Penny
“Be right back. Two cups of coffee and a long drive. You do the math.”
Elizabeth stands—no, springs—to her feet. Despite their similar features, Elizabeth and Jacob are polar opposites. She has a warm, buoyant personality, in contrast to her brother’s reserved, made-of-cement temperament.
When she disappears, my body deflates on a long exhale and I melt into the couch. I’m weary after being on edge since Elizabeth arrived.
Jacob’s sister almost caught us in bed together. Sure, she would’ve needed a key to get in, and she would’ve had to come all the way to the bedroom without us being aware.
The fact remains: while his sister was only a few feet away, Jacob and I were kissing each other.
If she hadn’t interrupted us, we probably would’ve done more than that too.
Shame warms my face and I cover it. With my temporary loss of sight, it’s easier to see the filthy replays of this morning and last night.
His lips against mine, his voice, his touch, the sight of him pleasuring himself. Jacob looked like he was barely holding himself back from fucking me while I desperately wished he would let go of his restraint.
He made me call him Daddy and I liked it.
It’s strange how you’ll know something is wrong, that there are pretty bad consequences if you do it, but still want to do it anyway. My good judgment and willpower vanished the moment Jacob touched me.
“Hey, are you OK?”
I lower my hands to my lap, forcing a smile at Elizabeth’s concerned expression.
“Just a little tired. I didn’t get enough sleep.”
She plonks down in the couch beside me. “What kept you up?”
I was worried your brother would try to fuck me and that I would let him.
I shrug. “I can’t say.”
No, really. I can’t.
“When did you come up to see Jake?”
“Earlier this week.”
“Really? You’ve been staying here for a week?” She darts a glance around. “But this is a small place. There’s only one bedroom. Where you do you sleep?”
When she meets my gaze again, something in her eyes makes me uneasy again. There’s a sharpness in them, like her mind is running calculations that might lead to conclusions I don’t want her to reach.
I pat the cushion beside me. “Right here.”
She makes a face. “Jake makes you sleep on the couch? He could at least be a gentleman and give you his bed.”
Oh, he did. It was a bad idea.
“I don’t mind. The couch is comfortable.”
Her stare lingers on my face before sliding lower to my neck. She complimented me on the collar a few minutes ago. She’s looking at it again like she’s studying it.
Elizabeth might be different than Jacob, but they share the ability to make a person sweat under their sharp gaze. I wish Jacob hadn’t left me alone with her. What if I accidentally spill the beans about everything that’s been going on?
“You drove up from Toronto?” I ask, hoping to distract her.
“I was in Sudbury for a shoot so it wasn’t too far to drop by.” She pauses. “Why have you spent a week here?”
I choose my words carefully.
“Uh… Jacob agreed to help me like you said he would. Since my car was totalled, he… ah… suggested I stay so we could work things out.”
Elizabeth lights up. “That makes me happy. It’s exactly what I was hoping for when I told you to come see him. I want you guys to have the relationship you used to have.”
That ship has sailed.
After last night, there’s zero chance of me and Jacob going back to the way we used to be.
I force a smile. “Like Jacob said, it’s a work-in-progress.”
She purses her lips. “Well, part of the work should be the nicknames. He calls you Penelope. You call him Jacob. You guys will have to fix that.” She sighs.
“I want closure for him. He’s still holding on to anger about what happened.
I think he’ll be able to finally let it go if he can accept none of it was your fault. ”
“Some of it was,” I say quietly. “I testified—”
She makes me pause by putting her hand on my arm just above my fading bruise.
“You spoke the words, but it was your mom who put them in your mouth.”
“I knew speaking them was wrong.”
“You and Alyssa remind me of myself and my mother when she was alive. You wanted to please your mom because her approval was the most important thing to you at the time.”
She shakes her head, a distant look on her face as she continues.
“You would set yourself on fire just to prove the lengths you’d go to for her love. Instead of putting you out of your misery, she would say how you never do anything right because why didn’t you douse yourself in gas first so the fire would be bigger.”
It’s horrible but true, and also kind of funny. I let out a snort which turns into a laugh we both share.
When our laughter fades, Elizabeth leans back in her seat.
“I won’t lie, Penny.” She swivels a solemn look at me. “I didn’t have the most charitable feelings for you for a while, especially after Jake developed a drinking problem.”
“He did?”
Guilt weighs in my stomach. That explains why I haven’t seen a single bottle of alcohol in this house. I thought it was because Jacob is health-conscious.
