and still on the floor.

I was lucky. I was extremely lucky. I counted my blessings at that table, my handsome husband beside me. We were dressed up. I had my own plate of food and didn’t have to rely on him to remember to hand-feed me throughout the meal. I was going to be fine. He was going to make sure of it.

Cleo, as a trainer, would never sit here. She ate in a staff room for staff members who were previously slaves. She slept in a dorm room slightly better than the slave quarters but she didn’t sleep in a VIP room, in a bed next to a man who loved her, who held her tenderly, who did his best to give her what she needed and who, when he screwed up, felt bad, admitted his mistakes, and tried to fix things. She didn’t get to leave to go home after the partner summit, back to a regular place with regular people. And shopping malls. And Starbucks. And feeding ducks. To people who loved her.

It was definitely better to be me.

This day, this week. I wanted it fucking over. I’d gotten information during the meetings where Angel wasn’t with me with her wire, that I’d texted off to the number Zack had given me for the task force. Names, arrival times, possible departure dates, other little tidbits of info from the meetings about the financials. Anything that sounded like it might be valuable. The annual residuals partners were getting from this place? Insane amounts of money. I could not believe the money that was being deposited in a Cayman Islands account for Tommy and me. When this shit was over, if we managed to get things clear, that money would go to help the victims of this fucking place.

I’d gotten through the rest of the day partly because of the fact that she’d seemed okay at the beach. Okay might be an overstatement, but she’d looked herself, looked so much better than when I’d left her in bed after that punishment room.

I’d come to our room and found it empty and had nearly lost my shit, no matter who saw it. All sorts of scenarios ran through my head about whether they found the wires, whether Cleo was enacting revenge, whether they knew we weren’t on side and had taken her away from me.

I’d gone to the dining rooms, the main entrance, and had just stepped outside when I’d seen her. I’d managed to find her before anyone found out I was frantically looking, but people had been on that patio, seeing me storm out toward her, so I’d had to make it look somewhat like I’d been reprimanding her for something.

She needed our beach. It was good that she’d sought that out to find her center. It was a good sign that just a few hours after that horrific meltdown that she was looking like my girl. Her eyes were expressive, her emotions clear, but despite the sadness, I could see she was my girl.

I didn’t like that I couldn’t be at her back when she’d gone into the slave quarters, but she needed to do it alone. I didn’t know if it was like stepping into a viper’s den, a place where people who might be jealous of her would be.

Was she being lured for something nefarious? Given that she’d beaten Cleo to a pulp, I had hopes that they just wanted to thank her, to talk to her about her life, maybe. I was glad to get that response from Lisa and then her quick note that the other girl had warned her about some Kruna test we’d be facing.

And it was good that she’d told me just what that was. I had a good poker face and growing up in the Ferrano household, tests were part of the normal, but you could never be too careful when it came to a game like this where your life could easily be at stake.

After the cocktail hour, then dinner, I was invited by Delgado, Chen, Lucas, and another partner named Bart Shaw, who was an investment banking billionaire, for drinks.

They didn’t tell me where so there was no point in looking to my wife for a ‘tell’ about whether the room was a safe sex-free zone or not. This might be their test for Angel.

They had slaves in tow. None of them was a redhead so I guessed the girl who tipped Angel off wasn’t in attendance. We walked down a long hallway on the second floor in an area of the place I hadn’t spent much time in.

“Girls, wait here,” Chen said and then we turned down another hall, leaving them behind.

We stopped in front of a set of double doors. Everyone moved so that Angel and I were in front of a door with a black-taped plaque that overlapped both doors, split in the middle.

There was a beat of silence.

“We’re breaking in a new room tonight, folks. Dario, may I ask your wife a question?” That was Delgado.

“A question?” I asked.

Gan Chen spoke up. “It’s something you won’t disapprove of. I assure you.”

“Go ahead,” I said, but giving Delgado stink eye.

