Chapter Nine
March
“G ood morning, all!”
Eva cringed at that voice.
Dammit!
She steeled her shoulders and turned to face Vance as he walked toward her where she stood talking with Alex, the project manager. Three months in and the build was coming along nicely after a few initial delays. The framing was finally complete, leaving them with a skeleton of what would become the new Spotted Cow. Max was over to her left checking inventory with the foreman, his back to her.
Humidity made her linen shirt stick to her back as thunder rumbled above them, the perfect backdrop to what was sure to be a fun exchange.
Not .
She hadn’t seen Simon at all this morning. She bit back her disappointment at that. They’d fallen into a safe, friendly rhythm the last couple of months. One that didn’t push either of them out of their comfort zone, but as they got to know one another they were definitely getting closer.
Even she could see that, and she could also see the beginnings of what looked like being a great friendship. But she liked him more and more each time they saw one another and, heck, she wanted more. And that niggling voice in the back of her head kept trying to make her believe that she was the problem, the reason that Simon hadn’t made a move.
Vance opened his arms wide, that slimy grin widening his mouth.
How had she ever fallen for him? He was as different to Simon as night was to day. Put them side by side and he simply didn’t measure up.
“What? No welcome?” His gaze slid around the worksite. “You haven’t been answering my texts, baby.”
Her spine erupted in chills.
“Don’t you dare call me that,” she growled.
How different it could be—Simon calling her babe by accident that day and her ovaries nearly exploding; then… him .
The smile dipped a little. “Come on. We don’t have to pretend. Introduce me to your friend here.” He motioned to Alex.
“No. You don’t belong on the worksite, Vance. Please leave. It’s unprofessional and not safe for you to be here, and you’re not covered under the insurance.”
That part was a lie; but tough, he didn’t know it. And she wanted him gone.
Vance’s smile slipped further. “What, your boyfriend not here today to back you up?”
Max’s terse voice sounded over her shoulder. “Evangeline doesn’t need anyone standing up for her, not even her boyfriend. She asked you to leave. Do it. Before her boyfriend does turn up and removes you physically, like he said he would last time. And I guarantee you, he won’t be gentle.”
“And who might you be to threaten me ?”
Max stepped forward to be level with Eva’s shoulder. “I own all this. And I said leave.”
“We have nothing to say to one another, Vance. Don’t make an even bigger pain of yourself; just go. Please. You’re being unreasonable.”
A nasty snarl darkened his face for a split second, short enough that she wasn’t sure she’d seen it, so fast was it replaced by that fawning smile. “We have a lot left to say, baby . You just need to look past your hurt feelings.”
Max stepped forward, Alex at her other side doing the same thing. Vance held up both hands and walked backward, fast. Lightning, quickly followed by thunder, rolled above them.
“I’m going. But I will show you that I mean it when I say I’m sorry.”
She closed her eyes and gritted her teeth. “This is not the place.”
He held his arms wide again, that slimy smile firmly back in place. “Later then, pumpkin.” He walked until he reached his car, then spun. “By the way, how’s the kid?”
Eva gasped and jerked in place.
Her fists were clenched so tight she was surprised blood wasn’t dripping onto the ground beneath them. She wouldn’t respond to that. She just refused . It was what he wanted, to keep her attention, to keep her emotions high and focused on him, whether good or bad. And the casual disregard for their son…
Vance got into his car and gunned the engine.
“We’re going to have to do something about that guy,” Max said as she faced both the men.
“I’m sorry, Max. I’ll talk to him. It won’t happen again.”
She looked up when Max didn’t respond.
“Don’t apologise. You aren’t responsible for his bad behaviour. I’m sorry I interrupted but, man! Si was right, he makes your blood pressure erupt the instant he starts talking.”
Eva’s brows shot up in surprise. Max grinned at her. “What? He’s my brother. We talk.” His face closed over. “Although, I am glad he’s not here.”
She frowned in confusion. Max’s grin turned crafty.
“If he was, I think he would’ve grabbed that jerk by the scruff of the neck and dragged him to his car.”
Heat exploded up Eva’s cheeks. Simon going all He-Man should’ve been a huge red flag and enough to make her run screaming, but it had the opposite effect. It made her feel ridiculously warm and fuzzy and gooey inside.
Grow up, Adams. Sheesh!
“And I see you wouldn’t have minded in the slightest.”
Eva couldn’t hold his gaze. She shrugged and turned, looking up at the sky as large drops plopped onto her upturned face.
“Okay, people!” Alex spun and clapped loudly. “Pack it up! Storm’s rollin’ in. See you Monday morning!”
The site became a hive of busyness as the crew rushed to pack their things away before the incoming deluge hit.
“I’m going to run, Max. I’ll see you on Monday then?” she said over her shoulder as she moved toward where she’d parked her ute.
Max grinned at her, totally not sidetracked by her deflection.
“Will do. Have a good weekend, Eva.” His grin widened. “I’ll tell Simon you said hi.”
