Chapter 30
Moira
I’m so
exhausted that I doubt I’ll make it to my room to collapse on
my bed. Yes… my couch would do just fine if I can make the few
steps there. If not, the floor is fine too. I want to do nothing but
sink down into sleep and not return for maybe…oh, say four or
five years.
The cab has just
dropped me off at my house. I heft my backpack up and open my mailbox
to see if there’s anything in there. Kelly had agreed to check
it every few days, and she must have come today because it’s
empty.
My trip to Caraica
was an absolute waste of time. Once I finally got over my sadness and
grief, I realized that Lisa was right. The unknown was killing me,
and I had to make the journey to make sure Zach was safe.
Except I couldn’t
find him. The guide I had hired after my charter flight ended said he
knew exactly where the Caraican village was. We made it in a day and
a half of hard river paddling and hiking, just a total of four and a
half days after I left the States.
When we emerged into
the clearing, I was stunned to see it deserted. My heart was slamming
against my ribs as I looked at the charred remains of the longhouses
and the crops overgrown with weeds.
I had no clue where
the tribe went… or even if they existed. Fear permeated every
cell in my body as I considered the worst possible scenario. That
they had all been slaughtered in a revenge raid.
But that didn’t
make sense either. Only the men would have raided, leaving the women
and some men behind for protection. So where were they?
My guide agreed to
stay the night in the abandoned village while I tried to figure out
my next move. Sadly, I had no options. I clearly couldn’t go
poking around the Amazon, trying to find Zach. It was 2.7 million
square miles in size, and it would take me ten lifetimes to scour it
in search of him.
The next morning I
decided my best course of action was to make my way back to the small
river town where my charter flight had landed and see if I could find
out any information.
After the day and a
half travel back, I stayed another two days on the river talking to
various Indians that came to the hub to trade goods. The only thing I
was able to glean was that there was a rumor the Matica and the
Caraicans had reached a peace pact, and they were not at war. No one
seemed to know where the Caraicans had gone.
With no other
options available, I took a charter flight to Sao Paolo and returned
home to the States. Bitterness was a black scourge upon me because I
had learned nothing new that would ease my heart. Zach was truly lost
to me forever, and there was nothing left for me to do now except to
try to figure out how to pick up the pieces and heal myself from this
pain.
When I reached Sao
Paolo, I immediately called Randall to update him on my failure. As
Lisa said, he happily funded my expedition, as anxious as I was to
hear news of Zach. Like me, he had no expectations that Zach would
return, but he was terribly worried about his welfare and was hoping
at the very least that he and I would be able to share a mutual peace
of mind.
When Randall got on
the line, it was a little difficult to understand him with the
connection I had. “Moira… is that you?”
“Hi Randall,”
I said, trying to put a smile in my voice that I know failed
miserably. “I’m in Sao Paolo now.”
“How are you
doing?” he asked, which I thought was odd. Why wasn’t he
immediately pumping me for information about Zach?
Ultimately, I was
too tired to try to ponder that further, so I told him, “I’m
fine, but I’m sorry, Randall… I couldn’t find
Zach.”
“Oh…
well, okay. You tried and that’s all you can do,” he
said, almost distractedly.
“Are you
okay?” I asked him, because he sounded a bit off.
“Fine, fine,”
he assured me. “Just a little bit… um…
disappointed, I guess. So, when are you coming back?”
“I fly out
tonight and should be in Chicago tomorrow morning,” I tell him,
stifling a yawn. I’m hoping I can crash in one of the terminal
chairs and catch a little nap.
“Okay, my
dear. Well, have a safe flight and we’ll talk when you get
back,” he said.
I hung up from my
call with Randall, utterly confused. Maybe he was just grieving and
couldn’t process what I was telling him. I thought he’d
demand to know everything I did to find Zach, but maybe he’s
just waiting until I get back in deference to me. He has to know my
inability to find him is weighing heavy on my shoulders.
Fishing my keys out
of my pocket, I make the long walk up my sidewalk. Okay, it’s
not so long… maybe only twenty feet, but it’s twenty
feet too long as tired as I am. Lifting my chin in resolve as I put
my key in the lock, I decide that I’m too tired to make it to
my bedroom… but I won’t succumb to the floor. The couch
will be a nice, happy medium.
I turn the knob and
push the door open, letting my pack fall to the floor and immediately
eying the couch. I trudge my way there, not even bothering to take my
shoes off. Resting one knee on a cushion, I fall face-first into the
comfort that is calling me to sleep.