“Mrs. Ferrano, what do you think of this room’s name?” He pulled tape off the bottom to reveal a golden plaque that read the letters AEM and with the years during which she’d been there in a small font.

“What’s this?” I asked.

The eyes of the partners were on my wife.

She stared blankly at the sign.

“This room honors your wife’s contribution to Kruna. What do you think, Mrs. Ferrano?”

“Thank you, Sir,” Angel said softly.

He peeled the rest of the tape off, revealing in script,

David Macleod, esteemed member. 1990-1993.

Macleod Room

Angel stared blankly at the plaque. I stared blankly at it. I had to hide my thoughts, my reaction. I gave Delgado a quizzical look.

He gave me a smirk. Everyone looked at Angel. She looked at me and gave me a smile.

“Shall we?” Delgado opened the door and we all filed in.

Angel was completely composed. I saw Shaw and Lucas exchange looks. Satisfied looks.

We sat.

“Gentlemen?” I inquired.

Someone came over with a tray of drinks. The room was nice. This wasn’t like the Townsend Room. It was less like a library and more like a western saloon theme. Bronze horse statues. Stuffed deer, bears, birds around the room. There was a long bar and the wait staff were dressed in western themed clothing. Girls came in, dressed like 1800s prostitutes.

If they did this to see if they’d get a reaction from her, they were fucking cruel. Name the room after her, list the duration of her captivity, and make the room remind her of her true home.

Not just that, tell her that her father was a member. I didn’t know if that was bullshit or not but suspected it was and if it was bullshit, it was a good play.

Most people wouldn’t hold it together through that. If she didn’t hold it together, she’d have failed a test she shouldn’t know about, a test to give them an idea of whether or not she’d remembered her training and the threats that would’ve been laid out about keeping her mouth shut and staying obedient.

Two more days of this shit and then I could not wait until these motherfuckers were taken out.

“How did you feel about the plaque, Felicia?” Delgado asked.

“It doesn’t matter,” Angel replied. “That’s not my life. My life is with my husband.”

I looked at him. “Need you to explain this shit.”

“Her previous identity. We sometimes find that presenting our former assets with this information can be telling, can help us determine whether or not their master should have any concerns about them hanging onto their old life.”

“So, you’re telling me that you weren’t already sure that she was committed to this life and you sold her to me?”

“Uh, no.” Bart Shaw leaned forward. “We can assure you. No asset is transferred unless we are sure.”

“Then this little game was pointless?”

“It almost always is,” Gan Chen said, sitting down with us. “But it doesn’t harm anything to check.”

“I disagree,” I said, sipping my drink. “If we’re planning to transfer more assets in the future, this test could leave a buyer thinking we were unsure.”

“I see your point,” Joseph Lucas sat down. “It’s a practice that should be discontinued.”

“How are you, baby?” I asked Angel.

“I’m good, Dare.”

“That didn’t upset you?” I asked, caressing her cheek.

“No,” she shrugged. “I’m here with you. That’s all that matters to me now.”

“What’s AEM?” I asked.

“Her former initials. Has she told you?” Gan Chen asked.

I shook my head. “Told me?”

“Her birth name.”

I shook my head. “She never told me, no.”

“I’ve heard you call her Angel. That name is close to her birthname.”

“Is it?” I asked.

I looked at Angel. “Is it?”

She nodded. “Yes, Master.”

“What was your name before?”

“Angelica, Master.”

I shrugged. “Hm. Wow. Coincidence. Funny right? But she’s my perfect Angel, thanks to my partners here. A toast.” I raised my glass. They followed suit.

“To my perfect Angel. And to a hopefully perfect partnership. Salut.”

They all chimed in their cheers, in unison. I patted my lap and Angel, who was standing beside my chair, sat down. I passed her my glass and she finished the bourbon that was in it.

The lights went low and they started playing.

My angel and me? We simply watched for a little while until we could slip away and go to bed. It didn’t affect me this time. These people were scumbags but they were gonna get their due. Soon, if I had my way.

