Chapter 50
So Many Emotions
LIAM
TWO WEEKS AGO:
Luna Solar City: Concert Venue
Iwatch the show from afar with a slew of emotions running through me—pride, awe, admiration, and love.
Watching Jessica sing as her alter ego ‘G,’ then watching her as herself walking the runway in her designer clothing.
With everything she endured these past three years, I am so damn proud she took this leap—that is, until she comes out without her mask.
Jealousy overwhelms me, especially when that male model removes her trench coat. I want to jump up on the stage and kill him.
The man to my left starts to grope his mate, and the one on my right adjusts his pants, breathing hard. I itch to grab him by the throat and inform him that his hard-on is for my girl. If he wants to keep it, he needs to control his shit.
Sure, other models flaunt around in less clothing, but I only have eyes for her. I’m a cocky bastard, and my ego is pretty big. I always think everyone is after my girl. Instead of losing my temper, I clench my hands to my sides.
During the closing song of the night, Jessica steps out surrounded by other models, all faux-leather dresses in different styles similar to what a submissive or a dominant would wear.
Akiyo moves alongside her, harmonizing with her.
Her song is seductive, powerful, and dangerous—all about women being viewed as submissive, but they have power. They are in control and fearless.
The backdrop suddenly flashes a picture of Emily. I know exactly what my girl is doing, sending a big fuck-you message to the Resistance. She is done hiding, and if they want her, they need to come get her. Fear and fury grip my gut.
I move just as the song ends, intending to seek her out before anyone else finds her. It’s been so long since I last saw her. I miss her so fucking much. The sight of her alone drives me over the edge.
I find her in the alley. I catch her scent, and I am done. I can’t even finish what I intended to, which is get her the fuck out of here and tear her ass apart for her performance. When she urges me to fuck her, how the hell can I say no?
The irrational part of my brain still wants to punish her for risking her life, for torturing me.
I make her plead and pant, struggling for more of what only I can give her.
Be damned that we fuck up against a wall in the middle of an alleyway.
I’ve taken her in worse places when she drives me absolutely crazy.
And Jessica knows exactly how to turn the tables on me. I cave, giving her exactly what she wants. But I want it, too. We remain in our postcoital bliss, smashed against the wall, unmoving, catching our breath, breathing in each other’s scents.
I miss her so much. It kills me that I have to stay away.
She finally breaks the silence between us. “How long are you staying this time?”
I wince at her words. They no longer carry an undertone of irritation or sadness. No, Jessica accepted our way long ago. She never questions it, never fights it, although sometimes I wish she would. More specifically, my ego needs reassurance that she still wants me as much as I still want her.
I gently kiss her lips. “A couple of days.” I slide out of her and guide her down onto her feet. Once she’s steady, I cup her face in both of my hands and kiss her again. I search her face and find hints of sadness and worry that weren’t there before.
She steps back to adjust her clothing, avoiding my gaze. I stare at her, adjusting my pants and tucking in my shirt. “Talk to me, baby. What’s going on?”
“A lot has happened since I saw you last. It’s been one hell of a day.”
“Okay. Come back with me to the hotel, and I promise we can talk first before I bury myself inside of you for the next forty hours,” I tease, trying to lighten the mood. I hate seeing her fight some internal turmoil.
She shakes her head. “I’m staying, Liam.”
I frown. She never turns me away. What the hell? No point in arguing with her or cajoling her into coming with me. I know my girl, but I also know one way to convince her.
I step closer and grab the front of her dress.
Part of her red bodice peeks out beneath the fabric.
“ I change my mind. I’m going to take you to the hotel, rip this off you, burn it like those panties you were wearing, and then bury myself inside of you for the next two days.
” With my hand in her hair, I expose her neck and lick from the base up to her ear.
“You can tell me everything that’s been going on as I ravish your body and pump my hard cock in and out of that sweet pussy of yours. ” I press my body against hers.
She tugs both of my wrists, and I immediately let go. “No, Liam. I’m staying,” she repeats softly, no fight behind her words.
I step back to allow her some space. “Okay. Then, we’ll stay.” Reaching for her again, she retreats. She pretends to fix her dress and hair. Slow tendrils of fear weave their way along my spine.
We’ve been here before. She behaved this way when she chose someone else. Not just anyone, my former best friend. I close my eyes, forcing the thought away. My fear of losing her makes me paranoid.
“Baby, talk to me. Don’t push me away. We can stay, or we can go. I don’t care. I just want to be with you. I’m here for you.” I tip her chin, forcing her to meet my eye.
She covers her forehead with a hand. “Liam,” she breathes my name, and her face crumples. “Alpha Agnus passed. She named me her successor, but that’s not the worst part. The seventh territory comes with the title.”
I inhale sharply. As a female successor, she must be mated to keep her position as Alpha.
It’s a common tradition but rarely implemented due to so few female Alphas named.
A young female Alpha like Jessica, especially in the LS territory, will be forced to mate, or she will be challenged to the death for her position.
The Whitemore pack is small. No one would make a big deal if their Alpha is unmated.
No one would really care, but adding the seventh territory into the mix—shifters have fought and died over that territory.
There’s a reason why it remains vacant, why it’s been protected for years by the Alpha King. Her life is in danger more now than it ever has been.
Thinking back on her performance, she did that on purpose. Fear couples with panic, clenching my chest in a vise. A flurry of different possibilities race through my mind. I involuntarily step back, as if someone punched me in the gut.