She knew her face reacted; she couldn’t help it. She turned and rushed for her car and jumped inside, slamming the door as the rain began in earnest, thunder rumbling all around.
*
Simon pulled up at the worksite just as the heavens unleashed. The sight of the completed framing made excitement curl through his blood just thinking how far along the rebuild was. He couldn’t wait until the roof was on—which was next—and they could walk around inside it. It was starting to feel real .
He glanced ahead and saw Eva’s tail-lights head off down the road and couldn’t help the pang of disappointment that he’d missed her.
He’d slept in—actually slept in—for the first time in forever.
Shoving his ute’s door open, he bolted for Max’s Jeep as he saw his brother duck inside it; hauled the door open, then slammed it as he fell inside as well.
“Blergh!” he grumbled as he shook the drenched hair out of his eyes and scrubbed his hands over his wet face.
“Really? You had to plonk your wet ass in my car?” Max said as he stared at him.
Simon grinned. “You got leather seats. It’ll survive.”
“You’re late.”
“So?”
Max’s grin disappeared, replaced by anger. “You missed the fun.”
Simon’s stomach churned. That look on Max’s face was never a good omen. “What happened?”
“Eva’s ex happened.”
Simon let out a string of choice words and shook his head. “I hope you set him straight?”
Max nodded. “He also made a smart-ass mention of Eva’s boyfriend . I didn’t disabuse him of the idea.” At Simon’s surprised look, he continued. “It might make him think twice about coming back here to bother her if he thinks you are .”
Simon relaxed back into the leather seat, his hair dripping down the sides of his face. He rubbed the back of his hand over his jaw. “Okay.”
He squirmed a little under Max’s intense stare.
“So.”
Simon didn’t look his brother in the eye, just turned his head a little. “Hmm?”
“Eva.”
That pesky hand was back, rubbing his jaw. Max chuckled. Simon winced. His brother knew it was one of his nervous tics.
“What about her?”
“What’s going on?”
Simon blew out his breath and stared out through the rain-fogged windscreen. “Damned if I know.”
Max waited. The silence ticked on, the pounding of the rain heavy on the roof of Max’s old Jeep. Simon shuffled on the comfy seat. Max knew if he waited long enough that his silence would get the better of Simon and he’d spill.
Well, not this time.
He wouldn’t say a word. There was nothing to say. Nothing was going on. Nothing big. Not yet anyway.
Hell .
There wasn’t, was there?
He didn’t want there to be. She was his friend.
Did he want more?
He sighed heavily. Yeah . Yeah, he did.
And that was the problem.
“Nothing happened,” Simon said in a rush, then grimaced. Why did that damned tactic always work on him, even when he was determined it wouldn’t?
Max still didn’t say a word, leaving him enough rope to tangle himself up in knots with.
It came out in a rush. The trip to Bialga, the nightclub. Meeting Eva.
The hotel room.
He didn’t go into specifics about what happened there, just that they’d gone back there, and she’d left.
“We didn’t have sex,” he clarified.
Max breathed in deep and sank into his seat, the old leather creaking as it settled. “I wouldn’t judge you if you did, Si.”
He shrugged. “Yeah, but we didn’t. That’s not why I was there. In Bialga, I mean. I wasn’t out to get laid.”
“I know that.”
“I didn’t know who she was. We didn’t say our last names.” Simon leant his elbow on the window ledge and rested his forehead in his hand. “What the hell is wrong with me?” he whispered. He closed his eyes. “How can I be attracted to someone so soon after…”
Max’s large hand landed on his shoulder and squeezed. “It’s not like there’s a required grieving period— here, have a life crisis, but you can’t do X before the thirtieth of June . It doesn’t work that way. Only you know how you feel. It’s that simple, and that goddamned complicated.”
Simon shook his head. “I don’t know what to do. I’m so attracted to her that my head spins when she’s around; but then I start thinking about Amy and the guilt sets in. Fuck! The guilt, Max. It nearly drowns me.”
He turned his head to look at his older brother. The one who always made things right, who always had the right answer for whatever his problem was.
“What am I supposed to do?”
Max squeezed his shoulder again then dropped his hand, rubbing at his own face. Simon almost smiled. It was a habit all three of them had picked up from their father.
“That’s not for me to tell you, buddy. Look how I wound myself up in knots over Millie. For years . If I’d gotten off my ass back then, we could’ve been together for ages now, could’ve had a whole gaggle of kids. But we didn’t. And I probably wouldn’t change it. But you? Only you can decide what you’re comfortable with. Only you know what you’re feeling. This attraction to Eva, it might be just that—lust. She’s a pretty woman. Smart. Talented.”
At Simon’s sour look, Max laughed. “It’s true, though.”
He sighed and slumped into the seat back. “It is. She’s so far out of my league…”
Max gasped. “Well, now. That’s what the problem is? You think she’s too good for you?”