Elizabeth nods. “He avoided one prison yet wound up in a different one. He got free because he’s always been stubborn as hell. He sets his mind on something and gets it done, no matter what.”
Stubborn as hell.
That’s Jacob alright.
“Anyway, I’m not trying to guilt-trip you. I’m trying to say I stopped being mad because I found some empathy. For you. Not so much your mom but we won’t get into that.” She gives me an awkward smile. “So be patient with Jake, OK? He’ll come around too.”
I nod silently, feeling guiltier than ever despite what she said. She would go back to being mad at me if she found out the things I’ve done with her brother.
Elizabeth springs to her feet again and grins.
“Enough of this moody conversation. I’m fucking starving.”
I stand too. “I could make us an omelette.”
“Nah, I’m thinking a small town diner will hit the spot.” She rubs her stomach. “And I need to get out of here. After being cooped up in my car for two hours, this house feels like a prison cell.”
If only you knew how right you are, Liz.
She goes over to the coat rack and puts on her jacket and hat. After she slings her bag over her shoulder, she turns to me with an expectant look.
“Come on. Get dressed and let’s go.”
I squeeze my hands into fists, remembering Jacob’s threat that first day he took control of my life.
You will not leave this house.
Three strikes if you disobey.
He’ll make an exception for this, right? After all, I’m keeping his sister company in his absence.
I stand and go to Elizabeth.
* * *
A car rumbles to a stop outside as a demon-possessed farmer corners a priest in a barn on the TV.
Jacob’s home.
Earlier than usual like he promised Elizabeth.
I snatch up the remote, my finger poised on the off button as the demon-farmer stabs the wailing priest in the neck.
Oh, what’s the point.
It’s too late to pretend I wasn’t watching it. I forgot to close the curtains so I’m sure he’s already seen the TV light. I drop the remote back onto the couch.
While I continue watching the movie, I’m not paying attention to it. My mind is preoccupied with the door. Any second now—
It swings open. Jacob and a rush of chilly breeze enters the house. The sight of him seizes my full attention. I’m tense, my heart beating a little faster, a pleasant energy flooding my body.
I’m already wearing a collar. My tail would probably be wagging right now if I had one.
Pathetic.
He darts a glance between me and the TV as he shuts the door. He doesn’t look mad but I turn off the TV anyway. The rustle and thump as he removes his winter clothes and boots fill the silence. It’s still too quiet for me so I roll his sister under the bus.
“Elizabeth wanted to watch a movie.”
He turns and approaches me, stopping a few inches from the couch.
“Where is she?”
“Napping in your room.”
His silent stare and closed-off expression dampens my excitement to see him. It’s hard to believe that, just this morning, he looked at me with enough heat to burn me alive.
All day I thought about the kiss and the dirty things we did last night. Did he think about us too?
“I’m taking you home tomorrow morning,” he says in a cold voice.
My eyes widen and my mouth falls open. A sinking feeling fills my stomach.
“Because I used the TV?”
“You left the house. I warned you what would happen if you did.”
“Elizabeth wanted to eat out and walk around the town for a bit. We didn’t spend long.”
Thump, thump.
There goes poor Elizabeth under another bus.
I really hope she can’t hear our conversation.
“Did she force you to go with her? Did she physically drag you into her car?”
I hesitate. “I—no, but—”
“Then save your excuses. You made your choice. We’re done.”
He leaves the living room, disappearing down the hallway. Stunned by the unpleasant turn of events, I can’t think quickly enough to say something.
We’re done.
Just like that?
Without anything to show for it?
How is that fair when he’s taken more than he’s given?
As my dismay turns into anger, Elizabeth comes out, rubbing her eyes.
“Jake wanted to shower so he kicked me out of his room.”
He’s kicking everybody out.
I feel a spike of irritation with her. She’s technically the reason why I’m being kicked out. Then again, Jacob has a point. She didn’t force me to go outside, against his order. I made the choice to do it.
Whenever I’m given options, you can count on me to pick the worst one.
Elizabeth frowns and opens her mouth. I stand before she can speak.
“I’m going to get dinner started.”
“Need any help?” she offers.
I force a smile. “If you want to.”
My bad mood lifts as Elizabeth and I work together to prep for a stir fry. It’s clear she never makes her own meals. Somehow, she cuts herself twice with the peeler as she’s peeling the carrots.
When Jacob comes out, Elizabeth abandons me to hang out with him in the living room. Every so often, I glance over at them, and I’m taken aback by Jacob’s personality change.