Chapter Six
Bodhi
“I’ve got her,” I say with a sigh. “I don’t know what the fuck you all are trying to accomplish, but the victim blaming isn’t how you get information.”
“All she had to do…” the detective starts.
“All you had to do was have a little bit of fucking compassion!” I snap. “She spent a decade with a goddamn monster. Give her a fucking break.”
“Go on,” Dan says with a nod.
I turn and walk out of the station in time to see Olivia speed out of the lot. She looks absolutely distraught and should not be driving. I jog over to my truck and jump in to follow her.
She’s driving insanely fast, but I stay behind her until she pulls off the main strip and takes a back road toward the farmlands. It’s not uncommon for people to come out this way to escape for a while. I do the same thing when I want to go for a drive.
I speed up so I can get around her, but then slow down. When she honks and tries to go around me, I don’t let her. Eventually, she pulls off on the shoulder and slams on her brakes.
As I’m getting out, I can see her sobbing as I approach.
She screams and slams her fists against the steering wheel, trying to channel her rage into something else.
When she doesn’t stop, I open her door. The sobs take over, and she stops, so I carefully unbuckle her seatbelt and offer her my hand.
I don’t want to force her out of the car because that won’t help.
I want her to choose to help herself so that she can lead.
It takes her a moment, but instead of taking my hand, she nods. “Come on, Liv,” I say, gently pulling her out of the car so I can hug her against my chest. “I’ve got you. You’re okay.”
“This isn’t fair,” she sniffles. “He shouldn’t be able to keep doing this to me.”
“He shouldn’t,” I agree.
“I don’t understand why he hates me so much,” she whimpers. I lift her chin to take her face between my hands and wipe away her tears.
“Some people can only find happiness by hurting others, but you wanna know something?”
“What?” she asks, looking up at me with those big, pretty blue eyes.
“You get to find happiness wherever you want to,” I tell her. “No matter what happens, peace will find you somehow. Whether it be this lifetime or the next, we all get what we deserve somehow.”
“Like karma?” she asks.
“I’d like to think so,” I tell her. “I’d like to think Mom found peace in death, just like you found peace in Willow Creek.”
“Did I?” she asks with a small smile.
“Oh yeah,” I tell her. “What’s more peaceful than living next to your high school bully?”
“Being friends with my high school bully,” she says. My smile is bright, and it makes a blush creep up her neck to fill her cheeks.
My eyes drop to her lips, and I fight everything inside of me to not kiss this woman.
I have never felt more connected to someone than I do her, but I don’t deserve her.
Not after what I did to her. She’s been hurt far too many times in life for me to step in and make it worse.
I can’t be what destroys her. Everything I love dies, and I can’t let her be yet another loss in my life.
She instinctively leans in, anticipating a kiss, but I clear my throat and step back from her. Her entire demeanor changes instantly as my arms drop to my sides. Her shoulders sag, and she’s visibly withdrawn. “Liv,” I say gently.
“Don’t,” she snaps.
“Liv, please,” I say when she turns and walks back to her car. “Olivia.”
“I’m not your mother!” She turns and screams at me. “Just because you couldn’t save her doesn’t mean you have to save me. You don’t get to walk into my fucking life and play knight in shining armor, Bodhi.”
“I understand,” I say, stepping back from her. She’s right. I’m trying to save my mother by forcing myself onto her. That’s not right. I turn and walk back to my truck, but she calls after me.
“Wait. Bodhi, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have…”
“Goodbye, Olivia. See you around,” I say before getting into my truck. I stomp on the gas and speed down the road to put distance between us. I feel like I’m falling apart at the seams, and I don’t know how to fix myself.