We didn’t make love. We just held one another, nude, the sheets over our heads, as if that thin Egyptian cotton sheet would shield us from the evil around us.

When I’d asked her name and she gave it instantly, I felt a prickle of fear that she’d have a meltdown. But the looks on their faces told me what I needed to know.

They wanted to know she was 100% obedient to me, that yes, their training stuck, but the key part of their training, the part that mattered the most, was that she would obey her master, whoever that master was. That meant that they’d trained her successfully. My asking her name overwrote what they’d taught about keeping the name secret.

This could be good for her road to healing, too.

“But we can’t wait to have your shower. I’ve already bought like six pairs of footie pajamas in all different colors,” Ruby said. We were on the phone.

I giggled. “Don’t they usually have the shower when the mom-to-be is as big as a house?”

“Yeah, I guess.”

“So, we’ve got months and months to go. I’m not even showing yet. Well… I had to suck in to button up my jeans this morning.”

The girls had been over-the-moon excited when we’d had our sleepover. Initially they thought we were gonna booze it up, but I’d broken the news and they forgot about cocktails and instead we talked baby names.

I had a platter of baby vegetables. We had baby bottle pop lollipops. No one got the hints, so I finally put on a maternity top I’d bought that had a graphic of an oven with a little happy face bun in it and they finally “oh’d” in unison and then we did a girlie group hug with laughing and jumping.

Ruby made me call Rose, who was kind of fake-excited. She tried to sound supportive but I’m sure she thought I was too young, that we’d been married too short of a time. She was still being Rose, still being supportive.

The only one who wasn’t 100% supportive was Mia. Little jabs kind of pissed me off and I let her know and she apologized.

Final straw? The selection of pregnancy-themed movies I put out on the coffee table for them to pick from.

“Where’s Rosemary’s Baby?” Mia asked.

Bethany gasped. “Are you comparing this baby’s father to Satan?”

Mia snickered. That was when I lost it a little.

Okay, I lost it a lot.

We cleared the air. It was good.

I was in the kitchen, talking to Ruby on the phone about how my boobs were spilling out of my bra when I heard the distinct sound of paws hitting the tiles. Marley was running for me. He was so excited to see me that he peed.

“For fuck sakes,” Tommy grumbled, coming in behind him.

“Gotta go, Rubes. Call you back. Sorry.” I ended the call.

“Aw, it’s okay,” I said and reached for a paper towel roll, throwing a bunch of squares on the puddle and scooting Marley out the side door to the yard so he would know that peeing needed to happen outside.

I stood in the doorway. He wanted all over me but I encouraged, “Go pee, Mar.”

“That bullshit can’t happen, Tia,” Tommy growled from behind me.

“He’s just a puppy. He’ll learn.”

Tommy was in a squat, wiping the floor with more paper towel, a bottle of spray cleaner in his hand.

I smiled at the domestic sight.

“You look mighty hot doing domestic chores, my husband.”

He didn’t smile back. His patience was low today.

He threw the paper towel in the trash bin outside and then went back to the kitchen. Me and Marley followed. Tommy was washing his hands.

“Gotta go to the office,” he muttered.

“I was thinkin’ maybe we’d have a little dinner tonight? Tessa, Lisa, Luc? Here?”

I wanted Lisa and Tessa in the same room. I wanted to put them in a place where their breach could be healed. Luc and I had talked on the phone and she was already spending the day with Tess. Sarah had called and Luc went right over. When we talked, Luc said she’d get her here if I wanted to organize that dinner.

“I don’t know what time I’ll be home.”

“Oh. Maybe tonight isn’t the best night then. Maybe when Dario and Angel get home. When’ll that be?”

“Couple days maybe. I’ll check. See ya later.” He kissed me quickly while drying his hands and then he left. I didn’t want to leave it with Tess and Lisa. I decided maybe I should call Lisa and talk to her, tell her what was going on. She knew we were going to Vegas to get Tess back but she didn’t know, yet, about the rape.

