Chapter 28
C ARRAH PULLED INTO a parking space in front of the Chennault Building downtown and glanced up to the second floor. She hoped Chris would forgive her for being radio silent. There had been a lot to process after she’d last seen him in her parents’ home.
One week had gone by since she was humiliated by her father in front of mixed company. If ever there were a time she was made to suffer the stereotype of the dim-witted beauty queen, it was then. She sighed, wishing to forget the shock of Chris being present to witness her father exploit her for Noir’s gain. Daddy Dearest hadn’t bothered to inform her or ask permission. He simply took and gave to the company because it always came first.
Her happiness and what she wanted in life would never matter. The tempered chill inside the Andrews house for the last week was proof. Oddly, she didn’t care to induce a warmer climate. Carrah used the cold shoulder treatment running like a wild vampire to her advantage and stayed in her room, where she prepared for a meeting with her agent and her editor.
Being immersed in a world she created was beyond compare. There were no morning labs, no strict guidelines, no expectations, and she chose what happened. In that world… she chose Chris. There was no denying that she missed their morning tea meets, his deep chuckle, encouragement, and simply sharing life.
It was why she now sat in the parking lot gazing up at his office. For the last week she’d ignored every one of his texts and calls for fear that his glimpse into her life would make him pity her. He was a man who possessed the courage to defy family tradition and find his own way. A man who promised to help because he’d read her potential in a manuscript and believed she had dreams worthy of coming true.
Therefore, Carrah didn’t want his pity. She wanted something else although she didn’t know exactly what that was. The only thing she did know was that she owed him an apology for the distance that had sat between them the last seven days. Once upon a time it was normal. Now, it felt like a crime.
One last pep talk was all it took before she was out of the car, up the elevator, and turning the knob to enter his office suite. Shayla’s stank-faced, dry hello bloomed another bout of insecurity within Carrah. She had been cordial in the emails they had exchanged during the week, but now she wondered if Shayla knew.
“Hi, Shayla, is Chris available?”
“Let me check.” Shayla moved from her desk and disappeared down the hall.
Carrah claimed a seat in the lobby. Her fiddling thumbs went still and her body began tingling with anticipation when she heard footsteps that had to be his since there was no clicking of high heels. He passed the desk, stepping into the lobby looking oh so sexy in tailored gray slacks and a button-down shirt that skipped the neck closure.
“Chris.” She struggled to find her breath. God, the man was fine and those eyes lit up the world. She got to her feet and attempted to close the distance between them.
“What do you need?” He checked the time at his wrist and then pushed her back with his arresting stare.
Take one, no words came out. She took a deep breath and tried again. “Uh… nothing. I, uh, just wanted to come by and say hello.”
A dry chuckle escaped him. “A phone does that job well. Maybe try checking yours. While at it, return calls and respond to messages?” His jaw tensed before his hands slid into his pockets, shifting his stance in a manner that made it hard for her to concentrate. “Is everything okay?”
Her eyes went to the floor first and then she looked around the room and saw that Shayla was not at her desk. It was just them. “Are you asking because you feel sorry for me or for your family?”
Chris’s body went stiff as his nostrils flared to life. “Nei—enjoy the rest of your day. Call me if it pertains to our business arrangement. I’m going to get lunch.”
In a blink of an eye he went out the suite door. Carrah darted behind him. This was worse than she’d imagined.
“Wait,” she called, taking brisk steps to catch him. She slowed when he stopped in front of the elevator and punched the call button with his thumb. “May I come with you? We need to talk.”
He cut his eyes at her then stopped when the elevator dinged. “Well, there’s a genius idea.” He stepped inside the open doors, leaving his sarcasm to grate on her nerves as she followed.
The second the doors closed, he grabbed her and pushed her against the wall. The rhythm of their pounding hearts stirred chaos and yet delivered calm as his eyes stared down into hers, bewitching her into his charms. He pressed his lips against hers demanding affection she willingly returned.
The elevator stopped and he stepped back. Carrah struggled to stand upright. Her knees wobbly, breath shaky, and the ache between her legs begged for attention. She thought the last time they’d kissed, she’d lost her damn mind. This time he’d robbed her of all conscious and reasonable thought. No one compared and all she knew was that she wanted more.
“Are you even hungry?” he asked once they got outside and she nodded yes. “What do you want? There’s a lot in walking distance.”
She cleared her throat, still fighting for composure and mad that he wasn’t. It wasn’t his fault she lacked experience. Besides, he was a little older and she knew he had the reputation of being somewhat of a playboy. Her assertions about him were not exactly wrong all those nights ago at his cottage.
“I’ll eat whatever you want.”
A sly smile curled his lips. “Sure about that? What I want isn’t on the menu at any of these restaurants.” His eyes roved over her body before he snatched his gaze away. “Lucky Dill?”
She nodded again. Her mind was still playing catch-up, and to avoid saying, No, let’s go to your cottage , it was better to agree in silence. They took a few steps together before she looked around and remembered where they were. Luck and early morning had been on their side when meeting for tea.
The lunch hour was riskier. Many of the ladies who worked in the restaurants were employed by the summer crowd, and there were just more people out and about. They could easily become the gossip of the day. It was like white on rice in the Shores, and the very last thing they needed after everything that happened last week.
“Maybe one of us should stay behind for a few minutes. Make it seem like it’s a coincidence instead of popping up together.”
Chris froze. “Is this because you’re betrothed to Trenton?” he asked mockingly, still hating it was even a possibility.
“I just kissed you.” She was cute when she pouted. “I wouldn’t have done that if I were engaged to another man.”
