45. Dorian - November
FORTY-FIVE
Dorian - November
RESCUE - LAUREN DAIGLE
Fear clawed through my chest with every labored breath as John forced Ellie and me deeper into the tunnels. The sharp tang of blood filled my mouth, a sting radiating from where my teeth tore into the inside of my mouth. Our footsteps echoed in the cavernous space, sharp and rhythmic. Ellie’s gasps punctuated the silence each time John jabbed the gun into her back.
Once we were out of sight of any possible rescue, he shoved us to a stop and tied our hands behind our backs and took our phones. He still didn’t fully trust me, and I couldn’t blame him for that. Coarse rope bit into my skin, every tug sending jolts of pain up my arms and into my shoulders. Ellie walked beside me, her chin high despite the tremor in her frame. Brave, though, the slight shudder in her breath betrayed her fear.
John’s gun swung between us like a pendulum, his focus shifting with each imagined threat. His eyes burned with something feral, something broken.
“You know, Dorian ,” he spat, my name venomous from his mouth, “your precious Noah could have stopped all this. It’s all her fault.”
“I’m not surprised. She fucks up everything, it seems,” I snarled, continuing to play his game.
“She could’ve saved them all,” he said, voice rising, fingers tightening around the grip of the gun. “If she had just come with me all those times. If she’d given me what I needed, none of this would’ve happened. They’d all still be alive. She was the only person to ever stop the noise in my head.”
My mind reeled, trying to make sense of his warped logic.
“Tell me more,” I demanded, anger masking the fear simmering beneath my skin. “What do you mean?”
“She was supposed to fix me! To help me hold it together. I tried to be what I needed to be, but I needed her. And every time she said no, every time she chose something else—she pushed me to this!”
I looked beside me to see Ellie’s face fall, the realization hitting her of just how dire this situation really was. She still believed I was on his side.
Her voice cut through the growing tension, her tone low but sharp like steel. “So, it’s her fault you’re a monster?”
He swung the gun toward her. She flinched but didn’t step back, her wide eyes locking onto him.
“Don’t pretend you understand,” John growled. “You’re just some spoiled pop star who’s never been denied anything in her life. Noah was different. She was supposed to save me. She did save me, at least at first.”
“And the murders?” I pressed, trying to keep his focus on me. “I like that you did that to drag this out, to torture her. It really did a number on her, and the butterfly. Nice touch.”
John’s smile twisted into something grotesque, his tone softening in a way that made my stomach turn. “She was supposed to be my butterfly—my transformation. Every life I took was a message to her, a reminder that she couldn’t just move on. She was supposed to be loyal to me . That was the only way.”
“You’re insane,” Ellie snapped. “You’re both insane. This isn’t about her. It’s about you. This is no one’s fault but your own.”
His jaw ticked, and his expression faltered for a moment, anger flickering like a flame starved of oxygen. “It is her fault. Her and that damn family,” he hissed.
Ellie drew a sharp inhale. “Please,” she said firmly, even as her body trembled. “Just let me go.”
He ignored her, shoving us forward again. My legs felt like lead as we trudged deeper into the labyrinth of tunnels. I fought to keep track of landmarks, a poster here, a door there, but the dim light and endless turns disoriented me as we continued to walk and walk and walk.
Then, without warning, Ellie made her move.
It happened so fast I almost didn’t register it. She spun, her heel driving into John’s shin, then she kneed him in the groin. He stumbled with a curse, the gun jerking upward.
I stood in front of John, buying Ellie time. “Run!” I yelled at her as she ran.
He groaned, hunching over. Then the barrel of the gun swung toward my head, stopping me cold.
“So, you aren’t on my side,” John snarled, low and venomous. “Move and I’ll blow your brains out.”
Ellie’s footfalls faded, and John roared in frustration, firing after her.
Two shots rang out, loud and final, but he missed.
Then the third shot made her stumble, clutching her arm, but she didn’t stop.
“Badass,” I muttered under my breath.
John’s attention snapped back to me. “I knew you were playing me. What the hell do I do with you now, traitor?” he muttered, his voice dripping with disdain.
“Well, you could let me go.” I shrugged.
His lip curled. “Not a chance.”
The shot came without warning.
White-hot pain exploded in my leg, and I hit the ground with a cry, blood already soaking through my jeans.
“Guess you’re not going anywhere,” he said, his tone almost conversational, before taking off after Ellie.
My thoughts raced through the pain—to Gracie. Noah. My family.
I laid there, breathing in shallow, jagged gasps. The pain coursed through my body like fire. Each heartbeat felt like an eternity, even though I knew it was beating too fast, but I couldn’t seem to move.
The blood pooled from my leg, seeping onto the cold cement. The pain was sharp, but it was the terror that really clawed at me. I knew enough to recognize the signs—the bullet had likely hit an artery. I could feel the blood pumping, fast and heavy. If I didn’t get help soon, I wouldn’t make it.
This couldn’t be it. Not like this.
Only minutes ago, I’d been panicking about Gracie’s future while she was under John’s grasp. Worrying that she’d miss out on so many things. Graduation, her first love, her career—hell, even her next art class.
But now, I feared I would be the one to miss those things.
Tears burned in the corners of my eyes, mixing with the sweat on my forehead, but I couldn’t stop them.
Gracie.
I didn’t want her to wake up tomorrow to her world shattered. No warning. No chance for me to hold her, to tell her how much I loved her, to remind her that she was enough.
I thought about her tiny hands holding onto my finger when she was a baby, her face lighting up when I’d praise her. She had this way of seeing beauty in the world that no one else could.