Marley ran by me with a nearly full roll of paper towel in his mouth. Tommy must’ve left it on the floor.

I dashed after him.

I stepped outside and got into my car, which Will had swapped out of the garage, since I’d left earlier to get back with the pup in Tia’s Jeep. I leaned over to plug my phone in to charge it when I saw a UPS truck pull in front of the gate.

Normally, my security staff took care of deliveries, but I wasn’t expecting anything here at my house, most shit went to the office, so this gave me pause.

With the state of things lately, I wanted to see what this was myself. I waited in my car while it pulled in. I’d grab whatever it was from Will after he signed for it.

Will stood by the driver’s door talking for a minute. Actually, it was longer than was typical. Will gave the guy his index finger and jogged over to me.

“He says Tia has to sign for it personally. Should I get her, or?”

“Courier trucks shouldn’t even be on this side of the gate, man. No reason.” I slammed my door and walked toward the UPS truck.

My eyes hit the driver and I nearly spit my fuckin’ teeth out in anger. Tia’s ex.

Nick Gordon, that fuckin’ punk, was in that driver’s seat, looking like he was about to shit himself at the sight of me.

The little shit who nosed around when we were in Costa Rica and who tried to get her to leave me? The beating I laid on him clearly hadn’t been enough. This punk was like a bad smell.

I picked up my pace, storming toward him. He tried to pull the door shut but I got there first.

“Shut the fuckin’ gate, Will. Now.” Will dashed toward the gate as the UPS truck started to reverse.

I was on the step that led to the driver’s seat, holding onto the door. I thrust the sliding milk truck style door back open and I jumped in and grabbed the stupid fucker, my fist connecting with his mouth. I turned the thing off. Fuckin’ little shit backed into my gate and dented it.

I was cleaning up torn paper towel with the vacuum cleaner. I’d gotten it away from Marley pretty quickly but not before he’d sat down and attempted to make a chew toy of it.

I saw motion from the corner of my eye so turned and saw Tommy dragging someone in a brown shirt in by their brown collar.

A UPS delivery guy?

Nick?

Holy shit.

I turned the vacuum cleaner off.

“Oh my God. What the heck?” I asked.

“You tell me!” Tommy demanded, his eyes on fire.

Nick struggled, holding an envelope in his hand, “I already said; it’s a delivery. From her dad.”

He was trying to struggle away from Tommy, but he didn’t have the strength. Tommy was bigger, stronger, crazier, and angrier.

“Fuckin’ punk,” Tommy spat, and dragged him into his office. “Tia, now.”

I followed.

Tommy threw Nick against the wall in his office. “You little fuckin’ punk. What the fuck? You have the nerve to step foot on my property? To get to Tia? What did you think you were gonna do?” Tommy folded his arms across his chest and leveled a killer dirty look on Nick.

“I just have a letter for her, from her dad. It’s my job, man.” He held the envelope out.

Tommy snatched it from his hand and threw it in the direction of the desk. It landed on the floor. Nick was slumped against the wall. He reached to his utility belt for the signature thingamajig. As if one of us was gonna stop right now and sign for the envelope.

Nick looked up at me. His lip was bleeding.

“Did you hit him, Tommy?”

“Did I?” Tommy looked incensed and glared at me like I was stupid. “You keepin’ shit from me, Tia?”

I did a double take. “Huh?”

He stormed toward me. “How many other packages has this little fuck delivered?”

“Wh-what?” I was shocked at the accusation in his words, his tone, his eyes.

His eyes were scary. I backed up and my back hit the wall.

He eyed me warily and then spun and picked Nick up off the floor by clenching his shirt at his chest and threw him against the wall again. And then he punched Nick in the face.

I screeched.

Marley started barking.

“Get him outta here!” Tommy hollered.

I grabbed my puppy’s collar, pulled him out of the room, and shut the door behind him.

Marley kept barking from the other side of the door.

Tommy kept punching. He was punching Nick like he was a heavy bag. Over and over and over.