A flicker of hurt crosses her features. She thinks I’m rejecting her. She turns and says more forcefully, “I’m staying here.”
I grab her arm. “Wait. You didn’t give me a chance to—”
“What were you thinking, Exposing yourself like that?!” We both pivot toward the booming voice at the entrance of the alleyway. I step in front of Jessica as Luke stomps toward us. His nostrils flare, no doubt smelling our recent coupling still lingering in the air.
Jessica tries to come around me, but I grip her arm, holding her back.
“Is he the one you’re with?” he snarls, eyes flaring wide, his face reddening. He glares at me now, but I refuse to move.
I peer over my shoulder at Jessica. She won’t look at him. Her cheeks flush.
“You selfish bastard, still stringing her along after all this time?” he spits.
My head jerks forward to face him. This is long overdue. We might have entered a short truce between us for Emily, but I’ll never forgive him for what he did. He took Jessica from me. “Stringing her along? We would still be together if not for you!” I accuse.
“Together?!” he shouts. “I had nothing to do with what happened. You had an obligation, a responsibility to your pack that you ran from.”
I cut off his bullshit. “There are no rules that forbid us from being together. If you want to talk about rules, how about we review the legal documentation that states you’re her older adoptive brother. But that hasn’t stopped you! As soon as you got rid of me, you made your move.”
He closes the space between us, getting in my face. “You had your chance to come back for her, to write to her, call her, text her. You’re the one who chose to ghost her. I stood by and watched her fall apart, waiting for you to return. I’m the one who—”
“Enough!” Jessica yells, forcing her way between us.
“Did you tell her why you never came back?” Luke sneers.
I issue a low warning growl.
He barks with laughter. “You never told her. Did you?”
I glance down at Jessica, her hand resting on my chest. The electricity crackles from her palms, but it’s nothing compared to the pain wrapped around my heart.
She asks, “Tell me what?” I don’t answer her right away. “Tell me what, Liam?” Her hand trembles. I can’t bring myself to say it. She turns toward Luke. Motherfucker actually has the balls to look remorseful. “Tell me!” she shouts, sending small shocks into my body.
“He’s betrothed, Jessica.” More shocks shoot from her hands, and he clears his throat. “The invitation to his mating ceremony is dated for one week from today.”
She lowers her head and drops both of her hands from our chests. I don’t know what to say. I don’t know how to fix this. I squeeze my eyes shut, waiting for the execution. Her heels click on the pavement.
Luke offers, “Let me take you home.”
Of course, he will act as her savior. I can’t watch her leave with him.
“Luke!” she screams. “Stop it. Just stop! You’re not any better than him!
” I open my eyes as she shoves him away.
“You’re mated. Or did you forget? You mated the most horrible piece-of-shit woman on the planet.
Elaine made my life miserable for years.
Now, you expect me to—what? Choose you? Be with you after you chose her over me? ”
I look at Luke, his shoulders droop, he squeezes his eyes close.
She whirls around to face me. “I already knew that you were betrothed, but for some stupid idiotic reason, I still let you in.” She comes closer, tears streaking down her face.
“So why visit this time, huh? One last goodbye fuck, or maybe a proposal to continue on as your side piece? No, wait!” She snaps her fingers.
“You weren’t planning on saying anything.
Just disappear like you always do, without a word, and leave me wondering if I will ever see you again.
Then, you’ll show up, just when I finally feel like moving on again. ”
I grind my teeth and clench my fists at my sides. I can’t force the right words out of my mouth. The pain around my heart intensifies, and yet I can’t utter a fucking word.
She raises an eyebrow. “I have loved you for eight years, and you have nothing to say?” She looks down at her hands.
“That’s fine because I have one last thing to say to both of you.
I’m done. I’m done playing these games.” She raises her chin, her tears glinting in the moonlight.
“I don’t choose either of you. So, please, just leave me the fuck alone! ”
She turns, but I won’t let her walk away.
I can explain. I will fix this. I ignore Luke and rush after her. His footsteps echo behind me, but I don’t care. I need to stop her.
I catch up to her, grabbing her arm and turning her to face me. “Please just listen, Jessica. Don’t leave, not like this.” Desperate, I cup her face, bringing her close to me, resting my forehead against hers. I see how much she hurts, and I want to take it away.
She pushes me, but I won’t let her go. She starts to fight me.
Luke interferes, pulling me from her. I turn on him. Everything—all of this, losing her—happened because of him. I hit him in the face, knocking him back. He comes right back with a punch to my ribs and one to my jaw.
Thunder booms over our heads. We both stop mid-fight, covering our ears.
Clutching Luke’s shirt, she cries, “Go home, Luke! I don’t want to see you. I don’t want you in my life!”
He wipes blood from his lips and sneers at her. “That’s a bit hard, given the circumstances. Don’t you think?”
Through gritted teeth, she adds, “I’ve managed to make it work for three years. I’m pretty sure I can do it for the rest of my life!” The anger in his eyes morphs into despair as she walks toward me.
I move to wrap my arm around her waist.
She holds up her hand. “Liam, go home. I’m pretty sure your fiancée must be wondering where you are.” She glares, ice blue eyes I once compared to a warm sky, now hard and cold. With a warning rumble, she walks out of my life, taking my heart with her again.