Chapter 29
Chapter
Twenty-Nine
PEARL
P earl was having an out-of-body experience.
Reed—her best friend, her hate-to-love crush, the boy who had captured her first kiss—loved her.
She didn’t know what to do with this information.
This is what happens to other people; this isn’t what happens to me.
“You don’t have to say it back,” he said quickly as she just stared at him in panic. “I fell in love with Bookish—with you. I was going to tell her, uh, you…” He stumbled over his words. “...in Eerie. I’m sorry, I couldn’t wait anymore. Everyone deserves to know when they’re loved, and I love you. If you never want me to say it again, that’s fine. I understand.”
“Keep saying it,” she said quickly, the words escaping her mouth without her consent.
Damn brain .
“Yeah?” He looked shy.
She nodded like a woman possessed.
He kissed her. His lips were soft and loving. “I love your loyalty. I love how you take care of everyone around you without them even knowing it, because you care so deeply.”
Those glittery feelings were back, dancing along her spine.
He noticed .
He kissed a spot on her jaw that always made her sigh. “I love that your backbone is as strong as that godawful tea you drink every morning.” She chuckled. “And you don’t take any shit. I love that you’re feisty and sassy, and you have a gooey caramel center underneath.” He cradled her head in his hands. “I love that you protected me when I couldn’t protect myself when I was younger. And I remember thinking in those moments—when you’d call off the guys who wanted to shove me in a locker, or in the janitor’s closet, or in the auditorium attic?—”
"Don’t forget the girls’ locker room,” she said with a smirk.
He chuckled. “I loved you in those moments, because you stood up for somebody who could do nothing for you. Your heart is made of valor and loyalty and strength. And though its color is black,” he said with a bright smile, “it is pure.”
Tell him, she thought as her mouth crashed to his, overwhelmed at his words.
But I can’t. Too scary. Like being on the top of a high dive but afraid to jump, just standing there shivering.
But I want to. She pushed him toward the couch in the living room.
She pulled his shirt off and buried her face in the center of his chest, licking, kissing.
What if I change my mind? What if I get his hopes up? I can’t be counted on to not fuck something up.
But you loooove him, taunted her heart.
Shut up, shut up, he’s doing that thing with his hands.
“You seem…distracted,” Reed said as he kissed down to her collarbone, sucking on each spot as he toyed with her nipple.
He undid the button of her shorts but lingered there.
She shook her head to clear it. “I’m back, sorry. Sex away, Hemingway.”
He sat on the couch and adjusted his glasses as he looked up at her with a boyish smile. “I like it when you’re bossy, Bookish.”
Uuuungh, I love him.
He tugged the zipper on her shorts down and pushed them to the ground. He kissed the tops of her thighs and turned her hips, placing a kiss right on her ass tattoo.
“But I like it better”—he pulled her hips toward him until she straddled him on the couch—“when you’re right here.” He bit her shoulder, and she ground her clit over his cock.
His hands pulled at her back as she straddled him, crushing her to him in a hot kiss.
Yes .
He tossed off her shirt as she pulled his cock out, greedy for it.
She slid down onto his cock, feeling so full.
He buried his face in her tits, inhaling like she was his last breath on earth. She pulled his head in, crushing her cheek against his hair.
I never knew it was possible to feel cherished while being motorboated.
Love is fucking wild .
A catch in her throat burned as she tried to swallow. He loved her.
Back.
He loves me back.
Just don’t say it. Don’t get dick drunk and let your mouth run wild.
She sighed. But the dick is so good .
She slid up and down lazily on his cock, and he pulled away to look at her. She ran a thumb over his cheek, wanting to tell him how much she cared without saying the words.
Kisses anchored her palm to his mouth, and he kissed each finger, brushing his face against her hand.
“Tell me something,” he murmured as he stared up at her riding him.
Yeah, tell him something, her stupid fucking heart shouted from the cheap seats in her brain.
She kissed his temple, bit his ear playfully. “Like what?” she whispered, trying to keep herself in check.
He grabbed her ass, revved up, and pushed her down on his cock harder. “Anything. I love everything about your brain.” He moaned the word, like her brain was the sexiest thing about her.
“I love you,” burst out of her.
They froze.
“Wait! No,” she yelled, trying to pull the words back in.
Shiiiit fuck. You’re on my shit list, heart. She could hear it cackling as it threw popcorn around, enjoying the chaos.
His eyebrows drew together as he tried to understand. “No? You just got caught up in the moment? Didn’t mean it?”
“Right,” she said, panicked. Shit, I’ve just royally fucked it all up.
He ran his hands down her back, looking concerned. “Okay. What’s important is that you know I love you.” He kissed her cheek, and she felt his cock pulse inside her.
Cool as a motherfucking cucumber.
No judgement, no pushing away. Just gentle kisses on her cheeks.
Forever.
The last gentle kiss on her nose was what broke her.
She needed him. Needed this 6’2, glasses-wearing, mushy-tattoo-having salve against the world. She kissed him with lust and love, claiming his mouth. Wanting him to be hers.
“I love you,” she whispered through trembling lips. Couldn’t look at him. Couldn’t handle stepping off the high dive and watching at the same time.
