28. Cameron
28
CAMERON
I watch Lizzie walk away, and I honestly can’t believe that everything worked out the way it did. She’s the best person I’ve ever known for forgiving me the way she did. She deserves the fucking world, and I’m going to do everything in my power to give it to her. At a pace she’s comfortable with.
I can’t rush things with Lizzie. She has no experience when it comes to relationships, and I need to make sure that this is what she actually wants and not just her fulfilling her teenage fantasy. I’ve been in relationships, I was married, I had kids, but I can’t forget Lizzie has barely had sex.
Until I changed that last night. And this morning. And I’m feeling very smug about it.
Ugh. I can’t think about sex with Lizzie right now. I’m going to have a boner while I talk to Mikey and his crew. I take a deep breath to compose myself, then turn back to the guys waiting for me.
I’m immediately met with the smirks of men whose eyes shine with jealousy from the display I just put on.
“We ready to get started?” I ask.
“Are you? It seems like we might’ve interrupted something.” The smirk on Mikey’s face as he says it tells me it’s going to be a long day of razzing. And I’m totally up for it. Nothing can kill my mood.
My phone rings, so I give him the okay to get started and pull my phone out of my pocket.
Fuck me.
I spoke too soon. Something can definitely kill my mood, and that’s my ex-wife. I contemplate sending the call to voicemail but then remember we have two daughters together, and maybe she wants to talk about something to do with them.
“Hello.” I tell myself to keep my tone even and not snap at her for missing the last three weeks of phone calls with the girls. Her only responsibility when it comes to them is to make a weekly phone call and have some small talk. She can’t even do that, and Addy and Mackenzie deserve better.
If she can’t make the minimal effort when it comes to them, she doesn’t need to be involved at all. The girls would be better off without her, in my opinion, but they miss her, and I can’t deny them their mother. Every week with no call from her hurts them, though, and I need to get that through her head.
“Hey, Cam. How’s life in the boonies?” Her laugh that I now find intensely irritating rings through the phone, and I’m a second away from hanging up on her.
“What do you want, Renee?”
“I’m calling to check in, what do you think I’m doing?” There’s an edge to her voice that I recognize as one of her tells. She’s raring for a fight. I won’t give her the satisfaction, though.
“You’re supposed to call every Thursday at five o’clock, and we haven’t heard from you in three weeks. It is currently Tuesday at eight in the morning, so forgive me if I’m a little confused.”
“I should be able to talk to my kids whenever I want, Cam. Don’t you think I deserve that after everything you’ve done?”
I was wrong. I think I do want to give her that fight after all.
“I didn’t do anything, Renee. You cheated on me. You decided that you wanted to live in another city and leave your daughters. You decided that you didn’t want to be a full-time mother and would rather parade around with your new boyfriend than be here for your kids. Who, by the way, are the greatest things that have and will ever happen to you. Every time you miss a call, you disappoint them more and more, and before you know it, Addy and Mackenzie will want nothing to do with you, and you’ll have to live with that for the rest of your life.” I’m beyond pissed off and taking heavy breaths now to try to calm down.
“I didn’t call so you could lecture me, Cam, so save it for another day. Let me talk to the girls,” Renee bites out.
“They aren’t available right now. Call back on Thursday at five o’clock like we agreed on.” I hang up without saying goodbye because I might say some unsavory things if I stay on the line any longer.
I’m trying to compose myself when I hear footsteps approaching. I turn around and expect to see one of the guys but find Lizzie instead holding two cups of coffee and looking extremely uncomfortable.
“Sorry if you overheard any of that. My ex-wife and I aren’t each other’s favorite person, and she knows just how to get me riled up.”
“I didn’t really hear much. I could just tell you were upset,” Lizzie says while handing me a coffee.
I look down at it and see that it’s black, no cream or sugar from the looks of it. Just the way I like it. “How do you know I take my coffee black?” I ask, genuinely intrigued.
“Just a lucky guess.”
“Thank you.” I lean in and give her a chaste kiss. Just because I can. God, this feels good. Not fighting my feelings for Lizzie Montgomery makes me feel the lightest I have since my life started falling apart. It gives me hope that maybe I’m not messing everything up. That I’m doing something right.
I can only hope she doesn’t change her mind about me. That whatever hold I have over her sticks, and she doesn’t realize that she can get someone younger and with less emotional damage and baggage.
“Sorry again for all my stupidity these past few days,” I speak against her lips. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to stop apologizing for my behavior.
Lizzie kisses me hard and then steps back before things heat up too much.
