7. Chapter 7
7
Chapter 7
Blue
Turning around and walking out of the warehouse and away from Sean was just as hard now as leaving him had been all those years ago. There was just something about him, there’d always been something about him. He eased her soul. Made her feel calm even when life battered her around like high winds at the top of a cliff before a base jump. He was the calm in her stormy life. Even now. Even after a decade he still had that impact on her.
With slow, but sure strides, she headed out the door and down to the boardwalk on the beach. The cool night air felt good on her overheated skin, and she fanned herself to get more of it as she took deep breaths. A couple passed, walking barefoot in the sand, hand-in-hand, and Blue’s mind went back to all the times she and Sean had done the same. It made her heart ache.
She hadn’t wanted to leave tonight. She’d wanted to sit down on that rickety old couch of his in his office and talk. Really talk to someone who listened with his whole being. Let his warmth wash over her. But she couldn’t do that. Their relationship hadn’t exactly ended on a positive note, and she was engaged now. As much as she’d like to pretend that she and Sean could be friends, they couldn’t. Never just friends. That wasn’t who they were to one another, and it never would be. She couldn’t do that to him, to her, or to Jonah.
She especially couldn’t stay after she’d learned Sean’d named his boat after her. She didn’t even want to think about the significance of that, but for some reason, it’d made her feel terribly guilty.
Besides, Sean wasn’t safe. In the past, he’d had a hold on her that had felt secure until he’d left and nearly toppled what was really a teetering existence. With him, she’d thought she’d found solid ground, but the moment he’d left he’d pulled it out from under her like a carpet from under a three-legged chair. Like stepping off a cliff without a parachute and no water below.
She mindlessly waved at another couple passing her on the boardwalk as she headed toward the pier shops and her apartment over Leather and Lace, her ring on her left hand catching the light from a streetlamp. The stone was a marquise, 4.5 carats, and glittered like the stars at night.
Jonah was safe because she never worried about what would happen to her if he left—not that she expected him to leave. But she didn’t love him the way she loved Sean, wild and free. Love could be controlled, calm, sure, steady, predictable, and boring.
Not that Jonah was boring. No. Psha. He was a thrill seeker, just like her. Exciting. Bold. Daring. Those were the words that described him.
Coming up in the distance at the beach park, the Ferris Wheel happily spun in slow circles, the white lights reflected off the bay as it went round and round. Another memory hit her, this one with a force that nearly knocked the wind out of her. A memory of her and her little brother riding a similar Ferris wheel back in Chicago.
Blue screamed as the Ferris wheel came to a stop at the top of the ride and a spider scurried over her leg and onto the seat between her and Dominic.
Dom arched a brow at her.
“Get it, get it!” she yelped, pressing against the side of the carriage and as far away from the bug as humanly possible.
“It’s just a spider.” Dom scooped the massive eight-leg creature into his palm. He smiled at it. Actually smiled. Like it was Charlotte right out of her web and they were going to be the best of friends.
“Don’t play with it,” Blue said, feeling exasperated. “It could be poisonous.”
“It’s a daddy longlegs. It can’t hurt me.” The spider scrambled out of his palm and over the back of Dom’s hand. Dom stood, sending their carriage rocking. He leaned out over the side toward the frame of the Ferris wheel and Blue grabbed the back of his shirt.
“Careful.” She peered down to where their friend Ian was letting a couple into one of the carriages. Ian worked at the park; had been running the Ferris wheel for as long as Blue could remember and had made friends with them when they started coming multiple times per week. Ian glanced up at them—his wavy blond hair falling out of his face. “Hurry, Ian’s about to start it again.”
The night was warm, and the normally polluted Chicago sky was clear enough to see the stars for the first time in a long time.
Dom placed the spider on the frame. “There you go, little fella.” He sat back down, and she let out a sigh of relief. “Wimp,” he said. Even at thirteen, he was almost taller than her, and definitely braver.
“You know I hate heights,” she said but relaxed as he leaned back in his seat. She glanced down at Ian and gave him a thumbs up, and he smiled and wandered back to the controls.
“Then why do you always come on this with me?” Dom asked.
She shrugged, just as the wheel jerked forward one more spot and stopped again. “You like it.”
He tucked his arm in hers and her stiff posture eased substantially. “That’s my brave big, lil sis.” He’d been calling her “lil sis” for the last six months since he’d shot up and outgrown her.
She chuckled. “Brave? Right. Sure. That’s what we’ll call this.”
“You’re braver than you think.” He crossed his legs at his ankles.
“Who are you, Gandhi? I thought I was the big sibling around here.” She nudged his shoulder with her own.
“Oh, you definitely are,” he teased. “You’re like having another parent.”
“Am not!”
“Are too,” he sniggered. “You’re worse than Dad about making me get my homework done.”
She swatted his arm. “Are you kidding, I just like having someone to study with. Plus, I need someone to help me with math.”
Dom was amazing with numbers. He was only just starting high school this year and was already lined up for calculus. “Well, that’s for sure.”
“Hey!” Math had never been her forte outside basics. “Besides, who makes you cookies for helping? You know that’s not Dad.”