Heat flushed Simon’s face. “She is . She’s a freakin’ architect. She won that amazing award—the best in the damned country .” He gestured to himself. “I’m an illiterate lackey. I have nothing to offer someone like her. I’d only embarrass her.”
The thump on his upper arm had him swearing. “Ouch! What was that for?”
Max’s angry face glared at him from the other side of the car. “You are not illiterate. You are not uneducated. And even if you were, you’re a good man, Si. The best. You can’t base your value on a stupid piece of paper.”
He rubbed his arm, frowning. He knew Max was right, and most of the time he was fine with it all, but sometimes… Sometimes it still hit hard, that he felt he wasn’t up to scratch.
“She’s got a kid,” he whispered.
The anger drained from Max’s face. “I know, dude.”
He plucked at his wet jeans. “I met him a couple of months ago. I’ve seen him several times now. The kid? Matty.” He started laughing. “His name is Matthew , for fuck’s sake.”
“Popular name.”
Simon sent his brother a withering glare.
“I know. Bit of a coincidence, eh?”
He rubbed his palm on his jeans. “He’s a nice kid. Real friendly.” He touched his neck, still able to feel tiny ghost arms hanging around it. “That first day we met? He hugged me and showed me his favourite teddy.”
Max’s eyebrows shot up. “He hid from me the couple of times I’ve met him. Wanted nothing to do with me.”
“That’s ’cos you’re ugly,” Simon shot back, a smile tipping the corner of his mouth. Surprise washed through him while he waited for another thump, one that didn’t eventuate. A massive laugh from Max echoed in the Jeep, though.
Max was usually the one that everyone gravitated toward. He was the proverbial big brother figure.
“How…” Max cleared his throat. “Was it difficult?”
Simon shook his head, watching the rain run down the window in thick rivulets. “No. Not how you’re thinking. I was shocked. And maybe a little… I don’t know… scared? Stupid, I know.”
“Not stupid, Si. Not stupid at all.”
Simon shrugged, not sure how to put what he was feeling into words. “It wasn’t bad . Eva looked like she was going to have a heart attack when he jumped on me. I think she thought I’d break, or something.”
He looked at his brother, then. “I don’t want to be that person, Max. I don’t want to be the one everyone treats differently, walks on eggshells around, scared I’ll break if they say or do the wrong thing. That’s not how I feel. Maybe back when it all happened, yeah. But not now. I know I’ve been an ass regarding the kids. And I’m sorry. It’s just… hard.”
Max’s hand was back, gripping the back of his neck this time. That particular version of a bro hug had always had the same effect: a calming of his pulse, a slowing of his heartbeat. It just let him breathe easier, and he had no idea why.
Max knew it and used it when he thought Simon needed help.
Who knew, maybe he did.
“I want to be there. For you. For Darb. For the kids. I-I’ve been seeing a therapist for almost a year now.” He ignored Max’s surprise and pushed on. He needed to get it out while he could. “I am getting better. I love them, dude. I just freeze up when they come close. I promise I’ll try harder.”
Max’s strong fingers massaged his neck, relaxing his tense shoulders. “I know you will. And I know you’ll get there, Si. Heck, it’s only been a bit over a year. No one thinks any worse of you. The kids won’t notice anything’s wrong for ages yet. You have time. You don’t need to rush it. I have faith in you.”
Simon closed his eyes and just breathed through the intense emotion swirling through him like a tsunami. He didn’t deserve the family he had. They were all so caring, so forgiving.
It was time he got out of his own way and got involved in life again. He’d been in a holding pattern for far too long, and now its usefulness had worn out.
Placing his hand on the door handle, he glanced at Max. “Thanks. I’m gonna get outta here. I’ll see you later.”
He didn’t specify when. It wasn’t uncommon to see one of his family members daily, sometimes several of them.
The joys of living in a small town.
He didn’t wait for Max’s reply and jumped out, slamming the car door in his haste to get through the pelting rain.
The Jeep’s engine started with a growl and Simon stumbled over something on the ground. He looked down to see a woman’s purse stuck in the mud.
The pale, lemon yellow rectangle looked familiar.
He bent and grabbed it, then ran for his own ute. He fell inside and sat there, dripping onto his vinyl seats, then flipped the purse open to look for the driver’s license or any other ID.
Eva’s face looked out at him from the clear plastic pocket where her license sat.
Simon busied himself brushing off the crud from the outside of the expensive-looking leather, wiping it on his jeans when his hands didn’t make as much difference as he’d hoped.
Glancing at his watch, he chewed the inside of his cheek for a moment.
Would she think him a creep for going to drop it off? She might need it.
True, most people had their important cards on their phones, but she might be old school, or worried if she couldn’t find it. He didn’t have her phone number, hadn’t asked for it yet simply because he was chicken, and after the emotional purge he’d just dumped on his brother, he wasn’t asking Max for it, either. But her address was right there on her license.
Slipping his key into the ignition, he waited until the engine burst to life and set the vents to clear the building fog on the inside of the windscreen, then eased the gearstick into position.
Eva’s, it was.