He took her by the hand. “Then stop being afraid of what people say or think.” They began crossing the street. “You do realize there will be people who will not like your book. Are you going to stop writing because they criticize you unfavorably?”
Carrah didn’t answer him right away. He saw that she was processing, attempting to understand the bed of roses she’d been confined to fostered her complacency while providing guard. She had to find the strength he knew she had and use it to be brave on the outside of the box she seemed desperate to escape.
“No,” she finally responded as they arrived at the deli. “I won’t stop. But I also don’t want to provoke unnecessary criticism.” She let go of his hand.
An emptiness he hadn’t expected, but had felt since she’d pulled away last week, cut him down at the knees. Her tenacity was admirable. However, her worrying about the perception of others was problematic. Still, he understood so he conceded.
Growing up the old guard way meant that at a young age you became aware that there was an image and reputation to uphold—and it was everything. Especially when you had a prominent last name that commanded power and wielded prestige. This was the way of the Black elite, and old, ingrained habits died hard.
Besides, if the way she kissed him back in the elevator was any indication of how she felt, then he was doing just fine.
“Compromise,” he said, opening the door. “We order and go back to my office to eat?”
“I’d like that.” She smiled at him then strolled past to go inside.
After managing to beat the lunch rush by mere seconds, they were able to get back to his office with two fried egg salad sandwiches, Parmesan fries, sweet tea, something sweet, and a giddy Carrah. At his desk they sat catching up on the last week while he tried hard not to hold a grudge. Beyond the typical gossip, Gavin demanded a rematch, anticipation for the Red Party was at an all-time high, and the old lodge had been submitted to the city as the site for the youth village. They talked about everything except the meeting between their families.
“How’s it going with Olivia?” He sat back in his chair, sipping the sweet tea that was like his grandmother’s. It was the main reason he loved the Lucky Dill so much.
“She’s amazing. Although in fairness, I have nothing to compare it to.” She continued rambling on about her upcoming meeting with her agent and editor.
All the while he tamped down his urge to ask her if this thing between them was good until the book published. He had to know because he didn’t want this to always be a secret. The questions gnawed at him. However, he wouldn’t push. He got the sense that Carrah was being tugged and pulled more than necessary by her family. She had already been riding the seesaw with regard to their client-attorney relationship, and he didn’t want her to shut down on him again.
“Oh my goodness!” She shot up in her chair, watching as he unboxed a strawberry cupcake. “You’re not full? I’m stuffed.” Her hand wrapped around her stomach as she leaned back in her chair. “I’ve seen the Lucky Dill for ages, but had no idea it was so good.”
“As my grandfather used to say, good things come to those who wait.” He took a bite out of the sweet treat, savoring the fresh-baked taste and from-scratch frosting. “Blame it on Dunc. He took me there forever ago for one of these”—he held up the cupcake—“and I make it my business to drop in at least once a week.”
Carrah burst into laughter. “Your sweet tooth is insane.”
“It is well documented.” He chuckled, taking another bite out of his dessert.
She giggled a few minutes more, watching him polish the cupcake off. All of a sudden her smile fell flat. She stared at him from the opposite side of the desk while it appeared as though she were searching for words. “When we left your cottage that day… did you know you would see me later?”
A part of him was fine with her avoiding this conversation. He’d grappled with it ever since she ghosted him the last week. If he told her the truth, she might disappear for another seven days. If he lied, he was delaying the same outcome because it was inevitable she would find out. Their lives were too close.
“I did,” he confessed. “I wasn’t allowed, but not because of my family. Your father requested the strictest confidence. He explicitly stated that his children were unaware. At the time I was certain he was illustrating his definition of confidentiality because no one knows we talk. Most think we are still running around the same circle of friends avoiding each other.”
“I wish I could say I didn’t understand. I do. I just… I mean, if you could’ve—”
“No.” He breathed heavily, for he already guessed she had thought this. “I refuse to bring the business between our families into this.” He moved his hand between them. “I’m already in a bit of a pickle anyway.”
Her face softened. “Care to explain?”
Chris had to explain, make it clear for them so they could land on the same page. He unlocked his computer, filtered to all the emails associated with Carrah, and then turned his screen so she could see. “All of these emails are about you. The ones flagged have my attention. They have moved up your release date and Olivia has even inquired about my review for a contract of a film agent.
“You’ve mentioned revisions. Soon they’ll want a detailed synopsis of book two. I’m not seeing how you meet your deadlines and collaborate with my cousin in a lab. I also don’t see how you will enjoy the rest of summer, but that is a drop of water in the larger bucket.”
Her gaze fell to her lap and stayed there for longer than a few minutes as she twiddled her thumbs. He allowed the quiet to spin around them and give her time to think about the commitments that lay ahead. Carrah was new to the entertainment world, and whereas she might wield some control at Noir, she didn’t have that same power at Hurston House yet. If she made a list, a popular book club, and gained crossover appeal, maybe. For now she had to prove herself and he wanted her to be a success.
“You really are the best, huh.” She finally looked back up and focused on his face. “You know everything I’ve never told you.”
“You’re my client. It’s my job to know and anticipate. I’m also on both sides of this, which is the pickle I mentioned. Normally, I’d recuse myself. I can’t and won’t because it would raise suspicions and abandon my promise to you.”
A small smile curved her lips. “Your mother raised you to have honor in your word.” Chris nodded. He would never forget Claudette’s creed. “Thank you,” Carrah said, slightly above a whisper. “For not forcing or telling me which one to choose. That is rare in our world.”
“Oh, to be a family within the old guard.” He returned her smile. “You did more for my brother than you’ll ever know… and… me too. You grounded me. I didn’t realize how lost I’d been since losing my mother until I committed to helping you.”