13. Olivia #2
It would be a never-ending circle.
Not to mention the others. If he’s told them and held them off, they could be coming in here at any minute to do…I don’t know.
“When we came back from our mission, Franco sat us down in his office to tell us you had…had perished. That we had lost you. I wanted to cry. I wanted to…to fucking find you and hold you and take you to the treehouse and protect you. We failed you. We had to leave you behind and—” He shakes his head.
“We failed you,” he repeats, sniffling. “But we didn’t do that, Spitfire. Please believe me.”
“I-I can’t… I…” I shake my head again, aching to leave his arms and run to the safety of my dorm.
JJ swallows hard, some sort of understanding crossing his features. “I need to gain your trust again,” he whispers. “You won’t take my word for it, will you? You really think we did it?” There’s an edge of hurt in his voice, but he doesn’t back away or throw accusations.
“I saw your eyes,” I whisper, swallowing my emotions.
“You were hidden behind masks, but your eyes were the same. You held me down. Laughed at me. Told me you used me while Franco cut their throats and then—” I raise my chin as his eyes fall to the scar across my throat.
It’s a vulnerable position. My murderer, standing taller than me, staring at the carnage he created. Or maybe not created.
I shudder when his fingers brush against the scar across my throat, following it from ear to ear.
“Livy. You were hurt,” he sobs again, finding the remainder of my scars from the fire that almost killed me. “You got out of the fire. You survived everything. You’re right before my eyes and—”
“Have you told them yet?” I don’t know why I let him continue touching me in such a way that has my muscles relaxing. I’m nowhere near trusting him or even believing his story.
His movements slow but don’t stop as he traces the scars on my face. “It almost felt like a dream to walk into that dorm room and know it was you.”
“How?”
“You… You destroyed your headstone.” His brows furrow. “And I followed your SUV on the cameras; it led me straight to you…straight to the hotel with that old guy. Who the fuck is that guy?” His voice hardens.
“None of your business,” I quickly say. “You don’t get to barge into my life again and demand answers.”
I expect pushback or more words, but he nods, taking a step back and shoving his hands into his pockets, giving me a wounded look. But there’s understanding there. There’s something there that he’s not saying to me.
“You’re right,” he says slowly. “But I want to…I want to know everything. I want to ask you so many more questions. I—” He wipes a hand down his face, rubbing at his eyes.
“I haven’t told them, to answer your earlier question.
I was going to, but you ran off. I didn’t know if it was real or a fantasy or—” He shakes his head. “I couldn’t tell them.”
“Couldn’t? Are you now?” I ask, swallowing hard.
“Do you want me to?” he asks, tilting his head.
“No,” I state.
“Not yet, then.” His lips roll together.
“Never,” I say, shaking my head. “They can’t know.”
“Come to the tutoring sessions,” JJ encourages. “Sit with me. Study with me. I’ll teach you.”
“You aren’t even in those classes; how can you tutor me in them?” I bite my tongue about taking these classes before, because he doesn’t deserve to know those pieces of me.
“We’ll start tomorrow evening in the library.”
“And if I don’t show?” I ask, raising a brow.
“You want to show,” JJ reiterates, looking deep into my eyes like he’s unraveling everything inside me.
“Because if you don’t? I’ll tell them everything.
I’ll show them the surveillance videos of you destroying the headstone and getting into that dark SUV with some strange man.
I’ll show them you walking into your hotel room with long hair and emerging like this.
” He waves a hand at my outfit. “And I’ll show them that the Olivia they thought was dead and gone is alive and breathing and right under their stupid noses.
” He pinches the bridge of his nose. “And when Mack finds out that it was you… God, the fight,” he groans, throwing his head back.
But I’m too stunned by his words to process the fact that Mack essentially set Oliver up to die against Brutus. AKA me.
“Why would you keep my secret? What’s stopping you from going to them now?” I ask.
He takes a step forward, forcing my chin up with his warm fingers.
“Because a long time ago, I had loyalty to a girl whom I fucking loved with all my heart. I swore my life for her. And she for me. The same girl who took me under her wing when I was at my lowest and learned sign language with me. Who understood me like no one else.”
“But you have loyalty to them, too,” I whisper with a trembling voice again.
“Yeah…” He trails off. “I do have loyalty to them, but you always came first.” He leans in and brushes his warm lips against mine and steps away before I can protest. “Besides, I need to figure out what happened to you and prove to you beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn’t us. You understand, right?”
No. Not really, but I slowly nod as the phrase—the woman was too stunned to speak—runs through my mind.
“This…this is our secret?” I ask with furrowed brows.
“For now,” JJ says with a sigh. “We’ll eventually have to tell them, you know that, right? I can’t let you leave here without telling them everything.”
“And if I disappear?”
JJ cocks his head. “I don’t think you will, Spitfire. No one comes back from the dead to dress as a man without reason. You’ve cut your hair. You’ve got contacts hiding your beautiful brown eyes, a binder on your chest, and thick glasses to cover your tracks. You’re hiding something, too.”
And with my heart racing in my chest, JJ exits the room, taking my fucking sanity with him.
“What the fuck just happened?” I mutter to myself, slumping against the wall, all the motivation I had from earlier slowly leaking out of me.
I pull my phone out of my pocket.
JJ: See you tomorrow night, Spitfire. Your secret is safe with me.
JJ: For now, at least…
Me:
I quickly click off that message thread and start a new one with Carter. That asshole. He’s blackmailing me, and I can’t wiggle out of it.
Me: Can you hack into Jasper Jone’s computer and erase everything he has on it?
Carter: The prick with the porn? Wasn’t I just fucking looking into him and found nothing? Now, you want fucking more from me? Greedy-ass Agent Princess.
Huh. That’s news to me about him finding nothing. Last I talked to him was a few days ago, when I had lunch with Jordy and begged him to get me a new identity.
Me: Yes. And Agent fucking Princess? Again?
Carter: I’m bored enough, sure. Anything specific you need me to erase? Your sex tape?
I groan inwardly.
Me: I don’t have a sex tape with him, asshole.
Carter: You sure about that?
I rear back, taking a step toward the door. The quicker I get out of this random office and back into my room, the quicker I can calm myself down from this encounter.
Me: 100% Positive there’s no fucking tape. But there is a tape of me on surveillance footage proving that I’m not who I say I am.
Carter: So…a tape, huh? Let me see what I can do…
Carter: He’s tightened ship with his fucking computer. It’s harder to access. Almost like he was tipped the fuck off that someone was looking into his shit.
Oli: Can you do it or not?
Carter: Need I remind you who the fuck I am? I can do anything. If I have to sneak into his fucking house and smash the shit, I will.
Oli: I’m applauding your dedication from here.
Carter: Fucking snarking at me, Agent Princess?
Oli: Goodbye, Grumpy. And thanks…
Carter: Finally! I get the fucking thanks I deserve.
I shake my head, shoving my phone into my pocket as I exit the room quietly, shutting the door behind me. The guys may have a pull at this school, but I sure as fuck don’t.