“Mom,” he said deadpan, then after a beat, they both burst into laughter. Mom couldn’t cook to save her life. Blue had only ever given it a go because she’d gotten into a cooking show. Normally, they had a cook make everything, but Dad indulged her interest. When pressed about why he was allowing her, The Outfits’ princess—the daughter of the consigliere—to learn to cook, he’d simply said it improved her marriageability. That had gotten people off his back and given her leeway to keep trying new things. Not that she’d ever gotten very good at anything but basic cookie recipes, and a mean mac and cheese right out of the box.
“I want oatmeal chocolate chip next time.”
She touched her chin as though thinking it over, then said, “You drive a hard bargain.” She stuck her hand out. “Deal.”
Dom shook it, his eyes, the same deep blue as hers, sparked with mirth as he chuckled. His laugh warmed her insides. The ride started up again, sending them round and round. In the distance, Chicago city lights filled the horizon.
They sat in companionable silence, listening to cheesy eighties music over the speakers, Girls Just Want to Have Fun was playing now, and letting the salty night air surround them.
He sunk in his seat, his smile fading. “I can’t believe summer’s almost over.”
They’d been avoiding discussing the end of summer since it started. In the past, they would moan and groan about the end of sleeping in, and the beginning of homework and rotten cold weather—this year, it was a different story.
“I don’t want to be a Made Man, Vittoria,” he said.
Dom rarely used her given name. He’d always preferred to call her Blue after her favorite color. A Made Man was a foot soldier in the mafia. As soon as boys turned fourteen in their world, they had to swear an oath and begin their initiation.
She stiffened in her seat next to him, and he unlinked his arm and leaned away from her. He wasn’t just creating physical distance but emotional. She wasn’t going to let him.
This time, she linked his arm with hers. “Everything’s going to be fine, Dom. You know Dad will look out for you.”
The Ferris wheel finished its route just in time, and Ian started letting people off. He opened the door to their carriage keeping Dom from continuing along this line of thought. Blue was grateful.
“How was it?” Ian asked.
Dom and Ian high-fived, and Ian ruffled Dom’s shaggy brown hair. “Awesome. As always.”
“He loves the view of the city,” Blue said as Ian gave her a half squeeze that she returned.
“It’s one of the prettiest skylines, if I do say so myself.” Ian was only a few years older than Blue—nineteen, twenty, something like that, and an orphan. He’d been on his own since he was Dom’s age and lived all over, so he knew what he was talking about. Blue couldn’t imagine that kind of freedom.
Ian treated Dom and Blue like siblings, and they loved it. Having an older brother. One that had nothing to do with the mafia. One who was so free. About a year ago, he’d started coming to Dom’s soccer games, and they’d had him over for dinner a time or two. The whole family loved him, and he loved them. He always said they were the family he never had.
“We’re getting pizza soon, when’s your break?” Blue asked.
Ian glanced at his watch. “Half hour.”
“We’ll get your pizza,” Blue said as she and Dom headed down the metal grate stairs.
Ian opened the rope to the line, letting a couple through, and called after them. “No peppers this time!”
A loud banging noise brought Blue out of her memory with a jolt that sent her head ducking, and her pulse racing. She glanced around and caught sight of an old truck driving up one of the side streets from the beach, black smoke billowing from the tailpipe. Blue put a hand to her heart and breathed deep.
It’d been a long time since she’d last thought of her brother, even longer since she’d thought of Ian, and with those thoughts came more guilt—because she just wasn’t suffering enough. She scrubbed her hands down her face, then glanced at her watch.
Was the library still open at this hour? Didn’t seem likely, but . . . she had to check. The number one rule she’d lived by since she and Dad had run, had been never to use personal devices to look up anything to do with their old life. Too risky. But if she popped into a different library now and again, she’d be okay. She’d never once looked Dom up here in Diamond Cove. Hadn’t even thought to since she moved here.
But now she needed to know.
* * *
The library was an old-fashioned building with large, stained-glass dome in the middle, dark wood shelves, leather couches and armchairs, tapestries, and huge curtains.
The librarian, an adorable gal with an edgy twist ponytail, wearing skinny jeans, studded boots with heels, and a Superman print t-shirt under a baggy sweater, was at her standing desk, going through a pile of books. Across from her, a white Labrador Retriever lay in front of an old-fashioned fireplace belly up and fast asleep.
Blue followed the signs and made her way upstairs to the second floor and way in the back left corner of the library to the computers. She passed under the bookshelves that arched over the footpaths and down red runner carpets until she came to the rows of mahogany desks, each with a vintage green glass desk lamp on it and a shiny Mac computer. Moonlight streamed through one of the stained-glass windows over the space, and it all had a very gothic-romance-novel feel to it—like Thornfield Hall in Jane Eyre or something.
She took a seat in the hard wooden chair and booted up her computer. At the browser, she took a deep breath of paper and leather-bound books, then typed in Dom’s name.
Only two things came up. His arrest and subsequent acquittal when he was eighteen, and a photo of him at their mother’s wedding to the Mattress King of Chicago seven years ago. This is why Blue’d stopped looking. She refined her search to include the term ‘obituary’ and hit enter. No results. No other leads.