“Tommy! Stop it!”

He ignored me.

“What the fuck, man? How many times you been here?”

“This is the s-second time.”

Tommy glared at me, lip curled, like I was a piece of dirt.

I jolted back, my blood running cold.

“She didn’t see me,” Nick said quickly, swaying like he was dazed. “I was just casing the place. Figuring shit out. I delivered something. Your guard signed for it and I left.”

“You didn’t get the message last time, you stupid little shit?” Tommy pulled a gun from his back and put it against Nick’s cheek.

“Talk,” he said.

I fell to my knees on the floor. “Tommy!”

“Shut it, Athena.” He glared at me and then looked back to Nick.

“I got this route so that I could make sure she’s okay. Her father asked me to deliver a letter. He mailed it to me and I re-packaged it. I was just gonna try to talk to her when I delivered it.”

Oh God, Nick.

Tommy let go of him and got the letter from the floor and tore the envelope open. His eyes skimmed it and tossed it on the desk.

I got up. “Tommy, let him go.”

“I’m sick of his shit, Athena.”

“Nick, you have to stop,” I pleaded.

Nick wiped his lip. “Look at this guy, Tia. Look at what you married! You okay with this? The stuff you used to feed me about being an upstanding citizen? Volunteering, making a difference in the world, and this is who you marry? Someone who pulls a gun on me for tryin’ to just talk to you? Ruby told me you’re carrying his baby, Tia? Seriously?” Nick scrunched his face up in disgust.

“Shut your mouth,” I demanded. “That’s my husband and the father of my child you’re talking shit about. Get the fuck outta here and don’t come back!”

“Nice try, Tia. He’s not walking outta here,” Tommy said, emotionless.

Nick and I both gawked at Tommy. Tommy who was standing there with a gun in his hand.

“Let him go, Tommy. He’s not coming back. Right Nick?”

Nick shook his head, his eyes on Tommy’s gun.

Tommy cocked the gun.

I gasped and threw myself at Tommy. “Let him go. Don’t do this.”

He glared at me. “I’m sick and fuckin’ tired of people trying to fuckin’ take you from me, Athena.”

“Nick can’t take me from you, baby.”

Tommy lifted me up and sat me on the edge of his desk and moved back toward Nick, who was sheet white.

“Let him go!” I shouted, desperately. “He won’t come back.”

Tommy moved toward Nick and put the gun in Nick’s mouth. I gasped. Nick’s eyes couldn’t have been any wider.

“Tommy, no. No, no-no-no.” I put my hands in my hair.

Tommy glared at Nick, a muscle jumping in his jaw.

Nick was crying. And peeing his pants. I saw the wet spot spread on the front of his uniform.

I sobbed. I had to stop this insanity.

“Tommy!” I screamed. “Please.”

I was bawling. I jumped off the desk.

“Get the fuck back up there!” he demanded, his chest was moving up and down rapidly. He was so close to snapping.

I sat back on the desk and thrust my hands through my hair, sending Tommy a pleading look, tears running down my face.

I put my hand on my belly and looked at my hand, my wedding rings; the gravity of this was cutting like a knife. A serrated knife.

Tommy side-eyed me and then his expression changed. He pulled the gun back.

“Last chance, fucker. I see you again?”

“You won’t,” Nick promised. Nick’s face was bleeding.

Tommy stepped back again and with his gun, he waved toward the door. “Leave town. You got twenty-four hours. Don’t come back. Before you go, get word to Greg O’Connor that due to that little stunt, he no longer has my protection.” Tommy gestured toward the letter.

Nick looked confused a second and then nodded and left, not looking my way.

I stopped crying. Tears were drying on my face, but my whole body still shook.

Tommy put the gun down on his desk and followed Nick out. Marley was barking, sitting outside the door, showing his tiny puppy teeth to Nick.

I moved to the doorway and then after hearing the front door click shut, to the foyer. Tommy talked to Will outside. He was pointing at Nick and giving Will shit.

