Chapter 28 Anders’s Past #2
“It was me,” my father answers. “That night, he saved my life. His group saved my father, as well as Duck. My father sustained many injuries. He never quite recovered to his normal state, but he and my uncle survived. I lost my mother and grieved her loss, but I still had my family. I will be forever grateful for Anders and his group. We lost our head guard, Elias’s father, that night, but he was killed before Anders’s group even arrived.
The Resistance was smart. They eliminated our strongest guards first, weakening our defenses, to ultimately reach my family. ”
Carmen quirked a brow at Anders. “Okay. So you saved the Alpha King and his father with your group of rogues, but that still doesn’t explain how you came to be the head guard.”
My father smiles. “Anders wasn’t the only one who knew how to obtain information.
Duck tracked the rogues. He trusted someone in the group.
He discovered that a teenage boy led the rogues to aid us, and he and my father traveled to Whitemore plantation, known as Parker territory back then, and spoke to Alpha Agnus.
When my father learned of Anders’s situation, he decided he wanted to bring Anders into our home, offer him guidance, serve as a role model, and fill in as a father figure, which he felt Anders needed.
Anders is a natural Alpha. It was obvious he needed another Alpha to help him understand himself.
“Anders came to live with us a few days later. At the time, the head guard and Duck’s family also lived in the mansion.
He was close to Elias and Chris’s age. Over time, he grew close to the pair.
I was ten and maybe a little bratty, before life circumstances changed me.
Chris and Elias usually ignored me, even though I looked up to them. But Anders was my hero. Still is.”
My father smiles and slaps Anders on the back. Anders smirks, lowering his gaze.
“I was a pain in the ass, following him everywhere, copying everything he did. I wanted to be just like him. But he never made me feel like I was a bother. He never told me to leave him alone. He talked to me all the time and taught me how to fight, to protect myself. So, I became his shadow. In my eyes, he was my big brother.”
Anders grunts. “You’re still a pain in my ass.”
My father laughs. “I love you, too. Anyway, Duck took over as interim head guard. He and my father decided to recruit the rogues, who fought alongside the guards.”
“Who are the rogues?” I ask.
“You’ve met them. In fact, two of them work as part of the household staff,” Anders clarifies.
“Joe’s a rogue?”
Anders chuckles. “He’s a guard now, but yes, he once was a rogue.
When he learned that I came to stay at the mansion, he took a job on the staff.
He was the first friend I made when I moved to the LS territory.
He became protective of me, knowing I didn’t make the best decisions, considering where my head was at, at the time.
He wanted to keep an eye on me. He also became very protective of Nathan.
When he completed his training, he decided to remain as staff in the household.
He served as both guard and butler. Xavier took the chauffeur position. ”
I smile, thinking of Joe and Xavier. “They’re older than you. You just jumped into their group and bossed them around?” I tease Anders.
He grimaces. “I didn’t boss anyone around. They had a goal, one I shared, so I used my training from the Asian territory, even though I wasn’t done yet, and taught them.”
My father adds, “Even at a young age, Anders was quite skilled. Both my father and Duck were pleasantly surprised to see the rogues in combat training, even more so because, in a short time, they learned to fight, strategize, and work together as a unit. All their training came from a young teenage boy. They allowed Anders to oversee some of the training, under their guidance, of course. It became pretty evident what Anders was meant to do.”
“Yes, but wasn’t that a role meant for Elias?” Carmen interjects.
Anders nods. “I didn’t want the role. I wasn’t born into the family, and I wasn’t officially adopted.
So they created a hierarchy of sorts—a head guard position with a second and third lead role.
They would determine each role later when we came of age.
I was perfectly fine with the second or third lead position.
“You must understand, for the first time in my life, I had friends and a family. I didn’t want to disrupt anything meant to be theirs.
I was open about how I felt, and I didn’t begrudge Chris or Elias anything.
In fact, I decided to join the military.
Chris and Elias wanted to come with me, but their other obligations required they remain at home.
So I went alone, hoping that when I returned, Elias or Chris would fill the head guard position.
Anders pauses, gazing intently at Christian. What is he trying to convey? He reaches for a glass of water on a nearby table. I smile at him in encouragement to continue.
“I was nineteen when I left for basic training. I met my true mate a couple of weeks before I was due to leave. I tried to fight the bond. It wasn’t safe for her to be with me.
It haunted me, knowing her fate would be that of my parents and grandfather.
I tried to stay away until I couldn’t anymore.
“I kept my relationship a secret. I didn’t want anyone to know.
I wrote to her every chance I could under a fake name.
She wrote back. After basic training, I returned home for a short vacation and snuck off to meet her every chance I had.
I loved her. I wanted to keep her safe and protected, even if it meant protecting her from me.
So, I didn’t hesitate when I received new orders for a job.
I finally confided in Joe and Xavier and asked them to keep an eye on her, to make sure she was safe.
“A short while later, after I returned to the military, I received word that she was pregnant. Between Joe, Xavier, and I, we moved her to the Northern A territory under the ruse that she planned to attend college. She did go—I made sure of it after. When my twin boys were born, I relocated them to the Asian territories to be raised by the same family who raised me. By then, my mate hated me. I refused to tell her where they were. She lost her children… and me. I paid for her education and kept tabs on her until she returned to her family. I stayed in the military, and between deployments, I visited the boys from time to time. I know it wasn’t enough.
I needed to protect them. I… I… would rather see them alive, safe, even if I couldn’t be in their lives completely.
“I wanted it to be different, especially when Chris and Elias met their mates.
It killed me to see how happy they were.
When I came home five years later, I had a crazy idea that maybe we could make it work.
