Chapter 31
thirty-one
AVA
“How’ve you been since Nick and I saw you at Murphy’s?” Laura asks as she moves around the kitchen, gathering different ingredients.
“I’ve been good. I’m loving my job at the bookstore and that I actually have time for myself for the first time in years.”
“Here.” Laura hands me a peeler and gestures to the apples on the counter. “Peel those for me.” She moves to the kitchen island and begins measuring ingredients for what looks like the pie crust. “We didn’t really talk about it at Murphy’s, but you were a lawyer back in Boston, right?”
“Yeah.” I pick up the first apple and begin peeling. “I worked in family law at this big fancy law firm. I was fired the day before my brother called about Scott.”
“Any particular reason you don’t want to continue practicing law?” There’s no judgment in her tone, just curiosity.
I set the first apple down and pick up the next, giving myself a minute to think about what I want to say. “I was raised by two very selfish people. People who probably never should have had children. But they did because that’s what was expected.”
I move on to the third apple, not looking at Laura. “I didn’t realize it until recently, but almost everything I’ve done in my life was because of the manipulation of my parents. I joined the soccer team because that was an acceptable sport for someone like me. I joined the debate team because it would look good on college applications. I volunteered my time for the same reason. I was friends with only the wealthy kids in my class because that’s what they wanted. I learned the piano because that’s what ladies were supposed to do.” I sigh, placing the peeler and final apple on the counter. “I went to law school because I was good on the debate team and was a logical thinker—or so I thought.”
“If you feel comfortable doing it, those need to be cored and sliced.” Laura gestures to the peeled apples. I appreciate her giving me a task and letting me word-vomit so much of what I’ve been holding in.
“I’ve never done that before.”
“I can show you.” She wipes her hands on the towel thrown over her shoulder and comes over to me. “This is a corer. It does exactly what it sounds like,” she says, picking up the metal tool and piercing the apple. “Slowly twist the corer around the center of the apple, and then pull the core out.” Her movements match her words, and the core pops up with little effort. “From there, it’s simply slicing the apple into thin pieces.” She cuts the apple in half and slices a few pieces to show me what she means.
“I can do that.”
“Perfect.” She wipes her hands again before squeezing my shoulder quickly and returning to the dough she was mixing.
Neither of us talk for a few minutes, my focus entirely on the apples in front of me.
“I recently discovered that my parents arranged a marriage for me. To the son of my father’s closest friend.” I glance at Laura, and while she pauses briefly in what she’s doing, she doesn’t say anything. “That same man tried to rape me two weeks before my brother called. It’s why I was fired from the firm.” That’s the first time I’ve labeled that attack for what it really was. And surprisingly, it lifts the last remaining weight from my shoulders.
Laura slowly turns to me, her face filled with rage. “Excuse me? Did I hear you correctly? You were fired because a man tried to rape you?”
“I was fired because the man in question is the son of one of the founding partners, and at the end of the day, I insulted him when I said no.”
“That doesn’t make it any better.” She twists the towel in her hands as if trying to strangle something.
“No, it doesn’t. But when my boss called me in and told me I was being let go, I was relieved. And it wasn’t only because I wouldn’t have to see Brian around the office anymore.” I pick up the corer and begin working on another apple.
“Being fired showed me just how unhappy I was in my life. I was living in a city I hated and working a job I found absolutely no fulfillment in. I didn’t have friends and was so freaking lonely. I just didn’t recognize any of that because my focus was that job.”
Laura slowly turns back to the dough she’s working, recognizing that doing something with my hands is helping me through talking about this.
“Then my brother called, and I jumped at the chance to escape all of it. To focus on something else. Something worthwhile. Something I could feel proud of.”
“Exactly what you needed at exactly the right time.”
“Yeah.” I sigh. “I didn’t have a plan when I got here, but somewhere along the way, this town started to feel more like home than anything in Massachusetts. When I saw the bookstore was hiring, I couldn’t ignore it.” I toss the last few apple slices into the bowl and move to rinse my hands in the sink.
I don’t hear Laura move to my side, but she’s there handing me a towel to dry my hands. “Sometimes not having a plan is the best thing for us. Not having a plan doesn’t have to mean chaos. It just leaves the door open for unexpected possibilities.”