Will went and opened the gate, which the UPS truck was directly against. Another car was outside the gate, a guy I recognized as one of our security guys standing on the other side.

Nick reversed the UPS truck out of the driveway and peeled off.

I picked up my puppy.

“It’s okay, Marley.”

He licked a tear off my chin and his tail thumped against me.

Tommy came back inside once the gate was shut.

His face was still like thunder.

I stared at him.

Marley started growling.

Tommy frowned at the dog. Marley was growling at him.

He went into his office and picked his gun up. I went upstairs with my puppy.

Tommy was there, a couple minutes later, standing over the bed, where I sat, holding Marley, who was squirming to get away. I let him go but instead of jumping off the bed, my dog sat on the bed, between me and Tommy, staring at Tommy.

Tommy sat on the edge of the bed.

He patted Marley’s head, and said, “Good boy.”

Marley tilted his head curiously at his master. At any other time, I’d have laughed. My little baby dog was smart. He was trying to figure all this out.

I looked my husband right in the eye.

His chest was still heaving. Still pissed.

He was staring at me. I was staring back.

“He never contacted you? Not since that dinner?”

I shook my head.

He narrowed his eyes.

“You don’t believe me?” I accused.

“Didn’t say that.”

“You better not fucking say that!” I yelled.

He gave his head a shake and blew out a breath. He put his palms over his eyes and rubbed.

“I gotta go hit something.”

“You do that,” I snapped.

His hands dropped and he stared at me a minute.

I rolled the other way and got to my feet on the other side of the bed.

I stormed to the bathroom and slammed the door. I washed my face and drank a glass of tap water.

I looked at my reflection.

I shook my head.

I felt the tears threaten but I didn’t let them come. I opened the door. He was standing there, looking down at me. I couldn’t read his expression. My dog was in his doggie bed, chewing on his big red Kong toy.

I tried to walk around him but he stopped me with his hands on my shoulders.

“Get off,” I pushed his chest with both hands. “Don’t fucking touch me.”

His eyebrows rose in challenge.

I glared.

He backed off and looked at the floor.

“Fuck you, Tommy. Just…fuck you.”

I stormed out.

He caught me in the hallway and I was up in his arms.

“Put me down!”

He put me down on the bed and pinned me, his eyes on mine. Remorse in them. Maybe. I didn’t know. I didn’t really care. I needed space.

“Don’t be like this. I need you.”

“I need to not be afraid that you’ll keep killing people.”

“Tia.”

“You’ve gone dark.”

My heart hurt.

It hurt so much.

He blew out a resigned breath. “I’ve always been dark, baby girl.”

“No. You used to be dark sometimes but now? It’s like you’re always dark now.”

I looked away from her accusing gaze, from her beautiful, wet eyes. She was probably right.

“That little fuck was a headache I didn’t need today, after all the shit we’ve been dealing with.”

“You didn’t have to put a gun in his mouth. Beat him up!”

“Anyone tries to get between you and me, behind my back? They will get a gun in their mouth. They will get their face beaten. He comes around you again, he’s not just getting it in his mouth. He gets dead. Capiche?”

She turned her face away and wouldn’t look at me.

“No crying or pleading will work on me next time, Athena. I mean it.”

She still wouldn’t look at me.

I grabbed her chin and looked her in the eye. She looked back. She was looking at me with what looked a whole lot like hate.

I let go of her, feeling like her expression was a slap. She got up and curled her lip at me. She looked like she wanted to slap me, like she was weighing out the pros and cons of doing that. I leaned forward, glaring back at her. I was pissed and I wasn’t hiding it.

She chickened out. Her eyes dropped to the bed.

Smart girl.

I left her there, went outside to talk to Will and the other security guy who Will was switching out with. I reminded them of all the rules and told them not to let her leave the house, which they already knew was a rule.

She still didn’t have free reign to come and go without security, never had. I hadn’t felt like it was safe enough, but I needed confirmation that they knew no one could approach her and she couldn’t leave. It was also stupid to let a truck in here. By the time I finished reading them the riot act, I was sure it penetrated.