I lived with the Alpha King and became part of the guard.
I found her again and pleaded with her to forgive me.
She sent word that she wanted to see me and talk, so I had hope.
As we left our secret meeting place, I had gotten word of another deployment.
I promised that when I returned, I would find a way to become a family again.
“My deployment extended for years. I couldn’t write or call anyone.
When I finally returned to base, Joe notified me that the Alpha King wasn’t doing well.
I needed to return home as soon as possible.
I arrived in time to sit at his bedside and say our final goodbyes.
It was the worst day of my life, and it worsened by the minute.
“I found a letter from my mate, dated two years prior, claiming she didn’t want to see me anymore. She didn’t want me to find her. I planned to find her anyway to explain why I was gone for so long. But the doctor called for a family meeting. They found traces of poison in the Alpha’s blood.
“Everything happened at once. I lost a man whom I called a father, and I lost my mate. I was enraged that the guards allowed this to occur. I lost sight of everything else and made it my personal mission to find the asshole who killed the Alpha King. When I found him, I made sure he knew exactly why he was dying. My grief, anger, and regrets consumed me after that. I reverted to my original thinking, that I couldn’t risk being involved with my mate or my sons.
I convinced myself that who I was, even being with the royal family, wasn’t safe.
So I decided to dedicate my entire life to protecting those right in front of me, my brother, because every time I looked at him, I saw the ten-year-old boy who lost his parents, like me, to the Resistance. I promised his father—”
“Our father,” my father corrects in a hushed tone.
“Our father,” Anders repeats. “I promised I would protect him with my life. Between the four of us, we built the guard recruit program so that nothing like that would ever happen again.”
My father clears his throat. “I named Anders head guard after my father died. Elias and Chris agreed.”
Anger swells within me that Anders gave up so easily on his mate and his sons. But I understand, more than he may think. I guess history has a way of repeating itself.
Anders turns to me. “When I learned you were mine, I wanted to find my mate and ask her what the hell happened. I had no idea you existed. At the time, I couldn’t trust myself not to hurt her, for hurting you.
” He swallows hard. “After some time, though, I realized your mother would never allow such a travesty to happen to you. I know her better than that. I know in my heart she never told me about you because she wanted to keep you. I couldn’t be the man she needed, and she at least had you. ”
He leans forward in his seat, resting his elbows on his knees, and covers his face with his hands.
“Anders,” my father whispers.
“Don’t, Nathan,” he mutters.
I rub his back. His despair breaks my heart. I wonder if there is some way, through this stupid show, I could find her, find some answers.
Anders drops his hands and gazes at me. “I haven’t seen your mother in twenty-five years. Every time I look at my boys, I see her… and you. You have my eyes and my hair, but so many aspects of you remind me of her.”
“Anders,” my mother whispers from the end on the couch. “Maybe it’s not too late,” she offers.
“She will never forgive me for what I did. After twenty-five years, she’s likely moved on by now. I don’t blame her, if that’s her choice and she’s happy. That’s all that matters to me.”
Swirling small circles on his back with my fingers, I feel his pain behind his words. “You love her,” I declare.
He drops his head, hiding the pain that flashes across his face. “I never stopped.”
We take a much-needed break after Anders’s confession. My parents want to consult with each other in private, and I answer emails and some text messages. We all return at the allocated time.
Carmen breezes into the room as I take my seat. “We are missing one of your family members.”
I glance over at my mother on my left, my father on the far end of the couch, and Anders still seated on my right. “I don’t understand. I’m pretty sure I covered everyone.”
“You haven’t really spoken about Luke.”
I clear my throat. I don’t want to discuss him. “Well, that’s easy. He was away at school. I didn’t really know him that well.”
She narrows her eyes. “I don’t believe you. I think it’s important you talk about him so the viewers know your entire family.”
“Uh, isn’t the whole point for viewers to watch a bunch of men fight over me to win a contest?
” My mother jabs me in the side with her elbow.
Her smile doesn’t falter, but I catch her motherly side-eye, the one she usually reserves for the twins.
I roll my eyes. Fine. “Let’s see. I can’t remember where I left off.
” I try to evade her question, but Carmen is too perceptive.
She reviews her notes. “You spent the day with your father. Anders explained his position in the royal family. You started talking about the incident that led you here, but I cut you off. Let’s jump in with how you met Luke.”
I pinch the bridge of my nose. I really don’t want to, especially with my parents here.
My mother reaches for my hand. Concern crinkles the corners of her eyes. “Did something happen between you and Luke you don’t want to talk about?”
A lot happened that I don’t want to share. How much do I say? It’s complicated, and I don’t want to portray Luke poorly on national TV.
Sighing, I shake my head. I peek at my father, who mirrors her look of concern.
I lick my lips. “It took me a few weeks to acclimate to my new home. I got along well with everyone, but it was hard to accept all I was given. I continued to feel like I didn’t deserve them.
So, my parents decided to give me chores.
I worked with Duck at the dairy, and Tater gave me tasks around the house.
I also went with Mom on her pack rounds and pretended to be my father’s secretary when he worked in the office.
On occasion, I dusted and cleaned Anders’s office. ”
My parents all laugh, remembering those days.
“It was the only way she would accept her allowance and other gifts we gave her,” my father admits with a smile. “I don’t think I ever met a teenager so unwilling to accept free money. Even when we gave her an allowance, she returned half to invest in stocks and to pay off her medical debt.”
Carmen frowns. “You had medical debt?”
My mother shakes her head. “No, she didn’t, but she insisted she pay for time and treatments while at the clinic.”
I blush, shrugging. “I just felt it was the right thing to do.”