“Dominic Rockefeller, son of notorious mobster, Ryker Rockefeller, acquitted on charges of murder.” A friendly voice read from behind her. Blue jumped and glanced over her shoulder. The librarian stood there with a big, old smile on her face. “There’s a mobster named Ryker Rockefeller? That’s hilarious. I wonder if Grace knows her husband shares a name with a mobster.” She laughed and extended her hand. “I’m Kate, the librarian.”
“I’m Bluebell. Nice to meet you.”
“We’re about to close up; you almost done?” Kate asked.
Blue nodded and switched off her computer. “Yes, sorry. I didn’t mean to keep you late.”
Kate shook her head. “Not at all! I was actually waiting for a friend.”
“Kate!” a female voice called out.
“Upstairs, headed down now!” Kate yelled in a way Blue had never thought anyone would in a library. The two walked down together. “You seem familiar, but I can’t quite place you.”
Blue ignored her momentary panic and remembered that Marshall Stroup had promised her and her dad that they could have real lives. Talk to people. Just as long as they stayed off socials, they could treat this town like it was their own. Because it was now. “I own Leather and Lace Boutique and Soda Shop at the pier.”
Kate’s eyes lit up. “I love that shop! Your passion fruit hibiscus ginger ale . . .” She kissed the tips of her fingers as they turned and headed down the stairs. “The best. And I love your clothes too.”
Blue chuckled. “Thanks.”
At the bottom of the stairs, Kate waved to her friend. “Grace, have you met Bluebell?”
Grace popped up from where she’d been petting the Lab, a huge smile spreading over her face. “Bluebell! Fancy running into you again.”
Lamely, Blue pointed upstairs. “I was, um, just checking my email.”
Kate laughed. “She was reading the news. Did you know there’s a mobster in Chicago named Ryker Rockefeller?”
Grace’s eyes about popped out of her head. “What?” she nearly screeched, then quickly recovered with a smile. “There is?”
Her reaction was so strange, it surprised Blue and put her on guard. She scrutinized Grace. If Blue wasn’t who she said she was, it was possible Grace wasn’t who she said she was either. They eyed one another like gunslingers in a bar, waiting to see who would draw first.
Not Kate though. “Isn’t that too funny?”
“Yeah, hilarious.” Grace was smiling, but her reaction seemed forced. She glanced at Blue and her smile turned sincere. “I thought you’d still be with Sean?”
“Who, me?” Blue pointed at herself, then wanted to smack herself in the forehead. Of course Grace meant her. “I mean, no. It was just a pop-in. To say hi. We’re old friends.”
Grace gave her a knowing look that made her uncomfortable. “Old friends, huh? I thought you said you used to date.”
“Are you talking about Sean Clayton?” Kate asked.
Grace nodded. “Yes, she and Sean have history.” Grace shimmied her shoulders.
“You’re kidding, and here I was starting to think Sean was a lost cause with women,” Kate said.
Blue blinked. “You know him too?” What was Sean, Mr. Social with the ladies now? Gah! His stupid underwear model physique and helpful personality probably earned him a loyal following of Diamond Cove single females.
“He’s my brother-in-law,” Kate said, lifting her left-hand ring finger to show a two-carat cushion-cut diamond on a plane platinum band. “Soon-to-be anyway.”
Blue’s mind whirled. “Johnny or—”
“Axel,” Kate said, with a dreamy look in her eye.
“ Axel’s getting married ?!” Blue yelled, her voice echoing throughout the large building. “Seriously?” She blinked hard. Grace nodded slowly, allowing her to take the info in and digest it. “It feels like yesterday he kicked a bra at Sean during a concert.”
Kate laughed. “Sounds about right.”
She nodded her head from side to side. “After all these years,” she mused. Through the years, Axel had been the one Clayton, she hadn’t had trouble keeping track of. He was all over the news all the time—with one girl after another. “I just wouldn’t have guessed it. Though, to be fair, I would’ve been just as surprised if it’d be Johnny.” The only one of the three Clayton boys she wouldn’t have been surprised to learn was married would’ve been Sean. He’d always been the marrying type.
“Wow, you really do know the Clayton’s well, don’t you?” Kate asked.
Blue shrugged. “Used to.”
“Well, since you’re not hanging out with Sean tonight,” Grace came up on her side and took her arm. “I think that means you should hang out with us. We’re having a girl’s night with some of our friends.”
Kate came up on her other side and took her arm. “Oh, heck to the yeah. I need to hear everything you know about the Claytons. What do you say?”
Her flight instincts kicked up, a whole night talking about her ex-boyfriend? Heck no! Then again . . . this was her home. Diamond Cove was her home . And she was allowed to have friends. “I say reciprocity. I’ll tell you what I know if you tell me what you know.”
Both women grinned.
“You’re going to fit in around here just fine,” Grace said. “Oh, yes you are.”
Blue certainly hoped so. She’d never really had girlfriends, and the call from these funny, outgoing women was strong. It made a place in her heart that she’d never really gotten a chance to fill ache just a little less. Maybe this time around, in this cozy little beach town, things would be different. Maybe it really would become her safe haven—her home.