Her eyes, her anger? I didn’t know if she was pissed enough to try to test me by taking off. I wasn’t taking a chance.

She was right about me being in what felt like a perpetual state of dark. I was dark enough right now that she did not want to test out my tolerance for that shit. I was gonna make it so she didn’t have that opportunity to push.

I called Nino and told him to make sure Nick Gordon left town no more than twenty-four hours from now, to find out where he was going and to make sure that he knew that he’d have eyes on him and if he came back, he’d be sorry. I wanted double security on my house again.

I also called a lawyer friend of our family who was helping me with Greg O’Connor.

“Hello!”

“Hey, Frankie?”

“Hey, Tommy. What’s up?

“Don’t take my protection away but get a message to O’Connor that he just lost my protection,” I told him. “I want him to squirm.”

Greg O’Connor’s letter to Tia said that he wanted to see her. That it was very important and not to tell me about it.

I’d had Tino visit him after we got back from Costa Rica and he told him that he needed to leave her be, otherwise lose my protection. If he wanted to speak to her, he’d go through me and I’d approach her to see if she wanted to see him.

His going behind my back with that little punk? He should get shanked in gen pop. He should be scared. I wasn’t pulling the plug on protection yet but he would lose some sleep, for sure. I didn’t know what I’d do about him long-term. He still has to stand trial for all his crimes with the law. After that, he had to stand trial with my wife for his crimes against her. I’d see what she wanted done about him later. I headed to the Ferrano Enterprises office.

Tommy came home late. I was in bed, the lights out. He probably thought I was asleep, but he still took me into his arms and held me close. I considered pulling away, but I was all out of fight for the day. So, I didn’t.

Because I didn’t, he started to kiss my neck, my shoulders, feel up my boobs. And then his hand was in my panties. I was wearing one of his shirts, but not one he’d worn recently.

I’d done laundry and cleaning all day, taking my anger out on my house. At least it was productive. He liked me in his shirts. I liked being in his shirts. So, I had on a black dress shirt, half-buttoned.

I arched into his touch, feeling myself get wet, feeling my nipples wake up. His circling motion went deeper. He nibbled on my earlobe.

“Mad?” he asked.

“Yes,” I said, but it came out breathy.

“Wanna take it out on me?” he invited.

I twirled around and straddled him. “That’d be another yes.”

He whipped the shirt over my head and sat up, me still on him, my knees on either side of his hips, then his hands both went to my crotch and he purposely ripped my underwear straight off. I heard the fabric protest before it was shredded. He pushed his hardness into me. I attacked his mouth with mine. I yanked at his hair and then attacked his throat and started to suck, hard, giving him a hickey.

He let me do that for a moment and then he flipped me to my back and had my hands pinned. He was trying to tie my ripped underwear around my wrists and secure my wrists at the rails of our headboard. I fought back and wriggled and squirmed until he let me get away. I rolled off the bed and stood.

He jumped to his feet. He was naked. His cock was at attention. For a second, he looked like he was gearing up for a fight. But then I licked my lips and threw myself at him.

He caught me, lifted me up and kissed me.

“Put me down.” I had a change of heart.

He set me back on my feet.

“Play,” I demanded. I needed a game.

“Stakes?” he asked.

“Chase. Winner take all.” That meant he chased me, caught me, and forced me to submit.

“You got to the count of one. One.” He grabbed me and picked me up by catching my bottom. He lifted me, stepped to the side and put my back to the wall, wrapping my legs around his waist.

“No, let go. Give me to five.”

“New game.”

“What? No. I want that one.”

“New game.”

“What new game?” I whined.

“Resistance. Then edging. I don’t let you come until you beg. Then I stop right before you come and work you up again.”

“What if I won’t beg.”

“Wanna bet I can’t make you beg? I’ll keep at you.”

“How is this fair?”

“We both win. You get to come when I let you.”