“No more apologies. I’m serious. We’re good. We’re great actually. It’s a good thing the girls ratted you out. I think we needed the push.”
“I have a feeling I’m going to get ganged up with the three of you,” I laugh.
Lizzie’s smile gets even bigger and I can tell she likes the sound of that. “They really are great girls. So smart and funny and well-behaved. You’ve done a really good job with them, Cameron.”
She’s so sincere and sweet, and it doesn’t surprise me that the girls talk about her non-stop. Lizzie Montgomery needs to be protected at all costs, and in this moment, I vow to be the one who’ll do it. Addy, Mackenzie, and I will be the ones to give her everything she wants, and no one is going to get in the way of that. Especially my ex-wife.
* * *
The rest of the day moves on quickly. Lizzie goes back to her studio to work on her latest pieces. My sister drops Addy and Mackenzie off around three with a look on her face that tells me she wants to know what happened but can’t ask in front of the girls. Morgan’s definitely been talking.
Mikey and his crew finish up for the day around four. The kitchen is progressing faster than what was originally planned, and they’ll be moving on to fixing the floors throughout the whole house next.
“How was your party, Daddy?” Mackenzie asks while we’re painting nails in the living room, since the girls ran out of time to do it with my sister and their cousins.
“It was fun.” I lie. It was stressful and frustrating.
“I wish we could have gone,” Addy whines.
“Nah. You guys would have been bored. Lots of adults. You guys had way more fun with your cousins and the babysitter.”
“Yeah but we could have hung out with Miss Lizzie.”
I’ve been thinking about how I’m going to approach talking to the girls about me and Lizzie being an item all day, but I couldn’t figure out the best way. This might be my best chance.
“Speaking of Lizzie, girls, what do you think of her? Do you like her?” I ask, moving my concentration from the nail polish so I could see the girls’ reaction.
“We love her,” Addy says.
“So much. She’s so nice and said she can do our hair and helps us with our pottery. Plus, I like her clothes.” Mackenzie exclaims, and the excitement I see on her face when she talks about Lizzie is surprising.
Since Renee left, Mackenzie has been more closed off and not as vibrant as she used to be. I find that she doesn’t express herself as much, and it probably has to do with some sort of misplaced blame over her mom leaving.
Now that I think about it, she lights up whenever Lizzie is around or if she’s brought up in conversation somehow. She can’t stop talking about the pottery class and how much she’s looking forward to the next one and seeing Lizzie.
It’s clear that Lizzie Montgomery has stolen the hearts of my girls like she’s stolen mine. That’s a sobering thought, but it doesn’t send me into an anxiety attack like I thought it would. Instead, it feels comforting and puts my mind at ease.
“I like her clothes too, Mackenzie. I actually like more than her clothes. I like all of her. A lot.” I stare at the girls and wait for recognition to show on their faces. All I get are blank stares and looks of confusion.
Great. This isn’t going as well as I had hoped it would.
“We know,” Addy says casually, surprising me.
“You do?” I ask.
“Yep. You smile really big when she’s around,” Mackenzie declares while shoving another piece of chicken in her mouth. “She smiles at you too. Not yesterday, though. I think she’s mad at you.”
“Did you do something mean to Lizzie, Daddy?” Addy asks accusingly.
Wow. I wasn’t expecting to be called out for my behavior by my four-year-old daughter today. “I did. I wasn’t very nice to her. But I apologized and she forgave me.” God, did she forgive me.
“Good. You don’t want to be a meanie. Meanies are mean,” Addy states proudly.
“That they are, Addy girl.” I take a deep breath to prepare myself for the next part of the conversation, hoping the girls catch on quickly. “So, I really like Lizzie. And Lizzie really likes me. And we’re going to be hanging out with each other a lot from now on.”
I’m again met with two sets of eyes that look just like my own, staring at me like I’m not making any sense. I wait for a response, but only silence hangs in the air . Maybe I should try a different approach?
“Is she going to be your girlfriend?” Mackenzie asks.
“Umm, yeah, she is. Is that okay?”
“Yeah,” the girls say together.
“Okay. Good.” I expected that to be harder for some reason, but I honestly don’t know why. Addy and Mackenzie are the best, and so is Lizzie, so I should have known they’d all make it easy on me.
We finish painting nails and I order Chinese takeout for dinner. After we’ve eaten, we go through their nighttime routine of showers, brushing teeth, and stories. As soon as the girls are asleep in their beds, I plan on texting Lizzie and asking her to meet me under the stars.
She better say yes.