“Unexpected possibilities,” I whisper.
My eyes drift out the window above the sink, and in the distance I can see Gage and Olivia at the chicken coop. They’re laughing about something when Gage throws an arm over Olivia’s shoulders, pulling her into his side and giving her a noogie. The joy on his face sparks something bright in my chest.
My first instinct is to run from it. To fight this feeling growing inside me. It’s too fast to feel this way for someone. We barely know each other. But then I think about it and realize that’s not true.
I know Gage prefers the cold, especially when he sleeps. I know he likes classic rock and indie folk music but hates rap and pop. I know he prefers a comedy to an action-packed movie and hates reality TV. He takes his coffee with a little sugar and a decent amount of milk—though, he hates to admit it. He loves the outdoors and wishes he could spend more time hiking.
His favorite color is green, and his favorite food is spaghetti and meatballs. When he was a kid, he wanted to be a vet.
He loved his time in the military but is glad he’s home and able to spend time with his family. He’s glad his parents are back together and believes this might be the one that sticks. He worries about his siblings and whether he spends enough time with them or if he missed too much while he was in the army.
I know him better than I know anyone else. He’s smart and funny. So incredibly caring and honorable. Adventurous and determined. He’s everything I could want in a partner and so much more.
It might be fast, but it doesn’t make it any less true. I am in love with that man.
“Unexpected possibilities indeed.” Laura’s voice tears me from my thoughts, and there’s a knowing smirk on her face when I turn to look at her. She squeezes my hand before returning to the kitchen island, this time to the spices set next to the bowl of sliced apples. “Can I ask if it’s practicing law you were unhappy with or if the law firm was the issue?”
I move to her side and watch as she measures the spices, pouring them over the apples. “The law firm was definitely an issue, but I don’t know about the rest.”
“Stir those for me.” Laura pushes the bowl toward me before returning to the dough and rolling it out. “I know you said your parents manipulated you into being a lawyer. But if manipulation, and not force, got you there, then it implies you might have enjoyed it at some point.” Her voice is gentle and genuine. I still don’t hear an ounce of judgment.
“I loved it when I first started. I felt like I was really helping people and making a difference, which is what I wanted. But somewhere along the way, it became all about the money I could make for the firm, and it stopped being about helping people.”
“I’m not trying to push you back into doing something you don’t want, but that sounds like the atmosphere you were in was the issue. If you wanted to, you could easily create the environment you’re craving and still use your degree. It wouldn’t have to be here.” There’s a twinkle in her eye when she looks at me. “But Benny Meriwether is getting closer to retirement and has been looking to bring on someone else to take over his practice when he does.” She gestures for me to bring the apples to her where she’s got the bottom pie crust ready in the baking dish. “It’s not just family law when you’re talking about a small town firm, but it’s also not about the money either.”
We’re quiet as I watch her lay the top crust across the apples, cutting off the excess before crimping the edges with a fork. She picks up a knife and gently cuts a few slits across the top for venting. When she’s done, she puts the pie in the oven and sets a timer.
She studies me for a minute before she moves to me, taking both my hands in hers, offering me a comfort I didn’t realize I was missing. “It’s just something for you to think about. I heard what you did for Scott, and it sounds like you’re an amazing lawyer. I’d hate to see you give it up because some bastard ruined it for you.” Her grip on my hands tightens. “Don’t let some man who means nothing ruin anything for you. He’s not worth it.”
I try to keep them in, but the tears fill my eyes and slip down my cheeks. Laura doesn’t hesitate the second she sees them. She pulls me into a fierce hug, rocking me slightly. It’s a mother’s hug, something I can’t remember ever feeling.
Without thinking, I wrap my arms around her and hold on just as tight, the tears falling even more freely now. I’ve known since early on in my childhood that I didn’t have the kind of relationship many daughters had with their mothers, but I didn’t realize how much I craved a mother’s touch and understanding until I got it.
