Chapter Twenty-Two
Tamsyn’s sneakers slapped against the shiny beige tiles of Hawker’s Memorial Hospital’s third corridor.
The sound was like gunshots in the empty hall.
She was so aware of her feet she barely even noticed the sage walls or the framed artwork—a dusty outback road disappearing into a heat haze, a long gum tree bending in the wind, a mob of kangaroos frozen mid-bound across rust-colored plains—evenly spaced every few feet.
Not that Tamsyn would admire them anyway.
The only thing on her mind was Isla. Even now, a full day later, every time she closed her eyes she saw Isla falling.
Over and over, she could hear the sickening thwack of her temple against the ramp.
And she could feel the twisting, shattering sensation in her own stomach, as if her bones had snapped too.
By the time Isla hit the ground, she was out cold.
Tamsyn had sprinted down the ramp, barely aware of the cameras or the shouting. Someone had yelled for the medic team, and by the time Tamsyn had sunk to her knees at Isla’s side, the production’s medical team had swooped in like a swarm of bees.
“Give them space,” someone had said, then hands had grabbed at Tamsyn’s shoulders, her arms, her waist, pulling her backward. For a strange, somewhat disorienting second, she’d felt suspended there, watching as someone checked Isla’s pulse and shone a light in her eyes.
“She’s unconscious but breathing,” one of them had said.
Then the stretcher had appeared, and the metal legs had snapped open. They’d lifted Isla onto the bed and wheeled her away toward the waiting ambulance. Tamsyn had watched with eyes that hadn’t felt like her own and had experienced the most helpless feeling in her entire life.
“Can I help you?” a nurse asked when Tamsyn reached a counter. The woman was a bright-eyed twenty-something-year-old with sleek black hair pulled back into a low bun.
“I’m looking for Isla Stone,” Tamsyn said, wondering if she should add that she was from Outlast Her, that she’d quit the game the very minute Isla had disappeared into the ambulance, and that Elise Mercier herself had escorted Tamsyn back to the Waratah Ridge, where the contestants stayed before filming.
Elise had asked Tamsyn a string of personal questions, including what her relationship with Isla was.
Tamsyn had answered with brutal honesty.
“I love her. I’m in love with her. And I don’t want to finish this game without her.
” Elise had then smiled sweetly, genuinely, but Tamsyn couldn’t help wondering if she was thinking of all the ways to spin this into excellent television.
The nurse checked the computer screen and then leaned over the counter. “She’s in room 108,” she said, pointing a finger down the hallway. “Straight, then take the second right.”
Tamsyn thanked her and headed down the corridor.
The last time she’d set foot in a hospital, she was eight years old, and they’d removed her appendix hours before it was due to burst. Or so she’d overheard her mother whispering dramatically to her father in the hallway.
The fear of exploding organs had knocked the wind clean out of her, and somehow she’d gotten it in her head that hospitals were places where bodies frequently erupted.
Something that apparently hadn’t changed much.
When room 108 came into view, Tamsyn stopped.
She tugged a few braids behind her ears.
She felt so clean after her shower this morning.
She’d even rubbed a generous amount of face cream into her skin, which now felt hydrated and glowing.
And before the driver had picked her up to take her to the hospital, she’d quickly brushed a careful coat of mascara across her lashes.
She didn’t look like her usual self, but she was close. Close enough.
She knocked.
“Come in,” Isla’s voice rang through the closed door.
Tamsyn felt a weight fly off her shoulders.
She wasn’t even sure why she was so relieved because Elise had personally shown up at her door last night with the update.
Isla had sustained a concussion and a fractured fibula.
Painful, but thankfully manageable. No surgery was needed.
Just a few weeks in a walking boot and crutches while the bone healed.
Hearing Isla’s voice made her heart flutter in her chest. Isla was fine. She was safe.
Tamsyn pushed open the door and stepped inside.
The curtains had been pulled mostly closed, leaving only a thin ribbon of late morning sun slipping through the gap.
Isla was propped up against a mountain of pillows.
She was wearing one of those infamous hospital gowns.
Pale blue with tiny navy diamonds, tied loosely at the back.
One shoulder slipped free. Her hair, which was usually wind-tossed and looped in a messy bun above her head, was down and hung cleanly over her shoulders.
A bulky grey boot sat on the chair beside the bed, while the lower part of her left leg was propped on two pillows like a royal limb.
A plastic hospital bracelet dangled loosely from her wrist, and there was a small strip of tape near her temple.
Despite all of that, she looked... well, like Isla.
Her eyes caught Tamsyn’s and then widened.
“Tamsyn?” Isla spluttered, pushing the magazine lying on her lap—an Australian travel destination magazine with a wallaby on the front page—to the side. “What are you...” She pushed herself more upright, wincing slightly as her leg shifted. “What are you doing here?”
Tamsyn opened her mouth to speak, but Isla barreled on. “Did they let you visit me? Are you going back right after? Why are you wearing...” Then realization hit her like a sandstorm.