He paused, head cocked and thoroughly confused. “You don’t…mean it, though?”
“I love you,” she said and finally looked up as she fell through the air, waiting for the splash to hit. The shocking cold reality.
Wonder danced across his face as he registered her words. “You love me?”
Still falling, stomach still swooping.
“It’s fucking terrifying,” she whispered. She felt too skittish to say it all at full volume.
His chest heaved up and down as he nodded. He understood how scary this was for her.
Because of course he does.
That’s why I love him.
“It is scary. But I’m right here.” He pressed her hand to his heart. “I’m right here with you.”
She breathed with him, still falling but getting used to the feeling. She needed his ruddy, perfect lips on her or the universe would simply cease to exist. “I love you,” she murmured into his mouth as he crushed her to him.
“I know, B.” He whispered back between kisses on her cheek and throat, “I love you, too.”
She rode him harder, needing to show him just how much she loved him. “I love you,” she said, again and again. Lost count of the number of times as she stroked every part of his body—his shoulder, bicep, Adam’s apple, chest.
He pushed her hips down harder as she ground against him, again and again. Riding him faster. He sucked a nipple into his mouth and she chased that glittery shower of joy and acceptance.
He loves me.
He slammed her hips down, grinding against him as he stroked her clit in just the perfect rhythm.
“I love you,” she yelled into his shoulder as she came, finally splashing into the cool, glittery waters.
He thrust again and again until he groaned, squeezing her tits and cradling her against him hard, like she was precious.
“ Fuck , my love,” he gasped, squeezing her tighter.
His love .
Warmth radiated through her as she let herself revel in the cedar and peppermint surrounding her.
She nuzzled in, wanting to rub her face into his neck for the next three to five business days.
His mouth lingered on her neck and shoulder as they caught their breath.
“I think,” she panted, tracing his nose with hers, “I’ll like birthdays from now on.”
REED
Reed stood behind the checkout counter, watching his first bookstore event with glee. He’d invited a local children’s book author who raised puppies before they went to therapy-dog school. She stood on the stage surrounded by fifteen kids as she read her book aloud.
The star of the show, however, was a large golden retriever named Bailey who sat beside her. Bailey did all the right commands as the author/trainer read them from the book.
The trainer’s book featured a brave little puppy going to puppy school for the first time and was a great parallel story for young kids going to kindergarten.
Parents stood around, all smiling at the adorable, gangly teenage dog with the working vest on. Traffic had picked up for that Saturday, and he checked customers out happily as the story corner continued in the background.
This is working.
His phone lit up with a call from his mom, and he saw he’d had three missed calls from her already.
He flagged down Pearl. “Can you take over?” he said, nodding at the register.
“Hey, Mom,” he said, answering her call as he walked to the back.
“You’re alive.”
“I’m sorry,” he said guiltily. It had been over a month since they’d talked.
“We were getting worried when you didn’t answer your doorbell.”
Reed stopped in his tracks. “What do you mean?”
“We’ve pushed the button to be buzzed up to your apartment. We’re in Philly, surprising you.” His dad murmured to his mom. “Yes, your father wants you to know we brought you the cookies you like.”
The kids in the story hour laughed at something the trainer said. He gulped. His heart was thundering.
“Are you not at home?” his mom said. “Where are you?”
He jogged to the back of the store, closing the door to the stockroom. “I’m, um, not in Philly. I’m visiting Luca again,” Reed said, panicking.
“Will you be back Sunday evening?” his mom asked. “We can extend our trip and take you out to dinner. Your dad would love to show you some pictures that he took on our stave church architectural tour in Norway.”
“I’m gonna be here for a week. Luca needed help and I took off from work.”
“Oh,” his mother said with surprise. “Well, that was very nice.”
“Look, I’m sorry you came all this way.”
Tell them , he thought. Tell them you're finally happy for the first time, maybe ever.
Tell them you’re in love.
Tell them your crazy idea just happened to work out.
“Your dad wants to talk to you.”
“Now, Reed,” his dad said in a serious voice. “Is it a good idea to take off a whole week when you’re in the middle of that big project?”
“The project’s going well, actually. I, um?—”
“You know,” his dad interrupted, “When I was your age, my boss gave me my career-defining moment after I showed how hard I pushed myself on a project.”
The Punxsutawney Bridge , he thought, knowing where this was going.
“The Punxsutawney Bridge,” his dad said, reliving his highlights.
He felt that nagging need to be perfect for his dad. “That’s a good point, Dad,” Reed said, wanting to be agreeable. “I’ll see when I can wrap things up with Luca.”
He was digging a deeper hole for himself. He just needed time to talk to them in person and explain it all.
Maybe over Christmas.
“All right, good to hear it,” his dad said. “Here’s your mom.”
Reed sighed. He heard another round of clapping in the store as story hour finished up. “Hey, Mom, I gotta go.” All the story hour families would hopefully line up to purchase some books. “Sorry again. I’ll let you know when I’m back in Philly, and maybe we can do something then.”
He jogged back out into the store that his parents still knew nothing about.
To make up for all the other parts of me .