It shouldn’t shock me that Laura freely offers this to me. Her son has been nothing but understanding and caring since the first moment I met him. We may have flirted that first day in the courthouse, but I can see it for exactly what it was now. He saw I was hurting and he wanted to help me forget, even if it was only for a few minutes.
I hear the back door open and the deep timber of Gage’s voice, but Laura doesn’t loosen her grip on me, and neither do I. I know the moment Gage sees us because his voice cuts off, and I feel his heat at my back almost instantly. He doesn’t try to pull me away from Laura or touch me, but his presence is enough, and he knows it because he knows me the same way I know him.
“Everything okay?” he asks softly a few minutes later when I pull away from Laura. He doesn’t give me the opportunity to wipe my tears before he’s reaching to do it himself.
I give him a shaky smile and nod, unable to form the words.
“Yeah, we’re just having a moment.” Laura smooths the hair at the back of my head—another touch I’ve never experienced from either of my parents—before moving to the island counter, where she starts cleaning up the mess. “Nick and the boys should be here shortly. Want to help me with dinner, Liv?”
“Sure.” Olivia moves further into the kitchen and begins helping Laura, the two of them moving around each other and the kitchen as if in a choreographed dance.
“You sure you’re okay?” Gage asks quietly, his hands still framing my face. It’s a gentle touch, one I could easily move out of if I wanted to, but I can read the look in his eyes—he needs to see my eyes when I respond; he needs to see I’m telling the truth.
“I’m okay. Just realizing how much I’ve missed out on with my parents.”
“Oh, Rebel.” He pulls me into his chest, bending so his lips are at my ear. “They’ll both love you fiercely if you let them.”
“I know.” Tears fill my eyes again, my gaze moving to where Laura and Olivia are at the kitchen island. “But why?” I lean back in his arms just enough to see his face, trying to process what it feels like to have parents who freely give their love, not just to their children, but to those their children hold close.
“Because that’s just who they are.”
When I don’t say anything, his eyes bounce between mine, searching for something. He must find it because here, in his mom’s kitchen, with her and his sister standing just a few feet from us, he says the three words I honestly wasn’t sure I’d ever hear with such feeling. “And because I love you.”
The tears fall, but this time, out of pure happiness. The brightness in my chest is back, and it pours from me in waves. I know I only just realized it, but I feel it down to my marrow. I love this man with everything I have and everything that I am.
I press myself closer to him, and our lips collide in a messy, tear-filled kiss. “I love you, too,” I whisper against him.
His arms around me tighten, and his lips lock with mine in a heated kiss. Considering our audience, it's likely not the most appropriate kiss, but I don't care, as my entire being hums with happiness and relief at saying those words.
Before everything happened with my parents and Brian, I always wanted this—this joy and contentment. But since that night in the office and that conversation with my parents afterward, I just didn’t know if it was real. I hoped it was, especially seeing Declan and Quinn together, but sometimes people see what they want, not what’s actually in front of them.
But I guess that goes for everything. If I had been paying better attention from the start, I might have realized it sooner—the love I have for this man and the love he has for me.
“I really wish we weren’t in my mother’s kitchen,” he whispers against my lips.
I smile, leaning back to see his face. “I get it, but I’m glad we’re here. I didn’t know how much I needed it until I got it.” My eyes travel over to Laura, who tries to cover the smirk on her face as she focuses on the chicken in front of her.
“I know,” Gage murmurs, smoothing hair from my face and cupping my cheek. “Now you’re going to get it far more often than you want.”
I shrug, a smile forming on my lips. “Maybe, but I won’t take it for granted.”
Gage leans forward, pressing a tender kiss to my lips just before a commotion at the front door and voices shout over each other.
“Liv said Gage brought his girlfriend home for dinner!” a raucous voice shouts.
“The girlfriend he swore he’d never have!” This one from a deeper voice.
“Boys! You saw his Jeep out front; you know he’s already here.” And that one is clearly Nick.
I laugh at Gage as he rolls his eyes, his grip around me tightening slightly. I lift to my toes and kiss his cheek, the smile never leaving my face. “I can’t wait to meet your brothers. I think I’m going to really love them.”
Gage laughs and swats at my ass as I scamper away, more than ready for the chaos I know is about to happen.