18. Zoe
EIGHTEEN
ZOE
“ A re you ready?”
“For what?” I looked up as Josh walked into the kitchen, hat in hand.
He rolled his eyes at me. “Horse exposure therapy? Come on. Time to meet another horse.”
I groaned, dragging my feet. Meeting Agatha was adorable.
Then there was the Shetland pony named Lollipop.
She’d been a rescue from a bad situation and the poor thing had been in terrible shape.
According to Josh, it took months of working with her to get her to trust humans and she was very shy and more timid around people than I was around horses.
My heart wept for what she must have gone through as I held my hand out with her favorite apple chunks sitting in my palm.
I’d held my breath as she moved slowly toward me and then, with a slight snuffle, took the proffered treat even as my hand trembled.
Her lips were so soft, and she was so careful.
She backed away looking at me as if to ask if that was okay and I had to swipe away the tears that were falling.
Then Josh had asked if it was okay if Agatha joined us and I’d nodded my head, still too choked up to speak. What ensued was several minutes of pure joy as Agatha leaped and danced around Lollipop, who eventually joined her in some spirited play.
I’d remembered to bring my camera that time, and I’d stepped back to take some photos while Josh played with the horses.
My heart had swelled watching it all. Josh might be hardworking and overly focused on the ranch, but that had been a candid moment that clearly showed his love of horses, and it had almost felt too personal to take the photos.
So yeah, horse exposure wasn’t all bad. But that didn’t mean I looked forward to it. Especially when I knew Josh was going to keep pushing me to upgrade in the size and scariness of the horses.
“Don’t forget your camera,” he reminded me as I grumbled and stepped into my shoes.
Maybe if I stalled and delayed enough, there wouldn’t be time to get me comfortable around all the horses. And then I wouldn’t be able to take the close ups needed for the website, which would mean that I’d have to stay longer.
Otherwise, my time here would end soon.
Which should be what I wanted. This was never meant to be permanent. I’d needed a place to stay and a project to submit for grad school. But somehow, being here had come to mean so much more than I’d ever expected.
Josh clapped his hands oblivious to my thoughts. “Come on, time to meet Nelly. She makes Sugar look downright speedy. ”
I gave myself an internal shake to get rid of my confusing and contradicting thoughts and grabbed my camera bag as I followed him out to the paddock closest to the barn. Walking behind him, I barely heard what he was saying because I was still stuck up in my head.
When we got to the paddock, I was surprised to see it was already occupied with a mare the color of chocolate. I froze. While she didn’t necessarily look dangerous, she did look like a smaller version of Jude and I wasn’t prepared for that.
I didn’t realize that Josh was talking to me until he was standing right in front of me. “Zo.” My eyes snapped up to look at him.
“I don’t think I can. She looks a whole lot like Jude.” Before I could move, Josh reached out and gently took my hands, which were shaking.
“It’s just the color of her coat. I promised that I wouldn’t let anything happen to you and I meant it. Nelly is a sweet old lady living her best life. Look.” He turned so he was standing behind me and wrapped his arms protectively around me. “Breathe, Zoe. In and out. You can do it.”
Josh took exaggerated breaths, and I copied him. Together, we watched Nelly slowly make her way around the paddock. When she got closer, I gasped and she instantly picked up her head and turned, as if to look at us.
“Is she blind?”
“She is. My parents rescued her years ago when she was already starting to lose her sight. So long as she’s familiar with her surroundings, she knows her way around, but we’re very careful with her. Would you like to meet her?”
“Is that okay? I don’t want to confuse her or anything. ”
“You won’t. Come on, let’s give her a treat.
” Josh took my hand and together we entered the paddock.
Nelly’s ears twitched as she keyed in on where we were.
Josh started whistling and she immediately picked up the pace toward him, which was still only slightly faster than a snail’s.
We crossed the paddock before she’d taken ten steps and she walked right into Josh and rubbed her head against his chest.
“Awww. That’s so sweet.” She tilted her head when I spoke and I reached out a shaking hand to pet her neck. “She’s almost as soft as Agatha,” I whispered, not wanting to startle her.
“And smaller than Sugar,” Josh pointed out. “Would you like to give her a treat?”
“Sure. Did you bring any apples or carrots with you?” I remembered how much Lollipop had enjoyed crunching the apples.
“No, I brought something else.” He reached into a side pocket and pulled out a banana, which he broke open and peeled, before breaking off a chunk to hold under the horse’s mouth.
“Nelly’s lost a bunch of her teeth over the years, so her food and treats need to be soft. This old lady loves bananas.”
I watched as Nelly delicately picked up the banana chunks and gummed them up as if they were the best thing she’d ever tasted. After she finished each piece, she’d wait patiently until the next was offered to her.
He handed me the last piece of banana and tilted his head toward the horse. As I took it, Nelly seemed to immediately clock that someone else held her treat and she turned her head to look at me with her cloudy eyes.
I held my hand out, palm flat, and she sniffed my hand first before reaching for the banana. Her lips were just as soft as the other horses I’d met and she carefully picked up the chunk and made some sort of happy horse noise as she finished it up .
“We try to get her out to walk at least once a day, more if she’ll handle it. She’s the oldest horse we have here and frankly, it’s been a huge surprise that she’s lived as long as she has,” he said. “Come on, walk with us.”
“Okay, but doesn’t she need a harness?”
“Nope, she’ll stay between us and a few pats to one side or the other will have her shifting direction. I’ll show you. You take her right.”
We walked around the paddock slowly and just as he said, the horse stayed between us.
“This is amazing, Josh. How come I didn’t know you guys also took in rescues?” This was a side to Lost Valley that I didn’t know about and I was already trying to figure out how to incorporate it into the website.
“It’s not something we do regularly. It’s hard enough covering all the costs on a working ranch, and rescues often have health issues or behavioral problems or both.
Bills can rack up quickly with added vet costs and special feeds.
When my parents got Nelly, my dad swore that she was the last one and now that I’ve had to deal with exactly how much it costs to run this place, I understand why, but at the time…
” Josh rubbed his chin. “Well, when I heard about Lollipop, I couldn’t stop myself from hooking up the trailer and jumping in the truck to bring her back here. ”
He chuckled. “I drove nine hours one way to get the pony and when I got back, Dad was furious with me. Started out reading me the riot act until he saw her. She’d looked like—” He paused, as if he couldn’t find the words.
“Well, let’s just say that Lollipop was immediately welcomed here with the caveat that I would be the one working with her, which turned out to be mostly true. Shannon helped.”
I’d been so caught up in Josh’s story, I hadn’t realized that we’d managed a full circuit and were now heading back to the barn.
We guided Nelly into the barn where she was greeted with whickers from her horsey friends.
I stayed outside the stall as he led her in and gave her a rubdown crooning out lots of praise for how good she was.
This was the Josh who could sweep any woman off her feet.
As strong and capable as he was, he also had a soft spot for creatures in need, and he knew exactly how to help them feel safe.
Much like he’d repeatedly done for me. This was the Josh I could fall back in love with—but my heart wasn’t prepared for what would happen when our time together was over.
Because if I was truly being honest with myself, I was already well on my way to loving him.