“What do you get?”

“Power.”

“Hm.” I paused. “Put me down a sec. Gotta pee.”

He set me on my feet.

“I fibbed. Chase me first.” I dashed out of the bedroom and zoomed down the hall.

He came after me. “You just forfeited your chance to negotiate, baby girl. Now I get to make all the rules.”

I ran down the stairs and into the kitchen.

I was on one side of the center island. He was on the other. He walked, casually, rounding it.

I ran back toward the stairs.

The chase was something I kind of needed. Weirdly. It was probably something psychological about submitting to let go of my stress but fighting for my independence first. I didn’t know, exactly, but I craved the chase sometimes. It was so raw and visceral for me.

I was four or five steps up when I lost my footing and tripped.

He caught me before I landed.

My heart tripped, too.

“Fuck, Tia. What the fuck?” He scooped me tighter to him and stormed the rest of the way up, into the bed and sat, planting me on his lap.

My eyes were wide. My heart went splat.

“No more fucking chasing! You wanna fall down the goddamn stairs while you’re pregnant? Fuck!”

He was mad.

I was horrified.

I could’ve hurt our baby. I could’ve killed our baby with my stupidity.

I started to bawl. I put my hands to my belly.

His anger melted away. I felt it evaporate.

“I’m so sorry,” I cried, saying it not to him, but to our yet-to-be-born, yet-to-even-show baby.

“Oh God.” I sniffled.

He laid down and threw the blankets over us.

“We need to get our fuckin’ act together. The both of us,” he muttered.

I looked at his face. There was a tear on his cheek, too. He pulled me close and kissed me.

“You okay?” he asked.

“No. I’m so s-stupid.”

“I love you,” he whispered hoarsely. “That was stupid but you’re not stupid.”

“I love you. We’ll get it together. Starting now,” I promised him, promised myself.

“How ‘bout some good old-fashioned vanilla for tonight? For until this baby is born?”

“Sounds like a plan,” I said and I smiled through my tears and kissed the tear on his cheek. And then we made slow, sweet, exploratory vanilla love. With a couple sprinkles on top. But no games, no chasing. No denying one another.

The next morning, at the breakfast table, I hesitantly asked, “Can I have the letter?”

“Of course, you can.” He looked at me strangely.

I went to his office and read it. I hadn’t entered his office yesterday after the incident with Nick and it was sitting on his desk. He must’ve picked it back up.

After reading it, I put it in the trash bin beside his desk and went back to the kitchen and popped bread into the toaster.

“You wanna see him?” Tommy asked.

I spun around. “You’d be okay with that?”

“Tia, this is your father. Not mine. It’s up to you.”

I pondered it.

“You want me to find out about visiting days?”

I shook my head. “No. I don’t wanna see him.”

“You sure?” He raised his eyebrows.

“No. I’m not sure. I’m not ready to make a firm decision. Just… just forget it for now.”

He gave me a tight smile and his eyes moved back to his laptop screen.

My phone rang. It was Ruby.

“Hey,” I greeted.

“Hey! Wanna come to the mall with me and Beth?”

The mall. Ah, a simpler time. When I hung out at the mall.

“I can’t today, Ruby. But listen… can you do me a favor and stop talking to Nick about my life? You have no idea the trouble he’s caused.”

“Nick won’t be any trouble any longer,” Tommy muttered, walking by me, grabbing his keys.

“Hang on, Ruby. Let me call you back.” I ended the call.

“What did you do?”

“I told him to leave town. He doesn’t? I already said what’d happen if he doesn’t.”

“You meant that?” I asked.

He raised his eyebrows and didn’t answer. He didn’t have to.

Please Nick, leave town.

Tommy kissed me quick. “Going to the office. Dinner out tonight? Venetia? Movie?”

I nodded. “Okay.”

“Love you. See you at around six.” He kissed me again, slapped my bottom, and he was gone.

We never got to do a dinner and a movie. Turned out, that night, we had to get on a plane and go to Thailand.