“No!” Her eyes grew wider. “You didn’t—” She stared at Tamsyn like she couldn’t believe it.
Which was understandable. Even Tamsyn couldn’t yet believe that she wouldn’t be out there anymore: fighting through challenges, living on beans and rice, going to sleep when the sun went down.
This morning when she’d woken up on the soft mattress, with sunlight filtering through sheer linen curtains, she’d expected to drag herself up from the ground, make the careful walk to Moon Pit with one eye on the dirt path scanning for snakes.
But that didn’t mean she regretted quitting. On the contrary, she hadn’t thought twice about it. The decision had come as easily as breathing.
“You quit the game?”
“Kind of,” Tamsyn said, not sure why she hadn’t already crossed the room to Isla’s bed and cupped her palms over Isla’s cheeks.
Why wasn’t she already kissing her? But then again, hospitals made everything seem fragile.
“They said I could either quit the game or be formally eliminated. Since you got injured and we’re a team, they said we can still form part of the Final Council. ”
“But why did you quit? Why not make them formally eliminate you then?” Isla asked. “Why not carry on with the game until they forced you out?”
“Isn’t it obvious?” Tamsyn said, stepping closer. Not a lot. Just two steps.
Isla’s mouth opened, then closed.
Tamsyn didn’t mind spelling it out. In fact, she hoped to get all these swirling feelings off her chest. “I quit because I wanted to go out on my own terms, and I quit because I can’t imagine one more day in that game without you.
Love means more than money or winning the Ultimate Outlast Her title,” she said, then took another step closer to the bed.
If she wanted to, she could reach out and touch Isla’s elevated leg.
But she didn’t. Not yet. “I quit because I can’t imagine waking up in the morning and not seeing your face, not hearing your laugh or listening to your voice—which, by the way, I was quite disappointed when you lost that little French accent from Season One. ”
Isla laughed loudly and then winced. She touched her temple with two fingers.
Tamsyn mouthed an apology. She didn’t want to see Isla hurting. She wanted to take the pain away. But she also needed to get all of this off her chest, which, frankly, was overwhelming. “You deserved to win this season, Isla. Out of everyone there, you’re the most worthy.”
Isla parted her lips to speak, but Tamsyn didn’t let her.
“You don’t realize what you do to people,” Tamsyn said quietly. “And I don’t know how to explain these feelings other than coming across as extremely corny.”
“I like corny,” Isla said, batting her eyelashes.
Tamsyn’s heart fluttered. “Well then, here goes.” She took a deep breath.
“When I first saw you at Mallory’s place, I nearly made Mikey leave with me.
It was like seeing someone larger than life.
I was intimidated. But then I plucked up the courage and introduced myself, and never in a million years did I think we’d end up together in that powder room.
And then we said goodbye, and I went back to Santa Monica, and I thought about you every day.
I can’t count the number of times that I wanted to DM you.
My notes app is full of half-written letters to you.
But I was scared, which is hilarious because I jump out of planes for fun.
I couldn’t face the thought that you wouldn’t get back to me.
And then I saw you during that run out here in Flinders.
And looking back now, it was fate. We were meant to bump into each other. We were meant to pair up.”
“You forget that I pretended I didn’t know you,” Isla pointed out.
“That was just a hiccup,” Tamsyn said, chuckling.
She stepped closer. This time her hip bumped the bed.
“A glitch in the matrix. Easily overlooked because being around you feels like that first warm kiss of sunlight on your cheeks after a week of grey skies. It’s intoxicating.
Sometimes I can hardly breathe around you. ”
Isla’s eyes were teary. Her lip trembly.
“I’ve never met anyone like you. I love you, Isla Stone. And I know the real world is messy. I know this wasn’t reality, and you live in New York, and I live in Santa Monica, and statistically speaking, long-distance relationships are—”
Isla grabbed her wrist. Her fingers were soft and strong. Tamsyn nearly melted into a puddle at her touch. “I’ve never cared much about statistics,” she said, pulling Tamsyn even closer.
Then she kissed her.
Isla’s lips found Tamsyn’s in the softest touch ever.
They were like a feather skimming the water.
Tamsyn inhaled deeply, and before she could even ask if kissing was allowed with a concussion, Isla’s mouth pressed harder.
Her teeth teased, her tongue flicked in a sudden, electric brush that made Tamsyn lean in.
Her hand rose instinctively to cradle Isla’s jaw.
At the same time, Isla’s fingers slid across the back of Tamsyn’s neck.
“I love you too,” she muttered against Tamsyn’s lips.
“I love you so much.” Then the kiss deepened.
But only for a moment before Isla winced.
Just a little, but enough for Tamsyn to soften the kiss.
When they finally pulled apart, both of them slightly breathless, Tamsyn rested her forehead lightly against Isla’s.
“By the way, the ramps were apparently supposed to be clean before we started the challenge. One of the testers left a smear of mud on the wood. If you wanted to, you could sue.”
Isla shook her head but didn’t once lose contact with Tamsyn. “I don’t care about a lawsuit,” she said, smiling. “I only care about you.”