Snuggling into the
softness, I close my eyes and sigh. I immediately start to slip
under, and a dream comes upon me.
“Moira.”
I hear Zach’s voice.
Oh, that sounds
lovely. Rich, full of timber and emotion. I can imagine his beautiful
eyes and his magnificent body. I remember the last time we were
together as he fucked me, then as he held me after and let tears slip
out of his eyes against my skin.
“Moira,”
he says again, and he sounds a bit louder this time. A bit clearer.
My eyes fly open,
and I hear it again. “Moira.”
I scramble up onto
my knees and peer over the back of the couch… into my kitchen,
where I see Zach sitting there at my kitchen table. He’s
wearing a pair of dark-washed jeans and an olive-green T-shirt. His
feet are bare and his hair is wet. Blue eyes burn into me with
intensity.
I rub my own eyes
furiously with my hands and look back again.
Yup… still
there.
Maybe I’m
hallucinating. Maybe I got some type of fever or infection while in
the jungle. Yes, that coupled with lack of food and sleep the last
few days, I’m surely just imagining that Zach is sitting in my
kitchen.
I flop down with
frustration onto my back on the couch and squeeze my eyes shut,
willing myself to fall asleep.
“Come on,
Moira. Stop playing around,” Zach says.
Holy fuck.
He’s really
here.
In my house.
While I’ve
been traipsing around the jungle looking for him.
I come flying off
the couch and round it with a speed that belies the exhaustion I’m
feeling. Zach stares at me, a small smile curving his lips up as he
watches me stride toward him. He stands from the chair and opens his
arms to me, and I fly at him.
My hands reach up
and I slap them to his chest, shoving with all my might. His eyes
flare in surprise and he stumbles backward, the kitchen chair
catching him behind the knees. He falls down into it with a thud.
I lean in and shove
at his chest again, although I don’t budge him an inch this
time.
“You asshole,”
I snarl furiously. “What are you doing here?”
I expect Zach to
give me a sheepish apology for breaking my heart, for leaving me…
for making me worry, and most of all, for causing me to go half a
world away just to make sure he was okay.
Instead, he surges
up out of the chair and clasps my face with his hands. Jerking me to
him, he crushes his mouth to mine, thrusting his tongue into my mouth
and giving me the hottest, wettest, deepest kiss of my life. He
growls low in his throat, and my bones liquefy.
Oh, to feel his
hands on me… his eyes searing me with lust when he pulls away
marginally. He leans in and kisses me again, our teeth knocking
together with brutality. He bites at my lip, sucking it into his
mouth as he pulls my hips inward and grinds his erection against me.
Zach tears his lips
away and reaches down to my T-shirt, whipping it over my head. I open
my mouth to argue with him but he kisses me again, effectively
shutting me up. His hands work at my canvas belt, finally my button
and zipper, and then he’s shoving my pants and my underwear
down to my knees.
“What do you
think—?” I start to say but he kisses me again, his
tongue mating with mine so I’m robbed of any power of speech.
My breathing starts getting harsh as his hands roam over my body,
pinching at my nipples through my bra.
He cups me between
the legs and hisses when he sticks a finger in me, “Wet baby. I
knew you’d be.”
My mind is spinning
and there’s a small part of me that is yelling at me to stop
this assault, but the other ninety-nine point nine percent of my body
is screaming at him to hurry up and just fuck me.
Zach doesn’t
waste any time. His hand goes around to the back of my neck, and he
pushes me down to the kitchen floor. The linoleum is cool against my
knees, and I know it will feel cold against my cheek as I watch the
floor rise to meet me while Zach puts me in the same position that
started all of this between us.
Harsh pants fill the
room… mine, Zach’s… we’re both desperately
on edge. I can hear the scrape of his zipper and then his hands are
at my hips. He places the head of his cock against the back of my
pussy and starts rotating his hips, working his way into my body.
When he gets about an inch or so in, he finally grabs ahold of me
hard and slams his way home.
I cry out, “Oh,
Zach.”
He answers me with a
guttural moan and says, “I’ve missed you so much.”
Those words melt my
heart. Then he melts my body as he starts to thrust in and out of me,
holding me in place by my hips.
“Oh, Moira,”
he pants as he moves with such deliberation… such care. “You
just don’t know. You just don’t know.”
His words are broken
and coarse, his breath practically wheezing from his exertions. I
feel a sudden buildup of pressure between my legs, then an orgasm is
tearing its way free even as my heart starts filling up with joy that