My chest heaved, each breath a struggle. The world felt so quiet, so still. The blood was pooling, but what hurt worse was the realization that I wasn’t sure if I was going to make it out of here. If I was going to be there to walk her through life.
The thought of leaving her alone was suffocating.
And Noah. God, Noah.
I hadn’t even told her how much she meant to me. We’d danced around each other, hesitant and afraid to take the leap, but when we finally did…
Fuck, I was selfish and needed more time with her. I wanted to see her smile when I walked into the room. I wanted to be the one who made her laugh after a bad day, to share mundane moments in the kitchen, or to argue over something silly before falling asleep in each other’s arms.
But instead, she’d carry this with her, wondering if she could’ve stopped it. Wondering if she could’ve saved me.
The hollow ache in my chest grew deeper as I thought about my girls. They didn’t deserve this.
I couldn’t let this be the end.
My leg was going numb, and the world around me was starting to blur. Panic and pain wove together in a storm of confusion and grief. I wasn’t done.
Not yet.
I yanked off my belt with shaking hands, pressing it above the wound. Pain exploded through me, but I gritted my teeth and tied it as tightly as I could. My head swam, and my vision blurred, but I didn’t stop. The blood soaked my clothes, puddling beneath me, but I had to hold on.
Too much left unsaid. Too many dreams to live. Gracie deserved her father. Noah deserved the future I so desperately wanted to give her.
The darkness crept closer, but I forced myself to focus. I couldn’t let it end like this. Not when there was still a chance to fix it.
Panic still surged, but then I noticed the phone a few feet away that must have been dropped in the scuffle. My body screamed at me to give up, but I couldn’t. Not now. I had to fight.
I dragged myself across the cement, my fingers scraping against the dust and grime, the pain in my leg so intense I nearly blacked out.
When my hand finally closed around the phone, I fumbled with it, my hands slick with blood and sweat.
I dialed her number. My vision was fading, and my pulse was erratic, but I couldn’t give up.
Noah’s voice crackled through, desperate and frantic. “Hello?”
“Peach,” I rasped.
“Dorian? Oh my God, where are you? What happened?”
“I’ve been shot. I…. can’t move.”
“Where are you?” she asked, her panic rising. “What do you see?”
I turned my head, my attention narrowing to only her voice—her words. I tried to focus, to make sense of what I saw, but everything was slipping through my fingers. I managed a halfhearted chuckle, a dry rasp that barely made it past my lips. “Sawyer… picture of Sawyer. Running.”
There was a pause. A long, agonizing moment before Sawyer spoke in the background. “I know where that is. We’re coming.”
And just like that, hope glimmered, fragile but alive .
But the pain was relentless. I didn’t know how much longer I had. I could feel the darkness creeping in at the edges of my vision, pulling me closer.
“I’m… I’m bleeding out, baby,” I slurred. Each inhale was ripping through me, and I couldn’t fight the darkness closing in.
“Dorian, stay with me.” Her voice cracked, trembling, as the sound of her frantic breaths filled the line. “Keep your eyes open. I’m coming. Do you hear me? We’re coming.” Her words were thick with panic and desperation, and it was the only thing keeping me from falling unconscious.
I wanted to tell her everything. To make it right. To promise that I’d be there, that I wasn’t going anywhere. But my body was already betraying me. I couldn’t even keep my eyes open anymore.
“Noah…” I could barely get her name out.
“Dorian, no .” Her words were raw, desperate. “Stay with me. I need you. Gracie needs you.” The pain in her voice tore through me like a thousand cuts, but I couldn’t make myself breathe deeper.
I was fighting to stay awake. Every inch of my body screamed for sleep, for relief, but I couldn’t give in. Not now. Not when her voice was still in my ear, begging, pleading for me to stay.
My chest felt like it was being crushed, my breaths shallow and ragged. But I had to make sure she knew.
“Tell G… I love her.” The words scraped through my throat, barely above a whisper, but they were everything. They had to be everything.
“I’m not telling her anything. You’re going to tell her when you see her.” Her voice was stronger now, but I could hear the tears—the deep, guttural sobs. “You hear me, Dor? You are going to tell her. You are going to tell her tomorrow and the next day and every fucking day until you enter the next life, but that day is not today. Hold on for me.”
I wanted to fight to hold on. I wanted to be the man who kept her from feeling that fear, that devastation. But I was losing this fight.
“Take… care of her for me…” The words were barely escaping.
My body felt numb, like I was already slipping into another place.
“ No . We are going to take care of her. You and me. You hear me? We are going to take care of her together! Keep your eyes open. Stay with me!”
She screamed now, loud and frantic. Every word a plea for me to fight. I felt her desperation in the pit of my stomach, but I couldn’t hold on. I was already falling, already surrendering to the void, and no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t stop it.
I still didn’t have the strength to respond. I let her voice wrap around me, curling through my mind like a tether, something soft and fragile, trying to keep me from drowning.
“We still need to finish that dumb show we started. It’s almost Sunday, and you need to be there to help put way too many chocolate chips on Gracie’s pancakes. We can get a dog and name him Stewart like you wanted. There’s so much we still have to do. Please, Dorian…”
My heart sank with every word as she told me all the reasons why I couldn’t leave, all the reasons I had to fight. But the darkness was too strong.
And then, as if she knew, she whispered, “Please, don’t leave me. We’re not done yet.”
We’re not done yet.
I barely managed to croak out the words, so weak, it didn’t even sound like it wasn’t mine anymore. “I love you.”
“No, no, no. No !” Her scream was louder, more desperate than anything I had ever heard in my life.
And then there was nothing. No sound. No light. Only the cold, empty void.